This work is AU and everyone here is human (no vampires). CrowFeri is the main pairing but there is also GureShin and a very background Rene/Lacus.

Fic is finished and i will be updating this every Thursday.

Dedicated to Darca, Amai and Twitter church of Ferid.

Lyrics at the begininng are from The Neighbourhood's song - Cry Baby. I'm crazy about this song and it really fits this story.

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Chapter 1

I think I talk too much

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Hello?

Are you there?

It's me…

You still don't pick up my phones…

Are you okay?

I'm fine…it's hard sometimes but I can live on my own…

I miss you…

Why did you left me?

––––––––

Ferid heard the sound of his alarm clock going off and opened his eyes. He felt his cat's tail touching his face. As always, his pet was lying on his chest, sleeping comfortably.

"Get away from me, Mika, I will be late for work," he said, and the cat only hissed at him.

Ferid got up from his bed and, scratching his back, he looked out the window. It was gloomy and cold - typical autumn weather. He went to the bathroom and took a quick shower. Another day, another daily routine. Shower, clothes and then breakfast. After this he will probably stop by his favorite coffee shop and order his favorite coffee. Then he will head back to the bookshop he was working at.
Nothing new.

After putting his long hair into a high ponytail he prepared his breakfast. His cat was walking near his feet, making sounds to catch his attention.

"You have your food in the bowl."

The cat looked at him with his big, blue eyes and Ferid sighed.

"Alright."

He gave him part of his toast and the cat meowed. Ferid smiled at him. He found Mika two years ago when it was raining very hard. He never wanted a pet but when he saw how small and fragile the creature was, he didn't hesitate. The cat was kind of moody and sometimes he scratched Ferid without a reason but still, he loved playing with him.

He wouldn't admit it but he couldn't live without him.

He looked at the clock and got out of his kitchen. He put his coat on and left his apartment. Ferid lived in the city center so he usually went to his work on foot.

He had some spare time, so he stopped at his favorite coffee shop.

Time to put his fake smile on, he thought.

"Ferid-san, welcome back!"

"Hello, it's good to see you~," he greeted the waitress.

"The usual?"

"You know me so well!~"

The girl smiled and started preparing his coffee. He looked around. There were only few people here in the morning. This place was usually crowded in the afternoon. Ferid sometimes visited this place after work to meet with…

"Oh! I almost forgot! Shinya-san was here a few minutes ago. He said that he finished his newest chapter and he will call you."

Shinya. That annoying guy who was insisting on meeting with him and who called himself 'his friend'. Ferid hated that because he didn't have any friends. He didn't need them. Friends are useless, they're making you weak and pathetic. Friends equaled feelings, and that was something that Ferid really despised.

But coming back to Shinya, he really didn't know why this guy was still bothering him. Their first meeting wasn't a pleasant one.

Shinya is a writer and when he finished writing his book Ferid's workplace invited him to talk about his new novel, and to sign some autographs. Ferid was working back then, when he heard what that guy was talking about. He never was a person who kept his thoughts to himself, so when he heard 'that bullshit' of course he reacted.

"Shinya-sama, could you tell us more about the relationship between main characters?" the journalist asked, and the young man with silver hair smiled.

"Of course! I love talking about them. You know, Han had really big problems this time. His work, family, and all secrets from the past coming back to him at the same time. So when he was almost at the verge of breakdown , I thought that relationship with Jeannie would be a good thing. He could have a person who could help him with all these problems. It would make him even stronger, that's what their relationship is about, to help each other to make…"

"What a bullshit."

Suddenly everything went quiet and all faces turned back to see a guy with lilac hair and glasses. He was leaning against a bookshelf, with a bored look on his face.

"I'm sorry?" Shinya looked at him with interest.

"What you're saying is bullshit. Relationship making people stronger? Why are you saying that? If he was a strong character, like you said, he could have done it alone . That would have made him even stronger because we would see, that he's an independent person who could repair his life by himself. But adding a relationship only showed that he can't do this alone, so he's weak."

