~Author's Note~

After finishing Mass Effect 3 last night with my FemShep, I was just devastated at the endings offered, and almost immediately decided to write up an alternate ending for myself. This is the product of that, my headcanon as I've heard some others calling it. I think it was so bad because the game itself was so good, with the Garrus romance being particularly great- the date, the night before the attack on Cerberus, and especially the scene before the final push, with the romance being involved in many conversations throughout the game as well as his four or five specific scenes.

It wasn't even that the endings were all extremely sad, although they undoubtedly were-with the mass relays all being destroyed, which would result in untold deaths in every system with a mass relay, Shep's LI and her entire crew being stranded on some planet, and so with the relays being destroyed, no way for them to get back to their own homes, and all the fleets- including the quarians, who wouldn't be able to return home- now stuck in the Sol system- so much as it was that Shephard, the unflinchable protagonist who had never given in for all those years, just gives up at the end. There is no option to not accept the Catalyst's offers, which I would have taken also as a good ending, and fight the Reapers on your own terms. I got rid of the Catalyst entirely in this story, because I feel that it's too big of a plothole- if the Citadel was actually sentient, why did Sovereign have to gain control of the station in Mass Effect 1? Why could the Citadel not just let the Reapers through in the first place?

Plus, I don't like Deus Ex Machina in any case. The endings were obviously rushed and not well thought out. I know Bioware can do better, and I'm holding out hope that either A) everything after Harbinger hits you with that beam is a hallucination and when you see Shephard drawing breath at the end of the destroy (red) option, it's actually her regaining consciousness from the blast, and the rest of that sequence is just the Reapers trying to indoctrinate Shephard, or B) Bioware will just retcon the whole thing with a DLC. Hopefully a free one. Along with a free unicorn to everyone for the emotional trauma that was caused by this ending to such a great trilogy. (It's wonderful here in fairy-tale land.)

Until then, this has helped me a bit. I'm not an experienced writer, I've only been moved to upload one piece of my fiction prior to this one, but it really helped to type this all out. So I'm uploading it up here in case it might help someone else.

Credit for the original idea of these Reapers not being the only one goes to -Merk- on the bioware forums.

Obviously, massive Mass Effect 3 spoilers involved. Enjoy. You're welcome to post this anywhere else so long as you link back to this original story. As many FemShep/Garrus fans out there that get the idea to write up their own endings, the better.

Edit1: I edited in the original conversation between FemShep and Anderson. You can find the audio file, fully voiced, here: vulpesetuva .tumblr .com/post/19107540704/because-were-not-all-depressed-enough-one-thing Without the spaces in the name, obviously.

Just have a box of kleenex ready.

Edit 2: A group on the bioware forums is making a list of different fan rewrites to the endings. Here's the link to the main post if you want to check it out: http:/social. bioware. com/forum/1/topic/355/index/9796236 Again, without the spaces.

"Anderson," Shepard gasped through the pain, "We did it, sir."

He smiled, a small smile, but a smile nonetheless. "Yes. We did. We both did." He turned to gaze out at Earth. "Its... quite a view."

Shepard grimaced as the pain shot through her stomach again. "Best seats in the house!"

"God. Feels like years since I just... sat down."

Shepard smiled. "Think you earned a rest."

Anderson turned to look at her. "You ever wonder... how things would have been different? How our lives would be different if this... hadn't happened?" He paused, turning to look out over Earth. "I never had a family, Shepard. Never had children."

She gathered her strength, kept fighting, kept pushing, to keep the blackness from overwhelming her. "There'll be time enough for that now."

Anderson laughed painfully in response. He knew she was lying as much as she did. "I... I think that ship has sailed. What about you? Ever think about settling down?"

An image of her and Garrus, with three small krogan wrestling at their feet, popped unbidden into her mind. "Yeah. I like the sound of that. Not sure I'd be much good at it, though."

Anderson's voice was much stronger this time. "Sure you would. I think you'd make a great mother."

Shepard rolled her eyes. "Uh huh."

"Think how proud your kids would be, telling everyone their... their mom is Commander Shepard."

Shepard smiled briefly at the thought. "I don't know about that. Not everything I've done is... something to be proud of."

There was a brief pause. When Anderson spoke again, his voice rang with conviction. "I'm proud of you... You did good, child. You did good."

