Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi or any of these characters. Dialogue from the show is not mine either, but it is used to canonically advance the story.


"I hope you like pain, Rookie."

I could've punched Luke in his face then. The consequences for skipping practice I was prepared for, but Luke didn't have to be an ass about it. He wasn't even captain. As I skated my feet off, I snuck a look at Luke and Dallas. They were smirking, damn near reveling in my pain. That was just fine. They knew I was, and am, twice the player they are. I'm three years younger, too.

"Alright, that's enough for now."

The signal couldn't have come at a better time. My legs buckled and I hit the ice. I stayed there for a few moments to catch my breath, and I heard Luke's and Dallas's laughter as I struggled to get up. That fire starts to flare up, the fire I became nearly incapable of taming. I headed to the locker room to change, and it still danced throughout my body.

"Here, refuel," Dallas said as he threw me a bottle of Gatorade. "Remember that we're the only ones you got here."

I waited until he was gone before I gave in to my oncoming meltdown. The bottle landed across the room. Violently, I threw my clothes into the bag, then my skate went flying. Anything to soothe the anger I could physically feel pumping inside me. Staying seated, I noted that I was feeling calmer by the second. I felt a slight sting coming from my right palm, and I was surprised to see a swelling of blood going across. The skate must have sliced my skin. Not knowing what else to do, I wrapped my hand and cried.


Surprisingly, Dallas considered my idea about switching to right wing. The payoff was huge. The game was tied with 10 seconds left, and it was all up to me. After the whistle blew, Dallas swung the biscuit to me. 7 seconds. I moved quickly, striking a balance between looking at the clock and looking at the ice ahead of me. 5 seconds. Almost time to make the move. That goalie was not quick enough to stop my shot. 2 seconds. 1 second. I win the game.

My team skated towards me in a frenzy, even Luke, who was pissed about switching to left wing. Their deafening cheers were what I had been needing to hear at that time. My right wing plan worked out perfectly, and I was a hero and winner once again.

Back in the locker room, Dallas told me he had something to show me. He led me to the ice entrance. I began to sweat a little.

"Soon, everyone is going to want a piece of Campbell Saunders," he sad as he threw the door open. I'm instantly blinded by flashing cameras.

"Cam! Campbell! Saunders! How do you feel about finally shaking off your slump?"

I stood transfixed. My inner-monologue couldn't even work up an answer.

"What were you thinking as you scored the winning goal?"

Tears started to form in my eyes as my heartbeat quickened.

"Um, Rookie has a little big of stage fright," Dallas interjected. "I'll handle al questions from here."

I bolted from the area, with no time to thank Dallas for bailing me out. That fire came back. What could possibly be so great about a junior hockey team? What was so great about me? I hated being a prodigy. I hated hockey and the pressure it brought with it. I hated the attention.

Once again, I trashed the locker room. Remembering what it felt like after accidentally cutting my palm, I picked up the skate and pressed it right on the healing wound. You'll feel better, calmer. Trust me. But I didn't trust it. Nothing done out of a complete lack of control can be trusted. At that moment, I was scared of myself.

I lowered the skate and sobbed once more.


Maya's texts and voicemails littered my phone. It's not as if I didn't want to talk to her, but I was packing. Toronto, and Degrassi, was a mistake I knew better than to make. I was worried that my dad would throw a fit, even ignore me for a while, but compared to the pressure on the ice and from the press, it was something I could handle.

The door creaked open, and Maya herself came into my room. I'm surprised, but also glad, to see her. Seeing her always had the power to make my day. However, I knew I had to keep a distance to ease the parting blow. I guess it's too bad that it didn't quite work out that way.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, caught in the act.

"I told your billet dad I was giving you your missed homework." She looked past me, to my half-packed suitcase. "What is this?"

What else could I tell her?

"I'm ready to go home, Maya. I've had a bad couple of days and I just wanna go home."

The worry and hurt on her face pained me. I didn't want to hurt her by leaving-we had just gotten together-but I felt that staying would have been detrimental to her as well as myself. I had to convince her that she was better off with me gone.

"Okay, well, can we just…just talk about this for a minute, Cam?"

She sounded devastated, and I wasn't prepared for that. I wanted to avoid any kind of argument. I wanted to leave in peace. Obviously, Maya wasn't going to let me do either of these things.

"Sure, okay," I said, defeated.

"What's bothering you?"

Sighing, I launched into an explanation about the pressure I was under with hockey, and about how my teammates only liked me when I was a winner. Of course, this didn't skim the surface of my problems, but I wasn't ready to unload my baggage onto her. I didn't know if I ever would. She crossed her arms, and I could tell she thought I was overreacting. It bothered me. And then it came.

"Well, don't you think you're-"

"You think I want to feel this way? I'm all out of ideas, Maya!" My exasperation made its way to the surface. She needed to understand, even if she didn't have the whole story. It's like my head isn't screwed on right."

She stared at me for a few moments, as if she was trying to find a comforting word. When it failed to come, she put her arm around me instead and laid her head on my shoulder.

"I just don't want you to quit over a couple of bad days. You may regret it when you're back home."

She still didn't get it. I didn't want them to, but a few tears showed up anyway.

"I just want to be happy, Maya," I whispered.

She straightened up, suddenly, with a little bounce.

"You know what I think you need? A break. Hockey is too much for you right now. You don't have time for much else. You can take a break, and hang out with me and your friends more. No pressure."

Man, Maya's heart was definitely in the right place. But there are no breaks in this league, not even for the bench players. For the child prodigy? Your break is the gulp of water between practices. But as I looked into her eyes, I knew I couldn't lie to her. There was concern and hope there. I decided to stay for her.

"I'll see what I can do."

She threw her arms around me, smiling. In that moment I softened, knowing that we both felt better. I already knew something drastic would have to be done to get that break. But as I thought of our time at Little Miss Steaks, and how comfortable I was with her and her friends, I knew it would be worth it.


A/N: This is my attempt at writing a Cam fan-fiction, obviously. I have lots of this written and I'm just now getting this up on the site. It's my first story ever, and I'm proud that I'm going through with this idea. It's mostly canon up until the events of BSS. Then I turn it into my own take. Please review and leave me constructive criticism, I want to become a better writer!