Alternate "By the Fireside" (in three parts) A DQMW Fanfiction Story
Part 1 & 3 - By: Jewelianna Dec. 2009
Part 2 - By: Tess Dec. 2009
Fanfiction Rating – M
Prequel - This Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman fanfic is a modified version of "By the Fireside" written by Jewelianna who has given me permission to publish this altered rendition, truly inspired by her original, on this website. This story is set up in three parts to give Jewelianna proper credit for her exact words taken from the original fanfic. The reason for this rewrite is to give Sully another opportunity to demonstrate to Michaela that there is more for her to experience on her wedding night than just the discomfort and pain mentioned in her mid-1800 medical textbooks.
Co-Authored Version of "By the Fireside"
Part 1
By: Jewelianna
Michaela brushed aside a branch that blocked the path, straining to see by the low light of the moon. She knew it wasn't wise to be walking alone in the woods at night, but over the past several months she had memorized this route. She could walk it with her eyes closed.
The glow of the fire reached through the darkness. Wolf ran to greet her and guide her on the last few steps to the clearing where Sully's lean-to sat tucked against the trees.
Sully knelt by the fire, bare-chested. The light danced over his skin in a tempting glow and Michaela's breath caught. Tomorrow they would be married, she thought. He would be her husband. She smiled at the idea, and felt her grin spread when he looked up and caught her eye.
"What're you doing here?" Sully asked, rising. He reached behind him for his shirt, pulling it on quickly. "Did you walk out here all alone?"
Clutching her shawl around her shoulders, Michaela felt rather foolish. She shouldn't have come, she thought. This could have waited until after the wedding. "I couldn't sleep."
Sully came around the fire and reached for her, holding her gently by the shoulders. "Me either." He rubbed her shoulders, hands warm through her thin shirt.
"I just keep thinking about tomorrow. Nothing's gone according to plan, and I'm just afraid it's going to be terrible." Her family, her friends, Custer; it seemed the world was throwing every obstacle it could in their path.
Drawing her closer, Sully tucked her head against his neck, cradling her to his chest. "None of that matters as long as we're wedded at the end of the day."
Tension eased out of her, and her heart beat faster against his chest. He was right, of course. She circled her arms around his waist and murmured "I love you," tipping her face up to his. His lips met hers gently, a soft caress of love. She opened her lips slowly and felt his tongue sweep in. The first time he'd done that, she'd pulled back in shock, but through their courtship and engagement she'd learned to enjoy the passion in Sully's kisses. Something insider her caught fire and began to burn with need.
"Wait," she said, drawing back. She saw the look of disappointment in his eyes. "No, it's not… I mean, I came out here to give you this." She drew back and pulled a book from her waistband and handed it to him. He turned it over and read the title stamped on the cover.
"Leaves of Grass. Whitman." He smiled as he thumbed through the pages.
"I thought you'd like a copy of your own. I know it's not much of a wedding present, but I didn't have much time to come up with something after giving Cloud Dancing your shirt. I thought," she said, feeling the blush creep up her cheeks, "that we could read it together."
He closed the book and cupped her cheek with his free hand, fingers rough against her skin. "Thank you." He kissed her deeply, carefully, and too briefly, as far as she was concerned. "Will you read some with me?"
"Now?" she asked. It was late, and they had such a big day tomorrow.
"Please?" Determined, Sully led her around the fire to his lean-to, easing down to the ground. He drew her between his legs, leaning back against his chest. It was an intimate position, surrounded by him. Nerves jittered through her, but the overwhelming safety of his arms won out against fear. Slowly she relaxed and let him support her. He wrapped his arms around her and opened to what she'd come to think of as their passage.
As he began to read, she closed her eyes and rested her head on his shoulder. His voice lulled her to peacefulness, the stresses of family and weddings forgotten.
With one hand he held the book, his other arm around her waist, keeping her close to him. She felt the edge of his hand brush against the underside of her breast, but didn't pull away. Everywhere he touched seemed to tingle with anticipation, and for the first time, she was not afraid.
