Warning, this story was made for one purpose only… to have a western in the vicinity of Detective Conan. Idiotic I know, and ironic. I mean come on, it's a WESTERN! Yep, that's why I'm doing this, be prepared!

Across the desert of New Mexico you can see the lonely prints of a single soul and his horse (or at least what can be presumed as a horse), the lazy shadows of the earth in the morning painting a canvas of yellows and purples across the landscape. Shadows stitched across the mesas, the ranger has appeared, his shadow portraying the very essence of manliness. The sand of the desert kicks up against his animal's heels, creating small clouds of dust in the early morning. Upon the creature is a tall, dark-skinned man, scars cascading across his face and hands portraying untold stories, undoubtedly of his manly acts.

Moving forward, the man and his steed edge forward and see a small village in a vividly colored canyon, purples and blues coating not only the canyon but the town within its premises. The hero of our story, decided upon this small town to be the one in which he would settle, and bless with his presence of manliness. He approached the mouth of the town and canyon, looking around to scope out the area.

"Yes, indeed this will be the place." He said to himself. He centered himself squarely in front of the mouth of the town so all inhabitants could see him, and that he would indeed be these poor creatures savior. He was doing them a favor by gracing them with his presence.

Whispers were heard of, "Who is this man?" and "Where is he from?" Finally a small boy spoke up from amongst the whisperings, asking the inevitable question a young boy would ask of a manly hero.

"What are you riding?" The young boy questioned.

As if shot through the heart he stumbled backwards, "Why would you EVER ask such a question!" He yelled at the boy. "Cannot you see that this is a Japanese Serow! Only the finest of men receive one of these from overseas!"

"Sure looks like it doesn't fit you much." The boy persisted. Silly boy, doubting our fair (and manly) hero!

"I am taken aback! Emperor Saki is a perfect size for me, a genuine steed!" Our hero retorted. The ill-advised child rolled his eyes and simply walked back into the crowd. Everyone visible in the town then went back to their work, paying no mind the crusader who stood in their mist.

"Don't you want to know who I am? Since after all I DO have this narrator!" He yelled. Hey, wait! Don't break the fourth wall (in a manly fashion)!

"I can if I want, I'm the hero!" Whatever. Continuing on, the people of the town turned to him and asked his name, after all, they could sense he would be around a while.

"Heiji Hattori, greatest cowboy in the west!" The people who had given him a little bit of the benefit of the doubt, returned to their work, feeling that their obligation to be friendly had been fulfilled.

Our dark-skinned hero looked about the small town in hopes to find one of two things, a Sheriff's office or a bar. Finding the latter first, he brushed off his dirtied boots and made his way across the street to "One-Eyed Pete's Bar" conveniently located but a few buildings down from where he stood.

He stepped onto the front porch of the building; the walls were obviously in poor condition, roughly patched in spots that had clearly come from previous bar fights. He stretched forward a hand to push open the roughened door from many years of use.

As he walked in all eyes were on him, just the way he liked it. He scanned the room for an empty seat, finding one at a table with rough-and-tumble guys. Upon reaching the table the guys scooted chairs, blocking Heiji from entering that chair. Now Heiji was not about to give up sitting at this table, he was after all Heiji Hattori! The son of a great crime fighter.

He proceeded to the other side of the table where there was still an empty chair, resulting from the earlier shuffling of seats. Beginning to lower himself into the chair a large man sat, narrowly missing sitting on him. "Hey!" He yelled, "What were ya thinking, almost sitting on me!" The man who had sat down once again rose up to his full height, a full three heads or more, higher than our hero.

"Something you need to say to me?" He asked, cracking his burly hands to express his willingness to fight.

"Yes!" his hot-blooded temperament swinging into full throttle. Heiji snapped, a single light shining upon him, adding drama to the scene. "Let's be settilin' this old fashioned way…" He then did some fancy foot work, in a sort of tap-dance routine. "Through dance!"

The burly man grabbed his collar, "Let's not." He said, heightening his fist above the strong-willed Heiji. The spotlight disappeared from around him with a loud snap as if a light switch was being turned off. Smoke and dust started barreling in from under the door, a bar fight was about to begin and Heiji could feel it.

As if magnetized, everyone in the bar's head turned towards an unknown source, and silence filled the area. Loud sounds of stepping filled the room as a stunning woman appeared in lovely saloon garb, a violet feather perched in her dark hair, piled in a curled up-do. Her hands were on her hips and a familiar accent came out of her mouth. "Just what do ya think yer doin'? Ya don't really think you'll be gettin' away with a fight in this here bar do ya?" The burly man promptly dropped him (being Heiji), backing away. "good, now it's best ya be a' skirtin' away." She said, flicking her wrist at the ruffians.

