This story is a translation of Sydney8201's Through the darkness.

Author's notes:

Hello,

Here's the new story I want to share with you.

This story is different from the previous one, darker and harder.

I hope you'll like it. Be careful it will contain sex, scenes of torture and Alastair... I guess that says it all right?

I wish you a good reading and hope that many of you will read and comment it!

Sydney8201

Chapter's music:

Wake me up by Avicii

Chapter 1: The hitchhiker

"The stranger might be a friend you don't know yet"

Unknown

Castiel was driving for hours already and he was getting seriously tired. Yet he didn't intend to stop soon. He intended to put a maximum distance between himself and the city he had just left. Distance between himself and his family.

He sincerely loved his parents. He loved each of his brothers and sisters. He had every reason to be happy. But he had more and more difficulties to bear them. He needed to take a little time for himself and take stock of what he wanted to do with his life.

At the age of twenty-two, Castiel was still totally lost on this last point. He had a degree in hand, could continue in this path and become a doctor like his father. But that was what his parents expected from him. And it certainly wasn't what he wanted to do. He liked the idea of helping people. But he hated the idea of being a doctor only to satisfy the ambitions of his relatives. All of his brothers had prestigious jobs. Luke was a lawyer. Michael was a surgeon and Uriel ran his own publishing house. Anna had opted for the music, to the great displeasure of their parents, but she had rapidly become one of the greatest pianists of her generation and their father was proud of her. Gabriel had been the only one to refuse to follow the path that was laid out for him. He had never been one to obey the orders of their parents. And he had quickly been excluded of their lives and their inheritance. Last he had heard, he was a pastry chef at a Chicago restaurant. He no longer called any of their family members since his departure three years ago and Castiel had some news from him by email when his brother was in the mood to give him some. He knew Gabriel was right for having left. It was obvious today for Castiel that his big brother was the one who had had more courage. At the time, however, he had said the opposite. He had accused him of betraying their family, betraying their parents and being a coward. They had argued but had stayed in touch. After all, they had always been extremely close.

And now that Castiel was determined to take things in hand, he counted on the help of Gabriel to find his niche. He hadn't yet advised his brother of his imminent arrival but sincerely hoped that he would agree to accommodate him for a while. So that he fall on his feet and finally find something he would want to do.

Castiel's father had yelled at him when he had learnt his desire to get away from the family home where he was still living at the age of twenty two. He hadn't asked for his opinion before giving up on re-enrolling to complete his curriculum. He had graduated four years after leaving high school, got exceptional grades at the MCAT and earned the right to enter one of the most prestigious medical school of the country. But just when completing his registration, he had realized that he was boarding for four academic years more and at least two more years before being able to practice. He couldn't see himself spending all that time studying for the right to practice a job he didn't like. He needed to ask the right questions to himself and decide what he really wanted to do with his life. No matter that it cost him the affection of his parents and the financial security of the Novak family. He wanted to live his life as he pleased, and already knew he could count on Gabriel to teach him what it really meant.

But for now, Castiel wanted to drive above all. He had a whole year to decide his own future, some money aside and a car in perfect working order. A little journey across the United States seemed the best solution. Visit some known places before taking the road to Chicago. It was his only plan for the coming months and that was exactly what he needed.

Castiel knew he was probably a huge disappointment for his parents at that very moment. He had never wanted to get there even if he had always known that this was how it would end. He had never been really honest with them and he knew that if he had been from the beginning he would have been kicked out earlier. Not because he didn't want to become a doctor. Not only because of that. But mainly because he had always known, certainly since the beginning of puberty, that he was gay.

He knew exactly what his parents thought of homosexuals. He had heard them talk about it during dinner sometimes. They thought it was a deviance, a sin and a disease that was urgent to treat. They associated homosexuality and perversion, and Castiel would be no exception. This was what had led him to deny his preferences for a long time. What had led him to only have a few experiences with passing men of which he spoke to no one. What had led him to lie to his parents and to hide to be himself. But now that he was alone and determined to live his life as he pleased, he had no intention of hiding. He was going to tell everything to Gabriel. He was going to meet a man and be happy. No matter what his parents would think of him eventually. He loved them but they would have to accept him as he was or lose him. The ball was in their court.