"FERID!"

Ferid looked to the corner of the room. Krul, his boss, was looking at him. She was angry, very angry, and he knew that she would kill him later. But he couldn't resist. He was always like that - saying things that he thought were right.

"Oh!" Shinya smiled, and Krul looked at him surprised. "That's really interesting point of view! But you know, I'm a hopeless romantic so I couldn't resist adding the romance to my novel. But I like very much what you said!"

"Eh?" Ferid was surprised too. Usually writers started arguing and later on he had to listen to Krul's rambling about how inappropriate his behavior was. She threatened him every time, that if he continued on like that, she would fire him.

But Ferid didn't say anything more because Krul took him to her office so Shinya could sign some autographs. That guy was really strange.

What was even stranger was that, he came back to their bookstore the next day only to stalk him. Stalk is the best word, because after this Ferid meet him in his favorite café. He really didn't understand this guy. What was even weirder was that, the guy wanted to work with him.

And after that, he started meeting with Shinya. Usually it was Shinya who was talking and Ferid was reading his new chapters. Shinya was probably the first person who listened to him, and what was even more surprising, he took Ferid's words to his heart.

Their relationship was really weird. Shinya called this 'friendship' but Ferid never called Shinya his friend. He was meeting with him just to kill some time. That was what he told himself. But of course he enjoyed their meetings. Unless Shinya started questioning him about his personal life, that guy was really inquisitive.

Usually he asked about his love life because he couldn't believe that Ferid had never been in a relationship before.

Of course he had his 'partners' but usually they were meeting for 2-3 weeks and then they broke up.

"I told you this is your fault!" Shinya once told him, when they were at the café. Ferid was reading his new chapter at the time.

"I meet with you to talk about your novel, not my personal life," he said irritated.

"But that's more interesting~!"

Ferid smiled at him.

"So can I leave now that you don't need me?~"

"No, no, wait!" Shinya panicked and Ferid laughed. This guy is so stupid.

"But really, didn't you think about staying with someone longer?"

Five seconds. That's how long Shinya kept his mouth closed.

"I told you. Love is not something I need. Besides, I'm okay with my life. I can enjoy my time without drama and other relationship's crap."

Shinya took a sip of his coffee and looked through the window.

"But you know, you're young now but everybody want to have someone in their life later on."

Ferid stopped reading. For a moment he thought about his younger days. Back to high school. Back to the time when everything had started. He sighed.

"It's not your business," he said in his playful tone, but Shinya didn't change the subject.

"You told me once that you had been rejected by someone. That was a long time ago, you should forget about that…"

"Said person who didn't confess his feelings yet."

Shinya immediately went all red and Ferid smirked. He has learned over time how to shut this guy's mouth.

"Well, at least I have someone!"

"Can we go back to your novel? Or you will have to edit it alone."

Shinya didn't know everything about him because Ferid didn't like to open up to strangers. Although they knew each other for 8 months, he still didn't trust him.

"Here's your coffee!"

The girl handed the cup to Ferid and he paid. He took a sip and went to his workplace. He hoped that it won't rain because he forgot his umbrella.

He never liked rain because it reminded him of the past, and he became melancholic when it was raining. He hated himself in this state. He needed to stay himself.

He worked in Krul's bookstore for five years now. Their relationship was a strange one. She was always yelling at him, yet she never fired him. He might be arrogant and mean, yet every time a customer walks in to their shop, Ferid always helps with finding the right book. The writers and his co-workers complained about him sometimes, but customers always adored his person. He had read tons of books so he knew most of them, and that knowledge helped him what choosing a perfect book for each customer.

"Hello everybody!~" he greeted everyone cheerfully.

A girl with purple hair looked at him and he could swear that she murmured "go die".

"Oh! Chess! Nice to see you too!~" Said girl only sent him an angry look, so he added " Do you have a date tonight?"

"WHAT?!" She dropped the books she was carrying, and blushed very hard. "Why are you saying this?!"