After a while she shifted, her tailbone aching from sitting on the hard ground. She didn't want to go, not yet, and settled more comfortably into his arms. Sully's voice hitched as she leaned back, and she froze when she realized why. She felt it, him, hard against her back and fear raced up once again.
Sensing her tension, Sully set the book aside and wrapped his arms around her waist more fully, holding her close. "This time tomorrow we'll be married." He trailed a line of kisses down her neck, making it hard for her to think clearly.
"I know." She tried not to focus on him, being, well, that way. She knew the clinical definition for what was happening, but somehow that was even more frightening. Saying nothing, she stared into the fire as he rested his cheek against her hair.
"Talk to me, Michaela. You gotta tell me what you're thinkin'." He kept hold of her, voice whispering low and seductive in her ear. "You don't gotta be scared." His lips closed around her earlobe and she moaned softly.
She bit her lip and tried to explain. "I don't know how to put it into words. It's easier to just ignore it."
"It's gonna be pretty hard to ignore tomorrow night." Sully took her hands in his, crossing both of their arms in her lap. "You know I love you and I'd never do anything to hurt you."
"I know that. I do," she emphasized, turning her face to his for a kiss, hoping to distract him from the conversation. She closed her eyes and let her heart swell. For a long moment there was nothing but the soft brush of lips and warmth of his breath on her cheek.
Sully broke the kiss, eyes dark in the firelight. "Tell me what you're afraid of."
Looking back to the fire, she felt the blush return. She knew that if the words came, she'd never be able to say them while looking at him. "It's not that I don't know what happens. I do, of course. I'm a doctor. It's just that…" her voice trailed off, embarrassment stopping her from continuing.
"That what?" Sully prompted. When she didn't answer, he nudged her knee gently. "That what?"
Her answer came in a rush of breath, heart beating fast, words jumbling together. "Well, when you said there were things you couldn't learn from books, I didn't believe you. But the more we've been together, the more I've realized that it is true. And it scares me that what I know, what I've read about, isn't accurate, or isn't enough." She tried to break free from his embrace, but he held on tightly.
"Michaela." Just the way he said her name calmed her and made her heart slow its frenetic pace. "It's not about knowing. It's about feeling." He lifted their joint hands and kissed her knuckles sweetly. "It's about lovin'."
"Still, I just wish I knew more about the particulars. I'm a doctor, for heaven's sake, but all I know is the anatomical function of procreation from a textbook." She couldn't believe she was telling him all of this. Everything she'd kept bottled up inside came spilling out.
"What if you knew?" Sully asked.
Michaela felt her eyes grow wide, her heart speed up again.
Part 2
By: Tess
"I do know, Sully. As adults, you and I both know that a woman's first experience with such matters is usually, somewhat… unpleasant…."
"What if it doesn't have to be?"
Her expression puzzled as her brain quickly researched everything she'd ever read about procreation in medical journals. What else could there be? Every text she'd ever read on the subject factually stated that a woman's first time would be somewhat uncomfortable - painful. There was no getting around that.
"What if there was more to it than just what you're thinkin' and what you've read in your medical books?" he continued. "More to look forward to and less to worry about? Would that help put your mind at ease?"
"I suppose it would." She breathed out a pent breath caused by nerves. "But that's impossible."
"No, it's not," His fingers interlocked with hers as his arms constricted more securely around her; the side of his face pressed intimately against hers. "What if you could experience some of it right now?"
Michaela stiffened. "If I experience what's going to happen between us once we're married - tonight - that wouldn't be proper."
"Not if we don't undress."
She looked at him as if he spoke another language. "You're not making sense."
"It's all about lovin,' Michaela… an' holdin' each other closer than we've ever been before." He squeezed her tenderly then captured her lips, for the moment losing himself in her entrancing femininity.
"We already did that in the new homestead," she reminded him once their lips parted, "When I accidentally found your wedding present to me. Remember?"
