I don't know what I'm doing. It seems that the more I ship against Klaine, the more I write featuring Kurt and Blaine.
This is kind of my speculation fic about what's going down between Kurt and Blaine in 'I Do' so slight spoilers for that? Really, if you're in this fandom at all, you know exactly what's going down. I probably should have waited to publish this because God only knows if Glee would actually give them a scene like this, but whatever.
It should be known that this isn't really a Klaine story. I... well just read. Again, slight spoilers for 'I Do'
Disclaimer: I have no interest in owning Glee anymore. I'm not even sure why I truly care about this show at this point.
He wakes in the arms that seem familiar and foreign all at once.
Kurt's eyes open to see the sun streaking through the window and onto the comforter. The heater hums quietly to his left, the only sound to distract from the two calm breathings coming from the bed. Kurt can feel the breath of his former lover on the back of his neck. It's awkward to spoon with him, Blaine never quite fitting very well against Kurt when he's the big spoon, but it feels more awkward now. Kurt sighs quietly to himself.
Last night was wonderful, like they were back in high school with all the time in the world to make love and catch up with each other. It's what Kurt has been missing since long before graduation; a feeling of infinity. He misses the touch of Blaine's fingers with no deadline to meet and the soft sighs they emit when they reach the highest point of their night. He misses his own fingers running through dark curls and Blaine's honey amber eyes devouring him like he's the only one in the world. He's been craving the connection between two people like they've always meant to be pieced together whether it be by touch alone or a deeper connection. It's like Kurt is seventeen again, falling head over heels in love once more.
Kurt thought it was what he was missing, the feeling of love and adoration, and yet he still remains... thirsty? Blaine gives him what he wants; safety, love and happiness. But, at this point in Kurt's life, he isn't sure that it's enough anymore.
After all this time, Kurt has been missing what Blaine just gave him and now it hasn't made a difference. He's not a high school senior anymore, he's in college with an internship that he adores and living under a roof that he pays for with his own earnings. Kurt has grown up, so much older than the man he left in the halls of McKinley. He left a piece of himself on that stage when he received that diploma and he thinks he left one more thing on that stage.
Really, he doesn't love Blaine the way he did in a time that feels like years ago. Blaine is what's holding him back from really growing up. Blaine is the remnants of when he thought the future was an abstract idea and the world seemed infinite.
Maybe that's why they don't fit together as well now.
Blaine clutches Kurt tighter like a little boy with a teddy bear and it breaks Kurt's heart. Kurt thinks about the amount of time that Blaine dedicated to showing Kurt his love last night, whispering it into his skin as he physically showed him. He can almost feel the burn of Blaine's fingertips, tracing the words as if tattooing them on. It felt right last night, when the heat was turned high and the love was burning. Now the cold bitterness of the morning has woken Kurt up from last night's spell and it's got him thinking.
He unwraps himself from Blaine's arms with much difficulty, being able to replace himself with his pillow before Blaine's sleeping form starts to notice. His nose is buried into the pillow almost instantly as if drawn to the heat and scent it provides. Kurt looks on at the site with something even he can't identify in his eyes. Is it pity, love or longing? He tries not to dwell.
He shivers, the heater not doing much to warm him up. It's like the tundra outside of the bed with Blaine's furnace of a body. Kurt figures that a shower will warm him up.
He gathers his clothes which are strewn around the room, slightly annoyed with Blaine for wrinkling some of them. Blaine should know better after all this time of knowing each other.
He walks to the bathroom, careful not to trip over their shoes on the way. He turns on the light as stares himself down in the mirror. He looks tired rather than revitalized with the late night he just woke up from and his hair is worse than it usually is when he wakes up. He tries to ignore how disgusting he looks, knowing there's not much he can do about it now.
He showers slower than usual, letting the warm water cascade over his skin and when he's done, he reluctantly puts on the same clothes he just collected from the around the hotel room. He opens the bathroom door back out into the room and it's just as quiet as he left it, Blaine continuing to sleep like the dead.
He moves to sit on the untouched opposite bed. Blaine had been ever the gentleman and got an extra bed in the room in case Kurt didn't go along with Blaine's plan to make a move. Kurt doesn't regret their night together though. It felt like closure, something he's been seeking with Blaine for a while. He takes his phone out of his pocket, checking for texts or emails. There's nothing for him on the screen, only the stupid selfie Adam had taken with him the last time they met for coffee. Kurt smiles to himself when he sees Adam's dorky little grin and his arm around Kurt's shoulder in a way that anyone else would take as sign that they're together. Kurt's eyes drift away from him and Adam to look at Blaine, silently comparing. This feels like a crossroad for Kurt, choosing between the love of his seventeen year old self or the friendship of his current self. His phone screen has long gone black when Kurt tares his eyes from Blaine.
He unlocks his phone and goes into his contacts, tapping the first one on the list.
"Hey, it's Adam! Leave your message at the beep."
"Hey Adam, it's..." Kurt was so sure of himself when he dialled, but it's like the confidence has been sapped from him. His eyes look up from the ground up to Blaine again, his bare back meeting Kurt's stare. He takes that as encouragement. "Kurt. It's Kurt. Call me back when you get the chance. I want to talk to you and... I miss you. Okay, thanks, bye."
Review me? I haven't written any fic in a while and I feel kind of rusty.