Metal

(Disclaimer: I don't own Shrek or Kung Fu Panda. This idea is kind of random . . . Anyway, review please.)

Shen gazed at the metal cage the wolves had brought before him. Boss Wolf recognized that gaze and tried not to show a reaction, it was never good to see Lord Shen like that.

"Well it's metal." Shen admitted, going back up to full height and walking closer to the wolves, stepping around the cage to do so. "But I believe we've established that it's not enough metal, haven't we?"

Shen and the Boss Wolf were making eye contact now, hard as it was with only one open eye. The Boss Wolf nodded nervously. "Uh, yes, yes my Lord we did."

Shen tiled his head slightly. "Then where, is, THE REST OF THE METAL!?"

"Well . . . uh. . ."

Earlier that day. . .

The wolves drudged through the very wet forest. Things weren't going well. There hadn't been any signs of civilization for a while, and that made it hard to collect metal. But going back empty pawed would be a mistake.

Luckily for the wolves, their lack of luck changed just then. The forest abruptly ended, opening to a clearing. It came so fast one of the wolves walked out into the clearing without realizing it. The Boss Wolf grabbed him and pulled him back into the trees.

Then he looked around. There was a strange structure in the center of the clearing that seemed to have creatures living inside. Except the creatures inside were strange. They were big, and green, and walked on two legs. The boss wolf tried to think of a creature that looked similar. So far, no such luck.

"What sort of place is this?" a female wolf, Yue, asked.

That was a good question. . . No, no it's not. The boss wolf shook it off. "Doesn't matter. It has metal." He told her. Since there were a lot of tents pitched around the clearing he had everyone split into two groups, one led by him the other led by Yue.

He led his wolves to the main structure. Wolves burst through the door, howling as they went. One of the creatures, female considering the hair, shouted something. But it wasn't in a language the boss wolf understood. She leapt into the air and kicked one of his wolves right out the window. The boss wolf looked outside to make sure the wolf was okay. He seemed fine, just surprised. He was getting back up already. The other wolves all turned on the creatures. They began attacking, except one of the younger wolves who was pulling out draws searching for anything made of metal.

Since they seemed to have things well in hand the boss wolf looked around the outside of the structure. There was a cage hanging nearby, and something was in the cage. Once again, the boss wolf didn't recognize what was in the cage but it wasn't his business. He used his hammer to smash the cage's door, fling the creature out, and then picked up the cage, carrying it over his shoulder.

"What've you found?!" He called to the wolves inside.

One of the wolves, the one who'd been chucked out the window, showed him a bag of metal objects.

"Good, now let's go." He growled. That plan didn't work so well.

Yue meanwhile, was raiding one of the tents with another wolf, Longwei . Another one of the strange green creatures were in here. The put something in a pan and catuplteded it at the wolves.

"Duck for cover!" Shouted Longwei. He leapt out of the way as something red splatted against the tent. He'd have been hit a few seconds ago.

The green thing shot another one, this one aimed at Yue. She let out a yelp and jumped out of the way. She scrambled under the table in the middle of the tent for cover. One of the red things was sitting on the very edge of the table. A bit of it dripped down. Yue opened her mouth to yelp again, and the bit landed in her mouth. Weird, it didn't feel painful. In fact. . . Yue swallowed it. "This is food!" She told Longwei. "Get him!" Actually maybe it was a her. . . Whatever.

Yue and Longwei got out of their hiding places and started stalking closer to the green thing, growling as they went. At first the green creature wasn't fazed. He-she?-launched more food. Longwei caught the food in his mouth, eating it. Now the green creature looked nervous.

They were getting close. Then out of nowhere the two started dancing. "What's going on?!" Yue cried.

"I have no idea!" Longwei cried.

They danced their way out of the tent. All the other wolves were dancing too, to the rhythm of yet another strange creature playing a flute. Everyone had a dance partner, so had been forced to drop their metal to continue.

Well, almost every wolf had a partner. The boss wolf was on his own, so he was using the cage he'd gotten as a dance partner. At least that meant he'd managed to keep it.

All the green things came out and cheered. The flute playing creature went to the front of the line the boss wolf hadn't even realized he and his wolves had made. The flute player moved away, and all the wolves danced after him. In fact, he danced them right out of the forest. Yeah, Shen would totally believe that.

(Yue and Longwei appeared too many times not to name them, but I got a little lazy looking for names.)