"Come on, Gail. Let me take you home." Holly gently pulls Gail to her feet and leads her toward the exit. Gail looks at Steve and Chris: "Text me if there's any news, yah?" Steve nods his head. "Of course. Get some rest, ok?"
Gail follows Holly without resistance. She is so tired and so emotionally drained she can barely function. "Here we go." Holly opens the passenger side of her car and waits for Gail to get in. "Wait, where are we going?" Gail is confused. "I'm taking you home." Holly reminds her. All Gail can muster is a feeble, "Oh." She gets into the car and puts on the seatbelt. Once Holly is in and starts the engine, Gail says: "I don't want to go home."
"OK. ... Where do you want to go?"
"I don't know. Not home. I just -... I don't know... I don't want to be alone, y'know?" Gail doesn't look at Holly as she says this. She hangs her head and stares at her hands, then out the window.
"Ok" Holly says slowly, considering what she should or should not suggest at this juncture.
"I'm sorry. Am I being a pain in the ass?" Gail asks.
"No. No! Do you want to... I mean, I could hang out with you for a while, til Chris gets back or ... I don't know..." Holly takes a deep breath. "We could go to my place...?" The question hangs in the frigid late night air while Gail's brain processes the offer.
"OK" is all she says.
"OK, then." Holly puts the car in drive and turns left out of the Hospital parking lot on the way to her condo. They ride in silence, Gail staring blankly out the window. Holly tries to look at her discretely whenever they come to a stop. She wants to get a sense of how Gail is holding up, but doesn't want to get caught doing it.
She looks like a different person, Holly realizes. Gone is the confident, brash, full of herself cop from this afternoon. The hours waiting at the hospital, going crazy with worry and guilt and trying not to cry have left Gail looking fragile and depleted.
"Here we are." Holly states as she steers her car into the parking lot of her building. Gail nods her head but doesn't move when Holly stops the car and turns off the engine.
"Gail? Are you ok? Did you change your mind?"
"What? No. Sorry. " She releases her seatbelt. "This is really nice of you, Holly. Thank you. "
Holly smiles. "It's ok. Really."
Gail stands with her hands in the pockets of her jacket, unsure of what she should do. She looks around Holly's condo and tries to assess what she can learn from the decor. But her brain is too fried. She can only think about how tired she is, emotionally and physically. Every time she starts to think about what all has happened that day, from Chloe being shot, to coming under fire herself, to kissing Holly, to Oliver being abducted, to Sam - - her throat tightens, and her breathing becomes shallow. She squeezes her eyes shut and wills herself to be calm.
Holly re-enters the living room carrying towels and pajamas. "It's ok to take off your coat, y'know. I turned up the heat. It'll be warm in here very soon." Gail doesn't respond, she lifts her head and just absently stares in Holly's direction. "Gail, seriously? Are you okay?"
Gail nods her head, focuses her eyes and offers Holly a weak smile. "Well," she says removing her jacket, " … I'm kind of a mess."
"It's ok." Holly reassures her. "You've earned it. Here, do you want to change?" She takes Gail's coat, hands her a makeshift set of pajamas and points to the hallway. "The bathroom is on the left. Can I make you a cup of tea, or something?"
"Or Something, sounds good. Do you have any whisky?"
"I do," says Holly, "but you're not getting any of it." Gail gives her a puzzled look. "Contrary to popular belief, alcohol does not help you sleep. It actually disrupts normal sleep patterns and can -"
Gail cuts her off. "Really? C'mon Holl ..."
Holly laughs, but Gail is serious. "I want to go home," she says petulantly.
"Too bad. You're here now, and you're stuck with me. Go take a shower," Holly gently pushes Gail towards the bathroom. "Do you like milk with your tea?"
"I like whisky with my tea." Gail says as she slowly shuffles down the hall. "Only without the tea."
"Duly noted." Holly nods her head, adjusts her glasses, and files this info away. It's not like she didn't already know Gail was a big drinker, now she sees Gail probably abuses alcohol. Not uncommon for a cop. Still, not a trait Holly is fond of. "What am I doing?" Holly wonders. "Why the hell have I let myself fall for a hard drinking, straight cop?" She sighs and puts the kettle on. "I have lost my mind."
"Feel better?" Holly asks as Gail approaches the couch. "Shall I pour you a cup of tea, or no?"
"Sure. Your shower is amazing."
"Really? Why is that?" Holly asks as she hands Gail a warm cup of Sleepytime chamomile tea.
"Well, we have zero water pressure at the apartment. I mean, you could spit on yourself harder than what you get out of our shower. It's pathetic. And your water is hot."
"Ah … so now are you glad again that you came here instead of going home?"
Gail offers up half of a smile and drinks her tea. "Yah."
"Well, you're talking in complete sentences again. So … that's a good sign. How's the tea? Do you like it?"
"No." Gail says plainly. But she keeps on sipping and steals a glance at Holly who is shaking her head and trying to stifle a laugh. "Holly?"
"Yes?"
