Renesmee
1. apologizes
Fourteen years isn't a good age to get yourself into a relationship with a person which is almost your mom's age, and that either way, seems to be ten years younger. That is just not something usual.
Besides everything, even that person is a mythical creature y is your natural enemy, been tied to that single person with something more powerful tan love, isn't something usual either.
It is no way common be a vampire half human and been tied to a werewolf, the same my mother love but still decided to marry my dad.
Bella seeing me with ashamed and jealous eyes when I am with Jacob and him getting mad because, even he's imprinted with me, he still loves her and can't help it, hurts and pretty deeply.
That… my life. Mi life was weird, so weird. It was weird and pretty painful.
I've always known I'm not as any of the other boys and girls of my age. Been in the second semester of High School when I should been studying seventh grade isn't something that people need to pass through. Every boy looks at me while I'm walking through the high school sidewalks or in the streets. Of course, they look at Bella too, unbelievable young to be my mom and amazingly beautiful.
After all, I've never been normal, neither as human nor as vampire. I don't need blood so I can get related with any person without feeling weak. I can cry and, if I want it, I could get pregnant. I'm not a normal human either because, besides I have a superior intelligence, I look older than I am, what made possible to me to get into the Elementary before I was one year.
I was thinking on those entire things that made me different than the rest of the world and making homework – been focus on both – when I heard Bella getting close to my bedroom's door carefully, for some reason I didn't understand. She opened it just a bit before calling me.
"Hi, Nessie. Are you too busy?"
"No, I'm just doing homework, but I can do it latter. ¿What's going on?"
"Nothing, I just want to spend some time with you. I know we're not paying you attention because of my weird vampire—pregnancy and then Rebicce, but I want you to know that we're not forgetting you, we still seeking you."
Ugh. Bella's vampire-pregnancy. It had never happened. A vamp had never got pregnant, but, well, since my mom got pregnant of me everything became weird— like Jake imprinting me, Seth imprinting Tanya, Leah Jacob, Emmett's new-gift, Bella's faint…—. The worse part was that the new baby wasn't Edward's but Jacob's. That hurt even more than the inattention.
Edward almost beheaded Jacob when Bella told him what had happened, that she was pregnant besides all.
This happened after Jacob saw Aunt Rosalie — thinking she was the other vampire kind – when we were together in the forest. Bella's worry leaved them… there. And then Rebicce birth, my half-sister.
"Don't worry, Bella, I know this all is new for everyone" I narrowed my eyes, wrinkled, and take a deep breath, "Besides, Rebicce needs more attention than I do. Really, don't worry about me.
"Nessie, I know this is so difficult for you. I have apologized thousand of times for what I did to Edward and you, I will never forgive myself. I really so very sorry, it wasn't something I could take care of. It just happened and…— she sighed. I knew she had been self-torturing all the time and I didn't like to see her suffering that much.
"Bella, stop apologizing, we all make mistakes. I swear you there's no spite, not on myself and I'm sure there's not on Edward's either. He loves you too much for not forgiving you." I told her in a begging voice.
My parent's story was something fascinating to me. It was surrealist someone could love another person as Edward did Bella, so much that he never let the thirst and desire for Bella's blood drive himself. Even the time they were far is an essential part of their love, their lives and mine. It was a romantic, special, single, and unforgettable story. Of those memories my mother remain from her human life, the most significant were those moments she had been with Edward. They used to call them 'remains of twilight'. I knew their story form the begging through the end by hard, with each every little detail – even those I didn't wanted to know about, some by Uncle Emmett and Aunt Rose's words and some others by Alice's. "Besides, Jacob and you love each other and I can't blame any of you for that.
"Hun, Jake imprinted you and besides he is in love with you, he would never let someone hurt you. He has been here every single day begging for your pardon. He's so tormented too. I know maybe I'm asking you too much but I think you should forgive him; it hurts me seeing you both in pain because of this. At least hear what he has to say, give him just one minute to explain you, to apologize. If after all you decide not to forgive him…" she sighed. "That'll be just your business."
"If I'm with Jacob — I was or whatever— it wasn't just because the imprint thing, Bella. I do love him. I don't really know if I should forgive him. My love is non-magical, is common love, the single common thing I have."
"I know it, sweetheart, that's why I am asking this to you. Jacob is down stairs, he wants to talk to you. ¿Do you want me to let him come in?
"Hum…I don't know. Tell him…" I really missed him, "I'm coming."
"Okay." She got up, but then she turned to me again wrinkling her eyebrows. "Renesmee, if you don't want to talk to him there's no problem. I'm sure he'll understand."
