Author's note: This is my first story to write, but I hope you like it! I've always loved the friendship of Caleb and Spencer, so that's pretty much where the idea of this one-shot came from! Don't get me wrong, I love Spoby and Haleb sooooooo much-even if this story doesn't have that. But here we go! Have fun and enjoy! :)
P.S. If you have anymore ideas of one-shots I could possibly write (any ship), I will try my best to make that happen! :)
(Spencer's POV)
"What?!" I demanded. I needed answers—this just can't be true. It can't. My glossy eyes locked with his bright, blue eyes—the ones that used to make me feel happy, but now they just seemed hollow. Lifeless. No mercy or emotion.
He didn't even show any feelings, when he said the words that I would've never expected to escape his mouth. I loved him—or at least I thought I did. My heart was pounding, and I couldn't focus on anything. Why did I believe he ever loved me? How could I let him in and control my heart?
I'm so stupid for not realizing this sooner. The way he looked at her, while she was with us. The way they both laughed with each other. I was blinded by my false feelings to even notice the connection they shared. I was naïve. My innocence is my weakness. I hoped that he and I would make it. I thought I knew him better. I thought….
He looked deep into my eyes, making my spine shiver. I didn't recognize the man I once loved, even if he was right in front of me. I couldn't recognize him. I wanted to forget anything I've ever experienced or even felt for him. Our feelings for each other were never real. It was just a figment of my imagination that I somehow managed to make a reality. I've known it all along, but denying myself became a habit I got used to. At times, I even forgot I was still convincing myself.
"Spe-Spencer….you don't understand. I have tried to tell you. I didn't want to see you get hurt…especially like this," He muttered calmly, "I never wanted to hurt you. I love you, but I was never in love with you. I just couldn't be. I just can't love you the way I love her. I am sorry."
I glared at him wide-eyed with shock. "You're sorry?! No. No, you know what? I am sorry. I am. Me. I am so sorry for falling in love you. So sorry that I was blind to see who you really loved. I am sorry that I ever thought we could be something. And most of all, I am sorry for not being the girl of your dreams. For not being the one that you could easily love, without yourself forcing anything. You know what? Go ahead and break my heart. I don't care. Go ahead and just go laugh, cry, kiss, and love her—as I watch in pain. Rub it in my face—just rip my heart out as I watch you and her become something better than what I thought we were. You made me believe that you were in love with me. I thought we had something special. Something worth the pain, risk, and heartbreak. But in reality, we had nothing." I hadn't even realized that I was screaming in his face. Tears streamed down my face. I felt as it trickled down my jaw, and onto the cold floor. I looked up at him with hurt in my eyes. Why does this hurt so much?
"Spencer. Listen to me," he said firmly, as his empty eyes bored into mine, "I don't want to see you like this. I don't want you to cry and scream at me—trying to make me feel guilty for my feelings. I am not-and never will be-guilty for what I feel for…her." The way he said 'her' allowed my whole body to shiver with fright, as sobs threatened to escape my mouth.
I felt scared, but not because of him—because of me. I am scared that one day, I am going to believe that I'm in love with someone, and then they're just going to get up and leave like that. And I'll have to deal with this pain—over and over because I'm dumb enough to fall in love.
"NO! You listen to me," I raised my voice in an unsettling tone, "I cried over you, laughed with you, and planned our future. And now you're getting up and leaving me locked inside of my naïve mind. I never knew I could be capable of hate, but now….now I know what hate feels like. We used to have love-well…at least in my mind-but now, all I can feel is hate in this atmosphere. Hate for you, hate for her, and mostly…hate for myself. I hate that I was stupid enough to fall for your tricks. I am done. I will not cry over this again. I will never beat myself over a dumb heartbreak…especially this one. I want to say that we are over, but…we were over a long, long time ago, when I realized you were in love with someone else."
Pools and gallons of tears poured out of my eyes. My heart felt as if Love itself was ripping it out of my own chest. I gritted my teeth, and for a second I thought my jaw was going to crack.
I was about to walk away, but then I stopped dead in my tracks. I whipped my body around, and bore my eyes into his soul.
My hand took control and balled in a fist, as I threw it towards his face. It came into contact with his stiff skin and hard jaw. The punch was fierce and contained anger, frustration and regret. He whipped his head back around and a huge, red bruise was forming on the right side of his face.