There is a long pause while Gail tries to decide how to proceed. "Why are you so nice to me? I mean, I'm not a very nice person, so ... I don't deserve … this … you … I …" Tears start to bubble up from god knows where. Gail had not meant to get sentimental or emotional, she is just too exhausted to keep any defenses up. Gail puts down her tea cup and buries her face in her hands, sobbing.
"Hey," Holly shifts from her end of the sofa til she is next to Gail, pulling her close. She's been expecting this. She knows Gail tries to contain her emotions as much as possible, but today has been exceptional. On many levels. "Stop beating yourself up. I'm nice to you because I like you."
"I don't deserve you." Gail sobs.
"Well, you've got me, so …" Holly strokes Gail's hair and pats her back trying to calm her down. Finally she says, "C'mon. Let's get you to bed." Holly leads her to the bedroom and pulls down the covers. Gail has almost regained her composure and wipes away her tears with the back of her hand. "This is so embarrassing. I don't usually -"
"You don't have to apologize for being human. Here." Holly hands her a box of tissues. "Where did you leave your phone? You're going to want that, right?"
"In my jacket, I think."
Holly leaves to retrieve the phone and Gail is thankful she has the opportunity to blow her nose unselfconsciously. She sits perched on the edge of the bed and looks around Holly's bedroom. It is warm and comfortable and Gail feels oddly at ease there. She looks at a framed picture on the wall, obviously a family photo from years ago. Holly looks to be about 13, tall, lanky and super skinny. She looks awkward and self conscious, which Gail thinks is adorable since now Holly is the very embodiment of composure and self assurance and grace.
Holly returns, hands Gail her phone and commands her simply, "Lay down."
"Are you – ?" Gail looks up at Holly and awkwardly gesticulates towards the other side of the bed.
"I'm going to change and, then, yah - I'm going to -" Holly mimics Gail's hand movement and laughs as she heads for the bathroom, turning off the lights as she goes.
"Oh my god. What am I doing?" Gail wonders. She half considers grabbing her clothes and calling a cab, but she knows that is insane, so she slides under the covers and bunches up the pillow and rests her head, waiting for Holly to return.
Either Holly is purposefully taking a ridiculously long time in the bathroom or Gail really is exhausted beyond all telling. She checks her phone again for messages and thinks about checking her weather app, but she can't keep her eyes open and the warmth and softness of Holly's bed is making it impossible for Gail to stay awake.
When Holly returns Gail is already asleep. Just as she hoped. Holly takes Gail's phone out of her hand and places it on the bedside table then goes to the other side of the bed and as gently as possible gets in. She takes off her glasses and pulls the covers up to her neck as she tries to get comfortable. She looks at Gail. Holly spent so many nights convincing herself she and Gail would never be a thing that she can't quite believe what happened today. She resists the urge to curl up next to Gail and spoon her. But she does reach over and adjust the blankets so they cover her shoulders.
Gail rolls over, her eyes briefly flutter open then close again. "Holly?" she whispers.
"Yah, I'm here. You're ok. Go back to sleep."
"Mmmhmm" Gail mumbles as she yawns and stretches, arching her back like a cat and in the process moving closer to Holly. Much closer.
"Ohhhh … kay" Holly is not prepared for this. Gail has planted herself solidly beside Holly, curling up next to her as if they had slept together for years. Twice in a 24 hour period Gail Peck has surprised Holly in a way she never anticipated. Gail often catches Holly off guard with her unique perspective on life. But always Holly realizes whatever thing Gail has done to give her pause, well, it's odd, but the behavior is quintessential Gail. Irreverent, sometimes condescending, observant, unfiltered … and Holly knows how to handle that Gail.
Impetuous, affectionate, vulnerable, cuddly Gail – this is new.
The sound of a barking dog wakes Holly. She's confused because she has no idea where the sound is coming from. It doesn't seem quite real. Probably because it's not real. It's Gail's phone signalling her that she has received a text from Chris. Holly squints into the darkness and slowly registers what's happening. What's happening is, it's very early in the morning, and Gail Peck is in Holly's bed. Gail is not only in her bed, which is odd enough, but Gail is sound asleep on top of her. It all comes rushing back. Holly realizes she should look at the text to see if it's something important. Important enough that she might need to wake up Gail. Getting to the phone without waking Gail up will be a trick. But as Holly stretches her arm towards the bedside table Gail remains essentially comatose. Holly grabs the phone and tries holding it at varying distances trying to read it without her glasses. "Picku up 2 hrs. Wuts H 's adddress?"
Holly considers her options and decides to just text Chris her address without any other comment but "Thx". She works on extracting herself from Gail and making her way to the kitchen. She plans on getting breakfast started, then waking Gail. After the coffee starts brewing and she's made the pancake batter she returns to the bedroom to find Gail still fast asleep.
Holly sits beside Gail and whispers in her ear. "Gail? C'mon sleepy-head, it's time to wake up." She gently squeezes Gail's shoulder. "Hey Sleeping Beauty … Do you want coffee?" Gail moans and buries her face in the pillow. "Go away." she mumbles. Holly laughs and shakes her a little more forcefully. "Good morning to you, too, Sunshine."
