As devastated as we all are about Cory and now Finn, I feel that we need the promised ENDGAME for Finchel. So here is what I think the majority of Season 4 and should have looked like.
This fic starts with the end of the Glease episode. I know that as a Finchel fan their separation bothered me, but I also feel that Finn needed "other experiences" to prove to himself that Rachel is it. So forgive me for introducing a new girl for Finn at the beginning, but don't fret cause it will be only in the first chapter (with no smut for them) and the rest implied, but not shown. There will be Finchel interaction often (which is where the writers went wrong with S4 imo) we all know they are endgame, right? I promise you that the new person is temporary and her purpose is two-fold. One, is that it re-inforces to Finn that Rachel is really it, and two she is responsible in unleashing "crazy" Rachel from season 1.
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee, or Rachel or Finn (although I do wish he were mine and in my world Finn Hudson will live until he is 100). The song mentioned is Michael Jackson's She's Out Of My Life and at the end is featured one of my all time favorites Fiona Apple's Slow Like Honey
Here Without You
Finn is in his car driving home after leaving McKinley. As proud as he is of the musical and the Glee kids, he can't help but feel devastated by Rachel's visit and the end result of their conversation. He's partially blinded by the pooling of unshed tears in his eyes as he tightly grips the steering wheel.
"Oh, it's about HIM," he thinks back to their hallway conversation when she said she wasn't crying about Finn.
"You don't know that," she replied.
"I know YOU," Finn said and remembers the stuff he tells her about her different types of crying.
He can't believe he told her that he wanted no contact. But even though not speaking to her and not seeing will hurt, it feels right...they haven't had any contact since the auditorium break up anyway. When he sees her all he does is imagine of the things that he and Rachel did in bed together, things she is now doing with Brody.
He slams his fist on the steering wheel and screams, "FUCK! Why did she have to come back today?" The illusion that she was waiting for him to straighten himself out was a more attractive option, rather than know for sure she moved on. He knows one thing though. These will be the LAST tears he will cry over Rachel Berry and their break up, he tells himself. She is, obviously, not wasting any tears on him.
He sees the new hotel, The Stanford Arms, that opened recently up ahead with its new restaurant/bar. Even though he is not a drinker, this angry AND sad combination of feelings is a lot to manage; he really needs a beer right now. He pulls into the parking lot, parks and walks toward the entrance. One of the advantages of his almost 6'4" height is that people assume he is older than he is, and since he is wearing a tie today, maybe he'll fool the bartender into serving him a beer even though in reality he is only 19 yrs. old. The bar is called The Library, and he kinda loves that and chuckles. He can totally picture the local college students telling their parents they spent all evening at the library! Their parents would be so proud for them studying so hard!
The bar is more like a restaurant but it is darker and quieter than he expected. The music is not too loud and not too quiet. It is, he realizes, the perfect place to ignore others, or engage in conversation, whichever mood exists. There were only about ten people there. That is not a good thing; it will make him stick out more. All around, the walls were of wood paneling and it really reminded him of a library in some old, fancy, slightly creepy mansion. The walls were mainly made out of shelves holding what he imagines would be hundreds of books. He has this urge to go and see if the books are real. Maybe later he'll find out. First things, first! His target, the bar, was straight in front of him. He liked this place! It was classy, but not snooty. He wishes Puck were here. " Finn Hudson," he whispers to himself, "Stand up straight and go get your brew." He takes a deep breath and blows it out slowly. He squares his shoulders and walks up to he bar and sits.
The bartender approaches him; she is an older woman with smiling eyes. "A Blue Moon with an orange slice, please," he orders. He is surprised when she barely glances at him and says, "Coming right up!" While he waits he loosens up his tie, pops the top button of his shirt and sees the lady sitting on his right, two barstools away. Long hair has fallen forward and is hiding her most of her face. It looks like she has propped her chin on her hand and is bored.
