Bleach: Truth or Dare
Moonwisp: Hello from your favorite TV show host, Moonwisp! Welcome to the new hit TV show: Bleach: Truth or Dare! Before we start, let's do the disclaimer! The show is yours, Yamamoto!
Yamamoto: Moonwisp does not own Bleach.
Moonwisp: …That was too to the point. Take it away, Shunsui!
Shunsui: Moonwisp doesn't own Bleach! Isn't that right, my lovely Nanao-chan? I'm sure that if Moonwisp owned Bleach then you would have been my girlfriend by now.
*THWACK*
Shunsui: Yare, yare Nanao-chan! You wound me!
Nanao: I think you'll be fine Kyoraku-taicho.
Moonwisp: Alright! I think that's enough sexual tension for the disclaimer.
*THWACK*
Moonwisp: …Ow. I now know what it feels like to be Shunsui. Anyway, here's the game! Members of the audience can give any of the Gotei 13, Ichigo's friends, or Tousen, Gin, and Aizen, a truth or a dare. The only rule is that the questions aren't M rated! Let's get started! *points to audience member*
Audience Member: Ichigo, truth or dare?
Ichigo: Dare. I'm not afraid of anything.
Audience Member: Fight Zaraki!
Yachiru: *peeks over Zaraki's shoulder* Yay! Ichi, it's time to play with Kenny again!
Zaraki: I've been waiting, Ichigo! Let's fight!
Ichigo: *trembling* Look, a distraction!
*everyone looks*
Yachiru: Where's Ichi-nii?
Rukia: *points out the window* He's running away! So much for not being afraid of anything.
Moonwisp: Ok, well, I guess we'll have to go on without Ichigo. Next truth or dare! *points to another audience member*
Audience Member: Kyouraku, truth or dare?
Shunsui: Truth!
Audience Member: Do you actually love Nanao?
Shunsui: Why, of course! How could I not love my sweet, lovely Nanao-chan?
*THWACK*
Shunsui: Nanao-chan! Why do you never believe me?
Nanao: Taicho, you flirt with anything wearing a skirt.
*everyone mumbles in agreement*
Shunsui: *pouts* Someday you will believe me!
Moonwisp: Ok! Who's next? *points at audience member*
Audience Member: Yumichika, truth or dare?
Yachiru: Hey! Isn't that Cue Ball?
Ikkaku: STOP CALLING ME THAT!
Yachiru: Why are you down there, Baldy!
Ikkaku: Don't call me that either! And because I wanted to be.
Moonwisp: *impatiently* TRUTH OR DARE?
Yumichika: Dare, because truths are not beautiful enough.
Moonwisp: *mumbles* That doesn't make any sense…
Ikkaku: I dare you…to take off those eye feathers!
Yumichika: No! It will lessen my infinite beauty!
Moonwisp: *mumbles* Does Yumichika ever make sense?
Ikkaku: You have to!
Yumichika: Ichigo didn't do his dare!
Moonwisp: *slyly* Ichigo will have a punishment on the next show.
Yumichika: *gulps* Fine. *takes off eye feathers*
Moonwisp: Who's next?
Audience Member: Toshiro, truth or dare?
Toshiro: Dare. And it's Hitsugaya-taicho.
Audience Member: Ok, Toshiro.
Toshiro: …
Audience Member: Take off your shirt.
Toshiro: *eye twitches but takes off shirt anyway*
Rangiku: Damn taicho! You got some sexy abs! Don't you agree, Momo?
Momo: *blushes*
Toshiro: MATSUMOTO!
Fangirls: WE LOVE YOU TOSHIRO!
Toshiro: *eye twitches even more*
Moonwisp: Time for another truth or dare! Toshiro...you can put your shirt back on.
Toshiro: Arigato. *puts shirt back on*
Moonwisp: Go ahead, little girl in the front row.
Little Girl: Omaeda, why are you in the Stealth Force!
Omaeda: Isn't it obvious? I'm stealthy and super-fast! *shunpoes around the room in circles*
Soi Fon: *sticks foot out*
Omaeda: *trips over Soi Fon's foot and falls flat on his face*
Soi Fon: Not to mention, clumsy.
