Hey everyone! I'm here with a new story. This story is a request from FeralG3! Robbie's cousin loses almost everything in his life, but a fresh start sends him to his cousin, Robbie Shapiro's, hometown and high school, Hollywood Arts. Sparks fly between him and Tori Vega, but will his anger get the best of him?

Patrick is based off of actor, Alexander Ludwig, Amanda is based off of actress, Michelle Trachtenberg, and Angela is based off of actress, Hayden Panettiere.

Disclaimers: I don't own anything with Victorious except the characters I create. Victorious is owned by Nickelodeon and Dan Schneider.


With No Goodbye

GLENDALE, AZ

APRIL 2012

She's gone.

It's my fault.

Patrick Wilson looks at his PearPad at the picture of him and his best friend making funny faces at the camera, and feels his jaw clenching in rage. He swipes to another picture of the same girl with her arms wrapped around his shoulders as she stood behind him on a half wall. Her blue eyes full of light. Her dark hair had sunshine dancing in it while her nose ring glints making everything seem brighter. Her face split into a bright and large smile, mocking him.

"Patty?" Patrick's blue eyes shift upward to see his mother rolling into his room in her wheelchair.

"Mom, the doctor said you shouldn't be moving around this much after therapy," Patrick gets up off his bed, and walks over to his mother to help her turn around. His size dwarfed his mother, and he pushed her down the hall back towards her bedroom in their small three-bedroom house.

"Baby bear, I'm sorry about Amanda, I wish you would go see someone,"

"Mom, it's okay. Don't worry about it,"

"Patrick, get down here," Patrick kneels in front of his mother, "it's okay to not be okay. You and Amanda have known each other since you were four, and I don't want you to do that thing that you do where you put everyone else before yourself. I don't need you to be strong right now,"

"But you do, Mom," Patrick lifts his mom out of her chair and places her on her bed, "just rest, I'll worry about dinner tonight," Patrick turns to leave the room.

"Baby bear?" Patrick turns back to his Mom. She gives him a weak smile.

"Yes, Mom?"

"I love you,"

"I love you, too,"

"Promise me that you'll talk to someone?"

"I will." Patrick watches as her eyes gently fall, and he quietly shuts his mother's door. He hears the soft dinging of his chat from his room, and he quickly sprints down the hall.

Incoming Call from RockRobster

Robbie always knows when I need him. Patrick clicks accept and sits down at his desk

"Hey, Robbie," Patrick gives a weak wave as he looks at his cousin on the screen.

"Don't 'hey, Robbie' me. When were you going to tell me about Amanda?"

"I was dealing with things…"

"Dude, she was my friend, too," Patrick looks down at his wringing hands. Though him and Robbie looked nothing alike, Robbie being lanky with brown curly hair while Patrick was muscular with sleek blonde hair…they tended to be a lot like in personality. Loving and loyal to a fault, and putting others before themselves.

"She is…was…my best friend, Robbie, and she's gone. You aren't going to have to go to school every day and not see her or look at her locker…"

"Bear,"

"You know what, Robbie? I gotta go." Patrick quickly ends the call and took a deep breath. This is why I don't want to talk to anyone. No one understands. Patrick quickly whips out his phone and texts his older sister to see when she would be home because he really needed to go to the gym.

To Mouse: When are you getting home?

To Bear: I'm heading up the driveway now. Why what's up?

To Mouse: Need to get out of the house, and I don't wanna leave Mom alone since she had PT today.

Patrick hears the soft click of the lock as his sister opens the front door and the gentle step of her feet as she approaches his room.

"Hey," Patrick turns to see his older sister leaning against his door frame. Her blonde hair is pulled into a loose bun and a soft smile playing on her lips.

"Hey," Patrick stands up and walks over to her. Patrick stands at six-two while his sister barely hits five-five.

"What's up?"

"Just…"

"I heard at school that you are coming back tomorrow,"

"Principal Jones won't let me miss any more days,"

"You know all of us are here for you, Bear,"

"I know, Mouse, I just don't think I'm ready…"

"We have grief counselors on staff for the rest of the year,"

"Like they understand,"

"They don't, but they can help you understand," Patrick feels his hands balling into fists. "I wish you would talk to me…"

"Why? So, you can gossip about me in the teacher's lounge?"

