I looked to the wall where the inscription made of blood was written. The place where the door to purgatory was supposed to open, but instead it had opened a few hours earlier. Then the god-forsaken souls took a hold of my angel. He had started the journey with good intentions, but those monstrous souls corrupted him. They made him turn on me and the three men who considered him family. The sweet angel I love was just standing before me saying that he was God. No, he is not God. He is still Castiel, right? He will come back, right?
I still remember, clear as day, the night I met Cas. I had been performing in a run-down tavern that was at the end of its days and I was at the end of my rope. My gig as a singer was bringing in the cash, but my job as a hunter was getting to me. I had just finished a hunt in a little town in Illinois and, though I had killed it, the djinn had killed two kids before I could take it out. That fact alone threw me into chaos.
After I finished my number, I went to the bar and ordered vodka on the rocks. I sat down and, without paying attention to my surroundings, I began to pray aloud. "God, I have never questioned you before, but why have you forsaken me?" I asked slamming my head onto the counter.
"He hasn't." Came a clipped reply. I looked to my left to find a scruffy looking guy in a trench coat drinking a Disaronno on the rocks.
"How do you know?" I asked still looking him over. He looked about 6 foot and around 30 years old if I was right.
"God forsakes none of his children." The deep voice replied, wavering as if he was trying to convince himself rather than me.
"I hope you're right." I sighed. Looking him over once more, I made the best decision I could have ever made: I introduced myself. "My name is Artemis, what's yours?"
He looked at the hand I had extended and then returned to his drink. "I am Castiel." He said before taking another sip of his drink. I withdrew my hand feeling a bit awkward.
"So, Castiel, what brings you to this part of town?" At the confused look I was getting, I decided to elaborate. "Judging by the tax accountant get up, you don't normally come to little beat up bars like this." I said trying to make some sort of conversation.
"I do not see how this liquor store is 'beat up' and I do not see how everyone thinks I am a tax accountant." He said as serious as the night is long.
"Liquor store? This is a bar." I said genuinely confused. Just then the bartender came up with my drink laughing.
"I'd cut him some slack. He's had 17 Disaronno's plus 10 whiskey shots. It's all just starting to hit 'em." He said before handing me my drink and walking away.
"Holy Hell! How are you not tits up on the ground?" I practically screamed.
He looked up at me with the same subtle confusion as before. "Hell is not holy and I do not understand what 'tits up' entails." He said. Wow. Was this guy for real?
"Ok, never mind all that. Where are you from?" I asked trying to figure him out.
"Somewhere far away." He replied shortly. Great, drunk and suspicious.
"Well, do you have a family?" I tried again. "Yes." There was something to work with!
"What are they like?" I asked.
"My brothers are creating bloodshed over my father's will." What kind of family is this? Well, this was getting me nowhere fast.
"What do you do?" I said switching subjects.
"I am a warrior." Now that was something I could relate to.
"Me too. There's something we have in common." I said. He looked into my eyes and it seemed as if he looked straight into my past. He was about to say something when he paused and groaned.
"You have a pleasant voice compared to others." He said rolling his eyes.
"Thanks, I guess." I responded confused.
"I must go." He said getting up and before I could protest he was gone. It was odd and I always told myself that I was hearing things, but I could have sworn I heard the flapping of wings.
I had never forgotten him, but life went on. It wasn't until a year later that I saw him again. I had been tracking a windigo for about a month before I finally was able to confront it. Unfortunately I hadn't been ready and gotten severely injured before I could kill it. I knew I couldn't go to a hospital, so I started to head to a friend that I hadn't seen in 10 years. I pulled into my old, beat up Mustang into the junkyard and knocked on the old farm house's door. When the door opened, I saw the gruff, old man I have been dying to see.
"Uncle Bobby!" I yelled throwing my arms around.
"What in tarnation?!" He said pulling me off him. "Who are… Artemis?" He asked recognizing me.
"It's m—" I was cut off by the holy water being splashed in my face. "I'm not a demon , Bobby." I said. When I went to take a step inside, a flare of pain went up my side, reminding me why I was here. "I need some help." I said showing him the claw-shaped gashes in my right side.
"Geez, get in here, you idgit." He said pulling in side.
As, Bobby was fixing me up, we caught up on the times. I found out Uncle John was dead, but his two boys, Dean and Sam, took over hunting. Ellen and Jo had died as well, but Rufus was alive and well. They had a new ally, an angel that had helped them stop Lucifer and Michael from bringing about the apocalypse. Knowing that Lucifer had been free explained why there had been so many demons out and about.
