Super (stupid) hero (boyfriend)
Summary: Mai could honestly say that she had no idea how it had happened, but somehow she had become a sidekick to a dork that put on a Halloween mask to fight crime. Superhero AU.
Pairings: Maiko, Sukka.
Warnings: None.
A/N: This quickly became more humorous than I had planned, and the dialogue practically wrote itself. Seriously. Anyway, the Zuko in this fic has fewer issues, due to Daddy not burning his face because he dared to care about human lives.
1.
"You're bleeding all over my carpet."
"Hi to you too, Mai."
"It's going to stain."
"Yes, clearly that is what I'm worried about right now."
"Shut up. Take off your shirt."
He raised his eyebrows exaggeratedly. "If you insist."
"Shut up," she said. Then she kissed him.
"Mmph – ! …Mm. Mmm. Ow."
"Right. Injuries first, kissing later."
"There'll be kissing later?"
"Duh."
"Oh, okay. Wow."
"Shut up. Idiot."
.
.
.
"How, exactly, did this happen?" Mai asked tersely as she wrapped bandages around Zuko's arm. "And by that I mean, 'How were you injured, why do you have swords strapped to your back, and why did you decide it would be a good idea to climb through my bedroom window instead of going to the hospital like a normal person?'"
"I think – ouch, careful – I think that's the most you've said at one time."
"Having an economy with one's words is not a bad thing. And don't change the subject. I'm sure you realize it looks a bit suspicious, what with the mysterious injuries and the giant swords."
"They're hardly giant."
"Not the point. Answer the question."
"That's kind of a long story."
"We have time," she said flatly.
.
.
.
"So you're a superhero."
"Um, was that supposed to be a question? I can't really tell."
"You're the Blue Spirit."
He perked up. "You've heard of me?"
"I've seen your wanted poster."
"Oh. Wait, I have a wanted poster?"
"Focus."
"Right." He fidgeted. Mai cleaned her nails with a knife. Judging by his facial expression, he was both impressed and intimidated. That was the point. "So, I'm the Blue Spirit."
"By all means, let's just repeat things that should have been said a long time ago."
"The way you're spinning that knife is making me really nervous."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Um."
.
.
.
After a long conversation about honesty and Zuko's tendency to run around the city with a mask, Mai leaned back and asked, "So what are we going to do?"
"We?"
"Of course. You can't just expect me to wait at home like a good little girlfriend."
"G-girlfriend?"
She leveled a look of annoyance but felt a fission of uncertainty all the same. "Problem?"
His face softened. "Nope. Not at all."
"Good."
.
.
.
"I'll need a what now?"
"A costume," Zuko repeated. "Or at least a mask."
Mai didn't have superpowers but she did have a rather alarmingly large collection of pointy objects that she knew how to throw with deadly accuracy. She had demonstrated this to Zuko by pinning him to the wall with a few knives that she had thrown lightning-fast. This had quashed his initial protests about her safety, and Mai found that he was quite enthusiastic about introducing her to the superhero club. According to him, first on the list was costume shopping. He was having a bit of trouble convincing Mai to wear one though.
"I don't need one," she insisted.
"It'll protect your family from villains coming after them as revenge against you."
She raised an eyebrow at him.
"Okay," Zuko conceded, "I get your point, but what about Tom-Tom?"
Her forehead furrowed minutely. "Fine."
.
.
.
Okay, so the whole costume thing wasn't so bad. Zuko had said that he would take her to a designer that catered specifically to superheroes and whose discretion was assured.
Mai hadn't been expecting to meet a diminutive woman with enough personality to fill a room though. By the end of her consultation, she had agreed to both a mask and a costume. She wasn't quite sure how it had happened.
"Dah-ling, red is your color! So beautiful, like a rose! Dangerous and sharp! Exquisitely deadly! The fabric, what kind of fabric? Fireproof, obviously, but what else? And pockets! Lots of pockets for pointy objects! Then we get to the mask. Something simple, elegant. Something that says, 'I can cut off all of your fingers if you cross me.' Too understated?" she asked when Mai blinked. "Not violent enough? Work with me, dah-ling! Work with me!"
With that, Mai was led away, trying not to let her bewilderment show. From the grin on Zuko's face, she hadn't fully succeeded.
.
.
.
The costume… wasn't so bad.
Okay, fine. It was actually quite good.
There was no spandex in sight, and the clothing didn't look too flashy or ridiculous. In fact, Mai thought there was a certain class to it. She was relieved to learn that unlike the heroines in the comic books that she had read, her costume wasn't revealing.
The fabric was red and black, and apparently fireproof, though Mai wasn't planning on testing that anytime soon. There were flowing sleeves that slipped over her hands – perfect for hiding all manner of pointy objects – while her pants billowed as well. Built into the clothing were an assortment of hidden pockets, straps, and holsters. There was even a wrist mechanism that could shoot out small arrows.
The mask was black (a plus, as far as Mai was concerned) and covered the upper half of her face. Delicately etched into it were roses with thorny stems that twisted around the bottom.
"Wow. You look…nice."
"I feel ridiculous," she complained without any heat. She actually felt a bit powerful. Safe, certainly. She was armed to the teeth, and she felt dangerous.
"Well, at least you won't be bored."
"Yes, there is that." Mai showed the hint of a smile. "Just remember, I'm not your sidekick."
A/N: Edna Mode cameo!