Ferid smirked and gave her a long glance.

"Well, you dressed today slightly better than usually."

Oh, he loved teasing her. In one second she went from blushing to cursing under her nose.

"Slightly better?! And you! You look…" She looked at him. He was wearing black, skinny jeans with red loose sweater and a gray, loosely wrapped scarf around his neck. " You look…like… a model…argh! Go die, Bathory!"

She yelled and he laughed.

"Oh, Chess! I love you too~," he said playfully and, laughing, he went to their common room to leave his coat there.

"BATHORY!"

Oh, he knew this voice.

"Yes, Krul, dear?~" He gazed at the upper floor where Krul's office was.

"I want to see you in my office immediately! "

He nodded.

She doesn't sound happy, he thought. But did she ever was happy?

"Good morning."

Ferid opened the door and a dark haired boy greeted him.

"Oh, good morning René! How is your day?"

But the boy didn't answer. He wasn't a talkative person and the bags under his eyes scared almost every customer so he usually worked on the back. The only thing Ferid knew was that, René has a boyfriend called Lacus and that he works as a police officer. And that was only because he visited them once, not because René told them.

But Ferid liked him. Because, despite the fact that he wasn't talkative, he was smart when he finally opened his mouth. He just didn't talk crap like Chess.

After hanging his coat, he took the reading glasses out of his bag. He wore them only at work to protect his eyesight when he was reading or working on the computer.

He headed to Krul's office while humming. Chess, like always, sent him a death glare.

"I'm here!"

He opened the door. Young woman was working on her computer. She had pink hair and petite physique. But despite her appearance she was older than Ferid.

"Sit Bathory."

"Kind as always!"

She glared at him and then sighed.

"You know that today we will have another guest. Atsushi Tamahiko is coming this night to promote his new book."

"Of course I know about this. I hanged his posters all around our shop. What's the real reason for you calling me here?"

She stopped writing and crossed her arms on her chest.

"This is a really important guest and if he will spread a good word about our bookshop we could become more famous." She stood up and came up to him. He was wearing his irritating smile and Krul wanted to punch him as always. "But if you start talking crap like you always do he can get angry and we won't get any recognition!"

"Oh! Krul, dearie, you hurt my feelings!" He put a hand on his heart pretending to be hurt ,and she only angrily hit her desk with a hand.

"Bathory! Not everyone is crazy like your Hiiragi friend!"

"He's not my frien-"

"I DON'T CARE JUST BE QUIET TODAY OR I WILL FIRE YOU!"

"We both know that you won't do that," he said that while smiling, but he knew he was walking on thin ice, so when he saw that she went all read he put his hands in the air in his defense.

"BATH-"

"All right, all right~! I will behave! I will work on the back with René if you don't want to see my face."

He winked and Krul sighed.

He will be the death of her but like he said, she won't fire him. He was too valuable, and since he was a book nerd he was a good employee. But his character! If he changed his attitude she wouldn't have a heart attack every day.

"This isn't funny! Now go back to your work. The writer will come at 6 pm."

"Yes, yes!"

He waved his hand and closed the door. Krul always yelled at him but that's how their relationship worked. It was better this way. She wasn't his friend, yet she wasn't his enemy either. Perfect.

He went to a cash register and started preparing for his work. He looked again at the poster with Atsushi Tamahiko's photo. He was a good looking guy with brown, short hair. That's why Chess was looking better today.

"Chess, do you have a crush on Atsushi Tamahiko?"he asked her playfully.

"Shut up, Bathory!" she yelled from behind one of the bookshelves, and he laughed.

"Awww but that's so cute!"

"A-at least I have someone! Not like you… you lonely loser!"

"Ouch! You hurt my feelings!"

"You don't have them!"

He shook his head. Sometimes his short-time partners visited him at work but he didn't like it. He was meeting with them to enjoy himself – being together in public was simply irritating. It's like they wanted to shout to everyone "Hey, look at us, WE'RE DAITING!", which wasn't true because he didn't date anyone.

