Title: Anatomy
Author: Lacey-chan
Rating: T Later chapter may be M
Characters: Xigbar, Demyx, Axel, Roxas, Zexion, Lexeaus, Saix, Vexen, Marluxia, Larxene,
Namine, Hayner, Pence, Ollette, Xaldin, Seifer
Pairing(s) : Xigdem, Akuroku, Marvex, (mentions of) LexZex, XemXal, NamOll, HayMar,
Mareveryone, LarOll, SeiName (SaiDem friendship.)
Chapters: 1/?
Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts and characters do not belong to me. If they did, it would be a super strange world. But Square Enix/Disney saved you all from my evil takeover of the planet.
Summary: When he accepted this subbing job, Xigbar never once expected it would be so strange. Even if he was teaching science classes. The class, including Xigbar, falls under an unproperly brewed chemical's spell, and they begin to have odd urges. Who will stay that way forever, and who will be repulsed by their actions? We'll find out, won't we? (Mainly XigDem)
Chapter Title: Meet Your New Long-Term Sub...
A/N: OKAY! I was trying to figure out an AU in science today, and this popped out. I hope this story writes itself; if not, I may have to work at it. But, I'm hoping to update once a week, unless I get more feedback that I'm ready for. In that case, it depends on the demand. -nodnod- On Y!gallery I may do a poll; so yeah. Enjoy!
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Never in his life had Xigbar ever seen anything so disturbing. He'd seen death, mutilation, and his old roommate's porn collection, but he'd never seen anything like this. The halls were so full of students that there was hardly a path down the middle for him to walk; they were packed in like sardines. Other than that, though, was the fact that they were totally and completely silent.
The large man worked his way down to class 304, the Science room of one Larxene...something or other. She was a bitch to work with, the older man remembered; they'd gone to school together, though he was older than she was. It was no wonder when all of the children--well, really he couldn't call them that; it was college--turned to look at who was coming into their classroom, and cheered when they realized that it wasn't their usual teacher.
That was much better, thought the tall man, students should scream and yell and freak out when subs showed up, no matter how strange they were.
And this one looked kind of like an angry ninja-pirate-surfer. With his eyepatch over his right eye and a mangled scar on his left cheek, he really did look like he'd taken a few rounds. Especially when he took a rather large gun out of his breif case and set it inside one of the desk drawers. That deffinately silented all of the classroom's occupants as he turned his back to the board, picking up the fresh piece of chalk and, cursing the damned utensil, wrote upon the blackboard.
New Long-term Sub, Xigbar. I am not 'Xiggy', 'Xigster', your dog, homie, 'g', man, dude, or teacher. Just. Xigbar.
Nobody dared laugh or make a face; everyone, even Axel, sat in their seat and behaved. That is to say, all up until their new teacher spoke.
"Okay, little dudes, this class is...Advanced Anatomy? Well, none-a-ya look all that bright, anyway.." he didn't mind if anyone took offense, until a blonde girl in the back raised her hand.
"Uh, yeah, chicklet?"
"I feel those are sexist comments, Professor Xigbar. Could you call us by something less...stupid?"
Xigbar raised a brow, "You think I'm stupid?" The hand closest to it seemed to move for the gun-drawer.
"N-no! I was just saying...maybe you could...oh, it's okay. Just talk how you like...haha...ha.." And the girl he soon learned to be Namine slipped her arms under the desk, fidgeting with her short white shirt and the matching tank top.
Axel laughed at her, whole-heartedly, pointing and all. This kid was probably the strangest in there, as far as looks went. He had a spiked mane of bright, fire-red hair, and tear-drop looking tattoos under his emerald eyes. What. A. Fucking. Card. Xigbar would have to tell his poker buddy, Luxord, about this guy.
Speaking of Axel, it appeared there was a leach attached to his arm; oh, no. That was just another blondie, Roxas, who never left his side. Xigbar wasn't sure what to call them; the swirly-headed kid and the funky lookin one, he guessed.
Then, as for the only other girl in the class, there was Ollette, who was rather plain. Nothing too amazing or extraordinary about her brown hair, worn down, light eyes and fair complection. She did land at an even 7.5, but that didn't mean she had to be amazing.
As far as the other boys, the only one that caught a lot of interest from Xigbar, along with a danger flag going off in his head, was a young man of possibly nineteen, with something of a spiked-up mullet, who was strumming to his iPod and rocking out in the front right corner of the class; closest to his new teacher.