"Bear…"

"I'm gonna go. Mom's sleeping. Don't forget to give her, her meds at four thirty, Angie." Patrick pushes past his sister and rips open the front door before slamming it shut. Angela looks at her retreating brother's figure from the front window when she feels her phone ringing in her bag.

Incoming call Tadpole…

"Hey Robbie,"

"Hey Angie, have you talked to Pat?"

"You mean the figure that just left the house? Barely,"

"How is he?"

"Not well,"

"What happened? Did this have anything to do with the you know what?"

"Yea…I think he blames himself, Robbie,"

"Why?"

"Because she overdosed on his watch, Tadpole,"

"What?"

"She complained about a headache, so he gave her the meds and went to take a shower since he had been at his Hapkido class,"

"And she took…"

"She took the whole bottle, they watched a movie, and he didn't realize what happened until it was too late,"

"Is he…"

"He isn't okay, but I'm hoping that he will start therapy since he is heading back to school tomorrow,"

"When did it happen?"

"Two weeks ago. He's been throwing himself into taking care of Mom in order to not deal with his problems,"

"Keep me up to date, Mouse?"

"I will, Tadpole, sorry that I didn't tell you,"

"It's okay. I get it. You had enough on your plate. Love you, but I have to get back to school."

"Love you, too."


HOLLYWOOD ARTS

Robbie hung up the phone and stared at it.

"Hi, Robbie!" Cat takes a seat next to Robbie, but her face quickly falls when she notices the somber look on Robbie's face, "what's wrong, Robbie?" Cat's book bag falls to the side causing a soft thunk that jolts Robbie eyes towards her. She takes his hands into hers and gently stroking his skin.

"N…nothing,"

"Robbie, you can tell me,"

"My cousin's friend, my friend, passed away…" Robbie twirls his phone in his hand before a cry shoots out of his body. Cat quickly envelopes her friend into a tight embrace.

"I'm so sorry, Robbie. So sorry."

"What's wrong with poindexter?" Jade takes a bite of her apple while she sits down across from her best friend and Robbie.

"Shhh, Jade, not today. Something bad happened," Cat rubs Robbie's back as his sobs start to earn looks of people from the cafe.

"Like what? Did Rex get called a puppet again?"

"My friend died Jade!" Jade stares at Robbie with wide-eyes and a mouth full of apple.

"Robbie…oh my god…" Jade swallows and looks into Robbie's crying eyes, "I'm sorry. I didn't…"

"No! You didn't, but maybe if you weren't such a bitch than maybe you wouldn't say shitty things with everything that comes out of your mouth," Robbie pushes Cat away, grabs his bag, and quickly stalks away from the table. Jade tries to grab his hand, but he shakes her hand off.

"Robbie…"

"Go away, Jade." Jade looks at Cat with mouth agape.

"I didn't…"

"I know, Jadey, just give him time. We'll all go look for him later." Cat sadly smiles at her best friend, and slowly stabs her salad. Tori and André walk up to the table, but notice the noticeable somber mood.

"What's up with the sad vibes coming off you two?" André takes a seat next to his red-headed friend while he takes a bite of his pizza.

"Something Robbie said,"

"What did Robbie say?" Tori looks between the two of them.

"It's his story to tell," Jade stands and picks up her bag, "not ours. I'm sorry I've got to go." Jade walks towards the direction that Robbie ran off to.


"Robbie?" Jade gently pushes up the door to the tech lab, Robbie's favorite hiding place.

"Go away,"

"Not likely. I've never been good at following orders," Jade closes the door softly behind her, and looks at Robbie, sitting on the counter, wringing his hands.

"I don't want to talk you,"

"I know," Jade hops on the counter next to him, throwing her bag to the ground, "but I'm going to be right here when you want to," Robbie looks over at his friend with pink and blonde streaks in her hair, a piercing on her nose and eyebrow and a soft smile on her face, and breaks down into her arms.

"You look so much like her," Robbie says brokenly between sobs.

"I can put a bag on if that helps,"

"No, she was a great person," Jade takes Robbie's hand in hers.

"Well, you do have a habit of picking good friends. I mean…look at me," Robbie lets out a laugh. He sits back up and wipes off his face.

