FUTURAMA
Spec Script
"The Robot Games"
By
Robert Bevill
OPENING CREDITS
Caption: MAY THE FORCE BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR
EXT. PLANET EXPRESS HEADQUARTERS
Fade in.
INT. PLANET EXPRESS LIVING ROOM
Fry and Bender sit on the Planet Express couch watching TV. The "Zarbloxian Idol" logo is revealed.
NARRATOR
We now return to, "Zarbloxian Idol!"
A male, overweight green alien wearing a T-shirt that says, "Keep Calm and Overuse This Meme" is standing on stage, singing off-key into a microphone.
CONTESTANT
And IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOOOVE YOUUUUUUUUU!
Two judges sit behind a table, watching the singer: a female Zarbloxian, and a rectangular robot. Between them is Simon Cowell's head in a jar.
The Zarbloxian is holding her ears and groaning as the contestant sings. Simon Cowell is noticeably wincing. The robot remains stoic, but it has a screen on its chest which displays a green line in constant fluctuation.
ZARBLOXIAN JUDGE
Well, you certainly have a lot of... passion?
SIMON COWELL
I'm going to have to cut you off, there. Your singing, how do I put it, reminds me more of my mother-in-law after a few too many drinks than it does anyone with actual talent.
ROBOT JUDGE
(MONOTONE)
YOUR SINGING IS IN THE BOTTOM THREE POINT SIX PERCENT OF ALL SENTIENT LIFEFORMS. I DO NOT RECOMMEND FURTHER PURSUING A CAREER AS A SINGER. YOU ARE DISMISSED.
The contestant on stage breaks into tears and runs off crying.
Fry and Bender sit on the couch, laughing.
BENDER
Hahaha! Look at that idiot, thinking he can sing with the best of them.
LEELA
(Offscreen)
Bender!
Bender and Fry stop laughing and look at Leela, who is revealed to have been watching as well.
LEELA
I can't believe you two! That poor Zarbloxian was trying his best at something he loved, and he just had his dreams crushed on national television!
Bender leans back on the couch and puts his arms behind his head.
BENDER
Eh, put a sock in it, Leela. That moron knew what he was getting himself into when he signed up for the gig.
Professor Farnsworth walks into the room.
PROFESSOR FARNSWORTH
Good news, everyone! We have a delivery to make to the planet Pan-FM, a planet inhabited entirely by robots!
FRY
Hang on a minute, professor. This isn't one of those evil worlds where the robots try to kill humans on sight, is it?
PROFESSOR FARNSWORTH
Oh Fry, of course not! Don't worry, the population of Pan-FM is under strict control. There is absolutely no chance anyone in our crew will get hurt.
EXT. PLANET EXPRESS SHIP FLYING THROUGH SPACE
INT. PLANET EXPRESS COCKPIT
Leela sits in the captain's chair flying the ship. Fry and Bender sit behind her.
LEELA
I know that we're not supposed to question the contents of whatever delivery we make, but is anyone else concerned about the fact that we're transporting weapons?
A few boxes are seen filled with swords, knives, bows and arrows, and axes. The words "FOOD", "SUPPLIES", and "DRUGS" are crudely written on the side of the boxes.
FRY
You've got a point, Leela. Maybe we should just dump them somewhere and go back home.
BENDER
(gasp)
Fry, you would abandon an important delivery just like that?
FRY
Bender, you do it all the time.
BENDER
I do it because I'm lazy, not because I'm scared. Big difference!
EXT. PAN-FM
The Planet Express crew flies onto the surface of the planet from space.
EXT. DISTRICT 1100
The Planet Express ship lands on a landing pad on a brown, grey section of the planet. A sign reads, "DISTRICT 1100".
Leela, Fry, and Bender push the pallet with the weapon crates on it through the district. As they walk, they get a good view of the landscape. Robots wear tattered rags and look as though they are living in poverty. It is highly reminiscent of District 12 from "The Hunger Games."
LEELA
(whispering)
Look at all these poor robots. What do they need weapons for?
A robot painted bright pink with a pale face and a frilly pink hat meets them near a stage on the outskirts of the district. She resembles Effie Trinket.
ROBOT EFFIE
Oh good, you have our supplies! We were worried that we wouldn't get them in time for the next competition!
LEELA
Uh, right. Sign here, please.
Leela hands Robot Effie a clipboard with a sheet of paper on it, which she promptly signs.
LEELA
What are all these weapons for, anyway?
ROBOT EFFIE
Why, they're for Pan-FM's annual event, the Robot Games! Have you not heard of them?
BENDER
I have! But, uh, how about you give my friends here a refresher?
ROBOT EFFIE
Of course! They're the pride of all of Pan-FM! It's a competition of strength, speed, and wits to determine who is the most powerful robot of all!
FRY
Sounds like fun. You guys wanna watch it?
BENDER
Woo! Hell yeah!
Leela looks at her armband.
LEELA
Hm... well, only if we don't get caught up in another adventure. I want to make it home in time to watch the season finale of Breaking Bad: Jupiter Edition.
EXT. OVERHEAD OF DISTRICT 1100 STAGE
The area in front of the stage is filled up with robots in tattered clothes. White, soldier-like robots similar to the Peacekeepers are lined up, dividing the crowd into two.
EXT. BACKSTAGE
Bender, Leela, and Fry walk to the side of the stage to view the reaping. Robot Effie can be heard talking in the background, but she can't be understood over the main characters.
LEELA
Bender, did you really have to waste so much time teaching the wildlife how to swear?
BENDER
But Leela, it's so cool! They mimic the words that come out of my mouth!
ROBOT MOCKINGJAY
(in a high-pitched voice)
Bite my shiny metal ass!
Bender laughs. Fry looks out at the stage.
FRY
Hey look, something's going on.
OFFSCREEN VOICE
I volunteer! I volunteer as tribute!
Leela and Bender peek out at the stage alongside Fry.
LEELA
Hold on, anyone can just volunteer for this thing?
Bender looks at the area in front of the stage.
BENDER
I wonder who it was who-
Bender's eyes extend. He gasps. A female robot walks to the stage. She has a slim physique, with metal "hair" in a dutch braid, like Katniss Everdeen.
BENDER
Woah, what I'd do to get a piece of that!
Leela looks down at him.
LEELA
Bender!
Robot Effie stands over a glass bowl with several slips of paper in it.
ROBOT EFFIE
Now, for our other tribute...
Effie puts her hand in the bowl and takes a slip of paper out. She unfolds it and begins reading it aloud.
ROBOT EFFIE
Pee-
BENDER
I volunteer!
The crowd gasps and murmurs as Bender walks out onto the stage. Leela raises her palm to her forehead. Bender smirks and inspects his metal fingers as if checking his nails.
BENDER
Yeah, it's no big deal. I just thought I'd volunteer and put myself out there like this nice girl here instead of waiting for my name to be called.
ROBOT EFFIE
A volunteer who's not from the district? This is unheard of! Is this even allowed?
Effie looks at one of the Peacekeepers, who shrugs.
ROBOT EFFIE
Then it's settled! These two are our tributes for this year's Robot Games!
The crowd is silent. After Bender and Katniss awkwardly stand there for a moment, Bender leans over to ask Katniss a question.
BENDER
Geez, what's with the crowd? You'd think they'd be more excited for the robots representing them.
Katniss turns toward him, angry.
ROBOT KATNISS
You idiot! Do you have any idea what the Robot Games even are?
BENDER
Not really, no.
ROBOT KATNISS
They put all of us in an arena and make us fight to the death!
Fry and Leela gasp. Bender's eyes widen.
(beat)
BENDER
So... what're you doing tomorrow night?
