Unafraid at last
Gilmore Girls FanFiciton
Rory's POV
Oh, gosh. I am so nervous. This dress doesn't look right. Why did it look so much better before? I think I'm going to hurl. No, calm. I took a deep breath. Everything is going to be fine. No, everything IS fine.
"Rory? You look beautiful. You know that right?" My best friend Layne says as she smothers me with a huge hug. Her jet, black hair is let loose in beautiful curls down to her chest. I smiled at the thought of that crazy day when we died her hair a purple brighter than her dress, even if it was only for a mere ten minutes.
"Thanks, Layne. I'm so scared," I said in a way that she knew i was looking for her special advice that always helps no matter what.
"It's a good scared, right? Because I know that's how i felt. Like adrenaline scared. It just makes everything better."
My response was a hug. "Your the best."
Just then who else but my mother walks in, bubbly and bright as always. Dressed in the same color as Layne, a bump barely noticed beneath her dress. She's been with Luke- I'll never be able to call him dad- again. Her face, it lights up for a good ten minutes after she's with him.
"Hey, hon. You ready? I gave you your time alone with Layne, so you better be. God knows you weren't finishing up getting ready. Have no fear though, everything is perfect," she finishes with a pointed, yet joking, look at the girl who's been in my life since that day I had to share my crayons in Kindergarden. Mom takes my hands and gently pulls me off the footrest on which I had sat down on. She adjusts my simple, yet elegant, dress and does a light touch-up on my makeup. "Listen, honey, today is your day. Don't worry about a thing."
Naturally, just in time to ruin one of mom's more sane moments, Grandma walks in babbling on in a loud voice saying,
"Lorelai, you better be moving Rory along because- oh, my, Rory! You look positively sensational! Though i must say, in no insult whatsoever that you look just like your mother!" She give one of her little smirks that mean well and adds, "But you ladies must be going. Hurry up or we'll never be on time! The song is about to start. Boy, i do NOT see how anything would run around here without me directing everybody." The last part seeming more for herself then those in the room. Mom and Layne rush out of the room and i follow.
Luke is waiting for me as i open the door from my dressing room. He has his half grimace, half smile on. I guess that IS Luke's smile though. The only time ive seen a real smile- one of those where your whole face seems to be pulled up by an invisible cord smiles- is when he was watching Mom walk down the aisle in the same dress i have on right now. I think that's what brings the smile up a notch. He is seeing her in me. At least i hope so. I was reminded of that quirky woman that i love not just when Grandma pointed it out, but the very first time I tried on mom's beautiful creation. The things she can do with a needle and thread.
It was hard. Deciding who to have walk me down the aisle, that is. Dad or Luke? Luke or Dad? Or are they just the same person now? It took me, believe it or not, three days to decide. In the end it was Luke. I love Dad but he just wasn't always there, wasn't always the great dad- especially when I really needed him. But Luke. Luke has been there for as long as i can remember, my long time coffee supplier, really the only person i could call my father figure, only to myself of course. He always had my back, could always take my side, hold me up when i started to fall down. Just like he will now.
I give him a huge genuine smile thinking about how my life might of been if he wasn't always there.
"He's a lucky bastard that boy."
Exactly what i needed Luke to say, and somehow...he said it. I sigh and give a little snort, but reach for a hug nonetheless. I whisper in his ear,
"Please don't let me fall."
"Don't worry, I'm here."
The wedding march changes chords, our signal to get ready, and those double doors open; i take his hand. With another grateful smile, we take a step out into the garden.
It's July, so the thick straps that keep my dress modest yet still sleeveless is much appreciated for my outdoor wedding. I love the way that sounds. My wedding. I see him standing there at the alter, waiting for me, looking more beautiful than anything I've ever seen. He's looking at me exactly the way i always hoped for. Everything was perfect and at that moment when our eyes met all of my worries flew out the door. Nothing mattered but him. I thought of our struggle to get here. Of that stolen kiss when i was still with that cheating dooshbag. Of how he always loved me...and always will. I barely notice Luke giving me away. All i have eyes for is the one I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. As he takes my hand and looks into my blue eyes and I into his deep chocolate brown ones Jess asks,
"You scared?"
"Nope."
And knowing that Jess is mine forever...I'm not.