"I know, but I wanna listen to your advice. That's what friends do, and we're friends, aren't we?" I grinned.
"I thing that is quite reasonable and non-rude form your part." She grinned too and then she was gone.
It was really hard for me to understand that my mother and my boyfriend had been involved in that kind of relationship, and that besides they had procreated a daughter. They have been in love with each other since too-long-ago, and I though that was assumed by both parts, I though that was why Bella decided to marry Edward.
I decided to go downstairs to see him. I really missed him. I haven't seen him nor talk to him since I new Bella was pregnant.
"Ness!" he screamed when he saw me. "You have no idea of how happy I am of seeing you again of talking to you."
"Yeah, sure." Was all I said as I try to hide the great joy I felt when I meet his dark and beautiful eyes. "Let's go and talk up, in my room. Do you mind?" I told Jacob but then asked Edward. Bella and he were hand in hand, in a love gesture.
"Sure." He give me one of those grins I loved so much, those that make me smile too.
"Leech, Bella; It was a great pleasure to greet you, excuse me." he said in a fake-kind-tone that made me laugh, more than that I roared in laughter. Edward saw me with funny eyes. It had been too much ago since I laughed like this the last time.
"Sorry, dad." I apologized without stopping my laugh.
"Don't worry." He told me and then he turned to face Jacob. "You must take care of my baby. Did you hear me, mongrel?"
"Of course, Mr. Fangs." He agreed; I laughed again, lower this time.
I walked him through my room to talk to him with more privacy, although in this house you couldn't say a word without everyone in heard it. Either way I closed the door to have fewer echoes, at least. I grimaced to let him sit down in the bed while I closed it and then I went to sit next to him.
"What's going on, Jacob?" I asked sighing.
"Ness, I swear I really regret of what happened with your mom."
"Maybe you regret, but she doesn't. Your baby —Rebicce— isn't guilty of anything."
"She's regretful too. Renesmee, you know all we have pass through. We just loose control of ourselves. I'm an idiot, I'm the blame, you shouldn't be mad at Bella."
"She told me it was her who seduced you." I told him raising my eyebrows and looking down; it was so hard to say. "Look, I can't keep spite to Bella, she's my mom, and if I'm alive it is thanks to her." He looked down misunderstanding me, he though I could keep spite to him, so I hurry to change my words," But neither to you, because I love you. It's not your fault that I have interfered in your lives."
"¡Oh, no! No, Nessie. I'm not going to allow you to blame yourself for this. It was our fault… my fault and I accept I commented the biggest mistake in my life.
"I'm not blaming myself; I'm just saying the truth. Besides, I think it doesn't hurt that bad now. I have assumed you love each other and that would never change." I said trying to stop the tears that fight against my no-tears will.
"Let me hold your hand."
"Beatles?" I tried to joke.
"Too funny." He didn't even smile.
"What for?" I asked dismayed.
"I wanna know if you think what you're saying."
"Oh…" I growled. "Okay." He took my hand and put it against his cheek. I try to concentrate in no thinking in the pain I felt, but that just make me remember it even more. Suddenly, he let my hand fall under his, and then he let his bug and hot hand fall on the bed. He opened his eyes and looked into mine with his full of blame and pain.
"Nessie, I'm so very sorry. I never though this would infringe so much pain to you. Edward was right in not letting me see you and protest me whatever he wants.
"What? He protested you? Why?"
"Calm down, I deserve it."
"No, Jacob, you…Ah!" I growled. "Why in the world… Who he thinks he is?!"
"I'm not defending him — you know I wouldn't — but he's your father."
"Ah…" I growled again.
"Calm down, Nessie." He told me taking my hand again.
"I'm sorry, it's just that I hate when he puts in that role." I told him.
"Renesmee Carlie Cullen, is that what you really think?"
"What are you talking about?" I asked.
"Do you really thing Bella is going to divorce Edward to be with me? Nessie, your parents love, adore each other. Bella is Edward's entire life, Edward is Bella's and you're mine.
"Jake… I know you love Bella and she loves you. If you love me it's only because I'm part of her, that's the single reason."
"Of course it's not, if I love you it's because your part of me, you are my life. My feelings for you have nothing to do with imprint. Besides your father could never leave Bella again, he wouldn't make her suffer in anyway, much less after what happened in Italy."
"You're wrong." I said taking my hand away from his, "I'm gonna tell you something just Emmett and I know." It was difficult to talk about this to Jacob. It was unbelievable to even think that Edward had been disloyal to Bella. "One time, talking with Edward happened something weird. We were really absorbed into the chat, but when I hold him something really odd happened. Our both gifts went the opposite… they inverted." There were no words to describe what had happen that occasion.