I turned around, barged through his front door, and ran as fast as my feet could take me. Cold air stabbed at my sensitive skin.
I didn't care where I was going, as long as I was away from him. Away from….Toby.
My vision was blurred from the meaningless tears that overwhelmed my eyes. I couldn't believe they loved each other. The girl who helped me through the times I have cried over Toby, the girl who I loved so much, the girl who I thought was my best friend.
Toby's words still rang in my ears, "I am in love with Hanna".
As I was just about to dash across the street, a car sped up, and then came to a screeching stop. The headlights shined in my face, and my eyes started to burn. A figure came out of the car and started walking towards me. My legs felt weak, and I fell down with a painful thud. I stared at the stars, which now seemed uninteresting to me.
"Hey! Are you okay?" The silhouette asked me. He/she walked closer and closer to where I lay. The person stopped and bent down, and I started to recognize the face. It was…Caleb?
"Spencer? Hey, are you alright? What happened…? And wh-why are you…crying?"
I wrapped my arms around his neck and bawled into his chest, soaking it deeply with my tears. His hands awkwardly patted my back, trying his best to comfort me.
"Uhh…Spencer…I don't mind you drowning me in your tears, but as you can see, we're in the middle of a road. I don't think I'm in the mood to get like, um, ran over," Caleb stated jokingly. I would've laughed at his comical remark, but I only felt like screaming and crying.
He stood up and gave me his hand. I looked at it and was confused as to why he was helping me. He must have noticed my expression and said sincerely, "Spencer, I care about you, so stop looking at me like a freak and just take my hand." He raised his eyebrows and gave me a smirk. But not like his sarcastic smirk, it was more of a reassuring smirk that everything was going to be alright.
I sniffled and wiped my nose. I wrapped my fingers around his, and then he pulled me up onto my feet. "Just go and sit on the passenger side. I'll drive, don't worry," He reassured me, "Your house, right?" I slightly nodded and felt as if my head were to pop off. My stomach felt tense and vomit threatened to explode out of my mouth.
We walked to his car and got in. I was staring out the window thinking about Toby and the times he and I shared. All the laughter, joy, sadness, and anger. Now thinking back at it, I can't believe I was oblivious to the truth. Toby was freaking in love with Hanna, and she was in love with him. And I refused to believe that. They probably did things behind my back, but for now, I could care less. Hanna and Toby were dead to me.
"Hey, uh, want me to call Aria or Emily or Hanna? Is that okay? I can call them for you….if you want," Caleb said cautiously, breaking me from my thoughts. It seemed like he was afraid I was going to freak out and explode if he said something wrong.
I would never tell Emily or Aria about what had just happened. And especially not…Hanna.
Crap. He has no idea about Hanna and Toby. How could she just act like she loves Caleb, when clearly she is in love with my boyfriend—well, ex-boyfriend?
I didn't reply to Caleb, and he seemed to notice. All of a sudden, the car came to an abrupt stop. I realized we were in my driveway.
Caleb looked at me, waiting for me to turn towards him. I glanced at him slightly and looked at my feet. My shoes were all torn, and the left shoe was untied. I probably looked like crap right now, but I didn't care. I even felt like crap. He started to say something but quickly shut his mouth. Caleb looked deeply at me, curious for an answer.
I felt bad for shutting him out, so I broke the silence and quietly said, "C-caleb. Thank you….f-for picking me up and helping me. No one else would have. Sorry I have been really quiet…I-I just—something happened. But I'm fine." I smiled. It felt real, but deep down, I knew I didn't mean it. I really wasn't fine. At all.
Caleb glanced at his hands, and then back up at me. I couldn't read anything his expression was telling me. He slowly reached his hand out and softly grasped mine. My eyes landed on our intertwined hands, and then I glanced back up at him.
"Hey, Spencer. It's fine. Anytime okay? I'd do anything for my friends, especially you. You would've done the same anyway," Caleb said sincerely. He softly squeezed my hand, while he gave me a sincere smile.
He flashed me a small grin, and he seemed to have something on his mind because he furrowed his eyebrows. "I don't mean to pry, but…what exactly is Spencer Hastings doing on a school night running and crying, instead of studying?" I swallowed hard.