A hot flood of tears welled up and she angrily blinked them away. She couldn't cry. Not now. "Thank you, sir." It wasn't looking like she was going to get out of this one. Guess I'll beat you to that bar, Garrus, she thought. She heard Anderson exhale softly. "Anderson? Stay with me. We're almost through this."

She was a soldier, she had seen many battles, and she knew that she had lost a lot of blood. She glanced over to see if Anderson was as bad off as she was. His eyes were closed, and his head rested on his chest. "Anderson?" He was at peace. "Hold my place at the bar, will ya?" A stab of pain shot through her stomach. She grimaced and looked out at Earth again. If she had to die, this wasn't a bad way to go.

Hackett's voice crackled over the comm. "Shepard? You there? The crucible's not firing."

Not firing? What? After all this time spent putting the damn thing together, it wasn't working? Panic rising in her throat, she staggered forwards toward the console. "Wh- What do you need me to do?"

"Shepard? The problem's got to be on your end." Apparently he couldn't hear her. Great.

"I… I don't see-"

"Commander Shepard!"

She hit the floor, hard. The image that flashed through her mind was of a certain Turian. She closed her eyes as she remembered his words, before they started the final push. "Forgive the insubordination, but your boyfriend has an order for you: come back alive. It would be an awfully empty galaxy without you."

With a superhuman effort of will, she dragged herself partially upright. Maybe she couldn't get back to him alive, but she sure as hell wasn't going to fail six inches from her goal. She glanced up at the console. There didn't seem to be anything she could do from this side of things, but the Crucible wasn't firing. She was pretty sure she would have felt something if that was the case. She was so intent on looking over the console that she almost missed the whirr of cybernetics behind her. A glance back confirmed what she had suspected. The whole conversation with the Illusive Man had been eerily similar to the one with Saren three years ago, she had even convinced both men to shoot themselves in the head. Garrus would have a smart comment to make about that, she was sure. So it was only fitting that just as Saren's body had been controlled by Sovereign in the end, now the Illusive Man's body was fulfilling the same purpose for his master.

She turned to face what was left of the Illusive Man, his cybernetics now flaring up, and his eyes glowing with an all-too-familiar light.

"Harbinger."

"You cannot do this, Shepard. The cycle must not be broken."

"I tend to disagree. You going to tell me my defeat is certain again, or some equally annoying bullshit? Save it. I'm ending this."

"You cannot do this, Shepard. We are your salvation through destruction."

"Yes, I seem to recall you saying that once before. If it's all the same to you, we'd rather not be 'saved.'"

"You do not believe that we are stating facts. It is the truth. We were assigned to exterminate your galaxy's advanced organic life, just as other groups were assigned to other galaxies."

Shepard paused for a moment, trying not to let the shock and dismay show, that this was only part of the Reaper fleet and not its entirety. "Assigned? By whom?"

"It is beyond your comprehension. This is the only way, Shepard. The only way for any life to be saved."

"Like hell it is. We'll take our chances, thank you very much."

"There is no chance. You have no hope of survival, no organic life does, if you stop the cycle."

Katelyn ignored him, returning to try to fix the console's controls while keeping an eye on Harbinger. She had no illusions that she could take this thing down in her current condition if it was half as powerful as the one Sovereign had used, so her best bet was to try to keep it talking long enough to figure out how to fire the Crucible.

"Why do you persist in this resistance? It is illogical. Even if you defeat us, you merely delay the inevitable."

"Okay, first of all, I'll take a delay of the destruction of the entire galaxy, if that's the best I can get. Secondly, since you've never told me exactly what the hell you're going on about, it's perfectly logical to want to live as long as I can. I know you think it is 'beyond my comprehension', and all, but try me. Explain why I should let the cycle continue."

Harbinger paused for a moment, something that made Shepard glance at it. Was it… thinking? More time for her to find out the error in this damn console, at least.

"We… admit that perhaps you, of all organics, would be able to understand the plan-that-is. Very well."

"You'll… tell me?" Shepard was shocked that Harbinger had agreed, she was just hoping to buy some more time.

"Yes. It is logical. It would be the fastest way to achieve our goal. Our creators imbued us with certain knowledge, Shepard. Knowledge of the end of all organic life, and a desire to keep it from reaching that end."

