Wish Fulfillment
Summary: A girl falls into Middle-earth. Who sent her there? What will happen to her?
Disclaimer: Ëa and all that is contained therein are the property of the great Tolkien, but, alas, Tiffany is mine alone.
***
Tiffany sighed dreamily as she stared at the large photo of Orlando Bloom that adorned her computer's desktop. There was nothing in the world she would like more than to find her way into Middle-earth, join the Fellowship, and fall in love with a certain Elf…
And she was really going to get her wish, if that website was for real. Imagine, she could be Delwen Moonflower Silvereyes, Princess of the Forest of Dreams, and Legolas Greenleaf's one true love… All she had to do was click on the link, and she would be magically transported to the world of Tolkien, courtesy of "M. Bauglir," whoever that was. Probably one of those characters who were just in the books, which she had tried to read but didn't like. Not nearly enough of Legolas in them. It was as though Tolkien thought that dumb midget Frodo was the most important character or something.
Of course, part of her knew that the website couldn't really work, but that part was quickly suborned by the half of her that was drooling over the Prince of Mirkwood. She checked the contents of her duffel bag one last time: shampoo and conditioner, makeup, hair dryer, collection of Orli photos, and that pretty piece of calligraphy her friend had made for her… She had briefly considered bringing a weapon, but of course her Legsy would protect her on the quest. It only took the Fellowship a few days to get to that Rohan place, anyways.
Her hand trembling, she prepared to click on the link. Please, let it be real…
***
In Hollin, more than two weeks after leaving Rivendell, the Fellowship of the Ring was nearing Caradhras. As they walked, a cry from Legolas drew their attention to a faint black speck high in the sky.
"Not more of those birds, Strider?" asked Sam worriedly, as the speck grew rapidly larger.
"I think not," replied Aragorn, "for there is but one, and it seems to be falling."
The Fellowship watched in silence for a moment, until Legolas' elven sight was at last able to discern more of the falling object. "How strange. It seems to be…pink," he murmured, sounding increasingly confused. "And I think – nay, I am certain that it is a woman, or at least the semblance of one."
As the seconds ticked by, the figure grew increasingly large, until all were certain it was indeed a woman, and that she seemed to be screaming. As she drew closer to the ground, Boromir sprang forward suddenly and pulled Pippin back towards a tree. A moment later the girl hit the ground where the hobbit had been standing with a sickening thud. There was a long silence as the companions surveyed the grisly results of a person being dropped from a very great height.
"Poor thing," said Frodo finally. "I wonder what befell her."
"Nothing I want to think about," said Merry. "You're lucky Boromir saved your skin, Pip." The younger hobbit only stared at the remains, wide-eyed.
"It's unnatural, that's for certain," said Sam, shaking his head. "Best not to go prying into such matters."
"Some contrivance of the Enemy's, perhaps, though I know not what she could have been meant to do," muttered Gimli, peering at what was left of the girl's body. She seemed to have been holding something in her hand.
"I can think of no other way she could have come from the sky," said Aragorn pensively. "But perhaps it was only her death that was intended, and our presence is irrelevant."
"Let us be on our way and ponder no longer," said Gandalf. "I do not doubt that her death was indeed the result of some evil sorcery, and such a strange event could be the harbinger of others of more harm to us and our Quest."
Moving in haste now, the Nine Companions and their pony were soon once more on their way towards the Redhorn Gate. But as they left the place where the girl had struck the ground, Legolas bent over and picked up a rather bloody square of paper from the ground. After one glance, however, he dropped it as if it had burned him. A contrivance of the Enemy's, indeed. For the paper had read, in elegant tengwar letters and his own Sindarin tongue, "Delwen, wife of Legolas." What horrible fate was being planned for him?
The elf fled after the remainder of the Fellowship, leaving behind what little remained of Tiffany Delwen Moonflower Silvereyes, Princess of the Forest of Dreams, and the One True Love of Legolas Greenleaf.
***
Beyond the Walls of the World, somewhere in the timeless nothingness that is the Void, a dark figure laughed and checked off a name on a long list held in its blackened hands. This new way of passing time had proved delightful indeed. Now, what to do with "Elanavantarien, Lady of Fire?" Perhaps a meeting with Gothmog the Balrog was in order…
A/N: Just my little rant on how ridiculous the idea of a modern-day girl "falling into Middle-earth" can be. Kudos to those of you who know why "Delwen" is such a horribly funny name…