Disclaimer- I do not own harry potter and don't claim to.
SLASH Harry/Draco only mentions it nothing graphic.
There are things his friends don't realise or ignore, these are not small things they are major things and the main one concerns them all. It could be the end of their friendship and they know, it but still they ignore it.
Harry Potter is falling apart silently.
Harry knows Ron can hear him crying in the night when silencing charms are forgotten.
He also knows that Ginny likes to pretend that one day they'll get back together and live happily ever after.
Hermione is the worst because he's told her that he's dyeing inside, she told him he'll get over it. That doing this will destroy her. Does she think that for a second that not doing it is destroying him? Does she care?
"I love Draco Malfoy." Harry says this when he is alone and thinks no one can hear, but they do and at times Seamus wishes he could kill Ron, Hermione or Ginny because the sorrow and angst is Harry's voice is enough for Seamus to want to forget he is a man and cry himself to sleep from the unfairness of it all. He wants to comfort Harry but remains silent because he knows that Neville will not be scared to hold Harry while he brakes down. Seamus doesn't look at Harry any more because it hurts to much to see Harry in this shell in which he hides. Seamus has started to feel sorry for Draco Malfoy who isn't fairing much better, he just hides it well.
Neville has never thought he would fell sorry for Harry Potter after Neville still has his parents no matter what state they are in. Neville does not have a madman out for his head. If he was in Harry's position he thinks he would be in a similar position. So Neville does what he can, he holds Harry while breaks down not saying anything because he has no words that will make it better, he has thought of hitting Draco to make this better but he knows it wont. This is Harry's own best friends that have broke him and made him lose the will to live. Neville may no be the most observant or people but he can tell that Draco isn't fairing much better.
"I try not to but i miss him Nev, I love him do much that it hurts. I cry myself to sleep at night and think that maybe it would have hurt less if i died sixteen years ago cause what I'm felling right now can't be worse than death." It is time like these in which Neville Longbottom wished he was better at spells so he could a perform an obliviation charm to wipe away Harry's pain
Harry sits in the bath tub for hours thinking that it will be painless. It would hurt less when this is over that it would be better after would. He could be with his parents and Sirius. He think this as he drags the sharp blade across his pale wrist.
When Ron found him hours later he cried for his loss but he cried harder because he knew this was his fault. He cried hardest because the entire wizarding world was now doomed because of his foolish, childish grudges.