Meluvtasuki does not own Tales of the Abyss. She wants to but doesn't.

One night at the bar

Jade, Luke, and Guy entered the bar. They sat down and ordered their drinks. Jade ordered first and then Guy and Luke ordered the same thing. Jade "accidentally" forgot to make sure they knew it was the strongest drink there.

Luke went up to a girl with a six-foot purple braid. "Hey! Wanna head to the inn together?"

"I'm a guy."

"Ok" Luke walked off. He came back two minutes later. "Wanna head to the inn together?"

The man immediately threw him through the nearest wall.

Guy went outside and ran into a girl with a brown ponytail.

"Wanna head to the inn?" The girl immediately started to pound him. It took her friends ten minutes to pull him off.

Guy stumbled back into the bar. He ordered another drink. Meanwhile Luke was getting killed by a monk kid in a red kimono. Apparently he found out about his possessed hand near their girlfriends. The two of them (a demon slayer and a priestess) were beating him up too.

Guy went back outside and headed toward the Albiore. Noelle was sleeping and didn't notice him coming in. He fired up the Albiore and flew in a circle. Then he chased after a bird that was flying around. At this point Noelle woke up. Unfortunately (for her and the innocent people in the bar) Guy had decided he needed to land. He dove down straight at the bar.

Luke came out of the inn with a girl who had a red braid. He was suddenly feeling very weak. He looked up in the sky.

"Hey Al! I finally got someone!" (Al is the albiore) Guy promptly crashed the ship into the bar. Luckily everyone survived. Well except for Al and the bar. So Jade had to arrest Guy and Luke for sexual harrasment, and for destroying the bar. Noelle started pounding every piece of Guy that she could reach.

"Now see what your boyfriends did?" Jade showed the security tape to Tear and Natalia.

"I am going to kill them!" Natalia ran out the door.

"No you won't! They'll already be dead by the time you get there." Tear commented.

"How?" Natalia looked back at her.

"Because I'm going to kill them myself!" Tear and Natalia ran out the door. Guy and Luke were in the hospital for six months until their injuries could recover.

This is a quick list of all the girls Luke and Guy hit on. (I don't own any of them)

Guy: Lita(sailor moon)

Luke: Nuiko(Fushigi Yuugi), Viola(Eternal Sonata)Sango and Kagome(Inuyasha), Makoto (W Juliet), Ridley(Radiata Stories), Collette(Tales of Symphonia), Garnet(Final Fantasy IX), Noin(Atelier Iris 2), Monica(Dark Cloud 2), Ruby(Dark Cloud), Potpourri(Harvest Moon:Mineral Town series), Keira(Jak and Daxter), Kairi(Kingdom Hearts), Jeane(Suikoden), Zelda(Zelda), Soi(Fushigi Yuugi).

...Is it any wonder those two wanted to kill them?

Yes I know this is stupid but it just popped into my head and refused to leave. So I had to type it out. Please be sure to R&R!!