A/N: Hmm, I've taken a liking to Tom. No one ever writes about him, and he usually surfaces in stories only as an insanely jealous and slightly psychotic figure who resembles an angered stereotypical air-headed cheerleader more than he does a gay male. As far as I can tell, this is only the second fanfic here on which features Tom as a main character --- 'Café Tombstone' (mine also) was the first. And this is the only one from his point of view, as far as I know.
Boku wa Mahou Shoujo BiShounen! I am the warrior of underrated, background characters, and in the name of these fictional souls, I write fanfiction! (1)
Ok, ok... I'll lay off the caffeine...
I Think I Love You
By Cradlerobber Speedo-kun
I look at the beautiful blonde next to me, and can't help but think, 'Hey, I think I love you.' (2) All of that was horribly cliched, I know, but some people would tell you I'm a walking cliché. Or, at least, a walking stereotype. Hey, everyone, look at my limp wrists! And my funny walk! I love hamsters! (3)
I was lying about the last one. Really.
Anyway, the beautiful blonde is none other than Dylan Michaelchuk, my friend and crush. Or, as the wonderful Jay Neeling (4) put it once, my "man crush". Thank you, gangsta. Please go back to stealing VCR's and not bothering me. We all know you just want to jump Sean Cameron's bones, anyway. (5)
But, my dear Dylan is in love with someone else. Even though we basically figured out we were gay together, he loves someone else. Figures, doesn't it? We have a complicated past, pretty much, but as for right now it's simple: Tom loves Dylan, but Dylan has a crush on Marco Del Rossi, and Marco Del Rossi is cutely enamored of Dylan. And I swear Dylan's younger sister is rubbing off on me.
I could be jealous. And, yeah, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't. But, at the same time... I'm glad that Dylan found someone he really cares about... even if it isn't me. He lights up around that boy. And the boy is completely devoted to him. It's picture perfect, and I can't be consumed by jealousy if my closest friend/biggest crush is happy because of it. And he is. So, I guess his happiness is my happiness (6). It's okay for me that way. I can live unrequited.
At first, it did annoy me a little bit. I mean, here was the guy who was supposed to (eventually) be mine. We both figured out we were gay back in 9th grade. I had noticed I was a little less interested in girls than I should have been, and I don't know what was going on with Dylan. He had had a girlfriend, but somehow it happened anyway. We were curious. Experimenting, you could call it. So, we had sex together. Yeah, friends having sex together, never is a really good idea, no matter what the genders. It was an absolutely mind-blowing experience. He walked away realizing he was gay, and I walked away realizing I was crazy about him. Which meant I was gay, obviously, so we both walked away realizing we were gay, but I digress.
I tried to bed him again several times, but it never worked. But he didn't realize what was obvious to a lot of other people, that I had a crush on him. He just thought I was being horny and found it annoying.
I only had sex with him one time after that, and never again. He had just found out that his younger sister, Paige, had been raped at a party, and he was heartbroken. He didn't know what to do, he felt like he had failed to protect her, and he didn't know what to say to her because he felt like he'd somehow say the wrong thing. He was so upset, he was crying, his hair was all messed up, he was a complete mess, really. Even though I don't have siblings, I knew how he felt. And somehow, comforting him turned into us making love. Yeah, making love. I loved him, and he was hurt... and I was trying to make him feel better.
He later apologized for it. I told him he didn't need to, I understood. I knew he didn't love me back, even when we were making love. I never tried to get him into bed again after that.
So, considering all that, I was a bit miffed at first about the fact that Dylan had finally developed a serious crush on someone --- and that the someone wasn't me. But, I got used to it quickly when I knew that there wasn't going to be any chance of my changing his mind. And when I saw how happy he looked when he was talking to Marco. I morphed into psychotically supportive friend mode, because, really, I was happy because he was happy, and I only wanted him to continue to be happy. If you've ever had a really close friend who you've fixed up with someone you know they really like, you'll know exactly what I mean --- minus the being in love with said friend part (7).
So, the beautiful blonde next to me is grinning madly, a happy flush to his cheeks, and Marco just said bye because he has to go to class. He turns to me, and I can't help but grin, "Aren't we the romantic, Mr. Michaelchuk?" He blushes, and ducks his head. How cute. "Oh, shut up." He tells me good naturedly, before digging into his locker.
Ah, life. I wouldn't have it any other way.
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(1) Boku wa Mahou Shoujo BiShounen translates to 'I am Magical Girl Pretty Boy!' Erm... don't ask... But my repertoire of underrated, background character fanfics include Beth (who appeared in the episode 'Zen and the Art of Bicycle Maintenance' in Radio Free Roscoe), MC/Todd (who appeared in episode 'Cougar Ray-dio', also RFR), Jay (whom we all know, and has had a few fics from other people, too), Seamus (Harry Potter, who does have quite a few fics about him, but still qualifies as underrated and background because of the fact that there are three million Harry Potter fics), Cornelius Fudge (Harry Potter), and now Tom. And, yes, that was blatant self-promotion.
(2) From the song 'I Think I Love You' by Dave Cassidy, of Partridge Family fame. I used to love that show.
(3) Uhh... that was really rude of me, and sort of unnecessary. If you don't get it... uhh... ask someone else. I'm not explaining it here.
(4) I've seen recently his name being given as Jay Hobart, though, so I'm a little confused. I attempted to consult official sources, but he isn't named on The-N's website, TvTome (don't hit me, I know they suck but they give the names right at least) bills him simply as 'Jay', and I couldn't manage to find it on degrassi.tv. =/
(5) XD Sorry, couldn't resist. If you like the idea of Jay and Sean together, go read' Within My Grasp' by keeponwritin. It's friggin' good.
(6) I understand completely how this feels, but I stole this line almost completely from CardCaptor Sakura. Tomoyo says it to Sakura in the third season of it, although what she says exactly is 'Your happiness is my happiness, Sakura.' So I altered it slightly.
(7) I'm sorry, but I just had to say I know how this feels. It's an incredible feeling. I wish I loved more of my friends like this.
Whew! That was a lot of notes!