Castiel stifled a yawn and changed the radio station to get music. He was driving without quite knowing the direction he had taken. He had no specific purpose and he loved this uncertainty that made him feel truly free for the first time in his life. He knew he was traveling north but he hadn't paid attention to the signs. He would stop when he wouldn't be able to drive longer without it being dangerous. He would drive until nearly falling asleep behind the wheel. He could do it. He had no one to order him to turn back. No one to tell him again and again that he was about to ruin his life.

Castiel began to sing over the music by beating time with his fingertips on the steering wheel. There was no one but him on the road and he was driving a little above the speed limit. The window was open, the warm air of late summer lashing his face. It was like living a waking dream. It was exciting and scary at the same time. It was his life now.

The young man felt a smile stretching his lips while the song was changing on the radio. He didn't know the next one but he continued nonetheless to follow the rhythm with his fingertips. He blinked several times when the sun began to go down into his field of vision. He released the wheel to catch his sunglasses and put them on his nose, keeping his eyes fixed on the road ahead. He had brought with him the bare necessities. Some clothes and his toiletries kit. He didn't need more for this new beginning. And he hadn't wanted to stay too long at home, under the disapproving eyes of his parents.

Castiel glanced at his watch. It was late afternoon and he was starting to get hungry. He had no idea of the nearest town or the number of miles that separated him from the nearest restaurant. He sighed and then observed the landscape around him. He was on a country road, straight and wide, surrounded by trees and fields. It was a beautiful and wild landscape. A landscape that completely tallied with the state of mind of the young man. He smiled even more while accelerating significantly. He could stop at the next town and have a snack before hitting the road. He could stop at a motel for the night. He could do exactly what he wanted. No one would judge him.

Castiel changed the radio station again when statics began to punctuate the songs on the one he had chosen a few minutes earlier. He had some difficulties in finding one that was broadcasting anything other than country music. When he finally managed to, he began to sing his head off. Everything was perfect.

The young man was totally absorbed by the music and the road that seemed to extend endlessly in front of him and was surprised when he saw a figure on the roadside at a hundred yards away. Castiel immediately slowed down. He remembered too well the accidents which people spoke of regularly on TV. People knocked over by drivers who didn't see fit to slow down when seeing them and ended up swerving on the road, costing their lives. Thus he pressed the brake violently as he approached the figure before him.

When he was close enough to see the person who was walking, he figured out that it was a man. He was walking at a rapid pace and had his arm stretched to his left, his thumb up. He was hitchhiking. Castiel wondered how he could have gotten there on foot while the latter city that the young man had already gone through was dozens of miles behind him. Perhaps his previous driver had dumped him here. Or maybe he came from another road Castiel wouldn't have seen. The young man frowned and without really realizing it stopped beside the hitchhiker. He knew it wasn't wise. He was alone in the middle of nowhere and this man could well be a killer in search of his next victim. But Castiel felt optimistic and in the mood to help anyone who needed to. He refused to let that person walk for hours under that blazing sun. He would eventually dehydrate and die on this road where obviously nobody ever passed.

Castiel engaged the handbrake and lowered the window. The hitchhiker turned to him, but kept his distance. The young man couldn't see his face but he guessed he had to be young. Probably his age. He had an old backpack, was wearing jeans worn at the knees and a sweatshirt of which the hood was up on his head probably to protect himself from the sun.

"Can I take you somewhere?" Castiel asked, leaning to see the stranger through the passenger window.

The latter seemed to hesitate to approach but eventually came to lean on the windowsill. He didn't remove his hood and his face was obscured by the shadow of the fabric. Castiel however kept staring at him, waiting for his answer. He should probably have been afraid of the attitude of this man but he felt strangely comfortable in his presence. He had no idea the why of this feeling.

"Where are you going?" Asked the stranger whose hands were now joined inside the car, his elbows still firmly rested on the windowsill.