Bobby was almost done when a guy came up the stairs from what seemed to be a basement. He was probably about 6'2" with light blue eyes, sandy brown hair, and a 4 o'clock shadow that gave him the "I'm dangerous" attractiveness, though it seemed like he hadn't slept and was running on empty. "Dean, how's Sam doing?" Bobby asked finishing up my patch job.
"Who's this?" Dean asked in a nonchalance that obviously said "I don't trust you".
"She's an old friend of mine. Now, answer the question." Bobby said gruffly.
Dean looked me over and replied. "He hasn't changed. I'm gonna call Cas." He said. Bobby nodded his agreement. "Before I do, I would like to know who you are." Dean said glaring at me. I am never one to back down from a challenge, so I stood to his level, despite the pain, and I introduced myself.
"My name is Artemis Portukalos, I knew your father. I'm sorry to hear about his passing." I said as a pang of sadness rang through me thinking about Uncle John.
"Ha! Knew him? He practically raised you." Bobby said with a huff.
"Raised you?" Dean looked to me questioningly.
"Well, he, along with Bobby, was the closest things I had to a father. My parents were killed by a demon when I was eight years-old. John burst in the door as the demon was coming after me and exorcised it. I scooped me up and brought me here, where he explained to me that monsters were real but there was a way to kill them. I stayed here with Bobby for a few years and learned how to hunt and to fight. Every few weeks Uncle John would come by to make sure I wasn't running Bobby into the ground. I even went on a couple of hunts with him. Once they decided I was ready, I went off to live with a trusted family and grew up as normal as possible. I just started hunting again two years ago and I have never looked back." I said giving Dean my life story.
"Wow, so Dad had another kid and neither of you told us." Dean said glaring at Bobby.
"Watch it, boy. She isn't your sister. She is just a stray that couldn't be left. No offense." Bobby finished throwing an apologetic look my way.
"Hey, none taken." I said throwing up my hands.
"Alright, enough, we don't have time for this." Dean said walking into the middle of the room. "Cas, I need your help with Sam!" Dean projected. Suddenly, Castiel appeared behind him.
"You! You're an angel?" I said shocked to see my tax accountant from the bar. He turned around to see to face me, showing a subtle look of shock.
"Artemis. It is good to see you well." Castiel said nodding a greeting.
"So, you two know each other then?" Dean asked rather annoyed.
"He was at a bar that I was working at about a year ago." I snipped at Dean. I looked into Castiel's eyes and was able to see the faint glow of his grace. I began to relax just holding his gaze, but Mr. Sunshine began talking.
"Cas! I need help with Sam." Dean said.
"I heard your prayer, Dean. What did you do?" Castiel said narrowing his eyes to the point that I would have been scared if I hadn't grown up a hunter. Dean didn't answer; he just led Cas down to the basement.
"What was that about?" I asked looking to Bobby.
As it turns out, Sam had been pulled out of Hell without his soul and Dean had Death, the Horseman, return it. The bad part was that his soul had been shredded in the pit, so it was conflicting with his psyche. All of this causing a dispute between Dean and Cas. Castiel had said not to give Sam his soul back because he knew it could hurt him, but Dean didn't listen.
After seeing how much Bobby had to do for the other hunters and what he does for the boys, I decided to stay around. Come to find out that Bobby and I could rule the world if we tried. Bobby would man the Federal phones and I would help out hunters with research on my cell phone. We both had to try hard not to laugh at each other, though sometimes in vain. I got to meet Sam, who was such a gentle giant considering his situation, and once I got to talk with Dean more I realized that he was a male version of me.
After a while, I found myself playing a role in their game of house. Bobby had become more like my father each day and Sam and Dean were the two brothers I never got to have. Unfortunately, my brothers were often away on hunts, leave Dad and I to manage ourselves.
My favorite times, as good as the rest were, were the times when Castiel came around. Granted, the only times he was called was in dire situations, but just seeing him was, I don't know, nice. It wasn't much later that Cas wasn't coming around anymore, so one night I got up the nerve to call him myself.
"Castiel? I don't know if you can hear me, bu—" I didn't even need to finish my request before he appeared in front of me.
"What is it? Is Sam and Dean alright?" He asked looking around the library for trouble.