"The gifts inverted?" He asked doubtfully, "How?"
"Listen, this is difficult to explain so, please, pay attention." He nodded wrinkling, and then took a lock of my hair and settled it behind my ear, "You know Edward's gift is to 'listen' other's thoughts and mine is to 'show' my thoughts to any person I touch, don't you?"
"Yeah, you're the opposite."
"Yeah, well, that time, when I hugged him I could see everything he was thinking, well, it wasn't really just what he was thinking in that precisely moment, but everything he have thought on, everything he have lived. I saw everything in that second. I understood every single thing, but there was something that upset me."
"Did that happen before? Wait— forget it. What did you saw?"
"I'll detail it to you," I sighed and shivered, "First, I saw Edward giving to Bella the compromise ring – I should say it wasn't the face an engaged girl should have – but then I saw Edward driving in a place where was snowing. He parked and then met with Tanya Denali. Then, he kissed her and…" I looked down again. I started sobbing silently because of the horror and the sadness I felt.
"Ness, your dad…? How could he…?
"I… I don't know." My voice broke in every word I pronounced. It seemed like Jacob had notice I was crying. "I thought Edward was different, that he would never trick Bella—" I sobbed louder.
"Don't cry, love." He cleared a tear that was sliding through my cheek. "I swear you I'll smash his skull…" He said. Hate was testable in his voice.
"No, Jake, please. Whatever he have done, he still been my father. Besides, if I told you about this, is because I know I can trust you and I don't want you to lose that trust, so don't tell this to anybody.
"Okay, but, how didn't Edward had read your mind? Why doesn't he know you know what you aren't supposed to know?" He asked. I laughed because of his tricky question but then my smile vanished.
"Well, that's why my Uncle Emmett knows about it. I told it to him so he can block Edward's gift with his. There's no way he can know that I know what I am not supposed to know." I told him repeating his weird sentence.
"Emmett is gifted?"
"Yes, they discovered it a little while ago. After… that – what happened with Bella and you." I shake my head trying to throw out that though and shivering again. "His gift is to block every of the other's. He can turn them upside down too, like what happened with Edward. He can avoid Bella's shield, Alice's visions, Jasper's emotional control; he can make people read Edward's mind instead of Edward read others'. It's as if he have every gift that vampires around him have, he can use them as if their gifts are his –read minds, control emotions, shield himself.
"It's something really weird because, firstly, that gift hasn't been seen before him and either because Emmet had never have a gift since Carlisle change him. You can say he have every existing gift, control them." I smiled while a crazy thought reach my mind. "For example, I could read your mind only touching you if I ask Emmett to use his gift."
"Believe me, my head is not a nice place to look in." he said and then continued asking. "So Emmett helped you with all this and knows it. Don't you think he would tell it to the beauty queen?" I laughed about the way he called Rosalie. I loved when he used nicknames, but sometimes they were offensive.
"I don't believe it. Emmett is pretty trustable. And about your head, I would really like to see inside of it. If I ask it to Emmett, would you let me see?"
"I doubt it. It is pretty disgusting to have an entire werewolves' pack, a sentiment-controller and a tempered vampire like to have another person inside."
"Okay, I won't push you to show me, but I really would like to see.
"Nessie, stop asking it, please; If you convince me about this – what won't be any difficult for you – I will regret."
"Why would you regret?"
"There are thing in my head that nobody should see. My life was a really hell during a time, Ness. I wouldn't like anybody to live that through me, and much less if it's you." The pain faint in his voice and made me sad. What would he have live that make him suffer that much?
"Okay. I'll take this not as a painful refuse, but as a shield to my sanity." I smiled at him. He grinned back with that smile I loved so much and, of course, my smile widen.
"It's easy to be with you." His smile vanished; he looked me in the eyes, took my head between his big and string hands, and then whispered. "I love you, Renesmee"
"I do so."I took his head with one hand and caress his hair.
He got closer to me with eyes closed. I closed mines too – after twinkling compulsively – and I focus myself on feeling. His lips grazed mines delicate and gently but with some despair.
He kissed me even after he promised not to do it – against my will.
It wasn't as any other kiss I've felt or imagined. He kissed me with a passion he have never done before. I've never even imagined what I was feeling in that moment. His thick and desirable lips moved wildly — but gently at the time – provoked me the same feeling I've felt in the clearing.
I wanted him. So much. The desire I felt for him was almost uncontainable, the wish of him being mine.
I knew it wasn't my time yet, I was too young. But I knew that I was five or six years more mature than I should be, so according to my maturity, it was time to start a family, aide from Bella's. It was time of being Jacob's and he being mine.