Finn takes just a few sips and thinks, "This is the best damn beer I have ever had!" The lady (who turns out to be a hot, young woman by the way) looks at him and says, "I'm glad you are enjoying it!" Holy crap! Did he say that out loud? "Sorry! Sometimes my mouth says things my brain is not ready to share," he says and she smiles and laughs a little. "That must get you in A LOT of trouble!" remarks the girl with a laugh. He nods his head with a laugh and they both look back down at their drinks. The dark "Rachel" cloud descends upon him and he is starting to get really sad (pissed) again. He looks around to really look at the bar. He sees a small stage, and a small dance floor. There is a really nice piano at the back end of the dance floor, but no one is sitting there. As he turns to his right again, he realizes the girl has moved to the empty bar stool right next to him . As before, she has her right elbow on the bar and has her chin propped except now she is really studying him. She takes in the kind of messy brown hair, the cute smile, the light brown eyes and cute freckles, and she smiles at him.
"So...why the long face?" she asks. He looks at her closely for the first time. She looks to be in her early twenties. She has really straight, brown, really shiny hair, parted in the middle that goes all they way to her butt, and green eyes. She reminds him of the actress in the Romeo and Juliet movie they forced him to watch (but he still fell asleep) in English class. But her most striking feature is her mouth. She has really flirty lips, you know, the kind that playfully twitch when she speaks. She is smiling at him and her smile is starting to falter because he is taking too long to respond. "I mean, it is a gorgeous face, but it is really sad, too!"
"Uhm, well...you know...I just... Really? You think I'm gorgeous?" he responds a little shocked smile.
She cuts him off then with a laugh. "Mmm, cut the act; you know you're cute!" After a pause she says, "I bet it's a girl problem, right?" she says.
"How did you know?" Finn asks. She looks a him sadly and says, "I am suffering from the same disease." She takes in his raised eyebrows and says, "No...I mean...boy problems for me, girl problems for you!" He is relieved and he doesn't even know why. They laugh and begin to talk. She is so incredibly easy to talk to and she almost falls off of her barstool from laughter when he tells her about the rifle shooting incident in the Army. It amazes him that some people think it's funny; it was super, super painful...he still has a major scar. He quietly tells her that secretly he thinks the scar is kind of cool because it makes him look kind of dangerous. He slowly bares his soul to her about Rachel and she bares hers to him about Kevin. At some point a slow song comes on and she looks at him.
"I love this song. Dance with me?" She asks tentatively.
God! He really hates to dance, but he doesn't want to turn her down. So he looks at her and says, "Yes, but first I will have to get you to sign a liability waiver. I've been known to cause permanent damage to women's feet, and fast dancing has resulted in broken noses." She laughs and says, "I don't care about my feet, but in that case, I will take off my shoes and dance with you barefoot."
"Wow! You love your shoes more than your feet?" he asks.
"Of course, what girl doesn't?" she teases and taps him lightly on the nose with her index finger. "Now let's go mangle my feet, damn it!"
She takes his hand and leads him to the small dance floor. That's when he notices that she is almost as tall as him, probably 6 ft. tall in her bare feet.
"Were you a basketball player in school?" he asks her as they are walking toward the dance floor.
"I couldn't be that predictable, so no. I played volleyball." she smirks. She seems really confident, but there is also and underlying hint of insecurity that he finds kinda cute.
They reach the dance floor and she links her arms behind his neck and he finds his hands trembling a little when he reaches out to place them on her back. He is kind of nervous cause were she Rachel, he'd place his hands low on her back near her butt. But this is a stranger so he keeps his arms up higher, just under her shoulder blades. They are swaying and it is ok and he relaxes. The current song ends and immediately flows into a familiar tune. He hears the song and wants the ground to just open up and swallow him, but he continues to sway with her anyway. And surprisingly, it isn't awkward at all. She places the tips of her fingers just under the collar of his shirt at the back of his neck and barely moves them back and forth lightly. He tries to block out he lyrics. No such luck.
She's out of my life, she's out of my life
And I don't know whether to laugh or cry
I don't know whether to live or die
And it cuts like a knife
She's out of my life
At this point she realizes that the lyrics are affecting him, cause his breathing has become erratic, so she presses up against him to let him know she's here for him, and he just holds her tightly and buries his face in her hair. After a while he calms and starts to notice the smell of her perfume and feels the contours of her body pressed against him he gets a familiar stirring in his abdomen. It's been so fucking (or lack of fucking) long! He thought it would be weird being like this with another girl, and it is, sort of weird but not as weird as he thought it would be. It also feels good. Before the song is over they return to the bar.