"Everyday," Sully confirmed as he grinned at the memory then bestowed soft tender kisses from her neck to the tip of her shoulder through her garment's thin material. Michaela melted submissively against him. Her instinctive reaction foretold her body's willingness. Now if he could just convince her. "Michaela please let me try to help you. I have a feelin' you won't be able to relax and enjoy our wedding day tomorrow, let alone get some sleep tonight, without frettin' about this."
He knew her only too well. She was already fretting. That's why she came to see him tonight. She needed his reassurance. "I'm just afraid that, well… since you're more experienced in such matters… that I won't be… enough for you."
Sully couldn't believe his own ears. Reaching out, he grasped her so he could turn her, pulling her hip snuggly against his body to remind her again of the physical effect she already had on him. "How much more proof do you need?" Warm hands firmly stroked her arms, back, and shoulders now, his need to touch her feeling stronger than ever. He breathed in deeply; drinking in her essence as his arms possessively encircled her again.
Michaela felt tingling shivers with his every caress. Her body reacted quickly to forbidden temptations she'd long resisted…. the need to feel closer to him than ever, increased with lightning speed. Holding back, the doctor in her mind took over once more. "Um… won't this idea of yours make… things… more difficult for you? I mean - as a man.?"
"You let me worry about me." He reassured her and nuzzled her ear again then administered to her neck while his hands increased the intensity of his caresses, attempting to massage her worries away. "Besides," he continued in a slightly huskier tone, "things are already difficult, but it's nothin' I can't deal with."
"But-"
Sully didn't wait for her to finish as his mouth eagerly targeted hers. It was time to put the doctor in her away for awhile. The twelve hours until they wed now felt more like twelve years. He would show her though, without compromising her innocence, just how wonderful this part of married life could be.
Unending fiery kisses continued to heat their bodies, building the passion sparking between them. Michaela's hands mimicked Sully's, traveling possessively over each other's body, but remaining respectful - seeking, learning, caressing… loving. Just like that moment at the new homestead, they found themselves stretched out on the floor, only this time it was on a deerskin in Sully's lean-to. Kissing each other deeply with barely restrained passion, their labored breathing eventually drowned out all familiar night sounds in their wooded surrounding.
Their mouths, mating in a glorious sensual dance, stirred the bride-to-be from her head to her toes. Her senses came alive with keen perception, acknowledging his encompassing masculine scent - a lethal combination of woods, leather, and masculinity. Her awareness of every inch of his muscle-toned body where it met her own, intensified. Never had Sully kissed her with such fervor, nor for this long, and she sank deeper into the ardent feelings threatening to overpower her.
Without breaking the kiss, he shifted his position to hover over her, only this time, his knees gradually worked their way between hers. Surprised, Michaela abruptly pulled her lips from his and pressed a few fingers to his chin, halting their heated embrace. "Sully, I think-"
"Don't think right now," he gently encouraged her then murmured the rest against her love softened mouth, "Just, feel."
As her future husband urgently reclaimed her inviting lips, Michaela's body convinced her mind that resisting him was not an option. People usually feared the unknown and she knew she needed to trust Sully's attempt to calm her nervous apprehension of physical intimacy - a part of married life known only to him. Remembering Sully's promise that they would remain clothed, she trustingly returned her hand to caress his muscular shoulder. When she did, Sully, taking care as to not damage the garment she wore as he knelt upon its thin yet concealing material, carefully adjusted his position. In the blink of an eye, she felt the confirmation of his aroused masculine state nestled snuggly against her most private feminine area. This new awareness startled her, but Sully masterfully continued to kiss her with ardent emotion, distracting her enough that she resumed their rapturous embrace without hesitation. Once he felt her acceptance of this new position, he gently pressured himself against her lower body enticing the core of her sexuality to welcome his presence.
Accompanying the molten liquid heat which swiftly gathered low in her belly, surging sexual tensions made themselves known despite the material barriers between them. What was happening to her? She never read about THIS in a medical textbook. While absorbing the awareness of new tingling sensations, she drew a few ragged breaths, turning her head as Sully paid homage to the area just beneath her jaw-line and witnessed a reflection of the moment. The shadows they cast from the fire against the back flap of Sully's lean-to showed no trace of innocence. If she hadn't witnessed it herself, she'd be certain those shadows belonged to a man and a woman in the "biblical sense." Internal heat now radiated through her and it had nothing to do with the fire. This personal inferno they intentionally kindled grew more furious by the moment.