It was something magic. I was sure that no vampire or human could feel with the intensity I felt, because I did it with the delicacy if a human but with the passion of a vampire.
His lips started moving faster and faster, until I couldn't breath anymore – supposedly I didn't need air being a vampire but as I was half-human I needed it more than vampires although less than humans— so I broke the kiss to take air. The kiss finished there so I regret.
When I opened my eyes his were still closed. I caress his cheek taking off my hand from it. He released my head and dropped his hands.
I saw him fascinated. It was something just… indescribable. He attracted me in a way I couldn't understand. He was my life, there's no doubt.
He opened his eyes slowly; I turned my sight aside and shuddered. I took my head again, and tried to retain my sight. I flushed and looked down after meeting his eyes.
"Nessie." He whispered.
"Yes?" I answered starring down.
"Look at me." He commanded with gentle voice. I looked up slowly.
When our eyes met, I felt my world turning around him.
"I'm sorry." He apologized. Why in the world should he been apologizing?
"What?" I asked. Disgust was testable in my voice.
"I shouldn't have done it. Than was wrong but I couldn't help it, I'm sorry. I swear it to you.
"Why shouldn't you? What's wrong with this? I never asked you to swear it." I argued after sighing.
"Your father is going to snatch away my head." He said without paying me attention, talking to himself.
"Why? He should mind on his own business."
"Nessie, you're fourteen, I'm thirty-one. I'm the double of your age, it is not okay I pretend you, less I kiss you. I should wait more, I have to be patient.
"Jacob, there are ninety years between my parents' ages. Edward is one-hundred-twenty-one years old and Bella is just thirty two. I don't see any problem and I'm sure they have to understand. Besides, maybe you can be patient, but I can't, Jacob, my life won't be that long." I told him with broken desperate voice.
"We don't know that yet, Renesmee. Maybe you're immortal too, like us."
"But maybe not. Maybe this is my last year and you know this better than I do. Carlisle has told you everything, and you have to be conscious that there are so many possibilities that I don't make it through my eighteens." My voice broke again.
"That's what I fear the most in this world. I'm afraid of loosing you, Nessie. That's another reason why I don't want you to loose with me what can be your last years. I don't deserve you, I hurt you so much.
"Jacob, I can't be with anybody that isn't you."
"I assure you I can make my life aside for you, Nessie, at least I will try. Remember the imprint doesn't need to be corresponded, you can chose.
"But it is corresponded" I interrupted him angry. "Jacob, my feeling for you doesn't have anything to do with magic, it is not caused by imprint, and I've already told you it. I mean, obviously it is firstly thanks to that because maybe if you weren't imprinted with me I'll have never meet you. If I love you is for the way you deal with me, your smile, your eyes, your moth, your personality… I just love everything, every single thing about you.
"My feelings for you are much more stringer than that, aside form the wolfy-things." He smiled. "You know, it's a way to call it." I smiled too but then sighed.
"I think it be better to go down now, before Edward come up to see what's up after hearing my deafening heart." I said narrowing my eyes.
"I guess you're right." I rose up from the bed and he did so after me. He took my hand and we went downstairs.
2. RESPONSibilities
"How're things going? Is everything fine?" Bella asked.
"Yes, everything is great again." Jake answered.
"Thank you, mom" I told her. "If it wasn't for you, maybe would have never speak to Jacob again."
"You called me… mom." She said with red eyes.
"Of course I did. That's what you are, my mom." I saw Jacob surprised.
"You never call me mom." She said taking Edward's hand. "You always call me Bella. I'm sorry but it is a great emotion"
"Yes, well" I said narrowing my eyes and smiling ashamed. "I don't think I'm going to call like that, I just can get used! It doesn't help me to call you parents that Edward and look just four years older than me.
"It is okay, Nessie, don't worry. Well, however I need to go and see Rebicce.
"Of course." I said.
"Bella—" Jacob called her hesitant.
"Yes?" she turned around to face us again.
"I know I'm not good at being father but I don't think it is fair that you take care of a daughter that is mine too. I would like to see her if you don't mind, I really miss her." She continued.
His comment hurt me a little but I'm sure it didn't hurt more than Edward's comment to Jacob. "Reb is my daughter whether you like it or not. Bella and I are the only responsible of her."
"She's my daughter and you can't prohibit me to see her or be with her. You have no claim to her."
"I have it because her mother is my wife." He argued.
"Yes, but she is my daughter and her mom is my—" he narrowed his eyes and sighed.
Lover, I thought, but probably that was a wrong way to use the word, because she wasn't his lover for one night they have been together, because it had only be one night, hasn't it?
