CREATED BY: Her Majesty Ashley

"Don't you have somewhere else to be?" He asked with a hint of annoyance in his voice.

"Thought you liked some company since everybody left and headed to the festival." She said as she crossed her arms and leaned against the living room doorway.

"You guessed wrong. Prefer to be alone and have some peace and quite while everybody's gone." He looked up from his book and saw the girl whose set on annoying him for the rest of his life, or at least he leaves for good.

"Well then, sorry for interrupting your quite time." She said as she turned and stormed toward her room.

Men, you try to be nice, try to care for them and what does that get you? No where! Geez why did God have to put men like him on earth? Grr…

Finally that woman left, he thought as he opened his book that held no cover so no one suspected him to be reading 'How to get along with Women'. At first it had embarrassed him when he got it, but now he was comfortable reading it around her so as long as she doesn't try to read it. Now where was I? Chapter 1.

Chapter One

How to get the Girl

"If she's screaming and throwing objects at you, then she's either upset at you or you are just an victim that got in her way but if she's mad at you let her get everything out of her system then when it looks like she tired and gonna fall down gently grab a chair or catch her when she's about to fall. It would be better for you to catch her but probably you'll let your pride get in the way, so if you have a HUGE ego then go get the non-romantic chair for the love of your life instead of your nice romantic arms. Next are tips every guy should know if you didn't know don't worry I got ya covered.

When you start flirting, there are things you should do.
1. Don't ever go up to her girl randomly and say, "Hey, sweet thang." I swear to God, you'd be the stupidest person there. You'd feel stupid too after she laughs at you and walks away or if she gives you a look that says, "What is wrong with your crazy self?" and inches away from you. Don't ever.

2. If she's with her friends, slyly walk past her, while trying to get her attention, with your head down a bit ( not all the way down because you'll look like you're really shy and depressed. ), glance at her and crookedly grin. I see it all the time and it makes me want to melt. It works all the time.

3. If you don't get her attention, don't walk back and fourth because it'll look like you're trying to stalk her really badly. Just somehow walk back near her and drop something, and pick it up. It'll possibly get her attention. If she looks at you after the picking up the dropped object, glance up at her, smirk at your success and coolly say, "Hey."

4. If that didn't work, pick a different girl and do the same thing.

5. Once you're somehow in conversation with her, don't say things like, "You're a weird chick."

More Tips:

be nice to everyone (including animals), not just your crush. Girls notice these things.

2. Make excuses to talk to her. She'll appreciate that you're going out of your way to talk to her. (I.e. ask her 'what time is it?' to borrow a pencil or pen etc.)

3. When asking her out, don't be afraid of her saying no, if she does, chances are she won't be mean about it. But even if she doesn't like you right now, she IS flattered that you're paying attention to her. We all love to be noticed. She may say yes at a later time. Ask AGAIN

4. If you have a girlfriend, include her in your life, don't exclude her. If you play sports, ask her to come to one of your games and meet the team. Introduce her to your family. Do things that YOU like to do, except, with her. She wants to be a part of your life, not watching in from the outside.

5. Flattery is acceptable, and appreciated. BUT ONLY IF YOU MEAN IT. Notice little things about her, don't just say 'you're beautiful' all the time. If she wears her hair differently, tell her you like it. If she gets a new pair of shoes, notice them. Also, flatter her personality.

6. We all love surprises, they make us feel special and loved. I didn't say PARTIES though. If your planning a surprise party, ask friends and family if she likes that kind of stuff first.

7. Innocently touch her whenever you can. If your nervous, try starting out by touching her arms or shoulder when you talk or when you're walking. See how she reacts and go further if you get the 'all clear'.

8. Last of all. Just love her and let her love you. That's all she really wants. To love and be loved

One last thing………

Girls love to know that they're cared for. Call her just to talk, or call because you miss her. Girls love that stuff. Also, here's a major tip, when a girl is getting over emotional and crying and you're not sure why, all she really needs is you to hold her. So don't be manly and try to make it better, just hold her, comfort her, tell her its ok, when she's ready she'll tell you what's on her mind. Trust me."

Just as he was about to turn to the next chapter a scream brought him back to reality.

"Ahhhhhhhhh!"