This is the ninth and final shinobi's guide. Oh stop crying you know it couldn't last forever. It's an election year in my country so I thought this would be an appropriate guide for the occasion…
The Shinobi's Guide to Politricks
By Kaori
"Genin of Konohagakure!" Tsunade announced. "It is my distinct privilege to announce that we will be reinstating the yearly elections for Genin of the Year!" An excited murmur went up amongst the crowd of people that had gathered outside the Hokage Tower. "Yes, that's right. We finally managed to get the crown unstuck from the top of the flagpole."
"How'd it get up there again?" Izumo asked his cohort.
"You remember," Kotetesu said. "Ibiki got mad because Genma won, stole the crown, and super glued it to the flagpole."
"As you all know, only genin can announce their candidacy, and the winner gets a voucher for a week of no D-Rank missions, including cat chasing, among other privileges." Tsunade continued. This got everybody's attention. Retrieving runaway pussy was the one D-Rank mission that every Konoha ninja has done at least thirty times. To be exempt from that for a week was a godsend. "Those of you who wish to run for Genin of the Year can officially announce your candidacy tomorrow. We'll hold the debate a month from now so you have four weeks to campaign. The voting will take place right after the debate is finished. Now, on to my other announcement, it has come to my attention that someone has been drinking my sake…" There was much nervous coughing amongst the jounin population.
Once everyone had been dismissed, the village genin immediately started discussing who would win.
"Naturally Sasuke-kun will be elected Genin of the Year." Sighed Ino, starry-eyed.
"What's so natural about that? If anyone is going to be Genin of the Year it'll be me." Boasted Kiba.
"Keep dreaming dog-boy." Snorted Sasuke. "Between you and the dobe I'll win by a landslide."
"I'm not running." Said Naruto, shocking the hell out of everyone. They thought since Sasuke was putting his name up for candidacy Naruto would too just for the chance to show the dark-haired boy up; and then there was the no cat-chasing thing.
"B…but, why not Naruto-kun?" Hinata's plans of being Naruto's campaign manager and thereby getting him to notice her were dashed to pieces. Naruto refused to answer.
"Well, if you're not running then you can help me with my campaign!" announced Kiba.
"No! Naruto's going to help Sasuke-kun." Sakura said adamantly. "As his teammate it's only right that he help Sasuke. Right Sasuke-kun?"
"Hmph, just so long as he doesn't screw up." Snorted Sasuke.
"Hey, I may not be running but there's no way I'm going to help the teme win!" protested Naruto.
"Ha!" said Kiba. "Naruto doesn't even want to help Sasuke, so he's free to help me win this thing!"
"I never said I would help you either Dog Breath."
"Eh? Why not?"
"It doesn't matter, I'll still win." Sasuke interrupted.
"That's what you think Uchiha. This election is mine! You may have the fangirl vote but nobody else likes you so I'll definitely win!"
"Actually, neither one of you has a prayer of being elected Genin of the Year." Said Neji.
"Oh? And why is that, Hyuuga?" Sasuke glared at the older genin.
"Because I'm going to win."
"IN YOUR DREAMS!" yelled Kiba and Sasuke, inciting a three-way squabble.
So the next day, the candidates for Genin of the Year were posted on a large bulletin board in the village square as follows:
Hyuuga Neji
Sadaharu Ran
Inuzuka Kiba
Asataka Yuki
Uchiha Sasuke
Wataro Ayame
Tsunade smirked at the list. She was certain that the other three candidates would drop out once they saw who they were up against. After all, relative unknowns couldn't hope to compete against three members of the most prominent clans in Konoha. She was a little upset that Naruto had decided not to run and that the Nara kid was exempt, but she was even more upset to find out that none of the girls from the Rookie Nine had decided to run. Upset but not surprised. TenTen didn't have time for that kind of this, Hinata was far too shy to run, and since Sasuke was running Ino and Sakura would be too busy fighting over who would be managing his campaign. Shino and Chouji not running wasn't surprising either. Shino wasn't the type to draw attention to himself and Chouji didn't really have much incentive to run. Still, Kiba, Neji, and Sasuke would certainly put on an interesting campaign.
"This is going to be interesting." She grinned. There was a knock at the door. "Enter." Izumo poked his head in.
"Hokage-sama, the piranhas you ordered are here." He said. Tsunade steepled her hands.
"Eeexcellent."
Next chapter we find that running for office in a ninja village is a little different than running in the normal political arena. Instead of fundraisers and the usual campaign speeches, there's…well you'll see.
Additional A/N: The updates for this story will be very fast. I'm going to try and update this story at least once a week so expect this story to be complete in at least nine weeks. This is a bittersweet thing for me. On the one hand it is the end of saga, on the other I have more time to work on Where the Hell Are We Now, on the other hand you guys are going to bombard me with emails demanding that I write another one…Mendokuse.