It was a good question, to which Castiel had no answer. He was driving without a goal since he had left home. He had no clue where he was. He was unable to give a precise destination.

"No idea." He then admitted sincerely.

The stranger didn't seem perturbed by the response. He nodded slowly.

"OK, works for me. No matter where you drop me, it'll still be better than here." He said.

He then straightened to remove the bag from his back and opened the door. He then slipped inside the car and put his bag on the floor between his feet. Castiel looked at him for a second longer, unable to see his face with that damn hood, before pulling back the handbrake and getting back on the road.

"I'm Castiel." He finally launched by way of introduction.

If he had to ride with a passenger for an indefinite time, he preferred to know his first name. Beside him, the stranger's face was turned towards the window and seemed fascinated by the landscape that was passing before his eyes. Which was obviously surprising since it was the same he had had ample opportunity to observe by walking along this road.

"Dean." He finally said without looking at Castiel.

The young man substantially lowered the volume of the radio to be able to discuss freely with his passenger. He was sweating profusely with the heat and despite the open window, and he suspected that Dean was uncomfortable with a sweatshirt and a hood. Moreover the fact that he still hadn't removed it put Castiel unease. He had the feeling that his passenger had something to hide. Could it be that he was disfigured or covered with scars? Castiel shivered.

"What were you doing on the roadside?" The young man asked, pressing the steering wheel in his hands.

Dean groaned a second before sighing.

"Walkin'." He simply answered.

He seemed definitely not willing to discuss. His tone wasn't rude but his answer indicated that he didn't want to go on about the subject. Castiel knew it was definitely not a good sign but he preferred to think it was prudence on the part of the passenger. After all, they didn't know each other and Dean wasn't obliged to answer his questions. Although Castiel would have much preferred him to do.

"Oh… and for a long time?" The young man then asked because he had never been able to silence his obsessive curiosity.

This had made him an excellent pupil and a brilliant student. But it had often complicated his interactions with people. Nobody liked to be questioned of the sort. And Dean probably was no exception.

"For a few hours… three or four I guess… I lost my watch. The person who had picked me before must have had enough of the company. He left me on the roadside. I just kept walking."

Castiel couldn't help but wonder what had led the previous driver to drop Dean in a deserted place like this. He sincerely hoped that this person was not currently dead in a ditch, killed by the hand of his passenger. He hoped to not have made a mistake by picking him up. He bit his lower lip for a second and was surprised when Dean finally spoke again.

"So, what 'bout you?" He asked.

Castiel cast a glance at Dean and saw that he was still looking through the window the trees that passed before his eyes. Castiel wanted to snatch his hood and finally put a face on this deep and sensual voice. He wanted to see the features of the man he had agreed to get into his car. But he refused to ask him. He suspected that this may seem rude.

"How is it that you're driving without knowing in which direction? You just took your car and decided to drive without bothering to choose a destination?"

That was exactly what Castiel had done. He knew it might seem odd to anyone who didn't know him and didn't know what kind of parents he had. But he didn't care what people might think of him. He was happy on the road. Happy to be away from home and away from his family. He didn't need anything more.

"More or less, yes… I just needed to take off to clear my mind. What about you? You have a specific destination that you have to get to?"

Dean didn't answer immediately and Castiel attempted a new glance in his direction. His passenger was looking straight ahead now but the young man still couldn't see his face. His arms were crossed on his chest, his hands half buried in the sleeves of his sweatshirt. He had long and fine fingers. Elegants. Castiel tore himself away from his contemplation to focus on the road.

"Not really… I just like traveling… get around a bit and enjoy all that the US have to offer in terms of landscapes. I just forgot this kind of stuff was easier when you have a car."

Castiel assented. He was surprised to find that his passenger had more or less the same purpose as himself. This meant they could well hit the road together for a while. Unless Dean had lied to him and intended to cut him into pieces shortly. After all, he could well be a multi-recidivist murderer on the lam. The young man attempted to remember if he had seen a prison on the road but he hadn't paid enough attention to his surroundings to know with certainty. This could cost him his life now. He took a quick look at Dean's bag and wondered if it contained knives and firearms. Or even other torture tools like one saw in the movies. He swallowed hard.