"Oh! Nothing is wrong. We are all fine." I said flushing as I realized that I had called him there with no purpose in mind.
"Then, why have you called me here?" He asked in his normal expressionless nonchalance. Before I could think of a fake reason the truth came flying out.
"I just missed you." I said as my shoulders sagged. He seemed slight taken back, but quickly recovered.
"I am fighting a war in Heaven. I do not have time for unnecessary trips to Earth." He scolded.
"Right." I said as my ego deflated even more. What was I thinking? I had known that Castiel was busy, but I just needed to see him.
Something in his demeanor changed then and he spoke a bit softer. "How is it that you fix 'missing someone'" He asked. I looked up to him, shocked that he was still here let alone still talking to me.
"Well, I suppose that merely seeing someone, talking with them, can help." I said, but the more that I talked with him the more I realized that I wanted to more than just talk with him.
"Artemis, I cannot stay from heaven long, you may call me when you are 'missing' me." He said matter-of-factly. I smiled.
"Thank you, Cas." He merely nodded then he disappeared. As he left, I heard his wings and my smile grew wider. "So, I wasn't crazy after all." I thought aloud.
"You certainly got his attention." A deep voice said from behind.
"You should know better than to sneak up behind a hunter, Dean." I said turning to face him.
"Listen, Arty, if you're crushing on feathers, you may as well forget it." Dean said taking a few steps toward me.
"Oh? And why is that?" I asked keeping my guard up. "You heard him. With the war in Heaven he can't focus on anything else. Plus, he's and angel he won't be able to have a normal relationship." Dean snipped growing more animalistic, which warned me of his temper.
My bad-ass attitude began to falter as what Dean was saying began to sink in. What was it that I thought I wanted? Did I want a relationship with Cas? What did I want? Before anymore questions could swirl into my head, Dean put his hands on my shoulders and stooped to eye-level with me. "I just don't want to see you hurt," He said his voice low, but his tone firm. "I think of you as family. You are my sister now and I'll be damned if I let you hurt yourself."
I took in Dean's words, hugged him, told him thank you, and then went to figure out what my wants were. Though my efforts were in vain, I did realize that I did want to see Castiel, so every now and then I would call him. We would talk for a few moments the he would have to leave. After a while, I didn't have to call him anymore.
After Eve, the mother of all demons, was released from purgatory and we began to find what purgatory actually was, Cas ways always around. They guys were actually able to kill Eve quickly, but she wasn't the villain of this story. Though the more Cas was around the more I saw a change in him. That change became more apparent when an old foe, Crowley, began to shows signs of coming back into the apocalypse game. Even Sam and Bobby the change in Cas. One night, they confronted Dean with their fears. After awhile, Dean stopped the conversation by reminding them that Cas had always had been there for them. He was even there for me when I came into the picture. But no matter how confident Dean sounded, I could tell that even he was worried.
For a few days after that, things were going great, Eve was dead and the door to purgatory was safe, or so we thought. Then everything went to crap again. We got wind that Cas was working with Crowley, so the guys set a trap for him. Dean called him and then Sam lit a ring of holy fire. Cas confessed to be working with Crowley to open the door so he could use the souls trapped in purgatory to make himself more powerful. "You should have come to us, Cas" Dean said his eyes showing betrayal.
"Maybe." Cas replied. Then we all heard a rumbling alerting us to the demons that were on their way. "It's too late. I can't turn back now. I can't."
"It's not too late. Damn it, Cas, we can fix this!" Dean said trying to make him see that we were here to help him.
"Dean, it's not broken!" Cas said. He looked out the window where we could see the demonic cloud heading our way. "Run. You have to run. Run now!"
We all headed for the door, but Dean and I paused in the threshold after Sam and Bobby. We looked back at Cas, surrounded by holy fire, looking after us with hurt eyes. Leaving him like that hurt Dean, I know, and it broke my heart.
Later, at Bobby's, no matter how hard I tried to sleep, I kept seeing Castiel trapped in the holy fire. I tried to shut my eyes for the tenth time, but snapped them right back open when I heard a rustle in the dark bed room. I looked up to find Castiel standing, dimly lit by the moonlight shining through the window. "Are against me as well?" He said with his expression guarded and his stare intense. I thought for a moment about what to say, not wanting to scare him away.
"Castiel," I began rising from the bed. "I will never be against you, but I do advise against your plan." I saw Cas' posture relax a fraction, but his guard did not falter.
