30 Ways to Make Uchiha Sasuke Punch You in the Mouth

1. Dye his hair pink.

2. Point out his newly dyed hair. Insist he's gay.

3. Set him up on a date with Naruto or Neji.

4. Steal all of the tomatoes in his house and throw them on the front wall. Insist a band of flying monkeys were the culprit.

5. Paint the Uchiha symbol on the mountain images of the hokages, along with the word "PWNED".

6. Blame Sasuke.

7. Hug him.

8. Kiss him.

9. Spread the rumor that Sasuke left the village to be a gay slave to Orochimaru, because Naruto didn't love him enough.

10. Constantly pester him with questions about Itachi.

11. Ask if he's in love with Itachi.

12. Never believe him when he says no.

13. Bring Itachi home.

14. After Sasuke was mysteriously placed in a pink dress (with ruffles!).

15. Buy a cockatoo and name it Sasuke.

16. Train the cockatoo to sit on his head and mock him.

17. Steal Kakashi's Icha Icha Paradise collection, and hide it in a drawer in Sasuke's room. When Kakashi comes looking for it, explain that Sasuke stole them, in order to educate himself of how he should best approach Naruto and admit he's gay.

18. Laugh at everything. Everything.

19. Wake him up at 1 in the morning, screeching HAPPY BIRTHDAY at the top of your lungs. In November.

20. Insist that every day is a day for Christmas carols!

21. Also insist that Sasuke sing along. Whether he likes it or not.

22. Pour super glue on the toilet seat and wait for him to sit on it.

23. Bring a camera.

24. Fix flour inside the pipe of the showerhead.

25. Wait for him to take a shower. Wait for him to come flying out from behind the curtain, cursing loudly. Record it on a video camera.

26. Send the tape in to the news.

27. Bring home a weasel.

28. Name it Itachi.

29. Glare at inanimate objects and insist that they are out to get you.

30. Two words: Baby pictures.