Official disclaimer : This is a work of fanfiction using characters from Harry Potter world which is trademarked by J K Rowling who has created such a wonderful world without which my story would not exist. The characters are created and owned by J K Rowling and I do not claim any ownership over them or Harry Potter world except for the OCs and the changes made by me in story . This story is an invention of mine, is for entertainment purposes only and is not a part of official story. I do not profit financially from creation and publication of this story. Enjoy !
Thousands and thousands of candles were floating in mid-air in great hall which had been decorated with garlands of mistletoe and ivy. Ceiling showed a clear black sky peppered with hundreds of stars twinkling. The air was alive with chatter of numerous voices occasionally interrupted by a toast or cheers. Witches and wizards from all over the country came together to celebrate their victory. The atmosphere conveyed such happiness, elation and jubilation that one can't help but join in.
The grounds however were bathed in silence, darkness and mists. The silence was shattered as front doors of castle opened to reveal a shadow moving over brightly lit grass before the doors swung shut and the grounds became sea of darkness once more. The lone hooded figure crossed the grounds and disappeared in the forest.
Moonlight and mists swirled around as the figure entered a clearing and lifted their wand to illuminate the area. The wand light showed a hollow surrounded by massive trees with leaf strewn ground below, the starry sky above and a lone figure of a girl with black hair who was sitting by a tree holding her wand in front of the intruder. Nothing moved in the sudden brightness as both figures stared at each other wands trained at one another. Silence dragged on as they took each other in the wand light, then the one standing crossed the clearing with quick steps to kneel in front of other and lowered the hood to reveal another girl with brown curls.
'Emma' spoke the girl in a soft whisper. When the other girl didn't respond she raised her hand to cup the girls cheek making the girl to look her in eye, forcing her to respond with a whisper of ' Hermione'
'Emma, why were you not at the feast? Everybody had been waiting for you. Kingsley wanted to discuss something important and molly was so worried she thought you had been kidnapped by death eaters! and I've been trying to placate them for hours telling them you will show up. And what exactly are you doing here again! Its nearly midnight! This forest is still not safe! What if something attacked you!'
'Breath Hermione' replied emma a sigh escaping her lips as she shifted away from her friend 'I just needed some peace' and after a moments pause she added 'and people can handle their matters without help of "girl-who- lived" for once. I did what I had been chosen to do, didn't I ? Now just tell them to leave me alone for a year or maybe ten'.
'Peace ?, you came to forbidden forest in middle of night for "peace"? Why do you do this Emma? Why are you running away from us? Running away from everything?" Hermione said her voice full of concern. She added carefully after a minute of silence searching her friends face 'its because of him, isn't it? Because of Neville? 'Pain flittered across Emma's face, her vivid green eyes suddenly bright, then she closed them taking few deep breaths to calm herself turning her face away from Hermione .
'Oh Emma, I'm sorry. Sorry' her own voice shaking 'I'm so sorry. I didn't want to bring it up. But you shouldn't blame yourself for it, nobody blames you for it. Its all because of Voldemort and death eaters. What happened was never your fault.'
' No, it wasn't my fault but still I was the reason it happened. Its always me Hermione. First my parents then Sirius and dumbledore and …..' a sob escaped her lips at the end, painful memories resurfacing that she tried to forcibly suppress.
Hermione threw her arms around her friend and spoke after a few minutes of silence in a tentative voice ' I know its difficult Emma, its so difficult to get past all that happened over years and all we have lost … all the people that are gone... difficult but its not impossible, you need to get past it and move on. Please, Emma come with me back to castle. Nothing comes from wallowing in past regrets. Come on lets go back'. She stood dragging Emma with her and turned to move when Emma wretched her hand from her grip.
' Move on ?' Emma spat her leash on her emotions slipping from her 'move on, so easy for you to say Hermione, what with your parents being still alive and george with you every step of the way ! Move on! As if nothing happened! how do you move on when everyone you ever loved is dead! When I myself was dead! Dead Hermione …. I was dead. Voldemort killed me in this very place! I was supposed to die when I was just a toddler! And every time I escape it somebody else has to die in my place somebody else has to pay the price …my parents, Sirius, dumbledore …and… and … Neville and I don't know how many more will pay for my life .. for all I know it could be you next or Ginny …' or a moment or two only the sound of Emma's rugged breathing could be heard in the clearing .
'No , Emma, no its not like that, how can you think like that! Listen lets just return to…' Hermione said recovering from the shock of the revelations, as she advanced towards her friend when Emma interrupted her.
'Just go Hermione, go!' Emma said regretting ever getting into this conversation. I'll see you tomorrow'. When Hermione made no intention of moving she shrieked 'For the sake of our friendship hermione, I'm begging you, just leave for now !'
Looking hurt and crestfallen Hermione turned towards castle but with her jaw set in a manner which told Emma that this conversation will be continued later. Releasing a long sigh Emma left the clearing and searched for her cloak in her Mokeskin pouch when her hand came in contact with a smooth cold surface … the stone, she retrieved it along with the cloak and the wand
…Deathly hallows...
…..Master of death …..
She broke into hysterical laughter at the thought as she collapsed to the ground. She clenched her hands around the elder wand, stone and cloak lying innocently in her lap … ah the price she had paid to be …the master of death… She didn't want this ! She didn't want to be Girl-who-lived ! She didn't want to be the chosen one ! the vanquisher of Voldemort! Or the master of death ! Or whatever ridiculous title she was being given now by papers. Not this hollow glory and fame ...
No … no … she didn't want to live with this guilt… this guilt that was eating her up from inside … like a wound bleeding inside of her, she tried to bury it all inside trying to staunch the flow, but for every time it stopped the next time it bled even more then before … she didn't want any thing but just for this guilt and pain to go away…
She'll do anything …anything for a life in which she could stop these deaths for her.. because of her …for a world where there will be less suffering less pain and destruction … if she could see her family and friends alive and happy and whole …even if she was not a part of it ...even if she had to watch from a distance ... and if Voldemort came after her again to kill her, she'll happily accept her death if her loved ones could live …she would do anything for it… anything … any price she will pay for it to be given a chance again. She cried her heart out in the solitude of forest, clenching her fists burying her face in her cloak, she cried until she slipped into unconsciousness, not noticing as she was enveloped in a bright light and disappeared from the forest along with the hollows.
A/N : This is a story of fem Harry - Emma Potter . She has defeated Voldemort but lost a lot of people who were very close to her and she feels responsible about it . Her past will become more clear as story progresses. If you have any questions please feel free to ask. And it would be mighty helpful if someone's interested in being my beta reader makes the whole thing much faster