Author's Note: This idea came to me through the thought that everyone does low numbers or 100 reasons. I thought that I would be different and post 36. Tell me what you think please. Critism welcome. No flames. Flames are for marshmellows and fireplaces, not for stories. Enjoy ^^
Disclaimer:I don't own Big Time Rush or any of the songs I plan on using.
Tell Me 36 Reasons Why You Love Me
Kendall sat at his desk in the shared room between him and James. His pencil was between his thumb and forefinger, absent-mindedly bouncing it again and again. Lines formed in his forehead as he pondered James' request for the billionth time.
"James, what do you want me to do to prove that I'm not lying?" Kendall begged. His lover stood silently in the pouring rain, too close to the ledge for his liking. Only noises heard were the sounds of LA and of the thunderstorm raging around them. His pulse beat faster with each moment that his question was unanswered. Finally, the drenched brunette broke the silence.
"Give me 36 reasons why you love me, 36 reasons why I should live. Don't give me ones like 'you're beautiful' or 'you have an amazing smile'. If you do, I want you to explain them in detail…. I want them to be real." He stated. Kendall gaped at him like a fish out of water. Silence engulfed them once again as the blonde thought of something, anything to say.
"Alright. I will. Just… Just promise me you won't do any rash until I give them to you." Kendall responded. James nodded with a slight hesitance. The older boy held out his hand but the younger ignored it and walked back into the building, leaving Kendall standing there soaked and broken hearted.
He wiped away the tears of anger and frustration with a quick hand. He was grateful that Logan was so paranoid about James' mental state that he and Carlos never left the boy alone. That being said, they also never let Kendall anywhere near him. But Kendall could live with that; he didn't deserve him until he could prove himself worthy, to him and to himself.
Angrily, he growled and tapped his pencil against the desk. Frustrated, he slammed the writing utensil down, ran both hands through his hair and leaned back in the chair. Kendall had imagined it would be hard, but it was damn near impossible! His head hit the desk as he thought about how he had landed himself in this current situation.
Making a mistake was one thing, but sleeping with your ex girlfriend 3 times behind his back was another. James was fragile since what happened with that one guy…. But everyone had thought that he was doing better and that he would get past it. Then Kendall went and destroyed all the work and trust he had spent years building with a single one night stand with someone he knew he shouldn't be near.
Tears formed and began rolling down his cheeks as he buried his head in his arms that he had laid across the surface of the desk. Days and days he had spent trying to come up with things. Yet he had none. The only ones he had were the ones that James had told him not to use. Yet, those were some of the ones Kendall thought were important.
Hours passed and still nothing came. It was really late into the night when the idea hit. He was staring at the clock with a blank expression when it came. Quickly, he began to write it all down on a single sheet of paper. He smiled a brilliant smile when he finished. The idea was perfect. James was going to love it. Kendall tucked it away in a safe place and crawled into bed. His plan would start the moment that his one true love was well again. It was the first night in a long time the blonde had gotten a good night's sleep.
