To all my followers who might be wondering about the fact that "Flying Free" hasn't been updated in AGES, I am SO SORRY. I've had a massive case of writer's block for it, but I have recently started another chapter so hopefully it will be updated soon.

But for now, I am coping with all my "Delirium" series feels by writing sad stuff about Blue and Raven. These books are seriously amazing, all character credit goes to the very talented Lauren Oliver.

(I need to start putting disclaimers on all my stories...)

She was the first one to find out.

Far before anyone else.

Little girl Blue.

It was cold. Snow was blowing in gusts around the homestead. Everyone was hunkered down inside, sheltered from the wind. But the cold crept in the cracks, infiltrated into the rooms, left people shivering and rubbing their hands together and huddling close for warmth.

The homesteaders went to bed early, bellies half-full.

Blue curled up under her blanket in her place beside Raven, her mama, sister, best friend and hero all rolled into one. She fell asleep quickly, sucking her little thumb.

But she woke, in the middle of the night, from a strange dream – and saw that Raven was getting up. Her long dark hair fell in front of her face as she tiptoed out of the room. Blue watched through half-open eyes, curious, but too cold to move.

She tried to go back to sleep, but she couldn't. Something felt missing without Raven's form merely inches away, right there to comfort her, right within reach.

Slowly she got up, wrapped her blanket around her shoulders, walked out as quietly as she could. She was good at being quiet. The blanket trailed behind her like a princess's cloak in the stories Grandma told.

She walked down the hall, her feet in too-big socks padding softly along the stone floor. Her chubby toddler legs moved quickly, her sleepy yet sharp eyes were on the lookout for Raven. She needed to find her.

Blue heard a noise. A soft laugh. It was coming from the storage room. She slowed her step, peeked around the corner, heart beating loud, and then softening back to normal pace when she recognized Raven's tangled curls. She stood there in the doorway, looking, her big eyes wide.

Tack and Raven lay there on a blanket, Raven in Tack's arms. Neither of them saw her at first – Tack was brushing a piece of hair out of Raven's eyes, he kissed her forehead and said something that made her laugh. Then Raven kissed him right on the mouth and Blue heard Tack say, after they pulled apart, "My love."

Blue didn't know, not then, that inside the fences that word was dangerous. Violation of laws. Insane.

For her, it meant, simply, love.

She didn't know that inside the fences, her beloved Raven would be condemned for what she was doing.

Love, to Blue, was as natural as the sunrise.

"Raven?" Blue whispered.

Raven turned, startled at first, then a small smile turning up one side of her lips. "Hey sweetheart, what is it?"

"I'm cold." Blue suddenly felt shy and brought her thumb back up to her mouth. Maybe she shouldn't have come looking for Raven, maybe she and Tack didn't want her there.

But Raven held out her hand. "C'mere," she said, rolling a bit apart from Tack.

Blue walked over hesitantly. Wordless communication passed between the two teenagers, and Raven patted the space between her and Tack.

"Me?" Blue said, around her thumb.

"Yes, you." Raven reached out and tugged on the hem of Blue's shirt. "You said you were cold."

Blue needed no more invitation. She crawled down right between them, her blanket still wrapped around her like a princess cloak, and curled up against Raven, her head nestled in the place by her neck that had always been hers, ever since she was a tiny baby.

She wasn't cold anymore.

Raven stroked Blue's wispy blond hair with one hand, and Tack found the other, held it tight, looked across the already half-asleep child between them into Raven's green eyes, and whispered,

I love you.

And Raven tugged on his hand, urging him closer, so Blue was sheltered between them like a secret, like she had been the first time they kissed. And she whispered back, looking into Tack's dark eyes,

I love you.

And her head bent, down to kiss the sleeping child's hair, and she whispered again, I love you. Blue.

And their breathing slowed, three hearts beating, until they were all fast asleep, with those three forbidden words echoing in their hearts. Forbidden, but they were free, free to say them and feel them and live them.

I love you.