Disclaimer: I do not own Moonlight, but I'm glad they let me play with their characters.

This was conceived and written before the last two episodes were aired. I have Matchbox 20 on the brain since I'll be seeing them in Feb. That also had me thinking Valentine's Day. So I'm going with that. Please let me know if I'm getting any better at this.

I so love how the actual writers of this show get the emotions so right.

Heartache

It's alright, why don't you tell me my friend, you'll still be there when the heartache ends.

When the Heartache Ends—Rob Thomas

Chapter 1

Beth sat staring at her computer screen. The Buzzwire news room was quieter than usual. She glanced at the clock and realized it was 11:30 PM. She had a hard time keeping track of time these days. The story in front of her held no interest to her, but she needed to finish it. Beth snuck a look at Mo's door to see what her boss was up to. Maureen was absorbed with her computer screen. Mo had been easy on her lately. Everyone had been so careful around her. She could feel people watching when they thought she wouldn't notice.

"Josh is dead." The thought clanged in her head. She felt empty and cold. Tears threatened to spill out once more. There were days when all she felt like doing was crying.

"Get a grip Turner," Beth muttered. "Just finish this and get yourself home. You can fall apart then." She took a deep breath and returned to her task. Ten minutes later she'd put the finishing touches on the bank robbery story she had covered. Cleaning up her space she grabbed her coat and purse and headed out.

"It's done Maureen" she said as she passed her door.

"Okay Beth. Are you all right?" Mo came to the door and looked at Beth in concern.

Beth nodded.

"I'll be fine," she said bleakly and headed out of the office. Walking to the parking area, Beth found her mind rerunning the last several weeks. She had been spending a lot of time trapped in this constant replay of thoughts.

Josh had been killed. The case had gone so terribly wrong. Mick had refused to turn him to save his life. She had begged and he wouldn't do it. Couldn't do it, if she was going to be fair. She knew she had asked a lot of him. She understood Mick's reluctance. She understood now, but not then. But if only….. If only didn't bring Josh back.

Tears leaked past her defenses again. She felt so guilty. Running to New York with Mick had been selfish. Her conflicted feelings for the two men tore at her. She had hurt Josh and felt awful about that. What had she been thinking? She had wanted what both men offered. She loved how Josh took care of her, his strong stable influence in her life. And with Mick there was the danger, the excitement and the just below the surface passion.

She lost both of them so quickly. Josh was gone forever and Beth had barely held it together through the funeral. Her anger at Mick had driven him away. She knew he had felt guilty for not being able to do what Beth had asked of him. She had been cruel the last time they spoke. She didn't even know how to begin repairing the damage. Josef had come to Josh's funeral. That had surprised Beth. He had offered his condolences, but had not said anything about Mick.

With tears running down her cheeks, she dug through her bag searching for her keys. When she found them, she looked up sniffing back this latest round of tears. There was someone standing alongside her car. Even though he was in the shadows, Beth recognized him instantly. Her heart did a little lurch and then thudded painfully.

"Beth?" his low voice made it a question.

"Hey Mick," she answered with a hitch in her voice.

"Beth, I'm so sorry," Mick said moving a couple of steps towards her. She froze, not able to move ahead or retreat. Mick saw her hesitate and stopped where he was. "I….uh….I meant to come sooner, I just wasn't sure you wanted to see me."

"It's okay Mick," Beth said finding her voice. "I wasn't sure what I wanted either." She felt her head swimming. There he stood his eyes so sad and regret written all over his face. Beth knew how he took so much responsibility on his shoulders.

"Are you all right?" he asked.

Beth tried to stifle a sob and threw her head back, blinking tears away. She looked at him through wet lashes and gave him a half-hearted smile.

"I wish I had a dollar for every person who has asked me that," she choked. "I'd be rich. No Mick, I'm not all right. I may never be all right again."

Mick was in front of her in a rush. He stopped, unsure if he dared to touch her. She looked so fragile.