She then proceed to link arms with our protagonist, and pull him out of the saloon. Many "Oohs!" were heard as they go out under the patio of the saloon. "What are ya tryin' to do, tanglin' with Bethany!" Heiji then began to laugh.

"His name's Bethany!" He then laughed harder. "What kinda name is that?" She then proceeded to firmly whack him on the head.

"Are ya tryin' to make enemies of the people here?"

"Nah, the names jus' hilarious!" She raised her fist above his head, getting ready to give another lump if need be. He promptly stopped. He then and there decided to let her talk.

"Now, I heard yer name's Heiji Hattori, I know you think yer big stuff, but I'm gunna tell you right now, this town WILL change yer opinion. You'll fall in love with this town, and people here are never what they seem. I recommend y'all learn to be humble real quick or y'all be learnin' it the hard way."

"Ma lady," Heiji bowed to the young lady of about 18, "I am but yer humble servant." He then kissed her hand, and rose.

A frying was pulled out of mid-air, as if by magic, "Now get the heck outta my bar or you'll be havein' a 'technical' relationship with this here fryin' pan." She patted the skillet lovingly. Heiji simply stared.

"Yer givin' me advice then ya chase me off, threaten' me with your fryin' pan if I come back. What ARE ya thinkin' woman!" He then turned to walk off the porch. Suddenly a strong force attacked his side, grabbing his arm. He was about to give whatever had latched onto his arm a good talking to but found it to be the bar maid. She then gingerly gave him a kiss on the cheek, causing him to blush. Though he was a solid gold (and manly) hero, he had never been kissed by a (a womanly) lady. All others had been frightened by his tough exterior, she saw through him. This was a terrifying thought to Heiji.

"What's yer name miss?" He asked.

"Kazuha, and that's what you'll call me, er else." She shook her pan, then smiled.

"Man," Heiji said to himself "Girls er confusin.'" With that he walked out of the saloon's vicinity and went down to the sheriff's office.

Heiji stood in front of the Sheriff's office, sensing something was off. As he stood closer to the office, he smelt an unmistakable smell, beer. Why was that smell, of all the smells coming from the Sheriff's office of all places? The heels of his boots clicked against the wood on the patio as he pushed open the door to the office being hit with the smell of alcohol. "Ew! Did I mistake this place fer the bar?" Heiji announced as he walked in.

A man who wore a over-sized cowboy hat sat in an old chair, reading the local news and circling in red who was due to win the tortoise races on Sunday. The area was littered with alcoholic beverages of all kinds across the room. He looked up at the presence of another human in the room. "What do YOU want?" he asked.

"Um, I…"

"If you're lookin' to find the local criminals, go back there and ask assistant deputy Shinichi."

"Okay…" Heiji said as he backed off toward the room the very drunk Sheriff had pointed to. As he walked towards to room a gorgeous girl of about 18 walked past him, brushing against his 'fancy' cowboy suit. She was decked out in a light blue dress, she looked like the daughter of a wealthy land owner, but he knew it wasn't so.

"Oh! Pardon me!" She squeaked as she headed into the room the sheriff was in. Heiji paused and turned around to see what she would do next.

She scanned the room and firmly planted her hands on her hips, something was going down and Heiji looked on in eager anticipation.

"Dad! What on this planet happened! I leave for a measly 2 minutes and you trash the joint!"

"But Ran! I jus drank a lil hick."

"Yes, well your very appalling presence and VERY red face tell me otherwise, your drunk and you know it! Last time you did this you needed to go out to investigate a cattle ranch problem and you were drunk as a stump, poor Shinichi had to brand you to get you out of your state!"

"Yea, and I still have a red mark…" He said rubbing his bum.

"You DESERVED it! Now go sleep it off in your room, I'll bring you a bucket for when you get your hangover." She lifted him out of her seat and put his arm around her shoulder balancing his full bodyweight on her shoulder. She turned to the current spectator of Heiji. "Sorry you had to see that, my father is quite a quack of a sheriff, spending all of our money gambling and for alcohol. Shinichi's around back, I think he's reading. If I could trouble you with a little more?" She asked looking directly at Heiji and rebalancing her father on her shoulders.

"Sure." He said in his manliest voice, trying to sound, shall we say handsome?

