Chapter 1

Somewhere in her dreams she knew something was wrong. It was a pressure… a pressure weighing on her chest. She was trapped, trapped in the rubble of the Metro Court. Trapped and dying.

She reached out her hand for Jason, felt through the chunks of concrete and the shards of glass, she even tried to call his name, but there was only silence around her.

"Jason?" She could hear the fear in her voice and refused to believe that he'd left her.

"Jason?" The weight pressed down on her chest cutting off any of the air she was trying to squeeze into her lungs by sheer force. It was getting near impossible to think except for the one pervasive worry utmost in her mind. "Jason, are you… here? Jason?" She was fighting… fighting the fear that Jason wasn't answering her because… because he wasn't able to.

"Please, Jason… answer me."

It was only the third time he'd come by the building tonight. The first time, he'd seen her at the window staring out into the night. She'd totally missed seeing him, her gaze had never ventured lower than the rooftops. The night sky had kept her interest and that was fine with him. Jason watched her set one hand on the window frame and the other over her rounded belly.

A mix of emotions flooded through him. Pain, worry, pride… love. It took his breath away. Love. It fed him, ate at him, lifted him up and then cast him adrift. It was starting to drive him insane.

'Starting?'

'Oh great,' he thought, his conscience was mocking him.

A soft surprised smile lighted her face and her hand shifted a few inches to one side, a gentle caress. The baby was moving.

He knew it, knew it in his heart more than his head. He'd felt it for the first time a few days before, while they were trapped in the elevator of the Metro Court.

Elizabeth turned away from the window and he got back in the car and nodded to the driver.

The second time, it had been Lucky framed in the other set of windows, the bedroom dark, Elizabeth asleep. Lucky had paced back and forth, his body fraught with nervous energy. There was a distracted twist to Lucky's movements, something that made his jaw ache. It wasn't an easy feeling and when Lucky headed back into the shadows Jason checked his watch. 10:30pm. He'd come back. He'd come back and make sure that everything was alright.

So now, it was just after midnight and he hadn't even gotten out of the car when fear shivered up his spine. "Elizabeth." He said the name like a prayer rolling off his lips. Was she alright?

He nearly threw open the door and stepped into the street. Heat. The single thought was in his head. A single word filled with dread.

Jason looked up at the apartment and saw the lights on in the main room. What was Lucky doing still up at this hour? He moved closer, listening intently to the street around him. Silent, save for the gentle rain falling down around him, bathing the street in midnight ink. The fans must be on… the curtains were fairly dancing against the glass. Nearly across the street Jason had to step out of the way of a taxi sloshing through behind him.

Stepping up onto the sidewalk he looked up again as the pop and crinkle of breaking glass reached his ears.

A corner of Elizabeth's curtains reached out into the night air, lit from behind by a snapping yellow light. Not the electric lights that Jason had thought initially. No, finally from this vantage point he could see the reality of the situation. The kitchen of Elizabeth's apartment was on fire.

Part 2

A little before 11:30pm that same night…

It had been three days since he'd started back on the pills… four since Liz had rolled over in bed and whispered in her sleep.

"Jason."

At first, he'd tried to rationalize it. Jason had saved Elizabeth… and his baby. Bobbie had told him that Elizabeth might have flashbacks from her captivity… crying, fear, depression… he'd been prepared for that.

Having her slide her hand over his chest, snuggle against his side and sigh, "Jason," hadn't been any of the things his aunt has mentioned. So, that first night he'd sat up in bed, mind whirling with questions.

Really, he knew that she and Jason had a past. That's why he never wanted her near the man. Seriously, Jason Morgan had gone after Liz when everyone thought that he'd been dead. He'd known that Jason Morgan was pretty much devoid of emotion, but moving in on Liz while she was grieving, that had been cold. Stone cold.

He flashed back to the night Jason had found Elizabeth in the snow, after her accident. He'd seen Jason sitting beside her bed in General Hospital and he hadn't really thought about it then, but now... hearing Elizabeth say his name, Lucky had to wonder. "What about him?" Why was Jason always there… where he should be. "I'm her husband… fiancé," he corrected.

"What?" Elizabeth stirred beside him, blinking up at him in the near dark. "Lucky? What is it?"

Slipping off the bed he gave her a little shrug. "Nothing really, just have to take care of a few things. Go back to sleep."

He hadn't even waited to see if she did slip back into sleep, making a straight line for the couch, picking up the remote as he went. That had been a total waste. At this hour, with just the basic cable, all that was left was infomercials and 1-900 number adds.

So, desperate for something to distract him, he'd investigated the refrigerator and found nothing but healthy food. Having a pregnant wife and young child in the house that's all they had. It had been awhile since he'd seen the refrigerator with a beer in it. Well, that had been until Elizabeth moved back in and it was beginning to feel like forever.