*everyone snickers*
Moonwisp: Poor, poor Omaeda. Next!
Audience Member: Yamamoto, truth or dare?
Yamamoto: Truth. I am far too lazy and useless for a dare.
Audience Member: Why the hell are you so ripped?
Yamamoto: When I was younger, I used to do IT a lot to build up my muscles.
*everyone's except Byakuya's mouth drops*
Audience Member: You did IT? That's how you built up your muscles?
Yamamoto: Yes. For hours and hours on end. I especially liked doing IT with my zanpakutou. It was quite pleasurable.
*Byakuya's mouth drops*
Sasakibe: *whispers what everyone else thinks IT is to Yamamoto*
Yamamoto: You young people have such dirty minds! IT is an abbreviation for Intense Training!
Everyone: Oh!
Moonwisp: Wow. That was…intense! HA! Get it?
*crickets*
Moonwisp: *clears throat awkwardly* Next truth or dare.
Audience Member: Rangiku, truth or dare?
Rangiku: I am the gossip queen, so it's only fitting that I should do truth!
Audience Member: How did you feel when Gin left?
Rangiku: I…I...I… *eyes begin to water*
Gin: *walks over to Rangiku* 'S ok, Rangiku.
Rangiku: *slaps Gin* What do you mean it's ok? You're the reason I'm crying! The reason I've drunk myself into oblivion every day since you left!
Gin: Ya don't have ta hit so hard ya know.
Rangiku: Yes I do! I have to! All because I just had to fall in love with you before you went and betrayed Soul Society! *eyes widen* Did I really just say that?
Gin: *embraces Rangiku in a hug* Yep, ya did. But I'm glad ya did. 'Cause I love ya too.
*everyone smiles*
Moonwisp: What a cute 'Aww!' moment!
Rangiku: *smiles* That means a lot to me, Gin. Arigato. Now, let's go.
Gin: Where're we goin'?
Rangiku: You're going to explain to me EXACTLY why you betrayed Soul Society and what you are going to do to make it up to us. And then you are going to time-out for being naughty.
Gin: Ooh, time-out. I like the sound of that.
Rangiku *giggles* Let's go.
*Rangiku and Gin wander off the stage holding hands*
Moonwisp: *sniffles* I just love happy endings. Who wants to do the next truth or dare?
Audience Member: *stands up* Byakuya, truth or dare?
Byakuya: Dare.
Audience Member: I dare you to take off everything you are wearing except your underwear, stand in the center of the stage, do the chicken dance, and scream the lyrics to the chicken dance.
Byakuya: Scatter, Senbonzak-
Moonwisp: Now, now, Byakuya, don't hurt the audience. If you hurt them or don't do the dare there will be a punishment. One worse than the dare that you got.
Byakuya: *strips except for his underwear, goes to center stage, and begins the chicken dance* I don't wanna be a chicken! I don't wanna be a duck! So I shake my butt! I don't wanna be a chicken! I don't wanna be a duck! So I shake my butt! I don't wanna be a chicken! I don't wanna be a duck! So I shake my butt! I don't wanna be a chicken! I don't wanna be a duck! So I shake my butt!
*everyone is silent then erupts with laughter and clapping*
Moonwisp: Good job, Byakuya! Well that's all the time we have tonight, folks! If you want to see a truth or a dare on the show, please leave your idea in a review with the character's name, whether it's a truth or dare, and your idea. You can also review just because you want to! Byakuya, do you know what will happen to people who don't review?
Byakuya: No…
Moonwisp: A bag of candy will be tied to their butt and I will point Yachiru in their direction!
Byakuya: *eyes widen slightly*
Moonwisp: I hope that helps motivate everyone to review! I'll see you next time on Bleach: Truth or Dare! Have a good night!
A/N: Normally, I won't have author's notes, but I need to put one this time. I am posting polls up in my profile for pairings. Voting will end Tuesday, June 21. I will have a say in the pairings, which may affect the results. Also, I will be without a computer until June 20 (I think), so I apologize ahead of time for not posting very quickly. Once I get my computer back, the fic will be in full swing, so don't worry! Thanks for reading!