I can't tell him. He would be heartbroken.
I wanted to run out of that car and just run away, but he deserves to know. Caleb wouldn't keep this from me if he knew, so why don't I just tell him?
"Caleb, I don't think you should know. It's about Toby and….and…," I said cautiously, "….and Hanna."
His face hardened, but he didn't look surprised. It seemed as if Caleb was practicing for the news about Toby and Hanna. Did he already know?
He gritted his teeth, and his expression grew fiercer. Caleb asked through gritted teeth, "What do you mean….Toby and Hanna?"
I gulped. Caleb looked at me with his soft, brown eyes anxious for a reply like a child's face when they want something at a store—all naïve and clueless about the world. About the suffering things the world has to offer.
He didn't know, and I don't think he should, but too late now. I braced myself for his reaction as I gave him the heart breaking news.
(Caleb's POV)
"What do you mean….Toby and Hanna?" I asked as fury was building up inside of me.
Spencer gave me a worried expression, the one that doctors gave to inform you that one of your relatives just died. At that moment, I knew it wasn't going to be good. Spencer's misty eyes told me that I should just run far away. Far away.
Spencer gulped and then stated, "Hanna….she-she loves Toby. They're both in love with each other."
My heart sank. I felt like I was just stabbed one million times in the gut.
I knew it. I just knew it.
I looked at Spencer to see if she was pranking me or joking, but her expression reflected the way I was feeling.
"Wh-what? You're kidding me, right? You have to be joking! Hanna, sh-she can't love Toby. She loves me…right?" I asked innocently. I knew Spencer was speaking the truth. Tears formed in my eyes.
"I am so sorry, Caleb. Hanna….doesn't love you. Toby doesn't love me. They love each….other," Spencer said sympathetically.
Anger, sadness, frustration, and all negative emotions built up inside of me. I wanted to scream and cry. I yanked my hands from Spencer's and opened the car door violently. My feet touched the hard sidewalk, and my legs felt like pencil lead. I was going to sprint as far as I could take myself, but the whole world was spinning furiously, so I couldn't think. I couldn't focus. My mind disobeyed my aching body and forced me to run forward. But a hand grabbed my forearm and stopped me from escaping.
"Caleb! Stop!" Spencer's firm voice filled throughout my ears, "I know how much you're hurting. I still am, okay? But don't do anything stupid or anything you'll regret."
I whipped my body around and looked her into the eye. I screamed, "Do anything I'll regret? Too late for that. I regret loving Hanna. How did I not see this?! I LOVED HER, SPENCER! AND SHE COULD JUST GO TO TOBY BEHIND MY BACK, AND FALL IN LOVE WITH HIM?! YOU KNOW WHAT?! I-I…I…." I couldn't think of what to say as I started bawling out into tears. My knees buckled, and I fell onto the stiff sidewalk.
Spencer hugged me tightly, and I buried my head in her shoulders. She whispered softly in my ear, cooing me that everything will be alright.
She started to cry on my shoulders because I heard her sniffling, but I didn't mind at all.
My hands softly rubbed her hair, and I inhaled her smell. Its aroma lingered of vanilla, and my whole body shivered from the familiar smell. We sat there in silence, which seemed like an eternity, but was probably only 7 minutes.
My body melted into her protective shell, and I felt safe for once in a long time. My arms wrapped around her waist, and her warmth made me shudder.
"It's going to be fine, okay? You are an amazing person, and you will find someone better. You will. I am sure of it. You deserve the best. It's Hanna's loss, okay? It is going to be alright," Spencer softly reassured me.
After a few moments of silence, I calmed down. I pulled back carefully and studied her solemn face. The expression she wore looked like she wanted to burst into tears, but was trying to hold them back to be strong. Spencer Hastings….always trying to show that she is tough and doesn't give in, especially give in to crying.
I quietly mumbled, "Spencer….it's also Toby's loss. He doesn't know what he is going to be losing."
Her hair was hanging like a veil over her eager eyes. I slowly brought my hands up and combed her hair back and pulled it behind her ear. Spencer's mouth gaped a little bit more open because of what I just did. Our eyes locked and for once in a long time, I felt wanted.
