Everything was hard after Dallas and Johnny passed on, especially for Sodapop. No one would really expect him to be impacted so greatly by it, but it could be argued that he was hurt the most by the events that unfolded. It seemed like he was to be everyone's free counselor, and taking care of people was emotionally draining, especially when you had your own problems to be dealing with. On top of his two buddies dying, his girlfriend had cheated on him and left him. Perhaps the former would've been easier to deal with if the latter hadn't happened, or if he didn't have to hear everyone's pain regarding the deaths. It always resulted in him cradling them as they sobbed into his shoulder... But no matter how much it drained him, he was good at what he did. And it made him happy, because he made his friends happy.
Nevertheless, the now 17 year old boy sat moping in his room. He was draped across his bed, thinking and pondering countless thoughts regarding the current situation. Well, maybe not current. Sandy had left him quite some time ago, but it still hurt him. The pain had dulled over now, and he knew that because this time around he couldn't feel tears streaming down his warm cheeks. He was just wondering where his thoughts could possibly lead him this time.
I'm just not ever good 'nuff for girls... I dunno what it is. Maybe I just ain't cut out for it...I mean, they all seem to end up leavin' me anyway... Maybe it would work out if I was with a guy...
He got his answer, and it made his eyes go wide and his heart skip a beat.
Could he do that? Date a guy? Could he date a guy?
Was that...okay?
He shifted and sat up, squirming against his headboard a bit. In his 17 years of existence, this thought had never once crossed his mind, and he didn't know how to feel about it. It seemed sort of odd and weird, but at the same time...it made his stomach flutter.
He put his hand over his stomach and swallowed. Surely this was something that other people have thought of before. But if it was...why was it that no one had ever talked about it? Why didn't he see men holding men in the streets and women sweeping women off of each others' feet?
He furrowed his brows and found himself gazing at the clock. Ponyboy was in school right now, but Darry had a day off. He swung his feet over to the floor, planting them firmly. He nodded to himself, deciding that he would talk to Darry about this and get some advice.
Darry was always level-headed, and what he had to say would surely clear these questions up.