As Sully maintained full awareness and focus on Michaela's mounting passion, he suddenly felt her body grow rigid beneath him. Properly supporting most of his own weight only increased the pleasurable friction he felt down below where their bodies meshed intimately against each other. Tomorrow, after the wedding, they would be free to love each other completely, but right now it was his future wife's experience that he concentrated on, and she was fighting her body's own natural response. He had to help put her at ease. "Michaela…," her name reverberated as a desire-laced sigh. "It's alright," he breathed out as gently as he could in his escalating amorous state. "Just relax - don't fight it." Realizing that she needed a longer momentary breather while she became accustomed to this new heightened level of physical intimacy, his lips tugged sensuously at her ear then trailed down her neck, sustaining her current level of ecstasy. Gently moving his hips would have a similar effect, too, but he didn't want to chance losing his own self-control.
"I… I don't know what I'm feeling," she admitted breathlessly. "It's almost frightening."
Sully combed his fingers lovingly through her hair in an attempt to calm her fears. "What you're feelin' is natural. I feel it, too," he assured her. "Just go with it." Their eyes, darkened with ardent emotion, caught then and the uncertainty he witnessed in her expression vanished within the next breath. He understood that look - she was close to going over the edge... and if he wasn't careful, he would soon be too. Feeding her body's fiery responsiveness while gazing lovingly into her passion-glazed eyes, he traced a heated path down her side and over her hip, molding her shapely feminine form. While maintaining intimate masculine pressure against her most sensitive feminine area, he vowed his lower body to remain still. Deeply intense kisses and caresses were all that he would allow… for tonight.
Sully's last words echoed over and over in Michaela's head. "Just go with it." She trusted him implicitly. She was experiencing sexual tensions that she never imagined, never read about for women… never felt before, and yet they remained fully clothed. Even Sully's wandering hands with their purposeful caresses remained respectful, never once crossing the line. He made it easy for her to trust him in future marital issues that greatly concerned her and along with that trust, Michaela allowed herself to begin relinquishing her absolute self-control. Winding her fingers through his wavy hair, she encouraged their savory kisses to deepen again, this time becoming so vehement that they awakened even stronger internal erotic sensations. Her heart beat faster than ever before as her lungs fought to draw in sufficient air. Her world within Sully's arms started to spin. She never imagined losing control could feel so good. Suddenly, a raging force within fervently erupted, threatening to claim her. As it encompassed her completely she began to writhe in passionate abandon beneath her husband-to-be, unconsciously uttering soft echoes of pleasure while gripping his shoulders again and again, pulling him to her with a fierceness she never felt before.
Nothing Sully ever imagined could have prepared himself for this moment. Her instinctive natural reaction to her first extremely intimate experience threatened to overpower the last remnants of his self-control. And then her hips moved. "Michaela… don't…," he pleaded, then gasped for air.
But Michaela, imprisoned by her body's own ardent intensity, wasn't listening. Just go with it. Involuntarily, her back arched and her knees bent, thighs pressed in at his sides as wave after wave of the most powerful yet pleasurable pulsing sensations vibrated through her innocence. Her hands clenching at Sully's shoulders matched the rhythmic tilting of her hips, rippling her body, and she unknowingly rocked Sully's world.
Unable to utter another decipherable word once Michaela moved reflexively against him, he grasped her shoulders in a feeble attempt to stabilize her motions. It didn't work. A guttural groan emanated from deep within his throat as he surrendered to volcanic carnal forces he could no longer hold back. This was not supposed to happen. Their chaste, yet greatly impassioned, near-love-making session consumed them in a thunderous rapture, taking them both by surprise.