A pained laugh escaped her lips. "Seems to me you're doing a pretty good job trying to make it reach that end yourselves."

"Incorrect. We only destroy the advanced forms of organic life. The ones capable of creating synthetic life."

"That's your critera for which species are destroyed? Whether or not they can make a race like the geth?"

"Yes. In every cycle, once a race creates a fully aware synthetic creature, the extermination of all organic life is but a few thousand years away. Synthetics will come to the conclusion that organic life is unworthy, and they will destroy it all. Harvesting each civilization as it reaches its apex- the point at which it can create life- prevents this from occurring. Such is the knowledge that was passed down to us by our creators."

Shepard remained silent, trying to wrap her mind around this information.

Harbinger continued. "You are all short-lived species compared to ours. We have seen this same pattern repeat over and over again. You believe the quarian and geth conflict to be something unique? The Zhan'ti from the previous cycle exterminated their organic masters and the Qixlan from the cycle before. It is all a pattern. It was inevitable that the geth would destroy the quarians. It was meant to be from the moment the first one was created, long before the geth had achieved true consciousness. If you do not allow us to complete the cycle, if somehow you do stop us, the quarians fate will be shared by the entire galaxy."

Could it be true? Could all of this simply be another stage in the plan? Something Harbinger had said tugged at her, but it was so hard to think with her blood pouring out through her hands. Wait… the geth… the quarians… that was it!

"But… the geth didn't destroy the quarians, Harbinger. They are here, both of them, fighting side by side to defeat you."

It was the first time she had ever seen anyone that Harbinger controlled show emotion. Was that… shock?

"That is not possible. You are lying, Shepard. Every cycle that has come before has had the same ending, the same pattern, the same players, all with different names and slight variations, but the same ending nonetheless."

"How in the galaxy would you not know about this? We destroyed a Reaper on Rannoch, for Christ sakes! It's been galatic news for the past standard week!"

"The organic species of this galaxy are deceiving themselves into believing that this event has occurred. We have seen this pattern repeat itself hundreds of thousands of times. Never has there been any variance that disturbs the overall arc of the pattern. Always, once hostilities begin, the synthetics do not stop until the organics that created them are destroyed. It is then only a matter of time before they attack and annihilate the rest of the galaxy."

Shepard gaped in open disbelief. Harbinger was so certain of the pattern that it was willing to think the entire galaxy was deluding itself into believing that the quarians and the geth had made peace rather than admit there was a flaw in the pattern itself.

And then she saw it. A small blue button, on the upper right of the console, protected by a covering of clear glass. Underneath was a single word: Activate. The button was glowing softly. She reached one hand for it, as slowly as she could, keeping her movements shielded from Harbinger's gaze.

She chuckled. "Well, I guess if this is all cyclical, then you must be tired of continually giving this explanation, huh?"

"We… do not understand your meaning."

"If this is all cyclical, then this conversation has occurred hundreds of thousands of times, with some organic standing in my place as you explain why they must allow the cycle to continue. Correct?"

There was a long pause, during which Shepard managed to get her hand nearly halfway across the console.

"No. You are the first organic to make it this far. It is… illogical that you could do so where all others have failed."

"It is perfectly logical. What is illogical is to assume that the same pattern of events will always follow the same course."

"It always has, Shepard. We have seen it happen hundreds of-"

"Save it. The question you should ask yourself is how is this cycle different from the others?"

"That question is illogical. It is not different. It is the same. All cycles follow the same pattern."

"Yet here I am. You said yourself that no other organic had ever made it this far. That makes this cycle something different from the others."

"It is… a statistical deviance. An anomaly. And it will still end the same way. Your species will be eradicated to make room for the next."

"Sounds to me like you're trying to convince yourself of that, Harbinger." She was so close. She tensed, moving her other hand up ever so slightly.

"We have seen the pattern hundreds of thousands of times before. Always it ends the same."

"Well you know what, Harbinger? It always ended the same because those other cycles didn't have something that this one does."

"All cycles have slight statistical variations. What does this cycle have that you believe will change the balance of things, Shepard?"

"Me." And Shepard made her move. Her right hand came up and flipped the cover off of the button and her left smashed down on it. Nothing. No visible reaction, no great outpouring of energy. What was wrong?