Next thing Finn knows it is 1:00 AM. He is buzzed at this point, but not falling down drunk or anything. The bartender calls for the last call, and he pays the bill. "Hey," she looks at him nervously, "I have a room upstairs. Do you want to come and sober up in my room? I don't think you are ready to drive yet." She is noticing his hesitation, "Or you could take a cab, whichever makes you most comfortable. I won't rape you or anything, I promise," she teases.
Finn is floored. "But you don't even know my name!" He realizes they never exchanged names. "I don't need to know your name," she says as she locks her eyes on him, puts her hand on his shoulder, and painstakingly slowly and without breaking eye contact drags it down his arm to his hand. She gives his hand a squeeze. He looks at her hand holding his and it seems so foreign to him, and even though his mind is still considering her offer, his feet follow hers anyway. This is when he realizes she is wearing really tight, flare jeans that accenuate her rear end, and a really silky shirt that is beige and blends with her skin. He realizes that for the first time since he met Rachel Berry, his heart is beating really fast in the presence of another girl. She walks behind the front desk at the lobby, whispers something to the clerk there and he hands her a magnetic key card with a smirk. She pops the clerk on the shoulder playfully and says "Shut up," and walks around to grab Finn's hand again.
"Do you work here?" he asks her.
"Kind of," she replies. He stops at that moment and looks at her and stops in his tracks.
"Oh God, you're not a hooker, are you?" He blurts out. She laughs really loud and says, "Your mouth really does say things your brain doesn't want to share. And no, I'm not a hooker. I just know the clerk really well."
They enter the hotel room together and he sits on the king size bed. "Do you want a drink?" she asks. "Just some water," he croaks. He is suddenly parched and it feels like his heart pounding. Do 19 yr. olds have heart attacks? He feels excited and really scared at the same time. What if she turns out to be a serial killer or something? But he is in a fancy hotel and not some creepy house basement, so he figures he is safe. She goes to the small fridge and gets out a bottle of water and takes it back to him. He notices she is being really flirty when she hands it to him, and doesn't let it go right away, so they kind of play tug-of-war with it a for a split second before she lets him have it. She sits next to him on the bed with a smile and a look like she is unsure of her next move.
What she does next stuns him speechless. She says,"I have been wanting to kiss your lips since you walked in the bar." She slowly moves toward him and he looks at her lips, and she leans forward and kisses him. All he is thinking about at first is older women are really bold and then, Puck is right. Part of him wants to push her away, but then he thinks of Rachel and the thing he loves the most that she does to him in bed, and that she is doing it to someone else, probably right now. Fuck it! He knows he shouldn't but his heart keeps pounding and her hand moves to his collarbone and slides down over his chest and abdomen, and it feels so damn good to have someone touch him like that again, to feel wanted, that he gets lost in the kiss. His hand drifts dangerously close to her rear end.
"It should be illegal for someone to be hot and adorable at the same time." She continues to alternate between looking at this eyes and his lips for a few seconds. "You know what can help someone to start getting over their ex? Someone new, but strictly temporary; a rebound," she asks and replies herself.
"How temporary, and why me?" he asks.
"The No-Name kind of temporary and because there is something about your that is..." she sucks in her breath and let's it out in a soft hiss, "irresistible."
"But we gotta call each other something," he says almost in a trance. She stands in front of him while he is still sitting on the bed and says, "We don't need to call each other anything. All we need to know is you are I are both brokenhearted." She puts her hands on his knees, pulls them farther apart to stand between his legs; his eye level is right at her breasts and he can't take his eyes off of them. She seems cool and calm, but the rapid rise and fall of her chest betrays her. She pulls her shirt over her head (and wow, she is not wearing a bra), grabs him by knot of his tie, puts her knee on the bed between his legs lightly grazing his crotch, and slowly pushes him onto the mattress. She leans forward and Finn thinks that this is probably a really bad idea. Then he thinks about Rachel and Brody and what they are probably doing in NY and he thinks it is a damn good idea. He is empowered by how much this girl wants him, and he sinks his left hand in her hair and wraps it around his fist while he props himself on his right elbow. She gives him a very lustful smile. Her lips are just barely touching his when she whispers, "We can be each other's super glue for tonight!"