It only took a few seconds before this boy, dressed in a bright yellow t-shirt and the brightest, most seizure-enducing green mesh long-sleeved shirt the older man had ever seen. Under his desk were long legs that were painted black from his pants, and the gaudiest blue-brown-red and green plaid shoes he'd seen in his life; anyone had seen, actually.
But that was just Demyx for you; he was the one that not only liked to turn heads, but give those head-turners a very bad whip-lash. With his dirty blond hair always up in a mohawk and then down his back in a mullet, everyone was looking towards the supposed sloppy teen.
And that fact was not wasted on Xigbar; he stared for several minutes, until Demyx realized he was being watched and smiled, "Hi! I'm Demyx!" Well, duh. "Mr...Xigbar! How are you today? I was just listening to...a song!" he paused, looking around a minute with that amiable grin of his, then, "Hi! I'm Demyx!" and so on and so forth.
It was amazing that this boy was even capable of making it to whatever age he was. I mean, for serious, he was about as bright as a goldfish. Haha, fish. Funny, because Demyx did participate in everything he could that involved water; he was a lifeguard--Xigbar would have hated to drown with Demyx on guard--and he was on the swim team, recreational, of course.
Finally, the bell rang in the classroom and everyone turned to the front.
Xigbar looked at the attendance roster; Larxene penciled it herself.
Brat one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine...
Now, that was rediculous. Sighing, he looked it up on an email he'd gotten on his laptop.
"Axel?"
"Here!"
"Demyx's here..."
"HERE!"
"I know...um...Hayner?"
"...here.."
"Marluxia? Namine?"
"Right hurrr!"
"Here, Mr. Xigbar!"
"Don't call me that...Ollette?"
A shy noise came from her general direction.
"Ooookay...Pence? Roxas? Seifer?"
"Hiya!"
"Humph."
"Right here."
"Okay, and...Vexen?"
The pink haired boy, who apperantly thought he was Ghetto Fabulous or something, responded for his blonde...companion.
"He's right thurr!"
"Thank you...Marlux--"
"Call me Marly!"
"Marly...right...um, well...Lesson plans say you have to...do something with a skeleton." He gave a gruff mumble, "How about, instead, we learn about it more...well, differently?"
The class cheered as Xigbar turned and left the class a moment. When he returned, a blonde man with an equally blonde beard-thing walked in the room, really dragged, behind him. "This, dudes, is a man."
The class gave a corrisponding, "Duh."
"Lux, off with the jacket and shirt."
The blond, Luxord, looked at Xigbar oddly before complying; first to come off was the leather jacket, and then the grey t-shirt he had beneath it.
"Kay, dudes, I want you all to try and sketch or describe what you see."
Marluxia raised his hand, "Xigbar?"
"Yeah, kid?"
"Can I describe it verbally?"
"Tch...as if."
Then he went to writing, before holding up several pieces of paper, showing the whole class.
I see a hot guy with no shirt in a totally rapeable position. I'm SO fucking hard.
Xigbar raised a brow and blinked slowly, face questioning. "Go take care of it, kid. You know where the bathroom is, I'm sure."
Marly ran from the room, not at all embarassed. Luxord, on the other hand, was as red as Axel's hair. "Xigbar...you better not--"
"Lux, pants and unders off."
"Xig.."
Click, click.
"Kay!" And with that, the younger male stripped down to nothing, making the girls giggle and several boys to stare wide-eyed at their teacher. He felt vaguely assured nothing would happen; he had been told this was a school specifically for GLBTQ students, after all, so the only rape Luxord should have expected would be from the boys.
Not that that would be unwanted attention.
"Tomorrow, I'll have one of my female friends come in to show you the female anatomy."
When the boys groaned, in an exasperated fashion, Xigbar held up his hands in protest, "Hey, now! Dudes, it's cool. They had to see your eyecandy." He gestured to Ollette and Namine, "You getta see theirs."
Namine raised a hand, "I'm not gay, you know."
"Then what are you?"
"Heteroflexible."
Xigbar slammed his head into his hand. This would be an interesting class to teach. And, in return, the students could tell this class would become their favorite, with Xigbar as the teacher.
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I hope you all liked it...reviews and such will be greatly appriciated. And faves are fine, I don't mind faves without comments, I do it, too. 3 Hope to see you in the next chapter, loves.