"For the Sake of my Family"

This fic was written as somewhat of a companion piece for my still unfinished Neji fic "To Fly," but can still be read independantly. It is simply a short look at the events surrounding Hyuuga Hizashi's decision to give his life for the sake of the Hyuuga clan. Spoilers up to episode 63 or manga chapter 105.

I usually don't use Japanese often in my fics and there is a tiny bit in this one, so offered at the bottom are translations.

Please read and review, I love to hear reactions and constructive criticism is very welcome. Thanks everyone.

-sor

I had only just settled at the kitchen table, an untouched cup of tea fast growing cold in front of me. Nights had seemed so long as of late and for the past two weeks sleep had been elusive. I had only just tucked Neji in for the night, leaving his door slightly ajar in case he should wake. Never had the boy had a restless night before they had branded him, but now he woke nearly every evening in tears, crying softly into his pillow but never calling out for me. He was learning, as we all did, to quiet our tears with hate.

He had been asleep for only a quarter of an hour when the knock came. I had been lost in thought, staring into the dim reflection in my tea, watching the dark liquid ripple and steam with a quiet fascination. It was better than thinking of all the things that had happened. I felt at that moment that I couldn't take another instant of worry over the fate of the village and of the clan. True, I found it greatly amusing that the main family had suffered such a humiliation, that an enemy shinobi could make his way within our walls and lay his hands on the heiress without so much as a whisper of interference. However, that did not mean I didn't have sense enough to know that events were taking a turn for the worst.

It was only when the knock sounded again that I realized I had lost myself in my thoughts once more and I moved quickly to open it before the noise woke Neji. I wasn't sure who to expect at such an hour but if I'd had any guesses, it certainly would not have been the man I found standing on the threshold. A man who only ever knocked on my door when he intended to demand one thing or another from me.

"Otou-sama."

I nodded slowly, politely in that deferential manner which he liked to see from the branch family, and stepped aside, allowing him to enter. I did not offer him refreshments, as would have been proper, but it was not a courtesy he expected of me, so there was no pointless scolding.

"It's late." I closed the door behind him and stepped away, keeping my voice low for the sake of the sleeping Neji. "This couldn't wait until morning?"

"Word has come from Kumogakure." I saw immediately the change in father when he spoke. Despite being trained all his life to let show no clear indication of emotion, I saw in him now the first hints of uncertainty. "Hokage-sama delivered it personally an hour ago and we spoke in length about the Raikage's request."

Suspicion began to form nearly even before he opened his mouth, but at the mention of Kumogakure, my stomach began to churn. The entire clan had known all along there would be repercussions and yet we had not dared speculate what those repercussions may be. There had been whisperings of war among the lesser members of the clan, but the perpetrators of those rumors were quick to silence themselves when a person of authority was nearby.

"And what has all this to do with me that you would disturb me after my son is in bed?" I stepped away, moving towards Neji's door with the intention to pull it to. If he woke, I did not want him to hear such business. It wasn't Neji's place to worry over things when he had his own troubles to work through. However, I paused in his doorway, my hand on the door knob. The light from the lamps outside filtered through a crack in his curtains and a dull stream of yellow spread out over his peaceful features. It was not a sight I had seen in weeks, my son's face peaceful and impassive. So why now must this disturbance come?

Seemingly out of nowhere, father was at my side, peering into the room as well, though his face showed nothing but blatant indifference. After all, my son was nothing to him. This was not a child who would ever lead the clan.

After a moment of silence, he spoke again, though his eyes remained focused on Neji. "The Raikage proclaims that he will declare war once more should his demands not be satisfied. In his words, the honor of Konoha is in question due to our 'traitorous actions' and there is only one way to atone for our wrongdoing." I observed the tension in his brows increase tenfold and I wondered briefly how the old man managed to look so angry and so calm all in the same moment. "Raikage demands blood for blood. He demands Sandaime-sama send the corpse of Hyuuga Hiashi."

It became clear then why he had come and I could not help but smirk at the transparency of it all. I did not respond right away, however, but simply closed the door to Neji's room. These were things he would do best not to hear.

"Such transparent tactics." I meant both my father and the Raikage. "But effective." I stepped away from Neji's door, moving past the old man in a way that our shoulders nearly met, but I did not dare risk such an effrontery when he was in such a mood. Besides, the situation was grim enough, to say the least. "And sending Hiashi-sama is not an option, of course." I was certain such a thought had not once crossed his mind.