"Why are you torturing me?" Gail growls.
"Because Chris is going to be here in an hour and you need to get up. So do you want cream in your coffee, or sugar, or both or nothing? What? Tell me." Holly keeps on nudging Gail who keeps on trying to burrow deeper and deeper under the covers.
Gail relents and rolls over to look at Holly. "Oh," she sighs. "It's you." Gail rubs her eyes and smiles at Holly with a face so innocent and open she looks like a little child. "I like you." Holly is almost as flabbergasted by this sweet, sleepy version of Gail as she was at Gail kissing her in the interrogation room. She smiles back. "I like you, too. Now get out of my bed."
"Un unh." Gail says grabbing fistfuls of Holly's shirt and pulling her down for a kiss.
Every fiber of Holly's being wants to attack Gail and commence with mad hot monkey sex, but the part of Holly that is a responsible, intelligent adult knows this is not a good idea, for several reasons. She mentally outlines those reasons while physically trying to minimize the impact of Gail's insistent kissing. "THINK" Holly commands her brain, which immediately kicks into high gear: 1) Chris's arrival is imminent. 2) Gail is probably still effectively sleep deprived and thus may not be coherent and rational and consequently not able to voluntarily engage in consensual sex. 3) Holly herself is too freaked out by the entire chain of events over the past 24 hours to properly analyze the situation she now finds herself in. And so, Holly, while initially inclined to return the kiss with equal enthusiasm, begins to purposefully extract herself from Gail's clutches and commences to panic.
"Jesus, Gail" she pants. Holly adjusts her glasses. She knows her face must be beet red because she feels flushed and her heart is racing and her pulse is pounding and she really needs to get off that bed. Stat! Holly quickly stands up and tries to compose herself. She fails. She fidgets and shuffles and stutters and finally blurts out: "Cream or sugar? It's an easy question!" Then she walks out without waiting for Gail's reply.
"Just milk." Gail says. To nobody.
Gail peaks her head inside the kitchen and asks: "Is it safe to come in?"
Holly looks up from her coffee and blushes. "Yes. Sorry about that. I, uh … yah ..." she adjusts her glasses and bites her lower lip.
"Well, I'm awake now and probably safe to be around." Gail says matter of factly. "Mostly."
"I made pancakes." Holly gets up and moves to the stove. "Do you want some? Do you like pancakes? I never met anyone who didn't like pancakes. I mean, really? Who doesn't like pancakes? Right?"
"Calm down, Holl. I like pancakes." Gail is slightly bemused and maybe even a little annoyed at this new side of Holly. She doesn't know how to respond to Insecure Holly. This is new.
Holly takes a deep breath. "Sorry. I … Can I be honest?" She puts down the pancake batter and looks at Gail.
"Yes." Gail says it so slowly it's kind of obvious she isn't really sure 'yes' is what she wanted to say. Truth is she really doesn't want Holly to be honest right now. But she doesn't know how to get out of this situation without doing something offensive or insensitive or just plain stupid, and Holly doesn't deserve that. So she sucks it up and waits for Holly to continue.
"I like you. And I like kissing you. And maybe when … , I mean, like, when things get back to normal at 15, y'know … Maybe you'll still be interested in … the kissing … or something, … and … " Holly pushes her glasses out of the way so she can rub her eyes. She takes a deep breath. "I'm not being very articulate. I'm sorry."
"It's ok," Gail says moving towards her. "After you said 'I like kissing you' - I stopped listening."
This makes Holly laugh. "You are completely incorrigible!"
"I don't know what that is. Should I be offended?"
"No," says Holly.
"Ok then. I'm going to kiss you again."
Gail puts her hands on Holly's hips and pulls her close. She kisses her slowly and softly and she doesn't stop kissing Holly until her back pocket starts barking.
"Damn," she pulls away but doesn't let go of Holly. "Chris is here. Can I get a rain-check on the pancakes?"
"Anytime."
Gail moves to the living room to get her coat and heads for the door. She stops and turns to Holly before leaving. "Thanks again. Call you later?"
"Ok" Holly is fidgeting endlessly with her shirt.
Gail looks at her quizzically. "Are you going to be alright?"
"Yah." Holly says as she shakes her head 'no' and adjusts her posture and realizes that she has tried to sound nonchalant but has failed miserably.
"Shouldn't I be the one freaking out about this?" Gail asks.
"I Am Not Freaking Out!" Holly says a little too forcefully.
"Ok, except, you totally are." Gail smiles like she has won a huge prize. She has managed to topple Holly's very well maintained sense of equilibrium and control. And she likes it and Gail can't help pointing it out. "You're freaking out, Holly. You're freaking out and I'm not." She ponders that for a moment and adds: "Well, this is new."
Chris' car horn shatters the moment and Gail reaches for the doorknob and as she leaves shouts: "I'll call you later. Bye."
Holly stares at the spot Gail just vacated and says to no one. "This is new."
to be continued ...