"I will not deter from this path." He said sounding much like the way he did the first night I met him, trying to convince himself of the fact instead of me.
"I know." I said with a sad smile. "Just know that I will be here should something go wrong." Almost his entire guard came crumbling down. "God created friends for three reasons: to talk you out of doing stupid shit, to do stupid shit with you, or to pick your ass up of the ground when you do stupid shit and it goes wrong." I said with a genuine smile.
He tilted his head and gave a puppy dog face, showing his confusion, and then a small smile graced his lips. I was so entranced in his smile that I didn't notice that Cas had leaned in and captured my rough lips in his own. When I didn't respond he tried to pull away, but I pulled out of my shock just in time to grab his trench coat and deepen the kiss. We were both clumsy and uncoordinated, but neither of us were complaining. After a few moments, I pushed off his trench coat. Once it was on the floor he began maneuvering us back towards the bed until it hit the back of my knees. He lightly pushed my shoulders down, so I took the hint and laid down. Once he settled on top of me, the rest of the clothes began coming off.
It's interesting to be able to say that my first was with an angel, but I know that had I been with anyone else it wouldn't have been right. Afterwards, I stayed wrapped in his arms with a death grip on his shoulder. As my mind kept trying to jump into oblivion, my grip would only grow tighter. "Don't worry. I will be here when you wake." Cas said with amusement lacing his deep voice. I felt comfort in his words and allowed myself to fall into sweet darkness.
The next morning, I found Castiel still laying next to me, but now he is fully dressed. When he saw I was awake he stood from the bed and told me he had to see to preparations. It made me sad that he was still going through with Operation: Purgatory, but I knew last night that he wasn't going to change his mind. "I love you, Cas." I said sitting up holding the sheet to my chest. "I will always be here for you." He kissed the sad smile away from my lips and then flew away leaving a black feather in his wake.
Even though I knew that Cas was about to do something stupid, I was still happy. I loved an angel and my angel loved me. Unfortunately, my happiness was short lived when we found that one of Bobby's friends was kidnapped by Crowley. We left to find her in an ally way covered in blood. She told us that she was able to hold her ground until Castiel began questioning her. My head began reeling. There was only two days until Cas and Crowley could open the door. Then Cas appeared behind us and began warning us not to interfere. Before I could say anything, Dean spoke up and said that he would do anything to stop him. Cas looked at Dean than went over to Sam and touched his forehead. That one little touched caused Sam's wall to come down and he fell into a coma. Dean and I rushed to Sam. "Cas, what have you done?" I said looking to the angel. He left us to take Sam and Bobby's friend home.
Dean was going up the walls seeing Sam in this condition and I don't blame him. It was then that it was decided that I was going in Sam's place. We packed up, Dean left a note for Sam saying where we would be, and we went to Crowley's hideout.
When we arrived, Cas was nowhere to be seen, but a black woman was standing in his place. I found out that woman was Raphael and somehow she was now working with Crowley. We tried to stop them from completing the ritual, but we failed. The ritual didn't work though. Castiel appeared behind us, saying that he stole the real virgin blood and performed the ritual earlier. Raphael was skeptic, so Cas gave us a glimpse of his grace. It was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen. Castiel giving of a light that rivaled that of the sun. Then Crowley escaped and Raphael begged for mercy, only to have Cas disintegrate her in an explosion of blood. That image alone made my stomach turn.
Then Cas turned to us with a sinister feel to his aura that we all felt. He began talking of us doubting him when we should have trusted him. When he began to approach us, Sam came out of nowhere and stabbed him in the back with an angel blade. I screamed out, but when I looked the angel blade had not affected him. he just pulled out the blade and said the words that will forever haunt my dreams. "An angel blade will not work on me, because I am no longer an angel. I am your new God. Now bow before me and proclaim your love for me." Everything else went by in a blur. One second Cas was here, saying that he was God, and the next he was gone.
That is where I am now, sitting in shock, not wanting to believe that my angel was one of the bad guys. Becoming numb while Dean's advice began to ring in my ear. I couldn't even feel when Bobby picked me up off the ground. It wasn't until I saw Sam and Dean that I realized I had to stay strong. Sam was sick and Dean was hurting, I had to be there for them. As we left the blood covered room, I looked back saying a silent prayer to my lost angel.
"I love you, Cas. I will always be here for you."