"Yes, it's bad way to use the word." I was afraid he have listen my thoughts, but he was glaring at Jacob. He must have thought on the same word.
But Bella's comment surprised me more. "You know? It's a bit uncomfortable that my husband and my…lover are sharing thoughts while I'm standing in front without knowing what's going on."
"Lover?" Edward asked surprised, though.
"Yeah, I think it's a way to call him—"
"You see?" Jacob told him.
"I got lost" Bella said. We just starred at her. "Whatever. I'm going with Rebicce. Try to not kill each other." Edward rolled his eyes when Bella glare him.
I tried to control myself while we were in Edward's presence but it was almost impossible to stop those moments, those feelings… somehow I did it, but it seemed like Jacob wasn't up to do it.
"We have already warned you which one where the limits of your physical contact between Renesmee and you, you mongrel." Edward told him. No, he didn't just speak, he growled at him.
"What?" he asked distracted.
"We command you strictly not to have any physical contact and you didn't obey. We let without punish that mistake once, but I wont make that again." His command-tone made me angry and Jacob too.
"Who do you think you are? My father? Either he can't tell me what to do, bloodsucker."
"Maybe I can give you orders Jacob, but I can give them to Renesmee and I can prohibit her to date with you I can even prohibit her to see you."
"Edward!" That's not fair! You can't do it!" I pleaded him furiously.
"Of course I can, and I'm going to do it. You can not see or talk to this mongrel, Renesmee, did you her me?
"You know? Maybe you can prohibit or command me whatever you want but you have no guarantee that I'm going to obey you, there's no way you can stop me."
"Of course I can Renesmee Cullen—"
"What's going on, Edward?" Bella appeared — Rebicce in her arms— as a personal miracle.
"Bella, Edward wants to punish me—" I shouted desperately.
"Edward, what caused the punishment?" She asked interrupting me with forehead and eyebrows wrinkled.
"We have already warned them about physical contact between they both, about not to be close to Renesmee with those intentions and —"
"And?" She said raising one eyebrow.
"They did it again. I won't allow it. Jacob can't even step in this house, no telephone calls from La Push or any place related with dogs. Nobody will even talk about him in this family.
"Edward, you can't do that! You can't make me —!" she screamed him but then stopped abruptly. "You can't make Nessie suffer this way." She said lower.
"Is all this really about Nessie, Isabella? Won't it be that you can't live without seeing him? Wouldn't it be that you can't stop wanting him to be near to you?" Edward screamed her, something he had never done before. Rebicce start crying too noisily. "Wouldn't you want to do the same thing you did a while a go? Will you mind to have another baby, Jacob? I doubt it."
His comment provoked me a few shudders, one behind the other. Bella was paralyzed, her mouth open — like Jacob's and mine — and red eyes. I looked down, so they couldn't notice my tears.
Jacob reacted to my tears and Edward's words and dropped himself over him.
"Damned leech—" Jacob screamed.
"Don't touch me, puppy."
Jacob started trembling and hitting Edward, and unexpectedly, he fall and crashed in the floor. He caressed his chin in a pain gesture. The next I saw was Jacob crashing against the wall. He fell after a crack and he left a trail of blood.
"Jacob!" I screamed and run to met him, but Edward stopped me and when I turned to face him he was not there, he was over Jacob.
"Edward, stop it!" Bella screamed.
Edward raised form the floor and faced us. His lips were covered in blood. Jacob was convulsing without manage in the floor.
"No!" Bella and I screamed and the same time.
"Edward, what did you do?" Bella accused him.
"You're a monster!" I shouted to him without pity and I run toward Jacob again, who was eyes closed and howling in pain.
"Nessie—" Edward started but I didn't allow him to talk.
"How could you do it? Do you know what you have done? What the hell is going on with you?!"
"Listen to me, Jake."-Bella told him. "Do you trust me?"
"Of course I do." He said almost unintelligibility.
"Okay." She murmured to herself. She took Jacob's arm and fitted her fangs in the same place Edward had. She started sucking the morphine in his blood. She raised form the floor and walked toward the bathroom. Jacob's blood smelled clean.
"Are you all right, love?"
"Yes, but it hurts pretty much."
"Jacob, I'm sorry I couldn't help it." Edward started, and I sent him a furious glance him.
"Yeah, sure." He said rolling his eyes.
"I can believe you did that, Edward!" I protested him.
"Ness…" He started.
"Don't be angry with him, honey."
"Wow, the venom really affected your head." I answered without thinking. He laughed.
"I've decided I won't make anything against him. Better than that, I'm going to ignore him completely." I grant it him.
~ 12 ~