His head is pounding...dull, deep pain. He opens his eyes and panics for a split second unsure of where he is. The room is empty. He lifts the sheet and looks down at his nakedness. He remembers everything! All of it! All of her! Wild sex with a stranger felt so, so, so... he doesn't have a word for it; different but good. He is glad she is gone because it would be really awkward this morning. His eyes fall on a piece of stationery on the night stand. He reaches for it and reads the note she left. It has an ornate OS design at the top.
Dear Brokenhearted,
I hope you don't have any regrets about last night, but I left early just in case you do. I don't have any regrets, only gratitude, since I had a fantastic night with you. You are wonderful, and not just in the sack ;). Thank you for being a comfort to me, and I hope I was of some comfort to you. Break ups suck, but you WILL be ok.
Fondly,
Super-Glue
Finn smiles his trademark smirk and quickly showers and gets dressed. He thinks about last night and he doesn't regret anything; they were careful and protected themselves. The most important thing is that he really thought he would feel guilty, feel some sort of betrayal. Although there is a little of that, it doesn't come close to the betrayal he feels about Rachel with Brody. He is not interested in going out and looking for someone to date, but if he does meet someone, he knows he can date again.
He walks to his car and sees the bartender from last night walking by.
"Doing the walk of shame, I see!" she exclaims. He looks at his clothes from last night slightly wrinkled and and looks at her and proudly and says, "Yep!"
He runs to he car with a smile he didn't think was possible yesterday.
A few weeks later-Thanksgiving!
Rachel is excited and a little apprehensive about being in Lima for Thanksgiving. Especially since Brody kind of invited himself along for the trip; his family is too far away to make a weekend trip feasible. She really thinks she'll have to avoid Finn now. The hope of running into him to sort of patch things up, and begin being friends again, is going down the drain; she hates not being able to talk to him. There exists a physical need to know what is going on in his life, and Kurt is not forthcoming, per Finn's instructions. It's perfectly understandable that he would not want to hear about her, especially her and Brody, but why would he instruct Kurt not to mention anything about Finn to Rachel? Is he is trying to punish her?
It's Thanksgiving and Finn is stuffed! He probably has had 3 helpings between 3pm and 7 pm. His excitement now is because he is joining some of the former glee club members who graduated at his favorite new restaurant/bar, The Library for karaoke. It's become his new hangout, and the nice bartender lady always assumes he is old enough and doesn't check for ID. Even so, underage people are allowed until 10:00 pm when it officially becomes a bar and underage folks are kicked out. He is meeting Puck and Mercedes, who are visiting from LA, Quinn from Yale, Mike from Chicago, and yes, even Santana from Louisville. Kurt is also coming with him, and he is so happy to see him again.
The gang meets up at The Library at 8:00 and proceeds to order their non-alcohol drinks. They each take turns singing and the evening is off to a great start. He and Puck decide to sing The Beatles I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends.
"We are going out for a bit, Daddy!" Rachel calls out as she is about to head out of the door with Brody.
"Ok, stay out as long as you want!" her daddy yells out and Rachel gives him a frown face.
It's official! Her dads hate Brody. What is it with this guy that makes men hate him so?
"Maybe we can get a hotel room or something...I feel really uncomfortable AND they won't let me stay in the room with you," whines Brody.
"That's just the way they are, they wouldn't let Finn spend the night in my room either," she replies. Until we got engaged, she thinks to herself.
She tried calling some of the glee club members that were visiting home for the holiday, but every one of them was busy, so they decide to drive around. If she didn't know better she would think they were trying to avoid her. They are not choosing sides, are they? No, that's silly, she thinks to herself.
As they drive, she notices the new restaurant/bar in town. She asks Brody to pull in there and park.