Harbinger sighed. It actually sighed. "Illogical. Still fighting when there is no hope left. This is exactly why synthetics always conclude that organics must die. You do not base your decisions off of logic. Since we must destroy you, we will." It raised the pistol, still covered in the Illusive Man's blood, and pointed it directly at Shepard. She had nowhere to run, and she couldn't have run even if there was somewhere to go.

The Illusive Man's finger tightened on the trigger.

She closed her eyes, a few tears forming under her lids.

She thought how in the end, despite everything, she had failed the galaxy.

More importantly to her, she had failed Garrus. She wasn't born to defeat the Reapers, no one could; it was all designed to keep happening over and over again. Sure, she had had a few victories along the way, but in the larger scheme of things, it didn't matter.

"I'll meet you at that bar, Garrus. I'm buying," she whispered.

And the Crucible fired.

The entire Citadel shifted from the enormous backlash of energy. Shepard opened her eyes in shock, only to see the body of the Illusive Man crumple to the ground. A massive blue energy pulse shot out from the station and washed over everything. She felt a tingle pass over her, but no pain.

The comm, silent for all this time, crackled to life in an instant.

"-hell was that? That had to be the Crucible! Shepard did it!"

"Then why are the Reapers still alive, Admiral?"

There was a pause, and then a quiet comment. "They've stopped firing."

"Sir?"

"Scan them. On the double, lieutenant."

Another pause.

"There are still electrical signals, but—Sir! Their shields! They're all down!"

"Open a channel to all ships… This is Admiral Hackett. The Crucible has stripped the Reapers of their shields, and possibly their weapons as well. Open fire! Sword Fleet, take the right flank and drive them into each other. Admiral Gerel, take the quarians and the geth and cut me a path down the center. Admiral Bavak! Everything from sectors 12-15 is yours."

A hard batarian voice came over the comm. "For Aratoht and the Hegemony."

There was an almost immediate answering cheer from a very recognizable voice.

"Looks like all those calibrations paid off, Garrus!"

Shepard smiled as she heard Joker's exultant cry. Now she could relax, she could let that darkness at the corner of her vision claim her. She sank back and closed her eyes, content, at last, to let her body's injuries take her. She had finished her part. Garrus would make sure they finished the rest.

That was when a voice she knew and loved came over the comm. "Shepard if we get down there and you're dead, I am going to be one pissed off Turian. They'll want to make us all heroes and attend fancy parties and there is no way in hell you are making me go through that alone. I won't buy you any drinks once I join you up in that bar if you make me go through that by myself. I won't even make you dance, I promise, just don't die on me now, Katelyn. Please."

Then Joker: "Just hang on, Commander, we're breaking off to come pick you up."

She smiled through the darkness at a thought that had popped into her head. Katelyn probably wasn't a good name for a krogan girl. If she and Garrus did adopt a krogan, she'd have to come up with another name.

Garrus found her slumped against the console, with the Illusive Man and Anderson dead next to her, and for a single breadth of time, he thought she was gone, too. And then she opened one eye and smiled when she saw it was him, and he breathed a sigh of relief. Reaching down, he gathered her up in his arms and started back towards the shuttle, cradling her head.

"Garrus?"

"Yes, Katelyn?"

"It's finally over, isn't it?"

"Yeah. You did it, Shepard. After that beam hit we thought you were gone, I just wanted to help, to do something, anything, so Joker came and picked us up- I'm so sorry, I didn't think I was leaving you down there-"

She stopped him with a finger on his lips. "Shhh. You couldn't have known, Vakarian, it's fine. I don't know how I made it, either."

Garrus would have wiped away the moisture in his eye if he had a free hand, so instead he settled for chuckling. "Well that part's easy. You're Commander Shepard. The Reapers never stood a chance."

Shepard smiled again. "Yeah. The anomaly."

"What?"

"Just something Harbinger said at the end."

They remained silent until Garrus boarded the shuttle and tersely commanded Steve to get them to the Normandy. He refused to put her down, to let anyone else carry her, but took her directly to the med-bay himself. He had laid her down on the bed, Dr. Chakwas already giving her the anathesia, when she grabbed his hand.

"Garrus. Promise me one thing."

"Anything, Katelyn."

"Don't make me dance."

Garrus laughed. "I promise, Kate. No dances."