Dear soulmate, my heart is surrounded by your love.
Her arms crossed firmly over her chest, Livia stared by the window of the shiny black car as the landscape passed quickly in front of her eyes. It was a rainy day and she looked up at the grey sky, watching rain drops falling sweetly around her. It seemed to express the feelings inside of her that she was trying to hide, and despite the warmth in the car, she shivered at this thought. The sun had already set and it was obvious even though the sky was filled with clouds.
"I missed you so much."
Livia's face remained expressionless as the words came to her ears. She didn't want to be here, she didn't want to follow her mother. All she wanted to do was go back to her home with her father, but it was impossible and instead to feel sadness, anger was making her heartbeats accelerate.
She ignored her mother's words and kept looking outside, avoiding eye contact. Every time she saw her mom, it seemed like she was looking in a magic mirror, showing her exactly what she would look like in twenty-five years. It was somewhat scary, but also annoying. Her mother didn't take care of her, and when her parents divorced, she went to live with her father. If only he had waited until she was the legal age, she wouldn't have to go back to the place where she spent her childhood. She didn't have many memories from that time, but the ones she had were not what we could call good.
"Oh, do you remember Jacob Black?"
If she remembered Jacob Black? How could she ever forget the annoying little boy that spent his days teasing her as a kid? She raised her nose in a grimace still playing the silence game.
"You may not recognize him." her mother kept soliloquizing. "He turned into a gorgeous young man."
Rolling her eyes, Livia moved a little on the bench trying to find a better position but without any success. It didn't matter much since her mother parked the car in front of a small beige house and Livia sighed subtily of relief : she was going to lock herself in her new room for the night. That's really all she wanted to do. As her hand grabbed the knob, her mother turned to her and without thinking, their eyes met.
Maggie was a beautiful woman, but the problems she had in her life left more wrinkles on her soft face than it was supposed to. Her waterfall of dark brown hair fell over her shoulder as she licked her tiny lips nervously, an habit her daughter had inherited of.
"A lot of things have changed, Olivia."
It seemed to be innocent words, but Livia heard the gravity of the situation in her mother's voice, making her frown only half a second. Maggie noticed, Livia was sure of it, but she remained silent. The young girl stared at her mother, trying to decipher the message her facial expression was trying to send her, but gave up after a while and got out of the car.
The inside of the house was cozy and welcoming, and when Maggie turned on the light, Livia took a big breath, familiar smells coming to her nostrils and sending flashbacks in her mind. She had not stepped foot in there for over ten years and she had missed it, although she would never admit it. Putting her hands nonchalently in her pockets, she turned to her mother.
"Your room is still there." she expressed. "I didn't move anything."
With a frown, livia walked reluctantly to the furthest door, pushing slowly on it. Maggie didn't lie, everything was exactly where she had left it. The walls were still a soft shade of pink, a large mirror was placed on the left wall and right below stood her wood drawer, decorated with different useless accessories she liked as a kid. But the thing that really made her smile was the small twin bed that was placed right in the middle of the room. The sheets was colored with light purple, blue and green flowers, and laying against the two pillows was her old doll, the one she used to carry around everywhere.
"Maybe you'll want to change some things here." Her mother proposed, appearing behind her. "You're not a little girl anymore."
Turning around, Livia felt her mother's hand carress softly her cheek as a sad smile crossed her lips.
"I feel like I've missed so many years."
And she had. Livia was not going to tell her, but they both had missed on a lot of good things, by being separated. It was too late to get into a fight though, and the young girl simply smiled to her mother.
"I'm going to get a rest, now." Maggie sighed. "You're here at home, do whatever you like."
When she left, Livia felt like someone had taken a heavy pound out of her shoulders, and the stress that was compressing her lungs disapeared. She took advantage of it and filled her lungs with the familiar odors this specific room had and grabbed her purse, taking out her cigarettes and a lighter out. Even if they were not exactly on good terms, she couldn't resign herself to smoke inside. She had been raised well, and she knew it was not very respectful. She walked to the other side of the house and opened the backdoor quietly before to quickly light up her white stick, inhaling the only poison she was addicted to.
With a sigh, she looked up at the sky and smiled sadly at the sight. The day had fleed from the night, giving it the entire space, and Livia stared at the millions of stars shinning through the indigo sky. It was beautiful, and she had to admit the quietness of La Push was a good change from the busy nights of New York.
"I don't know how I survived without this sight either."
Livia's heart skipped at the voice, thinking she was alone, and she quickly turned around to notice a petite girl sitting on the balcony, staring at the sky just like she wa sonly some seconds ago. She frowned, the traits of the pretty girl seemed familiar, but she had not stepped foot in this place of the world in so long, it was hard to remember. But when the dark haired girl turned around, Livia had an other flash.
"Julie?"
Somehow, she wanted to get down the stairs and put her arms around her old friend, but the trip had exhausted her, and she was not sure if they were close anymore. After all, is a friendship as strong when it stopped at seven years old?
"I didn't really want to spend my summer here either, I have to admit." Julie simply replied. "I tell myself that every damn year, and I always end up not wanting to leave."
"At least, you're here just for 2 months." Livia made a grimace, jealous that Julie could escape while she was stuck in this town.
Julie had been the only real girl friend she had when she was young. It was hard to believe because of her tiny frame, but when they were kids, she had kicked her own cousin, Jared, where it hurts, and since then, no other boy in La Push ever made fun of either of them... except Jacob, of course.
Livia sighed and rolled her eyes again at the thought of him. She didn't like him, she never would, and although she was older now, she wouldn't hesitate to imitate younger Julie.
"Why are you here anyway?" Julie wondered, taking a sip of her hot chocolate and rising her nose in a grimace at the warmth of it.
Once again, Livia crossed her arms. To anyone who really knew her, it meant she was not going to talk about it. The discussion was closed. But Julie was not just anyone. She was the kind of person you can't be mean to.
"To live with my mother." Livia simply replied, hoping Julie wouldn't ask any more questions. "When did you arrive?"
She hoped that changing the subject quickly would make Julie forget about the reason of Livia's presence, and it seemed to work.
"Five days ago." the pretty black haired girl informed. "I haven't stepped foot out of this house with the exception of this exact spot."
Julie laughed lightly, making Livia smile sincerely. They were not so different, and it had always been that way.
"How's your cousin?" Livia wondered, taking an other puff off her cigarette.
"An ass." Julie half-joked. "He's spending all his time with his friend and his girl."
"I never thought Jared would ever be in a steady relationship." the dark brunette admitted.
"Last time you saw him he was seven, give him a chance." Julie laughed some more.
This time, Livia added her laughter to hers. And then, the silence fell, making Livia's eyelit want to shut more and more.
"I'll see you tomorrow night, then."
Crushing her cigarette in the ashtray left on the table outside, she made a sign to Julie who waved back. It was so simple with Julie, and that's the best encounter Livia had in days. Feeling a little better, she walked to her room and closed the door behind her before to let herself fall on her bed, grabbing her doll and taking her close to her in a tight and juvenile hug. When she was going to fall asleep, a smiling face seemed to appear in her head.
"Good night, dad." she whispered. "Wherever you are."