"I thought for a time to go to Los Angeles. I've often been told that I could make money by posing for fashion photos… but I don't want to end up as an actor in a porn movie like all these desperate girls you see in reports about Hollywood."

Castiel frowned. If Dean was indeed so sure that he could become a model, he definitely had no reason to hide his face under his hood. And this seemed to prove that he was definitely not disfigured.

"But you know, I don't want to put pressure on you or anything… you can drop me off at the next town or even here if you want. I'm just glad I could rest my legs a few minutes." Dean explained after a few seconds.

Castiel immediately shook his head. The company didn't bother him. Actually, he rather liked the idea of doing part of the ride with someone at his side. He liked to discuss. He liked to ask questions and preferred by far to do it with someone rather than alone. But he couldn't help thinking that Dean was hiding something.

"I don't mind taking you with me." He explained squeezing a bit more tightly the steering wheel in his hands. "Actually, I'm pretty happy to have someone to talk to. We can spend a bit of time together and see where it leads us. I'm in no hurry and obviously you either."

"In this case thank you Cas."

The nickname considerably surprised the young man but he kept it for him. In his family, they didn't have a habit of shortening his first name. Only Gabriel refused to use his whole name. He had acquired the habit to call him Cassie. Which the young man hated at the highest point. But to his surprise, he quite liked 'Cas'. It was short and simple. He knew that 'Castiel' wasn't a common name and people had often made fun of him about it at school. He had eventually gotten used to it.

"Aren't you hot with your sweater?" He asked when the silence became heavy and his curiosity literally suffocating.

Dean approached a hand to his face and passed it under the hood, probably to wipe his face. Castiel watched him for a second before returning his attention to the road.

"A bit yeah." Dean finally conceded.

He pulled his hand from under his hood and leaned forward. For a second, Castiel had the feeling he was going to open his bag, and he couldn't help but significantly move away from him until his arm was pressed against the door. If the young man pulled a knife out, he had no chance to get out of that car alive. He didn't picture himself jumping from the vehicle still in motion and survive like all these guys did in the action movies that Gabriel loved. He would end up stabbed or run over on the road. He had no idea what he preferred. However, he was relieved when he saw that his passenger didn't open his bag and simply grabbed the edge of his sweater to remove it. Castiel couldn't help observing the belly skin of Dean, slightly visible where his shirt had risen along his sweater. The young man immediately looked away and forced himself to watch the tar in front of the car.

"I hate the heat… I hate the sun… I was afraid to get a heatstroke or a sunburn by staying too exposed to sunlight." Dean said then.

Castiel appreciably slowed down to again conform to the speed limit and then cast a quick glance to his passenger. Dean had removed his sweater and had rolled it into a ball on his lap. And he was not disfigured. Far from it. To tell the truth, he wasn't mistaken in thinking that he could earn money by posing for photographers. Because he was literally to die for. His face was fine and his features as drawn by the hand of an artist. His nose was straight, his jaw firm and covered with a thin designer stubble. His hair was light brown and pointing in all directions on the top of his head. He had green eyes and a myriad of freckles over his cheeks and nose. But what captivated Castiel were his lips. They were fleshy and feminine. Of a pale pink, they would probably have made many women green with envy. Castiel was fascinated by his lips. And he had the greatest difficulty in the world to break away from his contemplation and focus again on the road ahead. He didn't want to have an accident because he hadn't enough control over himself not to drool over a handsome man. He doubted his insurance accept this excuse and reimburse him if he crashed into a tree.

"So Cas, obviously you don't know where you're going but I guess you know where you come from right?" Dean asked, turning completely to his companion.

The young man could feel the sweat running down his neck and down his back, sticking his shirt uncomfortably against his skin. He wanted a shower. Preferably cold. And of course it had nothing to do with the gorgeous man who was on his right. At least that was what he was going to keep saying to himself.

"Palm Springs, Florida. You?"

