NOTE: Hi.

I was forced to babysit my cousins one weekend. That came with watching cartoons and apparently they liked Gravity Falls. So I didn't change the channel lest they unleash their (unhygienic) wrath upon me.

It's a really good show though. It was good. It's good. I watched more of it. I watched the episodes. I watched ALL the episodes. It's an awesome show.

And I came up with this after seeing some memes. Enjoy.


"I have an old friend of mine. I'd love to introduce him...but we haven't been on good terms for the past forty years and all. Be wary of him." – Bill


Stanford Pines nearly stumbled out of the bathroom after suffering from an earlier-than-expected coup within the caverns under his stomach. He made a mental note to 'kindly' inform Mable of some much needed improvements in her cooking, grumbling all the while at the mountain breeze that swept inside.

Come to think of it: the breeze was colder than usual.

Stan stopped in his tracks, his mild shivering ceasing amid his train of thought. It wasn't supposed to be this cold at the four in the morning. Assuming a woodpecker drilled another hole in the ceiling somewhere, he automatically turned towards the door—

A tall shadow moved away from the window.

The old man took a minute to register what he just saw. And another minute to realize that he wasn't dreaming. In the next thirty seconds, he swung the door open, his cane firmly in his grasp, ready to pummel whoever was trying to break into the Mystery Shack.

"Who's out there!"

The wilderness tauntingly replied back at him with a chill across his skin. He began to shake from the cold again.

"Hello!"

The sound of rustling leaves whispered back from the dim distance. He could have sworn it was getting misty out there.

"I know you're out there! And if you come back here before dawn, I'm calling the cops on you!" He stepped forward—

And stubbed his toe against one of his own relics sitting on the front porch.

Stan's wailing would have been enough to wake a normal sleeping creature within a one mile radius. He shook his fist against the dawn, craning at an angle under the pressure of the throbbing in his foot.

"Get out o' here, you damn kids!"

The old man made to pick up his cane until he noticed that the Rock That Looks Like A Face held a piece of paper under it. He picked it up.

Stanford grumbled, limping back inside.


The note was cryptic. The Pine twins Dipper and Mabel sat on both sides of the dinner table, idling away at the piece of paper Gruncle Stan found early this morning. It didn't seem to be a threat but it sounded close to being a warning. More like a tease.

"So Bill has friends?" Mabel asked her brother, cuddling Waddles onto her lap shortly after finishing her bowl of...steak.

Dipper peeked over the corner into the living room. Sure enough, their great uncle was sitting on the couch with a cast around his toe complete with a purple jewel Mabel cheerfully glued on. The morning news somewhat enraptured him today which was fairly uncommon.

"Boop."

"Mabel, please?"

Mabel smirked and poked his cheek again. "Bop. Hey, what's it say?"

Book Three came open as Dipper flipped through the pages. The section detailing Bill Cipher was unnervingly stained with red spatters. None of the twins hoped to deliberate any further than that. The demon was not very kind when they confronted him on the plane of existence that was Stan's mind not too long ago.

"Other than the obvious..."

Mabel pouted and held up her pet pig. "What do you think, Waddles?" Waddles snorted nonchalantly. "You too? Ah, well, I can't blame you for being clueless." The pig then began scooted out of her grasp and making a head for the note on the table. Dipper grabbed it before it ended up in the animal's mouth.

"Hey! Mabel!"

"Sorry, Waddles, but you can't eat that. It's from our old friend, Bill—"

"Wait! You kids know that Bill kid? Is he one of Wendy's friends?" Stan hollered from the living room.

The Pine twins simultaneously took up the classic diversion. "Uh, well, n-not really! Ha-ha! You can go, uh, watch the news now, ha-ha-ha!"

Mabel elbowed her brother. She shot him a sharp look: Really, Dipper? Sound more genuine!

How can I? Dipper glared back.

Let me do this. "Oh, he's just someone we met a f-few days ago at, uh, at the, uh..."

"The convenience store!" Dipper completed for her before resuming eye communication. You stuttered! I'll take it from here.

Fine! Mabel pouted, picked up Waddles, and sat back on the kitchen stool.

There was a brief pause that neither twin took notice of. After that, Stan sounded rather peeved. "Well, tell him to quit it 'cause I might get gangrene from that little prank of his. I don't know what he means by that 'old friend' thing but don't get me involved unless they're planning on taking the tour."

"Sure thing, Gruncle Stan," came the chorused reply. And that was the end of that. The twins sighed in relief.

Dipper held up the note. "Whatever this is, it's something that we shouldn't take lightly."

"Well, what do we do then?" Mabel's eyes suddenly sparkled. To her brother, it was a sign that the switch to her boy-crazy mode had been flipped on. "What if Bill's friend is a vampire?" She then promptly squealed.

"Oh, come on, Mabel!"


"Hey, dudes. Mister Pines."

"Soos? You're here early."

"Soos! About time!" Stan hollered. "I need you to put up some signs that says, 'No teenaged pranksters allowed'. Look at what they did to me!"

The Shack's handyman stepped inside. "You hit your foot on something, Mister Pines?"

"Damn right, I did! And it's because a bunch o' kids who got up too early decided to mess with me. Well, they'll see what's coming..."

"I'll get to it, Mister Pines. Can I talk to my bros first?"

Stan waved his hand as the morning entertainment began. "Yeah, yeah. Just be quick about it. I want that sign before nine."

"What's up, Soos?" Dipper began.

Soos waved back. He then drew out and unfolded a scribbled piece of paper from his back pocket. "I think someone stole your diary. Though, I don't really recall you having a diary. Or is that thing with the number on it your diary?"

"It's not." Dipper hastily took the page. What is this? If he was puzzled over this morning's note, this new one disturbed him. "And this isn't mine. Where'd you find it?"

"It was taped on the outhouse."

"Really?" Mable grabbed it excitedly. Her smile quickly faded. "Whoa. This is creepy."

"Soos! The sign?"

"On it, Mister Pines! Got to go, dudes." With that, the handyman skipped away to the break room to collect his tools.

"Dipper! Go cut up some more logs. We need wood for the sign and the relics!"

The boy groaned. But before he could begin to protest, he felt a tug at his vest. He noticed Waddles on the floor, nibbling at his sister's sock.

"Yeah, Mabel?" The atmosphere between them quickly changed the moment he looked at her. Dipper grabbed her shoulders, trying to read her gaze. At first it was confusion. Then horror. He realized that she wasn't even looking directly at him. "Mabel? Mabel, what is it? Mabel, come on, you're creeping me out here. Mabel!"


Outside, Wendy twisted the keys and hopped out of the golf cart, catching Mabel's gaze through the kitchen window. She waved then stopped. It didn't take long for the fear on the little girl's face to register on the teen.

Wendy Corduroy turned around.


The Pine twins both watched the figure disappear into the woods, glimpsing only a pitch black suit and tie. Wendy, though, felt her heart stop when she glanced at his—

He doesn't have a face.

She stared. He doesn't have a face.

Her blood ran cold at the thought of it. Just as she felt numb, the next thought that her brain processed made it much worse. What was supposed to be a boredom-induced myth turned out to be real the whole time. Behind her came the frantic muffled cries from the Mystery Shack kitchen. By then, she knew what they were screaming at her to do.

Run...

She ran inside and bolted the lock.


NOTE: I don't intend to continue this. I just want to get this off my chest so I can concentrate on other things. Like continuing my other fics, studying, and playing Fallout: New Vegas. (Then again, balancing Fallout and school is much like mixing oil with water.)