A Very Akatsuki Christmas
Disclaimer- this is an AU (alternate universe) where they are just a group of friends rather than a murderous group.
"'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the cave, not an Akatsuki was stirring, not even Tobi." Tobi is interrupted by a fit of giggling.
"Oops! Sorry sorry sorry." He rapidly tries to regain his composure. "Ok, ok." He takes a few deep breaths. "Here we go." He inhales and prepares to continue his poem.
"Ah shut up Tobi." Kisame calls from his seat in front of Tobi.
"Oh come on, go easy on him. It's his first Akatsuki Christmas." Deidara tries to reason with Kisame.
"And? What's your point? That doesn't mean he can't come up with a decent story to get our little party started."
"My point is that he's probably nervous. Ain't that right Hidan my man?" Hidan just stares at him, a terrifying sight for most. "Ah come on! Wipe that little grimace off your face. Just because you don't have a beauty like Konan at your side doesn't mean you gotta be so cold." Deidara exclaims with a chuckle as he wraps his arm around Konan and pulls her closer to him. Konan blushes, a sight that until a few months ago was impossibly rare. Today was her 4 month anniversary with Deidara, and it also happened to be Christmas Eve.
"Ok!" Pain calls as he enters the room, "I believe that if we're to finish this before 3am, like last years party." He glares at Deidara, who just laughs and gives Konan a kiss. "That we need to move it along." He finishes.
"Ok then. Let's do our little random gift exchange then." Toreb says as he stands and walks past Tobi to the Christmas tree. "During the selection I got konan." He grabs a good sized box from under the tree. "Here you go." He crosses to Deidara and konan and gives her the present.
Konan opens it and gasps as she pulls out a miniature puppet of Deidara. "Do you like it? I don't know what kind of gifts sasori gave, but since he died and I'm our newest member, I thought I might as well go all in."
"It's great Toreb!" Konan exclaims.
"Watch this." Toreb attaches his chakra strings to the puppet and it pulls out a small clay bird. It throws the bird into the air and it explodes in a show of sparks and confetti.
"Well I think my explosions are better." Deidara jokingly says, "And it doesn't quite capture my handsomeness." He smiles with a glint in his eye.
"I think it's wonderful Toreb! Thank you." Konan says as she rises and crosses to the tree. "I suppose it's my turn for a gift." She grabs a smaller box and turns, "I got you Itachi." Itachi gets up from his seat next to Kisame to accept his gift.
She hands him the box and he sits in the center of the semicircle and opens it. Out fly a dozen paper butterfly's. Inside the box is a small paper replica of Sasuke and Itachi when they were children. "I hope I didn't overdo it. But since you loved your brother so much back then, I felt like it would be a good gift..." Her voice slowly fades out as Itachi gets up, a single tear falling freely from his eye down his face, and leaves the room with his gift. Never saying a word.
"Good job Konan." Kakazu says with mock sarcasm.
"I...I didn't mean to..."She tries to explain.
"It'll be fine, Sasuke is still a sore subject with him." Kisame tries to comfort her.
"Ok then!" Deidara stands up, "let's get this show on the road." He motions for konan to sit back down, as she had gotten up to follow Itachi.
"My gift is for you hidan." He grabs a small box out from under the tree. He tosses it to hidan who catches it and with a lack of finesse and grace, tears it open.
"Is this-"
"Yup! A statue of that god of yours. Jarvis or whatever his name was."
"JASHIN! Lord Jashin!" Hidan snaps at him.
"Hey calm down it was just a joke." Deidara backs up as hidan had gotten up threateningly.
"Deidara..." Konan whispers. "I think it's time to tell them."
"Tell us what?" Hidan says, still angered by deidara's joke.
"Oh you're right! Ok everyone listen up! Konan here." He looks at her lovingly. "Is pregnant!" He finishes with a shout.
"What?!" The simultaneous yell from the surrounding members.
"That's right! We're gonna be
parents!" He takes her hand in his and looks at her again. A loud grin plastered upon his face."
Silence. No one says anything for a short while due to the shock. Suddenly pain breaks the silence, "Congratulations!" He steps forward and gives them both, Deidara then konan, a hug.
"Yeah!" Kisame stands up and approaches them. "Congratulations you two will be great parents. Let's hope he or she doesn't inherit your 'explosive' personality, eh Deidara." They all laugh and the tension in the room fades away.
"YAY! YAY! YAY!" Tobi screams and runs towards them. He envelopes them in a giant hug, nearly tackling them to the ground.
"Hey! Calm down man!" Deidara barely gets the words out as Tobi crushes them in his monster hug.
"DEIDARA'S GONNA BE A DAD! DEIDARA'S GONNA BE A DAD!" Tobi chants. His excitement gradually infects everyone in the room and soon they're all laughing and their faces are split by huge grins.
"Well then." Deidara says once they all calm down. He grabs his mug of eggnog, as do the others. "Merry Christmas!" He yells out as he thrusts his mug in the air.
"Yeah!" Comes the collective roar as the others join his cheer. They clank their mugs together and down the contents of them.
"This is what I'd call a very Akatsuki Christmas." Deidara says then throws his head back in laughter. He looks at Konan. His child's mother. Tears are streaming down her face, tears of joy. "Now we can't have that." He tells her as he pulls her closer and kisses her passionately. As they break away he says, "let's go celebrate our special way." She smiles at him, a beautiful sight. And they walk out together hand in hand, to have some private fun.