Dean shrugged, clutching his sweater in his hands. Castiel wanted to withdraw his question immediately. He could feel that his companion didn't want to talk about himself. But he anyway considered having the right to know a minimum. He had agreed to drive the young man for a part of the way and he needed to have some informations about him. He wouldn't seek to know very personal details. Just the basics. Enough to stop thinking he might be a killer on the run.

"From here and there… in fact, I never had any ties. But I was born in Kansas… Lawrence to be precise. I lived there for four years and this is the place where I stayed the longest."

Castiel wanted to ask him why. He wanted to know what could have led the young man to travel so much. But he refrained himself. Perhaps he could ask more questions when they would know each other a little better. He contented himself with nodding and watching the road straight ahead.

"Okay, next question…" Dean said cheerfully. "What are you running away from, Cas?"

Castiel felt a chill run down his spine when he heard the young man's question. He knew the fact that he drives aimlessly was strange but he hadn't thought that his companion could have so quickly seen right through him. Above all, he hadn't imagined that he would ask the question when they hardly knew each other.

"What makes you think I'm running away from something?" He retorted.

Dean threw his sweatshirt over his shoulder in the back seat and stretched his legs in front of him as best as he could in the confined space of the car. He put his arm through the window and kept it outstretched, the air crashing into his hand. He seemed carefree at this moment, calm and happy. Castiel found the expression on his face fascinating and he cursed himself for having to drive and look ahead. He would have liked to observe him for several minutes to try to unravel the mystery that he represented. For he knew that there were things to know about his passenger. Things he would have really liked to discover but he doubted to know some day. They weren't friends. Would never be and they would eventually split sooner or later.

"All those who drive aimlessly like you are running away from something… or someone." Dean finally explained while observing his hand and turning it to change the angle at which the wind lashed it.

Castiel sighed deeply. He didn't necessarily want to talk about his family and go into the details of his story with someone he didn't know. But he wasn't opposed to the idea of elaborate a little. He had nothing to hide.

"I'm avoiding the plans that my family has done for me. And you, what are you running away from?"

Dean groaned again one second and then returned his hand inside the car to observe it carefully. Castiel gave him time to answer.

"I avoid responsibilities… I avoid stability. I avoid the normal life everyone dreams about." His passenger finally explained.

Castiel nodded. They were a bit alike on this point. He could understand how easy it was to have the sensation of suffocating when you complied with what the world, family and society expected of you. Sometimes it was easier to follow the rules but it was much more pleasant to turn your back on it and throw yourself into the unknown. To live your life. To enjoy.

"It's a good thing we came across each other then." Castiel commented, smiling again. "We could run away together."

He realized the double meaning of his words just as they crossed the line of his lips. He lost his smile immediately and began to bite his lower lip. He had no idea how Dean would react to his words and the innuendo he hadn't deliberately sought to do. Even if the idea of spending time with the young man didn't displease him.

"Okay but if and only if you let me drive occasionally." Dean replied after long seconds of silence.

Castiel straightaway felt relief engulf him and his smile return strongly. He had the feeling he had just committed in the long term with his passenger and the fact that it was the first time he would be with someone other than a family member for so long made him ecstatic. He didn't know Dean. He didn't know anything about him. He could well be someone dangerous and decided to harm him. But he was very handsome, obviously funny and carefree. And he was all Castiel needed to have fun during this little trip. The young man had never had any romantic or even friendly relationship with someone. He had never been able to fit in the schools he had attended. He was too weird, too curious and too talkative. He was always among the best students and he was the one people mocked more often. He had slept with a few men but had never gone out with any. And he refused to go out with a woman. He had been alone the majority of the time. Which might seem paradoxical for someone who had been raised in a family with six children. Dean looked like all these boys for whom he had had crushes back in school time. All these football players, popular and idolized who regularly took a dislike to him and took delight in heckle him to make others laugh. He was just like those men Castiel admired out of the corner of his eye, dreaming of accost them but never having the courage to. He was inaccessible in the eyes of Castiel. But he was there. He was sitting in the car of the young man and he seemed determined to do a part of the way with him. It was like a dream. A revenge on life.