"I'm sorry," he breathed softly. "I wish……"

"I wish too," she sobbed and collapsed.

Mick caught her in his arms and held her tight. A storm of tears poured out of Beth. She grabbed a hold of his coat front and buried her head in his chest. Mick gently stroked her hair with one hand while holding her tight with the other. He murmured wordless comfort sounds and kissed the top of her head.

"Ssh, Beth. You'll be okay," he promised as the torrent of tear started to subside. "It will be okay."

Beth hiccupped and swallowed the last of her tears. She felt calmer and empty. She rested her forehead against his chest, feeling his calm breathing. She couldn't open her fingers to release her grip on his coat. If he didn't have her in his strong embrace she knew her legs wouldn't hold her.

"You'd think I wouldn't have any more tears left in me," she said at last. "I should be dried out by now."

"You are entitled. Beth, no one should have had to face what you have these last weeks. I wish I could make it different. I wish I could have done what you asked of me."

Beth looked up at him with pain in her eyes.

"I let Josh down," she said. "I wasn't there for him lately. I hurt him."

"Because of me," Mick said roughly. "Because I drew you into my world."

Beth stood straighter and released her grip on his coat. She laid her hands flat on his chest.

"I went willingly into your world," she corrected. "Mick, I made my own choices. And doing so, I hurt Josh. Maybe I would have eventually. I asked you to do something I had no right to ask. I'm sorry."

"We're a sorry pair," Mick said with a slight smile.

Beth smiled back weakly. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too," Mick said taking her face gently in his hands. "I was afraid you would shut me out forever."

"Forever is a long time," Beth answered.

Mick stared into her eyes. She looked better now. He should go, but he couldn't let go of her. He had always kept coming back. Josef had stopped by after the funeral and chewed him out. He never thought Josef Konstantin would push him towards a human, but the world was changing.

"Would you like to go somewhere?" he asked. "Or do you have to go home?"

"I'm tired Mick."

"Sure, I just thought….."

"Thought what?" Beth asked.

"Thought you might not want to go home, to be alone."

Beth looked away. She hated the word alone. She wasn't her own best company these days.

"I don't want to go home Mick. Take me to your place, please." The words were out of her mouth before she thought about what she had said.

Mick looked at her with a little frown on his face. "Are you sure?" he asked.

"I'm so sick of my own company. Please, Mick, I need a friend right now."

"You've got one" he said. "Let's take my car."

Mick steered her to his car, opening the door for her. She slid in and smiled weakly at him as he got in the driver's side. She closed her eyes as the night air blew over her. It was unusually warm for the time of year. Uncomfortable with the silence Mick switched on the radio.

"It's never easy and you never know. What leaves you crying and what makes you whole." Rob Thomas' voice sang sadly. Mick clicked it off quickly.

"Sorry," he said. "Even the radio is sad tonight."

"I like the song though," Beth said.

She didn't say anything else as they drove to Mick's place. Mick keyed the door open and ushered her in. He activated the crystal fireplace, liking the comforting glow it added to the room. Beth took off her coat and sat down on the couch.

"Would you like something to drink?" Mick asked.

"No……uh yes," Beth said with a shake of her head.

Mick poured her a scotch and took it over to her. He took a seat in the chair near her. Beth took a sip and wrinkled her nose as she swallowed.

"Want something else?"

"No. This is perfect," she said and took a bigger swallow. She looked at him and smiled. The spreading warmth from the alcohol felt good. Beth looked closer at Mick. He looked uncomfortable and she didn't think it had anything to do with her.

"Mick, are you okay?"

"Yea. I'm going to be."

She nodded, not wanting to rehash the last few weeks. It was comforting to sit in Mick's apartment with him close by. She felt some balance in herself being restored. She took another sip of her drink. It didn't take much to realize that it could go to her head in a hurry on her empty stomach.

"What were you doing at Buzzwire tonight?" she asked.