"Toby is definitely an idiot for leaving you, and I hope he pays." Spencer chuckled lightly at my comment, and I gazed into her eyes.
I found myself getting lost in my own world by just observing Spencer. Her eyes met mine, and we shared a smile.
I've always thought of her as an uptight nerd that needed to take a chill pill, but now….now she seemed different. A good different. Her soft side made her seem more…beautiful. I never thought I would ever think that, but she was making me change my mind.
Spencer broke the silence and started to say, "Well, that makes us even huh?" I looked at her in confusion.
She grinned, "You know…? Since my shirt is now soaking in your tears and your shirt is soaking in mine?" I laughed lightly and nodded.
"At least we don't have to wash it," I stated amusingly. We both chuckled at the comment. After the laughter died down, silence washed over us, and we sat there in quietness for a few moments.
I sat down crisscrossed, and she did the same. After about 5 minutes of no sound, I broke the silence.
I asked her curiously, "Did you ever expect Toby and Hanna to….you know." Her expression saddened, and I soon regretted bringing them two up.
"Honestly?" She asked, "Yea….kind of. I mean I always noticed them two stealing glances from each other and sharing inside jokes. Toby always blushed, when she interrupted us two having a moment. But I don't care anymore. I'd rather him to break it off because I wouldn't have the guts to. Ha...well, how bout you? Did you ever notice something…ehhh…peculiar?"
I tilted my head and bit my lips, trying to think of a reply.
I quietly, but audibly stated, "Yea. Not really. I mean, Toby isn't Hanna's type…I think, but I mean, whatever floats her boat." I chuckled and then sighed, "Spencer, how come someone turns into something you were afraid of them becoming?"
She glanced softly in my direction and then mumbled, "I don't know. I always wonder the same thing. Life sucks sometimes, but I mean life is life, so you either suck it up and live on or dwell on the past, which does not end up well, heh."
Spencer and I shared a nice look, and I felt kind of nervous, but I had no idea why. I shook it off and offered, "Hey well…it's getting late, you should sleep now. You don't want to fail that Physics test tomorrow."
All of a sudden her eyes widened with panic and she said frantically, "WHAT?! I totally forgot about that! UGHHHHH!" She buried her head in her arms and sighed. I giggled, and she whipped her head up and slapped my arm.
"I should go study, Caleb," Spencer said reluctantly. Almost like she resented the thought of leaving.
I stood up and stretched, and Spencer did the walked towards her front door.
(3rd POV)
Caleb and Spencer were now in front of her door.
"So let's call it a night, and I'll head back to my place. Thanks. For everything," Caleb stated.
"Anytime! And thank you too, you know, for uh everything," Spencer said softly, "So what are you going to tell Hanna?"
"Hmmmm…Let's see…," Caleb muttered sarcastically, "Oh! Here's an idea! Break up with her!" We shared a laugh.
"So…goodnight?" Spencer mumbled curiously.
"Ha, goodnight!" Caleb said with a soft grin. Spencer left and entered her house.
Caleb pulled out his phone and texted Hanna, "Hey. We are done. This relationship is over. And make sure to say hi to Toby for me!"
Caleb put his phone up, and it vibrated with notifications over at least 2 billion times—most likely 99% of it from Hanna. He ignored it, and started to laugh.
Wow, he thought. What a night!
To his surprise, he got over Hanna rather quick. Maybe because he knew this was bound to happen sooner or later.
Caleb—without thinking—rushed back and knocked on Spencer's door. She opened it right after the first knock, as if she was waiting for him.
They looked at each other in shock. Caleb hugged her tightly, and Spencer soon hugged back, sharing the embrace. After about what seemed like forever, they pulled back.
Their eyes were locked, but they didn't say a word. All Caleb did was quickly lean in and peck her cheek with a soft kiss. Spencer was shocked, but she gave him a nice smile. All he did was return the gesture and wave goodbye.
As Caleb walked away and into his car, Spencer closed the door and leaned against it and slid down. She couldn't believe what just happened. The kiss still lingered there, but Spencer was more than okay with that.
Caleb walked into his car, and he smiled. He was surprised for what he did, but he was more than glad that he did it.
And for once in their lives, they had feelings for one another. Spencer and Caleb felt something for each other. It was about time!
The End