"That's conceivable… but only if you can prove to me that you have your driver's license. I refuse to leave my car in the hands of anybody… I don't even have your full name." Castiel said, casting a glance at Dean.

His passenger nodded, then reached into the back pocket of his jeans one second before pulling out his license and shake it proudly in front of him.

"Dean Winchester, twenty years old and holder of a driving license for four years." He announced, pointedly sticking his chest out.

Castiel couldn't help laughing for a second. He found his passenger funny. And he could easily picture himself traveling long miles with him and never get bored. He had never done anything out of the ordinary. He hadn't done anything extravagant. He had lived in a protected and secure environment. He had never been drunk, had never touched drugs and had never been out until the early hours of the morning. He intended to make up for lost time now that he was free. And he hoped that Dean was ready to show him some of these things. He smiled when he saw the young man get out a pack of cigarettes from his jeans pocket.

"Mind if I smoke?" He asked, switching the cigarette lighter between Castiel and himself.

The young man shook his head then watched out of the corner of his eye Dean imprison a cigarette between his lips and light it with the cigarette lighter. He was fascinated for a few seconds by the way the young man's mouth had closed around the filter. He shook his head slightly to break away from his contemplation and then realized he still hadn't given his full name to his passenger.

"By the way, I'm Castiel Novak, twenty-two years old and obviously also holder of a driving license."

Dean laughed too before getting rid of the ash from his cigarette through the open window. He then took a new drag that he exhaled by the nose. He seemed more relaxed now. Castiel then realized that he must have had the same fears than him when accepting a ride in this car. He knew nothing of the man who was driving, nothing of his motivations or the things he had in mind by picking him up. After all, Castiel might have wanted to hurt him.

"You know what? You're a blessing! No kidding Cas… without you, I probably would have had to walk for hours under that damn scorching sun. I woulda gone nuts!" Dean told, once again getting rid of the ashes from his cigarette through the window.

Castiel hadn't seen any other car since he had taken this route and he could easily imagine Dean waiting for hours and hours without anyone stopping by. He was really happy to have stopped. He was glad to have taken this road without noticing.

"The person who left you there is quite simply irresponsible and cruel. They should have known that they were making you run a significant risk." Castiel responded.

Dean ended his cigarette silently before discarding the butt outside. He then let his hand into the wind once again and waved his fingers, obviously amused or fascinated by the feeling that it brought him. Castiel had rather the feeling that he wanted to avoid answering the inherent question. He didn't like that.

"Dean?!" He called out to draw the attention of his passenger.

The latter brought his arm inside and turned to Castiel. He crossed his arms over his chest and sighed deeply.

"Actually, I was the one who asked to get out if you want to know." He explained calmly.

"Oh and… can I ask you why?"

Dean ran a hand through his hair then looked at his bag which was still at his feet. For a second, Castiel really wondered what had lead his companion to leave the safety of a vehicle to try his luck on foot. But he wouldn't push the young man to answer him if indeed he refused to do so. He had no right to force him to talk.

"He was wrong about me… he thought I… that I prostituted myself on the roadside. And when he asked me how much I would take to give him a blowjob while he was driving, I decided to get out and walk. These things happen when you hitchhike like me. It's not the first time I get this kind of proposition. You just have to know how to react to prevent things from degenerating." Dean explained, looking up from his bag to look at Castiel.

The latter did not understand how someone could draw conclusions this hasty just because Dean was standing on the roadside. He couldn't imagine doing such a proposition to his passenger. Of course, he could understand that a man was attracted by Dean. He was himself and he had eyes. He knew perfectly well what people could think by seeing him. But that didn't entitle this man to make such proposition to the young man. And certainly not to imply that the latter was ready to do anything to be taken to the next town. He was sometimes surprised and shocked by the attitude of people.

"Well, if it can reassure you, that's not what I thought when I saw you." Castiel assured with a smile.

Dean shrugged before nodding.

"It reassures me."

Castiel then turned up the volume of the radio again and Dean settled more comfortably on the passenger seat. He closed his window and leaned his head against. Castiel took a new look at him and realized that the young man had impressive dark circles under his eyes. He was probably exhausted after all those hours spent walking in direct sunlight. He had well deserved to rest.