Chess usually was making fun of his short-time so called 'relationships', so he always teased her in return that she didn't have a boyfriend, and she usually went all mad and cursed him. Stupid girl.

He was working on his computer and from time to time he helped customers with books. Few new titles came to their shop, and a lot of people came to ask about tonight's meeting with the famous author. Ferid personally didn't like Tamahiko's works. Even that white haired idiot was better than him -he would have never admitted that out loud-, but he had a lot of fangirls because of his appearance. And of course he was writing romance. Ugh.

That was the reason why he should stay at the back with René. Even that silent boy was a more enjoyable company than a playboy writer.

He looked at the clock. It was a lunch time and he felt like he could eat something. Then the door opened.

"Oh! Ferid! Nice to see you!"

The fool came, he thought.

"It's too bad I can't say the same~"

Shinya was wearing a gray coat and a blue scarf that matched his eyes. He pretended to be hurt but then put a goofy smile on his face.

"I thought you got my message that I will call you."

"Call me, not visit. There is a difference."

"I know, but I wanted to give you this chapter personally! I also thought we could eat lunch together!"

Ferid looked at him suspiciously and put his hands on his hips.

"Lunch? Together? Eh~ That's so weird! You usually eat with your crush-friend."

Shinya sighed and leaned against a bookshelf.

"He's busy with work. So I thought we could eat together!"

"So I'm your second choice then? I would be hurt if we were friends."

"Now you're hurting my feelings! Of course you're my friend! That's why we should eat together!"

"You win this time. But you're paying."

Ferid winked and then went for his coat. Shinya stared at him.

"What?! But I don't have much money!"

Ferid turned back and faked a sad face.

"And I'm a poor bookseller. But fine I will eat alone then."

"Wait!"

––––––––

Ferid stared at the pages while he was eating his salad. Shinya was talking something about his best friend and how he ignored him these days but Ferid really didn't care, so he nodded his head from time to time, pretending to be listening.

"That idiot. I helped him after his girlfriend broke up with him and now he's ignoring me because of work. I should have ignored him back then!"

"But you didn't because you are hopelessly in love," said Ferid without even looking at Shinya. He knew the man probably blushed a little bit, and he heard him sighing.

"Maybe you're right. Speaking of which, how's that tall, dark haired guy you were meeting with?"

"Oh, him? We are no longer meeting each other," he said playfully, while putting Shinya's work on the table and getting back to eating. Shinya stared at him and then he shook his head.

"But I thought you liked him?"

"Nah, he was good in bed but he was really boring so I cut ties with him~"

"Oh my God, I can't believe it. You will really be alone."

Not this talk again, Ferid thought. It wasn't Shinya's fault thou. He didn't know everything about him. Maybe if he knew he would have left this topic, but Ferid would rather die than open himself to this idiot.

"Shinya." White haired guy looked at him. He knew that when Ferid called him by his name, not by 'idiot' or something like that, he was irritated. And that didn't happen very often.

"You're saying things like that but you are not better. You're talking about your friend that you love very much, but I recall you didn't confess your feelings yet. And he had a girlfriend so he probably is out of your league. So what's the difference between us? You're alone too because you love a guy who will probably never love you back."

Did he went too far? He probably did. But he couldn't do anything about it. He was like that.

Shinya only stared at him stupidly.

Come on, say something stupid idiot, Ferid thought.

And then Shinya laughed. Ferid exhaled. Drama avoided.

"Haha, you're right Ferid! I'm hopelessly in love with a guy who only sees me as a friend. And that makes me lonely, but what I'm trying to do for you is to avoid a path like mine. Yes, I love him, and I'm grateful for that feeling. But despite the fact that I have friends I'm lonely and I don't want the same thing for you. So you must meet someone and be happy so you won't be an idiot like me."

What the hell, thought Ferid. What was this guy talking about? Is this what it was like to have a friend? Who is caring about you? Who thinks about you? Who doesn't want to hurt your feelings? Who acknowledges them?