"Tell Shinichi supper will be done in a few minutes and there's apple pie, I know it's his favorite. So make sure he knows, it might motivate him to be on time. Ever the mystery fanatic." She sighed in frustration and then proceeded to lug her father to his room.

Stepping outside he looked around to see a lanky, yet handsome young man kicking a ball in all kinds of ways he never would have dreamed a ball could be kicked. Over his head and under, up, down, and even rolling it in all sort of weird directions.

"Hey!" He called to who was presumably Shinichi. He stopped kicking the foot ball and headed over to where she stood. He was ruddy and panting from his previous workout. His hair bounced as he ran over to Heiji to greet him. His presence reeked of optimism and it annoyed Heiji to think how he would talk and act.

"Hey there," He said gripping Heiji in a firm handshake and grinned a boyish grin. He was crushing his had as if he was in a hand wrestling competition only he knew about. He finally let go a few seconds later. "Name's Shinichi Kudo, nicknames Jimmy but Lord knows why they gave me that nickname!" He laughed a hearty laugh. "What are you doin' around these neck of the woods, you wouldn't happen to be um…" He paused for a moment, "Heiji Hattori now would you?

"The one and only!" Heiji said, positively beaming. "Finally," He thought to himself "some one remembers my name."

"Well, I welcome you to the town, but I bet cha that you weren't welcomed very warmly. Don't blame the towns people, their just apathetic towards new comers, you see for some reason every new comer to this town gets carried off by bandits, not sure why though." He scratched the back of his scalp. "I've been researching for the longest time but whenever they appear a shootout occurs between me and them, someone usually ends up dead." He frowned. "Those poor souls," He said to himself. "Anyway, it's been my goal to bring them down, fortunately we've got an inside gal, a sister of one of the past members of our town who went to the big city to look for better education. She should be sending us a report any day now!"

"I won't be carried off!" Heiji said persistently. "Cause I'm…"

"Yeah, yeah, I know the manly Heiji Hattori. Bottom line you're new, will you be bait for the bandits?"

"Um, well I'd prefer to help you solve this problem…"

"Well that will be just dandy, say, do have any, you know, abilities?" He asked, his hand on his shoulder, pressuring him for an answer.

"I can use a sword pretty well…"

"Fantastic, now, I believe Ran will be calling us for some supper, sure hope she doesn't decide to make that corn chowder again. I love her food but after a week it gets old."

"She said for me to mention that she baked an apple pie." Heiji said.

He paused for a moment as a grin spread across his face. "She remembered! Oh man I love that woman!" Heiji just looked at him questioningly.

"We made a deal that if her father could go without drinking for a week I would have to make a meal, but if he gave in and drank some of that awful liquor she would make me an Apple pie. Guess he gave in, he was soo close too! Tomorrow she would have won." He turned to Heiji, "Would you like to join us?"

"Well I don't want to intrude…"

"Oh it's no big deal, Ran loves company!" He beamed, as he showed Heiji into the house. As Heiji sat down next to Shinichi, Kazuha from the bar appeared. She looked stunned then recovered her cool demeanor.

"How did you end up here?" She asked, being careful not to make eye contact.

"I was talking to Shinichi and he invited me for supper. You?"

"I eat dinner at the Mori's every Tuesday, it's just my normal routine, guess I showed up on the right night." She laughed. "Apple pie!"

"You can thank me for that." Shinichi boasted.

"Hey, watch it! Next time the stakes will be higher and I'll win!" She called from the kitchen as she carried out a large hot bowl of chili.

"Okay," Shinichi said, "what's the bargain this time?"

Ran sat down and pondered a moment. "If you bring down the bandit's this next time, you have to… propose to me!"

"Hey isn't that a loose - loose for me!"

"Yes… fine if you don't, you do, and if you do, you don't." She replied.

"Now wait, wait," Heiji said putting his hands up in a 'I surrender' pose, "What's this about proposals?"

Ran and Shinichi were oddly silent as a blush ran across both of their faces. Kazuha spoke up for them. "They've been friends since childhood and seems how they're both 18, their marryin' age. However, their both too shy about each other to have anyone make a move. Ran's been very open about it, but since she's the girl she can't do anything."

"It's a deal!" Shinichi said. And so the wager was set in place and dinner progress with friendly chatter, carefully avoiding the subject of their deal, all getting ready for tomorrow's untold events that would inevitably roll the dice of fate, and cast a lot, most everyone involved would hate.