Abandon Me
Summary: Just turn your back. Leave me here to bleed. Slight Gaarax? One shot
I would watch him.
Stare at him from afar.
Admire his unknown beauty.
Watch him.
I am sure he knows i'm here.
I am possitive.
But why doesn't he do anything about it?
I may never know.
XXX
We have had a few encounters with eachother.
We have talked before.
Small talk.
That's all it was.
Nothing more.
His name is Gaara.
He is known as a demon.
A monster.
Not to me.
To me he is a person.
A human being.
Not a monster.
No.
Never.
XXX
My friends.
My friend.
My only friend i could ever have.
She left.
She doesn't care about me.
Not anymore.
I don't know why.
People.
The precious people of my life are fading away.
Drifting away from me.
They don't care anymore.
Nobody does.
All I can have to trust is my razorblade.
My little friend.
Something to help me through my troubles.
Something to help me feel safe.
Let out my bottled up emotions.
XXX
I was walking through town.
Ever since i was abandoned by my one friend, I have been avoiding him.
Gaara.
I think i love him.
I don't want to.
I can't.
We could have a happily ever after.
We could, but I doubt it.
Those are fairy tales.
They are untrue.
There is no such thing as a 'Happy ending'
There never is.
There never will be.
It always ends with death.
Abuse.
Divorce.
Un-happy endings.
Just like my fairy tale.
My fairy tale is ending.
XXX
I wore a long sweater today.
I wanted to hide the cuts that trailed up my arms.
Scars.
I want to hide them.
I want to hide myself.
I want to get away from the world.
I want to stop this pain!
I want...
I want...
I want to find my happy ending...
XXX
He talked to me today.
Gaara.
After years of avoiding him, he talked to me.
I tried running away.
My heart kept telling me to stay back with him.
My brain told me to run.
I tried.
I really tried to get away.
He wouldn't let me.
He asked me what was wrong.
I couldn't tell.
I couldn't.
All my body could do was stare torward the sand littered ground.
Keep my eyes away from him.
I couldn't break away.
I couldn't.
He had caught me in his sand...
XXX
He had found out.
He had found out about my addiction.
He knew now.
Gaara knew.
My blood had stained my walls.
My floor.
My sink.
Everywhere.
He had even looked at my arm.
He saw the scars.
Everything.
He knew...
He...Knew...
My bloody addiction.
My life.
He knew.
XXX
He has been avoiding me.
I try the same but my heat hurts.
It yearns for his touch.
It was so painful.
It hurt so much
...yet...
There was nothing i could do.
I just had to take it.
Feel the pain and suffering that gaara had gone through.
Feel the hurt.
XXX
We had finally made up.
We can talk more now.
We can actually smile now.
I...
I...think...
I think I love him.
No.
I know I love him.
Gaara.
My knight in shining armor.
My field of hope.
My light.
The one thing I live for.
Gaara.
Sabaku no Gaara.
XXX
He...
Gaara...
He has an arranged marriage.
I coudn't believe it.
He can't love me...
He can't love her.
No!
He Can't!
I love him...
My one true love.
The only person i have ever loved.
Gone.
I got mad at the news.
We had gotten into a fight, and now Gaara wont even speak to me.
He won't even look my way.
He despises me.
Hates me.
He won't talk to me.
He won't listen to me.
He just walks away.
He is slowly disappearing from my life.
Just like...
...Everybody else...
XXX
Everynight, I would cry myself to sleep.
Everyday, I would put up a fake mask of happiness.
Not that anybody noticed, nor did they care.
Everyday, I suffered the pain.
Every single day.
Torment.
Suffering.
Pain.
Sadness.
Why must i feel this pain?
Why...?
My heart is ripping to shreds.
A bloodied wound, forever scarring my heart.
My soul.
I can't take it.
I can't take it!
I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!
I jumped onto my bed.
My face was buried into the pillow, damping it with my tears.
The tears won't stop.
They won't...stop...
Thank you Gaara.
Thank you for hurting me.
Thank you for screwing up my life.
Thank you for ripping my heart apart.
Thank you for turning your back to me.
Thank you for killing me.
You are my Death.
You are my Killer.
My Murderer.
Thank you.
Thank you for abandoning me.
XXX
Okay...this was seriously hard to write.
These are true events. The boy. The...razor...not the arranged marriage.
The fight, the hate. Mostly all of it was true.
It really hurt to write this and i'm about to cry...
This was inspired by the true events and the song Fields of hope from Gundam SEED Destiny...
R&R...
Owari...