"My cousin does. She was his best friend…I just met her through him. Compared to him…I don't even deserve to be this upset about it especially after what his sister told me,"

"Doesn't mean she wasn't your friend," Jade smiles, "and it's okay for you to be sad. You're grieving, Robbie, it's okay to feel whatever you are feeling,"

"How do you know that?"

"That's what my therapist always told me when I started to see her,"

"When do you start seeing one of those?"

"Remember freshmen year when I was particularly mean?"

"Which time?" Jade smirks and playfully punches his arm.

"Right before Cat's birthday,"

"Yea…didn't you throw a chair at Sikowitz?"

"Yep, but anyway, my cousin had died. I was really close to him, and suddenly he was gone. Poof. I didn't get to say goodbye, and I was angry and I took it out on all of you. My mom signed me up for therapy the day after the chair incident, and for three weeks I just glared at her during our hour-long sessions until one day she just said, 'you have the upper-hand here, Jade, so what you decide to do with your sessions is fine, but don't waste it,' and I don't know…that hit me somewhere, and I started balling out of nowhere. I've been going ever since," Robbie shifted uncomfortably.

"How did he die?"

"He shot himself," Jade looks at her hands, "in the head. He had a lot of mental health issues, and one day the voices got too loud and he just ended it all,"

"That's how she died…" Jade whips her head towards Robbie.

"What?"

"She killed herself. She apparently overdosed on some pills,"

"Robbie…that sucks,"

"She had a really hard time coping with a bad thing that happened to her, and apparently couldn't go on anymore," Jade scoots closer to Robbie and squeezes his hand tightly, and rests her head on his shoulder and his head quickly perches on hers.

"I'm sorry,"

"Thanks, Jade, but I'm curious on why you followed me,"

"Because you looked like you needed a friend, and my inner-Beck compelled me to go,"

"Missing him?"

"Yea, I hate when he visits Canada because then my inner Jiminy Beck comes out telling me to fix the things that I mess up," Robbie and Jade let out a light chuckle, "I'm sorry, again,"

"Thanks. It's all good. I'll call my cousin again when he's cooled off, and maybe we can have a conversation,"

"Hopefully, but let's get back to class," Robbie nods and gathers his bags while Jade walks towards the door, "I won't tell anyone. Like I told Tori…it's your story to tell not mine,"

"Thanks, Jade. For everything, and I won't tell anyone your story either,"

"Thanks, Robbie. Beck says I need to be better at people, so I think I would get a gold star for the day." Robbie laughs as the lab door closes behinds them.

"For sure."


The sound of a punching bag fills the small brick gym's empty main room as Patrick lets out of fury of blow.

"Ya let it all go. Ya left me behind. Couldn't get that motherfucker out of your mind. I was there for you to hold you up, but then you took those pills with a pop, pop, pop," Patrick kept the time of his freestyle with his hits, "came back in and you smiled nice and big, knowing all the harm that you just did. Fell asleep watching that movie that you like, and you knew you wouldn't be wakin' up that night. Shakin', shakin', your eyes won't wake. I pray to God for both our sakes. How am I supposed to explain this to your mom? My whole world explodin' around me like bomb. My best friend decided there was no reason to live, and left me all alone with too much pain for a kid. How am I supposed to explain this to your girl? You decided that life wasn't worth the whirl and the dance you had, had no more twirls," Patrick didn't notice his tempo increasing or his beat getting more violent.

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa, man!" An older black man holds the bag still as Patrick makes eye contact with him and ceases his punches, "what did the bag do to you today?"

"Nothing just leave me alone, Mickey," Patrick starts punching the bags again until Mickey places a hand on his shoulder. "What?!" Patrick throws his gloves off and turns towards the man. Patrick stands a few inches taller than him, and he is glaring down at him with anger in his eyes.

"I heard about, Amanda, kid," Mickey places his other hand on Patrick's other shoulder, "I'm sorry." Patrick lets a sob escape his lips, and after that there was no stopping the tears. Patrick sinks to the floor and Mickey follows him down, holding him tightly. "I am so, so sorry."


Here is chapter one! Hurray! I loved using the real-life friendship of Liz and Matt in this chapter. Hope you guys stick around for chapter 2. This has been really fun to write. I've learned I really like prompts and requests. For reference, the gang are in their sophomore year, when I think Tori rolls in at the end of the year, so fifteen/sixteen years old. Angela is twenty-three.

Until Next Time!

-KMA