"Kumogakure seeks only to gain our secrets." He continued to state the obvious.

I could feel the old man's eyes on me as I crossed to the room to the window. There were hints of hesitation in his voice and I took advantage of those gaps in order to hopefully set him off balance. "I do not care if all our secrets are revealed. Perhaps then we would not need to guard them so fiercely."

The faint presence of his reflection in the window showed his reaction. Brows creased severely, but like all Hyuuga, his response remained minimal. His words were calm and his tone perfectly noncommital. "You tread too close to the line, Hizashi. You would do well to remember to whom you speak."

"I have not forgotten, otou-sama." I was on the verge of deferring to him once more and allowing him control over the conversation when a realization struck me. Thus, with a newfound foothold, I turned to face him. "Though I doubt you would kill me now. My value has increased significantly, has it not?"

The anger in his eyes was subtle, but obvious to one who knew the signs. "Now is not the time for your willful disobedience, Hizashi." He did not avert his gaze, but rather it seemed to turn inward, as if he argued with himself over some matter of pride. With Hyuuga it was always a matter of pride; it did not take our clan's gift of insight to know this. Still, even we Hyuuga can at times put pride aside and speak candidly. It simply came as a surprise that my father, the noble leader of our clan, would honor me with such a rare gift. "Whatever conflict lies between you and I, it does not transcend these troubles.

"You resent me, as you resent your brother, because fate smiled upon him where it pushed you aside. It is only natural that you have such feelings." He stepped closer, attempting to appeal to me with a gesture of affection, a hand placed carefully upon my shoulder. "But you are a man, Hizashi. Is it not time to put such childish jealousy behind you?"

"Jealousy?" I nearly laughed. The hand upon my shoulder was shrugged aside and once more I stepped away, maintaining the distance between my father and me, a distance we had maintained since I was a boy. "Of course you would see in such simple terms. You could not possibly understand the injustice we..."

"Justice!" It was the first time I had heard his voice rise to such levels in some time and it shocked me into silence long enough for him to continue in more level tones. "Do you still believe the Hyuuga Clan concerns itself with justice?" There came no change in his tone, though it seemed, if only for an instant, the anger in his eyes softened. "Do you think it was my wish to see my sons placed at odds with one another? Do you still believe it was my wish to see my son sealed and made a member of the branch family? That, Hizashi, is the burden we bear as members of the main family."

So often I had heard them speak of the burdens of the main family and always I had scoffed at such a thought. I felt no pity for the burden of leadership, for in the end, all its difficulties were balanced by one simple fact. They were free.

Sensing my resistance, he went on, and I heard now in his voice something completely foreign – concern. "Hizashi, what more can I say? As Hyuuga it is our duty, each in our own way, to protect the clan and the village. It is a duty we were all burdened with the moment we were born Hyuuga and it is a duty we cannot abandon, no matter our own feelings."

It was then I found myself at a loss. Despite my desire to bitterly refute his words, nothing escaped my lips save a soft breath. What could one say at a time like this?

Sensing the conflict, my father bowed his head for a moment and when his gaze met mine again it was as cold and empty as ever. Had the concern in his eyes been only my imagination?

He did not bother with formality, but simply turned away, seeing himself out with no demands that I accompany him to the door. "We will speak again in the morning." And without so much as a farewell, he was gone, leaving me completely alone with my thoughts.

Duty. It was a word I knew well, a word that was as much a part of the Hyuuga vocabulary as destiny. It was the duty of our clan not only to use our strength to protect and defend Konoha, but to protect that strength, guarding it against those that would use it against us. From the time a Hyuuga was old enough to speak, he was instructed in his duty and as far back as I can remember, my duty had always been to protect Hiashi.

Even before I had been sealed on our third birthday, I had known our destinies were divided by a great chasm. Hiashi was destined to lead and I to protect. Hiashi was destined to be the proud face of the clan, admired by the village and trained in all our most deadly techniques; I was destined to watch from the sidelines as he grew stronger.

Father was right; I was jealous.

With the door closed firmly behind him, out of habit I returned to the table and my tea, which had long since grown cold. Gazing again at my distorted reflection, it seemed almost as if it were Hiashi gazing back. Faced with my brother's unwavering gaze I was forced to consider the possibility that in a few days' time, my brother might be dead. It was an unfair thing Kumogakure had demanded of him and yet I knew immediately that he would not hesitate to do as they asked. What man would not give his life for the sake of his child and his village?