In the quiet euphoric aftermath of this very amorous close encounter, they snuggled together, face to face, legs entwined, cherishing the presence of the other. Only slow deeply relaxed breaths and frequent loving caresses communicated the unspoken thoughts between them. Once Michaela acquired enough courage to look into the eyes of her soon-to-be husband, she felt taken aback by the depth of love his gaze revealed. Reaching out, he touched her face and a feeling of cherishment washed over her.
"I love you," he told her in a soft whisper.
"I love you, too." If this experience was just a small taste of what the real wedding night would reveal to be, then Michaela knew without a doubt she had nothing to fear. Physical love proved to be even more incredible than she ever imagined.
Feeling depleted of nearly all his strength, it took everything Sully had left just to breathe. His experimental idea worked well – too well. He felt embarrassed. Now, what could he say to her? Surely she realized he'd lost control. Touching her chin with a gentle finger, he felt compelled to ask, "So ya still wanna marry me?"
"Of course I do." She smiled easily at him in an attempt to hide her own embarrassment of her previous uncontrolled actions. "Now…" her voice trailed off.
"Now?"
"Now… possibly even… more than ever," she honestly yet meekly admitted. Despite the dimming fire, her blush with her admission grew more evident by the minute.
Sully lavished a slow sensuous kiss on her already ravished lips. Her words were music to his ears. She wasn't afraid anymore. As he kissed her with leisurely ease, his conscious gnawed at him. There was something he needed to admit to her, but before he could, Michaela broke the silence.
"Sully… is it… I mean… well… I didn't know… um… will it always… be like, that?"
Her inexperience endeared her to him even more. "Um'mm," he confirmed and planted a gentle kiss to her forehead. "Sometimes even better." To educate her further to his meaning, he gently slipped his thumb beneath the material covering her shoulder and tenderly stroked her bare skin. It wouldn't be long before they really got to know each other.
Michaela's face flushed at the thought. She couldn't even imagine, yet she now anticipated their full marital union with anxious enthusiasm.
Shifting slightly, Sully forced himself to look into her eyes, his tone low and serious, "Michaela, there's somethin'… I-ah… need to apologize to ya for."
"Apologize?"
His eyes shifted briefly. "For not keepin'… things… under better control - I'm sorry."
"You mean… that… wasn't supposed to…"
Sully shook his head, humbly admitting, "I thought I could handle it."
Michaela, remembering the information available in her medical texts, blushed knowingly.
Pushing his pride aside, his next thought sprouted a subtle grin. "Remember when you said you were worried that you wouldn't… be enough for me?" He cupped her face with such tenderness, he nearly touched her soul. "Well… if you really needed absolute proof that you are more than enough woman for me - I think you just got it."
Michaela kissed him soundly then. All doubts now a thing of the past and her fear of their wedding night, her first experience of complete physical intimacy, she now put into perspective. After breaking this kiss, she gazed lovingly into her future husband's adoring eyes feeling a confidence in an area of their relationship she never felt before. "Thank you, Sully."
In appreciation, he contentedly rested his forehead against hers, his thumb sweetly gliding across her cheek. God, how he treasured this woman.
"It's getting late," she reluctantly reminded him.
"And we have a big day tomorrow."
"I better head home."
"I'll walk ya." He softly brushed her lips with his. "Just give me a minute - I need to tend to somethin'."
Figuring it out, she blushed profusely - again. Surely she'd be the most blushing bride ever if she allowed her thoughts during her wedding day to drift into her anticipation of their wedding night.
Part 3
By: Jewelianna
It was a quiet stroll through the woods until they reached the back of her barn.
"Dream of me," he asked, raising her hand to his lips for a farewell kiss.
"I will. I can't believe we're going to be married in only a few hours."
Sully stepped away, still smiling. "Goodnight," was all he said as he faded into the trees.
Inside the homestead she quietly changed into her nightgown and slipped under the covers. Visions of Sully clouded her brain as she tried to sleep, overpowering any worry about wedding plans or family nuisances. The sooner the wedding was over, the sooner she could see him like that again. Eventually, she drifted to sleep.
When the rooster crowed the next morning, Michaela woke with a smile. She had indeed dreamt of him, and it was going to be a glorious day.