"Let's go see what it's like!" she exclaims excitedly.
As she walks in, she hears someone singing...it's Puck! Her blood freezes as the entire Glee group, turns to stare at her and Brody. Why didn't they invite her?
Rachel makes eye contact with Santana. "Oh, this night may not be a total bore after all!" raves Santana excitedly. She missed all the drama at college.
Rachel is contemplating leaving, but that would make her look like a coward, so lifts up her head, tosses some of her hair behind her back, and she walks in holding Brody's hand. She takes a table near the glee group and sits down while Brody goes to get their drinks. It isn't until after she sits, that she hears the other voice singing with Puck. Oh God, she thinks to herself as Finn spies her and falters his lyrics a little bit, but recovers quickly. He does his utmost NOT to look at her. Holy crap, he thinks to himself.
What do I do when my love is away?
Does it worry you to be alone?
How do I feel at the end of the day?
Are you sad because you're on your own?
No, I get by with a little help from my friends
Mmm I get high with a little help from my friends
Mmm I'm going to try with a little help from my friends
Do you need anybody?
I need somebody to love
Could it be anybody?
I want somebody to love
"Holy Shit!" says Brody when he brings back the drinks.
"Let's just finish our drinks and then make a quick exit, ok?" Rachel whispers to him.
Finn finishes his duet with Puck and they return to their table. Kurt decides to go up to Rachel's table.
"Hi, guys!" he says.
Rachel looks as him and gets up and whispers, "So all you guys planned to meet here and left me out? Thanks, Kurt!"
Kurt looks guilty, but replies, "Well, you can see why. Finn is with us and he planned this and invited these people. I couldn't very well invite you to come here with playboy in tow, now could I? Look, just make the best of the situation, ok?" Kurt then returns to the table where Finn is sitting. Sorry Rachel, Finn is family he thinks to himself. Rachel thinks back to sophomore year and has feelings of deja vu'. Finn is Mr. Popularity, and she is the outcast; have they come full circle again?
The rest of the Glee friends are constantly doing the ping pong glances between Finn and Rachel, while both Finn and Rachel pretend the other is not in the room. There is a no contact clause in effect, after all. It is the most awkward thing that Finn has ever experienced and that says a lot, cause he has been in some awkward situations.
Puck leans over and whispers, "Hey dude, do you want us to leave?"
"Nope!" replies Finn. "I'm fine, if she is uncomfortable, she should leave!"
Just then, the karaoke guy makes an announcement.
"Folks, we have a treat for you tonight! The hotel owner's daughter is here checking up on us, and being the talented performer that she is, she will play a song for you all tonight as a thank you for coming out and leaving your loved ones on this momentous holiday to join us here this evening! Please welcome, Olivia Stanford!"
Everyone starts clapping and Finn is glad that there will be a distraction for all of them.
The lady walks to the piano that sits at the back of the dance floor, facing the tables, and Finn's heart drops to his toes. It's the girl from a few weeks back that he had the one night stand with. He gasps and everyone at the table turns and looks at him. He hasn't told anyone about her. He assumed she was driving though and that he would never see her again! She is the owner's daughter and he asked her if she was a hooker? What is wrong with him?
"You ok, there?" Quinn asks, and he quickly nods his head.
"Ok, now we are talking...I'll be hitting that later!" Santana says.
"She doesn't play for your team," Finn states.
"And how would you know?" Santana eyes him.
Finn looks back the the piano and says, "I just know, ok?"
There is a microphone at the piano and the girl (Olivia, now he knows her name) leans over and says, "This song is for all those who are brokenhearted. Just know that superglue is always available to mend that broken heart."
She begins to play a very soulful song and locks her gaze on Finn...her voice is deep and sultry.
You moved like honey
In my dreams last night
Yeah, some old fires
Were burning
You came near to me
And you endeared to me
But you couldn't
quite discern me
She is staring right at Finn, and Rachel just doesn't know what that is all about. This girl is incredibly sexy, and she is acting like she is singing to Finn. What gives this girl the right to be that bold? She looks over that the other table and everyone is looking between the girl and Finn. But Finn? Finn is staring right at her and not moving like a deer caught in headlights. Rachel's heart is beating faster and she can actually hear the blood pumping in her ears. Oh, God! She is getting the feeling that something is going on between them.