Yet what could come of Hiashi's death? War would be averted, yes, but with that would come a time of great strain for the clan. With the heir dead, our father could not pass down leadership as he had been longing to for some time. The line of succession would fall to Hinata, a girl of three who showed little promise. Father would be forced to retain leadership, but he was old and growing weaker. To place the clan's future on the shoulders of an old man far past his prime was suicide.

If only I were able to succeed...

Slowly my shoulders began to shake as my hand rose of its own volition to rest against my forehead. It took some time to recognize through the haze that had so quickly settled over me, that I was shaking with laughter. How blatantly unfair destiny could be. Were I able to succeed, Hiashi could do his duty and be sure to leave the clan in strong, capable hands.

But I could not succeed. A preposterous thought - a clan leader who could be killed with a simple hand seal.

So things were clear now, were they not? The future of Hyuuga depended upon Hiashi and in turn, the future of Konohagakure depended upon Hyuuga. The village's strongest clan could not fall to such an injustice. To do so would only put us at the eventual mercy of Kumogakure, for if they were to attain Byakugan it would be tantamount to opening our gates to their attack.

Yes, things were perfectly clear.

For the sake of Hyuuga and of Konoha, I would have to die.

While my will remained strong, I set about seeing immediately to the most important matters. A trio of empty scrolls were retrieved from the cabinet beside the door and I settled once more at the table. The first letter was addressed to my father's brother, Haruki, who had until several years ago been the highest ranking member of the branch family and upon my death, would be again. This was a letter of formality, begging his forgiveness for laying such a burden on his aging shoulders, but asking that he resume his duties until Neji had come of age. And more importantly, I asked that he take Neji into his home and teach him the things he must know in order to nurture the strength within him.

The second letter was for Neji. I spoke to him of my choice and the true reason behind it while the thoughts were still fresh in my own mind. It was imperative that Neji know these things. I could not have my son waste so many years trapped in the haze of hatred that had held me for so long. The future of Hyuuga depended greatly upon the strength of our youth and as I had determined already, the strength of Hyuuga lay in Neji.

I placed the pen aside for a moment, stretching and bending my tired fingers. Fatigue threatened to take me, though I feared I would not be able to find rest that night. Besides, there was still one final letter to write. So I took up the pen once more and after a moment of awkward hesitation began my final letter.

Hiashi-oni-sama,

I have little time left and much I feel must be said. Enclosed is a letter for Neji that I intrust to your capable hands. When he has grown some, I ask you to deliver this by your own hand. This is my final request of you, my older brother. I would also ask of you that you read this letter and know my mind, for I would not have you live without knowing my reasons.

It is for your sake, aniue, that I do this and for Neji's. For this single moment, main family and branch family hold no meaning. This is a moment I would wish you to understand, as well. The rift must be mended. We can no longer be a family defined by pride and divided by hatred. Destiny may have determined our rank, aniue, but perhaps there is something more that you do not yet see. The strength of Hyuuga is no longer the main family's alone. You must mend the rift or I fear the true strength of Hyuuga may remain locked away forever behind the curse seal.

I entrust you with this future I have died to protect.

By the time my pen had finally stilled there were faint traces of light beginning to peek through the trees in the garden beyond my window. Slowly as the light grew brighter and the morning shadows began to stretch out over the flowers, my eyes found a solitary figure slowly moving along the stone paths. His gait was halting and tired and in this moment I saw my father as he truly was, a frail old man struggling beneath the weight of his burden.

A low fog had settled heavily over the gardens when I emerged from my rooms. No doubt it would burn away within the hour, long before the Hokage's planned arrival that would signal the time of my final duty to the clan. It was a shame; I liked the fog. It seemed to shroud the world in a quiet peace and it made one forget things like duty and fate and simply allow himself to exist, to wander in a world all his own. I was glad for that this morning, and more so for the fact that I might, just this once, meet otou-sama there.

I found him beneath the boughs of a sakura tree. A gust of wind had shaken the branches and left a sea of pink blossoms on the path beneath. Standing there among the floating petals, he seemed a bit taller, the aged stoop gone from his posture. He had sensed my approach and made haste to hide his weakness. Did he ever show Hiashi his weaker side, I wondered.