"I have something for you," Mick said reaching into his pocket. "I wanted to make sure you got it today."

"Today?" Beth questioned. "What's so important about today?"

Mick came and sat next to her on the couch. He took her hand and held it out palm up.

"Look at the clock. It's after midnight. Today is February 14th."

Beth's eyes went wide.

"Valentine's Day?" she said.

Mick nodded and let a gold chain trickle down into her hand. An oval disk with an angel stamped on it lay on top of the chain.

"Here's a real guardian angel," Mick said with a sheepish grin. "I bought it in New York."

Beth closed her hand over the necklace and shut her eyes. She didn't want to cry again. It was perfect.

"Beth?"

"Oh, Mick, thank you," she said smiling up at him. She opened her hand and looked at it closer. "It's beautiful." He leaned in and took it out of her hand.

"Try it on," he said and undid the clasp. She lifted her hair and he fastened it. Mick didn't take his hands from her neck. He stroked his fingers over her skin lightly.

Their faces were close; Beth could feel his breath on her face. She found herself looking at his mouth. Her thoughts blurred a little. Mick had never initiated anything; she didn't know how to understand this. She looked up into his eyes.

Mick leaned in and kissed her. His kiss was light, lips gently pressing to hers. But he didn't break it off, just delivered a series of light kisses as if he were afraid to unleash anything more urgent.

Mick pulled back, studying her expression. He looked as if he expected rejection. Beth melted. He looked as if bracing for a slap and Beth reached up to lightly stroke his cheek.

"Mick don't look so sad," she said, her voice full of emotion. "It's okay."

"I'm afraid, Beth," Mick confessed.

"Of what, Mick? I can't see you afraid of anything." Beth said puzzled.

"I'm afraid of how I feel about you. I'm afraid of what I've done to your life," he said and looked down. He couldn't meet her gaze.

Beth lifted his chin, forcing him to look at her.

"What do you feel? Do not keep me in the dark. Mick, how can I decide where to go in my life if you don't ever tell me the truth?"

"I love you Beth. So much that I can't imagine being without you. But I don't have that right."

"Stop that!" Beth ordered gently. She placed both hands alongside his face, forcing him to keep looking at her. "Don't play the martyr, it's not right. How many times do I have to tell you, you are not a monster?"

"I've learned that I can't change what I am," he whispered.

"Who's asking?" Beth pointed out. "I don't ever recall saying that I like you, but I wish you weren't a vampire. Have I ever asked you to be different?"

"No."

"Mick, we have issues. But let's not throw things into that pot that have no part in the discussion," she said sternly. "We've danced around this so long that it's the reason I hurt Josh. I hurt Josh, not you. I'll have to live with that for the rest of my life. Don't make me hurt you any more than I've already have. I know I said some terrible things." She leaned up and kissed him softly.

Mick pulled her into a hug and held her head against him. He stroked her soft hair. At this point he would have been content to sit there forever. Just holding her, hearing her heartbeat put his heart at rest.

"Happy Valentine's Day, my love," he whispered.

"Oh Mick, I wish I knew exactly how I feel. At this moment I'm too messed up to answer you. Please be patient with me. Mick, please understand," Beth begged and hugged him tightly. She had to make him understand that now was not the time for promises. She had so much to sort out before she could tell him what was in her heart. She had to forgive herself before she could give him any hope.

"I can wait. I have time," she heard him say softly, his voice full of emotion.

He leaned back and held her close. Beth snuggled in his arms, resting her head on his chest. It felt so good to be held. It was good to let go of all her inner conflicts finally. She had been so tightly wound up since Josh had died.

Mick felt her relax and knew when she fell asleep. He sat there, content to hold her. He had spoken the words that he had buried so long. He understood why she hadn't been able to say them back. Not right now. But he could wait.

End chapter.

Please review. I have some more but I am not sure if it should go beyond a one shot. I'm posting this after seeing Love Lasts Forever but before the final episode. I need to know if anyone is enjoying this. Please help.