While singing, Olivia, signals for the karaoke guy to take over the piano and she takes the microphone and starts walking slowly toward Finn. She is like a lioness about to pounce! She continues singing...
Does that scare you?
I'll let you run away
But your heart
Will not oblige you
You'll remember me
Like a melody
Yeah, I'll haunt the
World inside you
As she sings she slowly goes up to Finn, straddles his lap and continues singing to him. Finn, oblivious to the looks of shock on EVERYONE'S face, stares at the girl's face, mesmerized. Rachel can't take her eyes off the singer and Finn, and her eyes are quickly pooling with tears. She hates herself right now because she knows what Finn felt like when she and Brody were singing that duet at Callbacks and later in that hallway after Grease...it's the most awful, awful kind of pain. She presses her lips together to stop herself from crying. Keep it together, keep it together, she chants to herself.
The girl gets up as she continues singing and walks behind Finn's chair and Finn is still frozen looking forward.
And you'll yield to me
Like a scent in the breeze
And you'll wonder
What it is about me
It's my big secret
Keeping you coming
Slow like honey
And heavy with mood
As she finishes the last few lines of the song, she buries her left hand in the hair at the top of Finn's head, bends right over him, tilts his head back so he has to look at her or the ceiling, and when she finishes the song, kisses him softly on the lips while their heads are upside down.
Rachel scoffs, "It's apparent she stole that move from the Spiderman movie!"
"Holy shit!" Puck let's out a deep groan. "Hey, sweetie, me next!" He yells out.
Olivia glances at Puck, gives him a glorious smile and says, "No, thank you!"
She releases Finn's head, puts the microphone on Finn's table and walks out of the bar. It takes a split second for Finn to regain his composure, and he jumps up to follow after her.
Rachel stomps over to Kurt.
"What the hell was that?" she asks.
Kurt gives her a surprised smirk and says, "It would appear they've met before."
Santana starts fanning herself and yells, "Whoo, we've got panty ignition! How come Lumps gets all the hot girls?"
"Did you know anything about this, Kurt?" Rachel's voice is low and her eyes are down cast. Kurt only shakes his head no. It just now dawns on him that by being with Rachel in New York, he kind of has lost the brother bond with Finn. It makes him very, very sad. He is going to have to fix that!
Rachel takes a deep breath, lets it out slowly while shaking her head sideways a few times thinking how unbelievable all this is and walks out, Brody trailing behind her. Oops, she had forgotten he was there!
Finn catches up with Olivia in the lobby. "Hey, wait up a minute!"
She slows down her pace, stops, and turns around with a smile on her face.
"That was quite the performance," says Finn a little shyly.
She tilts her head on one side and lifts one shoulder at him in a flirty way and says, "You deserved it." She walks a little closer to him and looks at him deeply in the eyes. " You know, I have thought of you often since that night."
Finn remains silent, but smiles. He hasn't really thought of her very much at all, but that may be because he thought she was gone for good.
"So, do you...like... stay here all the time?" he asks her.
"I have a permanent room here, not the one we used, but I come and go. You know I come to "spy" on the staff for my dad." She laughs.
"Well, since I now know YOUR name, it's only fair that I let you know of mine." He sticks his hand out to be shaken. "I'm Finn. Finn Hudson." She takes his hand, leans forward and kisses his cheek. She lets go of his hand by slowly dragging her nails across his palm and fingers, turns and walks away. "See you around, Finn Hudson," she calls out behind her. Her nails on his palms gave him goosebumps, and he turns to go back and join his friends.
As he turns around with a wide smile on his face, he sees Rachel leaving with Brody walking behind her. She stops when she sees his smile and her eyes are sad. His smile disappears and they stare at each other each daring the other to look away first. Rachel loses that dare. She looks down and walks away. As she walks to the parking lot she realizes Finn has already changed some. Three months ago he would have been the one ashamed enough to look away first.
