(a/n – I have been talking with fandom members about Jam and Jerusalem recently, and have received some lovely reviews for my Susie/Caroline fics. So here is this piece of nonsense. Because Caroline owns two hula hoops.)

Hip Action

"But Sal, they's cold an' cubeded an' refreshin', ain't they?" Rosie's voice could be heard pleading with the woman who was currently confiscating cubed cheese from Rosie, and apologising to the Guild members who had been rather hoping to have ice cubes in their drinks instead.

"Thank the heavens we were not victim to that dairy disaster."

Susie sipped her glass of juice appreciatively, grateful that it was not filled with cheese, and nodded in response to Caroline's remark. The two were sat further to the edge of the Guild Summer Ceilidh which Eileen had offered in order to show off to Hole that Clatterford Women's Guild embraced culture from everywhere in the British Isles. Personally, Susie agreed with Tip, who had suggested that a pint of Guinness at the pub would be simple enough and represented Irish culture perfectly. The Chairwoman had been less than enthusiastic though, and so had gathered her troops to provide drinks and snacks. She had even managed to get Spike to agree to play some Gaelic music with some of his hippie friends, and Tash was happily springing about in the middle of the field to the beats of the violins and drums and whistles.

It was a warm and balmy afternoon, and it seemed like everybody was having some level of fun in the sun. Pictures were being taken for the website, though most of the Guild doubted how soon they would actually be uploaded, what with Eileen's known technological ineptness, and Kate's fierce overprotectiveness of the computer. Sal and Tip were giggling over their juice (though Susie suspected that Tip had slipped something alcoholic in it from her hip flask) and Eileen was fussing over everyone in sight, her medals clanking furiously and blinding anyone unfortunate enough to be looking in her direction whenever they caught the sunlight and reflected it in all directions. Caroline leaned back slightly next to Susie.

"Eileen looks like a walking beacon. Good job the horses are not here, it would spook the daylight out of them, you know," she commented idly, and Susie murmured her agreement because Caroline was always right regarding all matters equine. Susie didn't even really like horses very much, she just went along to the gymkhanas and pony club shows and treks because Caroline asked her to, and, for Susie, one of the best feelings was the fact that Caroline put her first when she wanted a companion. Plain old Susie was who Caroline wanted. And Susie definitely wanted Caroline, not that she would ever let on in public. Her deep rooted fondness of Caroline was something which Susie had kept to herself for a long, long time.

The afternoon wore on, and the music got jazzier, and the guild members got drunker (well, Sal and Tip did) and soon, most of them were dancing in the middle of the field, laughing and swaying and bobbing along to the beats. Susie and Caroline remained in their corner, trying to remain as invisible as possible to Eileen and Rosie, who was cheering madly and clapping along to the violins as if she were at a concert for the band Caroline's son Mikey was in. Caroline sighed.

"Goodness, it is rather stifling, this heat, isn't it?" Susie agreed, and turned to see Caroline lifting her hooded jumper which she had been wearing over her head, meaning that Susie caught a glimpse of her stomach, and so turned away quickly. Susie sat next to Caroline, unsure whether it was the heat of the sun or the proximity between them which was making her feel rather light headed. Caroline nodded towards the dancing guild members.

"Honestly, one would never catch myself up there doing that sort of thing. I save my recklessness for in my own home. Which reminds me, have I told you about how John and I made the decision to get more hip action with one another?" Susie spluttered at the comment, she never failed to be surprised by Caroline's inadvertent and totally accidental yet wildly inappropriate innuendos.

"Oh, really? More hip action?" Susie tried to coax the actual activity which Caroline was referring to from her.

"Oh yes, it is such a good method of fitness, and I am so comfortable with my ring now it is so well used as of recently. On a good day we manage up to forty minutes of it. You should call round one weekend when John is away and indulge me in it, I find it so pleasurable." Susie felt her face flushing at the words, and began wondering if Caroline was actually referring to the thing Susie thought she was, and wasn't making some sort of accidental faux pas with her wording. She was about to respond when their chat was interrupted by Eileen appearing before them.

