Did you know you were going to die that day? Or were you like the rest of us, sure that you would live forever?
The rain poured hard the day we laid Dani Moonstar to rest. The earth had come to claim one of its brightest and beautiful creatures. The black sedan stopped at the road while four figures clad in black got out, preparing to say good bye to one of their own. Cannonball lent support to a distraught Karma while Sunspot provided Wolfsbane the necessary strength to do the unthinkable- help lay a best friend to rest in eternal peace. The green tent that provided shelter for the black cold casket drove home like a shot to the heart to Cannonball that someone who was closer to him than he never knew possible would never watch his back again. Would never provide him words of encouragement when he blew it. A shining star in this world of blackness was gone forever.
If you had known that you would be drawing your last breath, would you have stayed in your bed and hide. No, that was never your way was it, dear spirit?
Before long, the tent was full of loved ones and those that admired the lost light. The minister spoke beautiful encouraging words, but it felt dull and empty to all those who had fought and bled by her side. Her death felt like an empty meaningless event compared to how she lived. A life so full snuffed out like a freshly lit candle that was only learning how to burn. One by one, the new mutants who had gone on to other things went by her final resting place laying one red rose to pay tribute to one who loved with her whole heart. The last two were Sam and Rahne and it was hard to tell who was crying more.
If I had known you would be leaving us on that day, I would have made sure to tell you how much you mattered to life, to my life. But Death is a cruel entity that way not giving us the chance to say good bye before striking down those we love the most.
After the funeral, those that had been touched profoundly by such a brilliant heart gathered at the Xavier's Institute. The gloom and pall made any real try at levity ring hollow for even the most jovial of students cared too much to ignore the pain of their loss, of this passing. Professor Xavier locked himself away in his study to pay penance for leading such an innocent life to such a horrible death after too short a life. The new mutants and their friends who joined them in Xforce gathered together to lend strength to each other in their common bond and pain. The xmen each dealt with how they felt in their own way, remembering times spent with Dani, remembering times touched by Dani. Not once but many times over the course of that day, there were tears shed and not a dry eye could be found, such was the magnitude of the life led by she who called herself Moonstar.
If I had known what lay at the end of that hallway, I would have gladly gone in your stead. But I was trying to do the best thing for the team so I sent you to your death, for that I am sorry.
Three weeks went by before any of xforce was able to leave the mansion and return to normal life. Cable, because of his experience with death, brought together a new force to provide the coverage that xforce normally would provide. Xforce was given a wing in the mansion all their own after the first night found the surviving members congregating in one room where they stayed the whole night. Xavier avoided the wing with a type of tenderness that was mixed with concern and guilt. Finally, family members were asked to intervene lest this one loss take all the others down with it. Sam's mother and brothers and sisters attended to him and tabatha will care and patience. Karma's brother and sister, now restored showed Xian that there was something worth living on for. Domino took under her wing Rictor, Shatterstar, and Proudstar while Banshee provided his daughter the kind of fatherly love that showed her she would make it through. Ms. DaCosta provided Sunspot the type of care that only a mother could give long overdue. Once all were taken in by family members and loved ones, healing could begin, if only they would have time to heal. If only the shadow of their friend's death did not foretell another tragedy to come. Before the month was up, another former New Mutant would be placed to rest.
I never did get to tell you that I once had a crush on you, did I? I was young, you were young. You were also beautiful and the most caring soul I had ever met. I didn't tell you because I was afraid. I was afraid you'd say no, afraid that you would let it come between us, our friendship. So, I hid it until that day when you admitted that just once you wished some guy would have asked you out. Would ask you out. You were afraid that you scared them away because of your strength. That might have been so, but it was my weakness, not yours. I would have told you the very next day. The day after we were attacked. It was your birthday after all, and I wanted to give you a wonderful birthday present. The present of being loved of being needed. Instead the birthday present I gave you was the last thing you would get. The present that took you away from all before you really knew just how important you really were. I'm sorry.
Sam