I don't own Degrassi, nor Coldplay's song Violet Hill. Awesome song to listen to while reading this(:

The cold wind was watering her eyes. She had a clear view of the city, the sun sinking into its buildings. In the distance she could hear birds singing happy tunes. Happy. She hasn't been happy in so long. Ever since she screwed everything up. Ever since she lost him.

Even though it sounded so cliché, he was her world. Without him, that world crumbles. Nothing was she worth.

Parents divorced, her mother rarely home, her sister Darcy she never heard from. Ali was always spending time with her new love interest, Josh.

She had no one when she was down, so why live?

She was just a poor little thing that took up space. Even though they say it gets better, she knows her chances are thin. What if it doesn't get better? What if you hold on to that little piece of hope and nothing changes? You've just delayed your suicide for a little longer, allowing life to torture every part of your mind completely. Allowing memories to creep up a little more frequently to sadden you. Welcoming more and more distraught thoughts to fog your mind body and scars that lay forever, flawing those white silky thighs, once a secret, but will be revealed soon enough.

She breathes in the cool air slowly walking closer to the grassy edge.

Just promise you'll never leave me.

I don't know who I am anymore!

DID YOU EVER LOVE ME AT ALL?

Wetness falls down her face. She is ready. She can feel that its time, now or never. Looking up into the sky, she notices faint stars that would be unseen by anyone else. It was still daylight.

When the time is near, you notice the small

things in life. You dream about how life would be without you there. You fantasize about "accidentally" taking too many pills. You don't care to look either way when you cross the street. You welcome death in.

When looking over the edge, she saw couples together - some with children. She wishes that's what she could have. She wishes someone could pull her away from her attempt and tell her its okay, that everything is alright. She wants to cry out on their shoulder until her head hurts. Shes been through so much and no one cared to ask her how she felt. She's just too fragile. She wishes someone could

do that, but this is no happy ending for her. No one is going to sweep her off her feet and make everything better. No. She kicked off her flats and took another breath.

Jump! Her insides screamed.

JUST GET IT OVER WITH. YOU MEAN NOTHING TO HIM NOW!

Her heart ached. She finally jumped, a small smile evident on her face. She may be smiling, but we all know on the inside she was breaking. Her soul ripping out of her body. Her heart was jumping in her chest. She was scared, but this was the only way to make things better for herself and others.

You would have thought that while plummeting to your death, youd have flashbacks clouding your mind. You'd have close people to you fill your head. You'd remember happy times. The only thing she could register was how fast she was going to splat on the ground. She wanted her last words to fall out. She didn't have to comb her brain for the words to come out. She wouldn't have the time anyway. She knew what to say, and she yelled at the top of her lungs

Goodbye my love.

Half a second later her body hit the green ground. Her mind went black. Silence took over. Her heartbeat slowing down.

I took my love down to violet hill and there we sat on the snow. All that time she was silent still.

If only she knew a certain someone witnessed it all.

If only she knew how fast he ran by to where she was, and broke down on his knees.

If only she knew he held her hand the entire 911 call, and begged for her to stay with him.

If only he knew it may be too late.

So if you love me, won't you let me know?

If you love me, won't you let me know?

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First one-shot, but if you'd like, I can turn it into a chapter story. (:

Im very happy about this one. I poured out my feelings. I've been having a hard time getting over someone. Its been so long, and I still replay the time I screwed up. I wish I could have changed the situation. I could have, but I was stupid. But life goes on I guess. R&R, it would mean a lot to me.

~Julianna