"You should sleep a little… I will wake you when we'll be arrived at the next town." Castiel said.

Dean nodded, then grabbed his sweater, rolled it into a ball and slipped it between his head and the glass. He then shifted a few seconds on the seat, presumably to find a more comfortable position, and finally closed his eyes.

"Thanks for everything Cas." Dean whispered.

Castiel saw no reason for the young man to thank him. He was happy to have a passenger for a few days. He liked his company and he was delighted to have someone to share this experience with. Maybe was he wrong to trust a man of whom he hardly knew anything. But he didn't care. He felt good in the company of Dean and he wanted to believe that he had made the right choice. He was just about to live a great adventure and he was glad to not live it alone. And the fact that Dean was incredibly attractive was a definite plus… although Castiel refused to think about it for now.

The young man tried to focus on the road and on the music the radio was broadcasting by the loudspeakers. But it was hard not to look at Dean at regular intervals. He knew, to the way the young man had to breathe deeply and slowly, that he was asleep. His face was half buried in his sweater and a hand was pressed against his sensual mouth. He seemed particularly innocent in this position, childlike and vulnerable. Castiel released the accelerator pedal and let his gaze venture into the neck of the young man. The collar of his shirt was lowered at his shoulder. Cas caught a glimpse of the top of a tattoo on his clavicle. He bit his lip. He would have liked to know what it represented. He wanted to see how big it was. And of course if it required that Dean removes his shirt, Castiel was not likely to complain. He smiled in spite of himself, then turned back to the road. He was accustomed to feel extremely strong things for men with whom he had no chance. He had always thought it was for fear of committing with them. It was easier to be attracted to men who never did a double-take when he passed one. It prevented him from having to make the first move. He stayed safely secured in his corner and never had to consider the possibility of a romantic relationship. It was inevitable for him to feel attracted to Dean. He was handsome, incredibly handsome. He was mysterious and seemed nice and funny. He was all Castiel could want. Which meant he was most likely straight. Which definitely reassured the young man. Because he didn't want a relationship with someone. He wanted to live a real adventure. Maybe meet men and have a good time with them. But he sought nothing more. And hoped he could become friends with Dean. It would be a first for him.

Castiel accelerated considerably, looking straight ahead. Beside him, Dean had started to snore softly. His presence comforted Castiel without him quite knowing why. He had never been alone in his life while being terribly lonely since he was a child. He had been surrounded by his parents and siblings. But he had always been alone at school. He had thought he would also go on this ride alone. He had thought he would be happy to. But just hours after his departure, he was already accompanied. And he was relieved of that. He knew that eventually, Dean would go. They probably wouldn't keep in contact with each other. However, they were going to do some way together and it was a novelty for Castiel. He smiled, thinking of all he didn't know yet and would probably discover with Dean. He was dizzy just by imagining all the possibilities presented to him. He had lived as a recluse much of his life and he had the feeling of having missed hundreds of things that others had known. He thought back to the tattoo in Dean's neck. He had never thought to mark himself like that. But the idea was attractive now that he could see the thin black lines hang over the hem of the shirt of the young man. He cast a new glance at his passenger. Dean was now fully turned to the window and Castiel couldn't see his face. He observed his back instead. He hadn't realized how the young man seemed more muscled than himself. His stature was masked by the too large sweater he had worn previously. But his t-shirt was sticking to his skin with sweat, leaving little to the imagination. Dean was muscled and had broad shoulders. A strip of skin was visible just above the waistband of his jeans, where his shirt was significantly raised. Castiel watched it for a second. There were traces of another tattoo on his lower back, obviously letters along his spine. Castiel was intrigued. He wondered how many tattoos the young man could have on his body. He could ask him when Dean would be awakened. He supposed it was nothing too intrusive. He nodded and turned his attention on the road for the umpteenth time. Dean was a mystery he expected to unravel. He was going to make it the aim of his trip. After all, he had nothing better to do than to get to know the man he had invited into his car. He just hoped that what he would learn wouldn't make him regret accepting him to get in.