He squeezed his hand. He couldn't give in to this feeling. He must cut this crap, friendship talk immediately. He grunted.

"It's late and soon we'll have prepare our shop for our guest."

Shinya stared at him and then he nodded. Ferid stood up and put his coat on. He left money on the table and headed for the doors.

"Hey, Ferid?"

He looked back at Shinya.

"You don't hate me…right?"

Ferid rolled his eyes.

"If I hated you, would I take your stupid chapter with me? Think for once~."

And then he left.

This guy really irritated him. Too many unnecessary thoughts.

––––––––

The bookstore was really crowded. So many young girls came, excited about meeting Tamahiko. Ferid greeted them but Krul's death glare informed him that he should go back to René because the author will soon appear.

He put his glasses back on and started working on filing books.

René was working quietly and the only sound they could hear was girls' excited voices. Soon an applause reached their ears. The playboy writer probably arrived.

"I wish I could tell him what I'm thinking about his new novel~," Ferid complained, and René stared at him.

"Krul would kill you."

"Eh, you're right René. Nobody wants to see an angry Krul. She would get wrinkles!"

He chuckled and went back to work. The author started talking and another round of applause reached their room.

"Because you know, love is really important!"

Oh please, can I punch this guy, Ferid thought, making disgusted sound. He should have put his earphones on, so he could listen to some music instead. Everything was better than this crap.

"It makes your heart explode with positive feelings!"

Where does this guy live? In dreamland? Did he even learn anything about life?

Relationship this, relationship that, why people needed them?

It's not like Ferid was like that from the beginning. He fell in love once, or rather, he thought it was love. But what he got in exchange wasn't a fluttering heart or butterflies in his stomach. It was more like someone punched him in the gut really hard.

"It's not like we're friends. I don't need you anymore, so we should all go our separate ways. I still don't like you, Bathory."

That was what he received for his kindness and help. So he won't listen to all this crap about how wonderful love is. Love makes you attached to someone and when that person breaks your heart, it only makes you miserable. He felt that once. He didn't want to feel like that ever again.

"EVERYBODY STAND BACK! THIS BASTARD IS MINE!"

Okay, that didn't sound like a handsome douche Tamahiko. Did he misheard?

He looked at René to see if he heard it too. He looked at him a little surprised.

Then they heard screams.

Okay, that was weird.

"Stay here, I will look at it," Ferid said.

He carefully opened the door and looked around the shop. Scared girls were sitting under one of the bookshelves and the author looked as if he saw a ghost. In the center there was a guy in the black hoodie with a gun. He was pointing at Tamahiko while shouting something about his girlfriend that cheated on him with Tamahiko.

Great, that was what they needed. Now they would be really famous. Krul will be delighted. Or probably not.

"SHUT UP YOU ASSHOLE!"

He fired into the celling and the girls screamed.

Okay, that was dangerous. This guy was a psycho.

Ferid looked around. Where the hell were that author's bodyguards? Shinya didn't had his own when he was in their shop selling his books and most of the authors didn't have them but isn't this guy famous?

Krul was in the corner, holding crying Chess, and she looked at him with her eyes saying 'do something'. But what could he do?

He looked back. René observed the situation while texting.

Right, his boyfriend was a cop. So now they only needed to wait.

Ferid hid behind a bookshelf and watched closely as the situation unfolded.

Daily routine, yeah right. And he thought that this would be a normal day.

"We should talk, stop waving the gun around! You're only scaring people!"

"IT'S YOUR FAULT!"

The psycho man pointed again at the writer, and that douche did something that really irritated Ferid. He took Krul by her arm and then he shielded himself with her. It's not that Ferid cared but if Krul lost her life here then he would loose his job, and he really loved it.

Where the hell were cops?!

"RELASE HER! IT'S ME AND YOU!"

"YEAH LET GO OF ME YOU ASSHOLE!"

Krul was really angry and she was trying to get away from the Tamahiko but he was stronger than her.

"Stay where you are or he will kill us!"