"Oh Caroline! Susie! Come on dears, it doesn't do to sit around chitter-chattering when the Guild has a ceilidh at hand! Join us for the gay gordons, won't you?" Caroline muttered something under her breath which Susie didn't quite hear, then she rose to her feet, Susie following, where they both stood near to Queenie and Pauline before placing their arms in front of them and skipping around on the grass to the music, whilst more photographs were taken for the website and notice board. Susie scoffed to herself internally. Trust the only dance she did at the entire event to be the gay gordons. How very fitting to how she felt about the woman she had spent the majority of the event chatting with.

The telephone rang and Susie picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Susie. Now, John has gone away for the weekend, long conference in Germany. So would you like to pop round for a few hours, indulge me in some hip action? You did seem enthused by the idea at the ghastly ceilidh last weekend." Caroline spoke evenly down the phone, and Susie coughed at the memory of the conversation. She agreed, curious as to what her visit could lead to, and made her way over to Caroline's house.

Upon her arrival, Caroline answered the door wearing some leggings and a loose fitted t shirt which suited her figure immensely, in Susie's opinion. Caroline invited her in and through to one of the reception rooms of her large house, where everything became immensely clear to Susie very quickly.

"Oh! Hula hoops!" She exclaimed, gesturing to the two red and yellow plastic circles propped up against the wall. Caroline looked perplexed.

"Why of course. What else would it have been?"

"Well, erm, when you said hip action I got a little confused, since it is means, well, erm, sexual intercourse, I think, sometimes." Susie looked away very quickly.

"You agreed to come around and…" Caroline'e voice trailed off quickly, and she selected the red hoop from against the wall, leaving Susie to use the yellow. Standing towards the centre of the room, Caroline spun the hoop and began shaking her hips to the rhythm, keeping the hoop spinning around her waist at a constant pace. Susie, having not used a hula hoop since she was a girl, picked it up and immediately it clattered to the floor. Caroline raised her eyebrows from where she was still keeping her hoop up, and watched as Susie, after a few more attempts, got the hang of it and managed to twirl her hoop a lot more efficiently also.

They continued for a good while in silence, until Caroline decided that the fitness session was over, and invited Susie to have a drink with her in the kitchen. Between sips, Caroline looked at Susie.

"You know earlier, when you mentioned the meaning of hip action?"

"Yes." Susie felt her pulse quicken.

"Are you sure that is the meaning?"

"I think so, yes."

"Did you think that is what I was referring to?"

"Well, I thought perhaps yes, but then you invited me to do some, so I doubted it, given that…" Susie trailed off, unsure how to finish her sentence.

"You thought what? That I would not partake in such a thing with a woman?" Caroline raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I thought maybe not." Susie couldn't help the sigh which escaped. Caroline smiled.

"I wouldn't be averse to the idea, as long as the situation was appropriate." Susie immediately began thinking of every inappropriate situation linked to the comment as Caroline continued, "but of course, Susie, you would need to be entirely comfortable with it." Susie's jaw dropped at Caroline gave her the bluntest and most obvious hint she could ever have imagined.

"Caroline…" She leaned forwards against the table as an almighty crash from the hallway ruined their moment.

"Mum!" Freya's voice could be heard from the hallway, "could you not leave your childish toys lying around for me to trip over please?" Caroline rose to her feet sharply.

"Apologises, darling, but why are you not with the horses? They need a thorough exercising you do realise. Susie was just leaving anyhow after our fitness session. See you at the Guild meeting, Susie." Caroline let Susie out of the house rather sharply, and Susie got the feeling that she was panicked at being disturbed. However, Susie found herself replaying the conversation repeatedly in her mind all evening.

As she lay in bed that night, Susie couldn't help but smile. Maybe next time Caroline invited her over for some hip action, the outcome would be slightly different. She would remember to put on her floral perfume before going, just in case.

-finite-

(a/n – Leave me alone, I needed to see them both hula hooping together. I know you do to, everyone needs these two hula hooping together. Purely for the accidental Caroline innuendo. Please review, favourite etc guys, it means a lot.)