He shut the door of the refrigerator and headed over to the closet. He remembered he had a few beers still in the box, near the back, behind Cameron's old stuff. He needed a beer to take the edge off, that's all. He reached up to pull the cord for the light and found out the hard way that it was burned out, so he pushed his hand through the boxes of clothes and toys and felt around for the familiar chill of a glass bottle.

Lucky smiled as his fingers wrapped around the neck of the bottle, but an inch or two from the doorway, it caught on something and fell with a clunk on the floor. He heard it roll toward the back of the closet with a sinking feeling in his middle.

Getting down on his knees he walked his fingers along the closet floor and felt the cool slide of a glass neck beneath his pointer finger. He reached again and his fingers caught the neck along with a little piece of plastic. He pulled the bottle out from the closet and stared at it clutched in his hand.

Trapped between the neck of the bottle and his fingers was a little plastic bag with six pills.

Lucky sat down on the floor, his back up against the wall, the little bag held in the flat of his hand. The only thought in his mind was, "Why didn't Elizabeth get rid of this?" Elizabeth. He'd almost lost her… lost her and the baby… his baby. He'd almost lost them, but Jason had saved her… saved them both.

Now, Liz was home with him, home but her mind had been so many other places… when Cameron wasn't around she was quiet, almost silent. Her thoughts taking her attention from him and now here he was… his hand full of pills. Elizabeth asleep.

And dreaming of Jason.

"And what about me?" With her it was always the children. Cameron's safety, his happiness, that came first. Next the new baby. She'd love the baby, of course, he did too… but when the baby was born… how would he fit in?

He opened the bag and shook out one pill. Then another. He held them up to the light, looking at them with the eyes of a policeman for a moment. They were perfect, straight from the dealer… and they were his.

And suddenly, they were gone. He put his head back against the wall and waited for the drugs to take effect.

Tonight, he sat starting at the same bag… empty, open, gaping.

Empty.

Just go to sleep.

It's empty.

Go to sleep.

He reached for the phone and dialed an old familiar number.

Three rings later. "Hey... this is Maxie's phone. Sorry, you missed me…" she kept going but he hung up. Leaving her a message wasn't what he wanted. Needed. He needed help, right now.

He needed pills.

He lifted the phone from the cradle again and called another number, one he had to fight to remember. An old informant that knew just who to call in such an emergency.

It was after the second ring. "What?"

"Tom, this is Lucky Spenser."

"You callin' as a cop?"

"No... not tonight…"

A pause. "Then what?"

"I need you to get me something… for my nerves."

He heard the chuckle and knew the smug look that went with it. "I thought you were clean, man."

"I'm off the stuff, really, Tom, this is just to get me through a rough patch. 'Sides, what does it matter to you as long as I've got money."

"Yeah," Tom agreed, "it'll cost you alright."

"Then where do I go?" It only took a few seconds to scribble down the instructions: an intersection, a corner, a bar. He'd done that trip before. Hanging up the phone he reached for his keys on the counter.

"Lucky?"

He froze for a moment and then turned around slowly, forcing a calm 'normal' smile on his face. "Elizabeth? Something wrong with the baby?"

She was standing in the doorway, her robe thrown on, untied, hair in disarray around her face. "No... No... I just woke up and wondered where you were."

"I was… hungry. I was going to make a sandwich or something. You... ah, you want something?"

Elizabeth gave him a little smile. "Yeah… the pills the doctor gave me turned my stomach last night."

"You didn't eat much at dinner."

She nodded. "Can you warm me up some soup?"

"Soup?" Luck looked around the counter top.

"It's behind you," she pointed behind him in the corner. There was a paper bag full of groceries tucked in the corner. "Sorry, I didn't get a chance to put it away earlier. Can you-"

"Yeah, yeah.. go back to sleep, honey. I'll take care of things."

Yawning a little she gave him a smile. "Okay… I'm going to crawl back under the covers for a bit, let me know when it's ready."

"Sure… sure…" Lucky opened the cupboard and took out a small pot and fished a can of soup from the grocery bag. It killed him that he was just waiting for her to go back in the room so he could leave. She closed the door to the bedroom as he finished emptying the can into the pot.

Checking his watch he realized that if he didn't leave now, he'd be late. Due to the nature of his 'business' Tom never waited around. If you were late… you were out of luck. Giving a quick look to the closed bedroom door Lucky turned the dial on the stove, setting it a level below where it should be, "Just enough time for me to get to the corner and back and finish the soup."

Again, he reached for his keys and shoved them in his pocket letting the door slip from his fingers and nearly bang shut.

As Lucky ran down the stairs he hopped he hadn't made enough noise to wake Elizabeth up. He was in luck on one count. Elizabeth was sound asleep thanks to the wonderful pills from Doctor Lee, on the other hand, the vibrations from the door, tipped the grocery bag on the counter over… right onto the burner.