This is by no means a happy story. There's love, but this Fanfiction is here to give people a taste of reality. Life in Middle Earth isn't all feasting and glory.

Not my first FF, but the first one in a while. I was a little sad that Tolkien never really gave Dis her own story, so I figured I should.

I, by no means, own anything created by Tolkien, whether it be characters, world or names.

I do, whoever, own the characters of Uta, Jutta, Airili, Liadan, or any other character that doesn't appear in The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, or any movies under those names. Thank you.

~T.P.T.

Smile Like You Mean It

The Tragic Tale of Dis

Chapter One;; Why Do I Keep Counting?

My will to live wavered. I could feel every fiber of my body sigh in acceptance.

I was ready to die.

Nothing anchored me to the physical world any longer. No friends, no family, no children, no love. I wasn't only ready to die, but I wanted to.

My life felt like a blur of sadness and grief. Happiness was a rarity for me. My only happiness, the fruits of my body, my sons, lay stone cold and lifeless under the mountain they sought out so greedily with their uncle. Thorin... my dearest brother. The first born of my father and mother, Prince under the Lonely Mountain. He too, was gone.

It dawned on me then that I was now heir to the throne. Not that it mattered, however. There were no single ruling Queens- at least there had never been before, and I don't believe any of the Dwarf race wished for me to rule... And I didn't have a husband anymore. But I didn't want to rule. Anyone I could have kept safe with that power was already dead.

Cold tears dripped from my bearded chin. My heart ached. I could feel my time closing to an end.

Perhaps if I had never been born the ones I loved would have been spared.

I laughed bitterly as I wiped the tears from my cheeks with an embroidered sleeve. Childish thoughts like that would get me no where.

Before I could stop myself, my laugh became a choke. I hung my head in shame, clawing at the place above my heart.

Silly girls always read foolish books that involved heart break, and as that girl I would laugh and say there was no such thing. I was wrong beyond belief.

I could feel my heart breaking under my clenched fingers. Breathing became difficult. Tears rushed from my eyes and I was unable to stop them.

Me, a princess of royal blood, unable to stop tears. I was taught to be emotionless, controlling, everything a princess should be, whether she took the throne one day or not. I could care less.

In my distress, I fell out of my chair and to my knees, my white and blue dress cushioning my knees slightly.

I wanted them back. What I wouldn't give to get them all back. I would suffer a thousand deaths for each just to bring them back. I was nothing in the world. I was a Dwarf woman, alone and unloved. They... they ruled. They led their people to victory on countless occasions. My sons, my husband, my brothers, my sister-in-law, my father, my mother, my grandfather. They deserved life, not I.

Not I.

Oh, these years have been so trying
I don't know if I can use them
Help me get down
I can make it, help me get down
Help me get down
I can make it, help me get down
If I only knew the answer
If I change my way of living
And if I pave my streets with good times
Will the mountain keep on giving?

If you haven't realized, the title, the title of the chapter and the end lyrics all belong to The Killers.

I'd love some feed back~ It's always appreciated. Especially on boring, intro chapters like this. I know this is a bit slow of a start, but... it just seemed like the right place to start for Dis.

Thanks so much in advance!

(By the way, don't expect updates too often, since starting the first of July I'll be in Europe for three weeks!)

~T.P.T.