"Otou-sama." As he turned to face me, I bent low in the most formal bow I could offer, an honor I had not granted him in years, and had never granted in sincerity. But today was different. Now, at the end, it only seemed endlessly petty to offer him insult at whatever chance I could. I wanted to greet him with the respect and formality his position deserved, if only just this once.

I saw the change in his eyes for only an instant, but his gaze softened just as it had when we last spoke, but the expression was gone all to quickly when he bowed his head in acknowledgment of my greeting. Formal as our actions may have seemed to outsiders, there were meanings behind them that only Hyuuga would know. It was not required for the clan leader to even acknowledge the branch family. Not only had my father acknowledged me, as he had failed to do on so many other occasions, but he offered a greeting more respectful than any branch member might ever hope to receive.

For the very first time, there was no anger in the air between us.

"You seek me out so early, Hizashi? It seems sleep has eluded us both." It came as a brief surprise when the silence was shattered and the world seemed to return to its normal state.

I nodded faintly as I drew nearer, stopping at his side beneath the sakura tree. "There are things that must be said and my mind would not find rest until it is done." I drew the scrolls carefully from my belt and extended them to him. "I would ask you deliver these in my stead once all is said and done. I fear Hiashi-sama would offer argument were he to read this before I die."

Father stood still as stone for a moment before slowly taking the pair of scrolls and tucking them safely away. "Of course, Hizashi."

Despite our sudden ability to remain civil with one another, we were both uncharacteristically uncertain of ourselves. Thus, a weighted silence fell over us once more, seemingly made more crushing by the confines of the fog that surrounded us. I had gone over in my mind many times the things I wished to say to him, but as always, the words died on my tongue. Even now, I feared his reaction to what would still be defiance. Defiance of a different sort, but defiance nonetheless.

In the end it was my father who broke the silence yet again, speaking in softer tones than were his usual. Softer, but no less stern. "Have you decided? Will you do your duty willingly and lay down your life for the protection of the main family?"

The peace between us faded in an instant and it took a moment for me to gather myself and speak, fighting to maintain a level tone. There were things he needed to understand before our amenity was utterly shattered. "If this were a choice decided only by my status as a member of the branch family, I would never willingly lay down my life."

I could see, even watching as I was out of the corner of my eye, that the tension had returned and his brow had creased. Just as I had expected, the old man did not understand. How strange that even despite the weight pressing down upon us, I managed to smile. Now that I had taken the first, most difficult step, it seemed almost impossible that I had hesitated before. "Please do not relate this choice to the main family or the destiny of the Hyuuga. This is my own choice, a decision I made not as a member of the branch family, but as your son and as Hiashi's brother."

I found myself turning to face him. Never before had I been able to speak such blatant defiance while looking him in the eye, but now things were different. His tension had eased and his anger all but fled. He was watching me with a warmth and pride I had only ever seen for my brother. Could it be possible that he had finally found cause to be proud of me as well?

Filled with a new confidence, I turned fully to face him, plunging forward before I somehow lost my nerve in the face of his sudden affectionate expression. "As a member of this family and a shinobi of this village... If my death can save the lives of my family and my village, I would gladly give it."

He said nothing for some time after and I was content to stand at his side, watching as the mist burned away in the morning sun. I could feel the heat on my back as light crept through the branches above. Perhaps it was the comfort of the sunlight or my fatigued body that caused my eyes to close, but I was brought back to myself by the added pressure of a hand upon my shoulder.

He did not look at me, but that hardly mattered any longer. I understood the reasons and would not ask him to compromise his own pride. "If that is the case, Hizashi, I will accept your sacrifice, not as the leader of this clan," It was then, finally, that he looked my way and in his eyes I found the pride that until now had been reserved only for Hiashi. "...but as your father."

We might have embraced had we been other men, but that was not the way of the Hyuuga. There were other ways of understanding the connection between two souls and in that brief moment, in my father's eyes, I had understood. All the words left unspoken had been there in that glance, a silence full of meaning that only Hyuuga eyes could comprehend. This was enough.

"Thank you, chichiue."

Yes, this was enough.

otou-sama - father - a very formal way of addressing the father, similar to "Lord Father"

oni-sama - older brother - similar to otou-sama, "Lord Brother"

aniue - older brother - a respectful way of addressing the older brother that would be simply translated as "brother." It is still polite, but more familiar than oni-sama.

chichiue - father - similar to aniue, simply translated as "father."