"He only wants you not me! Put me down!"

The situation was hopeless. And the fact that Chess was looking at him like she was begging him to help them irritated him most. But what he could do?

The hooded man was standing in the center of the shop – his back to Ferid - so he couldn't see him.

He could sneak up behind him and knock him down, but will he take the risk? That psycho could kill him in a second and Ferid liked his life. Too young and pretty to die in a place like that!

But he couldn't leave it like that.

He came a little bit closer to the man. If he succeeds he should ask for a pay rise. And a big one at that!

"I'm counting to three! If you don't let go of that woman I will kill both of you!"

He was right behind the guy when that happened.

One girl.

One fucking girl spotted him and shouted 'SAVE US!'

In an instant, the guy turned around and fired. Fortunately, Ferid hid himself in time behind one of the bookshelves.

"I know you're there! Come out!"

Shit.

"Ha ha! You spotted me! Too bad, I thought I will be a hero and save everyone."

There was no point of hiding, so Ferid came out and stood in front of the man. He looked young but his angry face really aged him. He was pointing his gun at Ferid now, so he put his hands in the air in defense.

"But you didn't, so now go to that wall and wait patiently till I kill this douchebag!"

Tamahiko whined and Ferid sent him a bored look.

"Okay, I understand that you want to kill him, but why should you bother all of us? You know we don't give a crap about your life?"

"What the hell are you saying , Ferid!" Krul groaned, but he only spared her a glance. He hoped that she will understand what he was doing. That he was stalling for time till the cops come.

Seriously, how long should they wait?

"I'm saying that this guy could have waited after the event and then kill this playboy. Seriously, why did you do all this drama?"

The guy looked at him as if he was crazy. Well, he was right. What he was doing right now was crazy and stupid, but there was no turning back.

"Because I wanted for him to suffer! Why should I watch him enjoy his life and success when he stole my girlfriend?! I loved her!"

Oh god, why everything must be about relationships? And that's why he wasn't in one, to avoid situations like this. Well, maybe not as dramatic as this one but he was fed up with arguments and all this crap about trust.

"But unfortunately your girlfriend didn't love you back and went to bed with that douchebag. You just have a bad taste in women."

And that's when he realized that he might have went too far.

Everything that happened after was just like they showed in the movies – it became quiet and he could see people moving in slow motion.

The man suddenly became very angry. He shouted but, at the same moment, some other men shouted too, something like 'POLICE'.

Finally, he thought.

But the man didn't took his gun off Ferid. He fired.

The bullet went straight at him.

He should have died .

But he didn't.

Strong arms wrapped around him and knocked him down.

The bullet only scratched his arm, but it wasn't fatal.

He felt the pain both from his injured arm and from the impact when he hit the floor. He didn't know when he closed his eyes but when he opened them again he saw a figure on top of him.

"Are you all right?!"

The voice belonged to a man. Ferid blinked, disoriented.

"Fuck, we should have taken action earlier. Guys, did you get that guy?!"

"We knocked him down, we will take him to the police station," the feminine voice answered.

Ferid blinked once again. He was alive. Only his arm was in pain but it was bearable. But what was more important was that, someone was holding him in his arms. It was a man, very masculine, with red hair and a black braid.

"I'm sorry sir that I didn't save you earlier. We didn't knew that you will take action. I will take you to the hospital right now."

That guy was really close to him, he could feel his breath on his skin.

He was also very handsome.

Did his heart skip a beat?

––––––––

Hi if you're reading this then congratulations, you finished the first chapter XDD

When I was thinking about this AU I wasn't planning to write this because I've never in my life wrote a fanfic in english but my friend encouraged me to write this and here it is :D

I wanted to write something about Ferid and Crowley because I love these two and this ship deserves more love! and a modern AU :D Also I decided to experiment a little with friendship between Ferid and Shinya and in the end I fell in love with their bro-relationship XD You usually don't see them as friends, so I hope you will like my crazy idea :D

More CrowFeri interactions will come soon.