A Leap of Faith
Disclaimer: More appreciation for the amazingly complex and lovely character that is Miyano Shiho please, thank you. She still rightfully belongs to Gosho though. I own nothing here but my lame plot ideas.
Prompt: Trust
Setting: Days or weeks maybe? before Shiho is introduced as Haibara Ai in canon.
Summary: When she wanted death and death said no, Miyano Shiho only had the name of a human subject she could trust, "Kudo Shinichi".
"What?" Shiho's shock and sharp voice surprised even herself.
"Your sister passed away a few hours ago. My condolences, Sherry." The woman bowed and walked out, the door to her lab closing with a click.
While left alone in her lab, she sighed and flopped on to her office chair. She crossed her arms on her desk, pretending to nap for the security cameras. When actually it was to hide the tears that dropped, the hums and beeps of her lab equipment in the background her only witnesses.
Shiho was just getting a paper cup so she could grab some coffee when she saw Gin walk in to the lounge. He walked straight to her with a smile on his face, and not one that bears good news.
"I saw your sister a while back."
"Oh?" she raised an eyebrow. He had said it so casually, like it was the most natural thing in the world that she tensed. No good comes out of someone coming across Gin. She knows that better than anyone.
He dropped a bullet into her empty paper cup, "It was a… parting gift."
Shiho shot him a glare. He smirked.
"See you around, Sherry," and he left for the car park.
As Gin walked away, Shiho turned her attention back to the bullet inside the cup. Disgusted, she crushed it and threw the whole thing in the trash.
Shiho knocked on the door to that person's office, three times, and waited for a response.
"Enter."
The room reeked of alcohol and cigar like it always does. She resisted the urge to take her hands out of her pockets and cover her mouth. She'll have to wash her lab coat again…"That person's" back was to her, but she took a seat in one of the office chairs as she waited.
"How may I help you Sherry?"
"I want to know why Gin killed my sister."
"Your sister and Gin? I'm sorry, how did you –"
"It doesn't matter how I found out, does it? Why did my sister die?" She mouthed a continuation, but closed her mouth immediately. That was just a bit too rash, even for her… She needs to stay composed… She breathed in and counted to three.
"I'm afraid I cannot disclose that. Even if it's you, Sherry."
Shiho clinched her fists, "I understand. Thank you."
Shiho breathed and counted her breaths again until she got back to her lab. It was safe there, somewhat. At the very least, she was alone.
Alone in every sense of the word. Akemi was the only person she'd trusted with her emotions and feelings. They can take anything – her freedom, her expertise, her life – from her, not her sister. Why, her sister?
"Nee-chan…" she slid down and sat on the floor, only the dash of salt to her lips did she realise she had cried. Instead of hiding it this time, she let the tears fall. Let them all see it.
A few days later, she went to that person again.
"I want to ask again, what happened to my sister?"
"My answer is the same as last time. It's confidential information that I cannot disclose to you, Sherry."
"Confidential? She was my sister! I think I deserve a proper explanation for –"
"That person" put their hand up, and looked at her apologetically, "I'm sorry Sherry, but I'll have to ask you to leave."
Shiho stormed back to her lab, not even bothering to bow before she walked out of "that person's" office, her heels clicking in the wake and her lab coat flapping from the long strides. Her sister was all she had, they know this. They know this and yet they won't give her an answer to her simple question, "why".
She closed the door to her lab, panning over her years of youth spent away in this room. Alone.
"You are to carry on the research your father had done for us. Unfortunately, not all data and records could be salvaged from the fire, these memo discs are all that we could manage to restore."
Shiho stops herself before she can continue the thought. Her mind made up, she plops in to her chair, and keys in a few commands on her computer. If they can't trust her enough to even explain Akemi's death to her, then she has no reason to trust them with her research either.
"Wait! Where are you taking that person?"
"A trial. Experiment of sorts." her assistant held up one of her Apotoxin pills, eyes shining with excitement. It spooked her.
"You know the Apotoxin has only been tested on mice, who made the green light on human subjects? The Apotoxin is still in its early stages of –"
"It will be fine, Sherry."
The man's screams and groans lasted for five minutes. Until there was dead silence. She closed her eyes and walked away.
Not long after Shiho enforced a halt to her research did they come knocking. She was checking on the latest batch of Apotoxin when the door to her lab was knocked three times.
That was quick, even for them. She snuck an Apotoxin into her pocket before she muttered, "Come in."
"Please come with us Sherry."
"Where are you taking me?" she made sure to look at all of them, blinking her eyes a few more times than usual and feigning innocence. It's something she's gotten really good at living her days here.
"We were asked not to say anything to you, miss," one of the men broke out of line, handcuff in hand. She was not surprised, though it did make the message clear to her – she will die.
Shiho followed quietly the rest of the way, the shuffle of her guards' feet and the click of her heels echoing through the hallways and stairs they have taken. After turning three lefts and two flights of stairs and a right, they got her to what seems to be a spare room. It was cold, not to mention empty. The room was cleaned recently but it still had a faint tint of dust. The handrail was the one odd thing that stood out to her. It gleamed when the lights turned on. The only new object in the otherwise grey and desolate room. Her life for the next… How ever long they decide to keep her alive.
The click and clang of the handcuff broke her out of her thoughts, one of the men that took her had locked the other handcuff to the handrail, "Until you are willing to continue the research you are to remain here until a decision's been made. That person's orders."
Still what she expected, she smirked, finally giving the guard a good look in the eye, "Well, you can tell that person that until I know why my sister died, I'm not doing anything."
"Then you will wait here until that person has reached a decision, Sherry."
The door to the empty room closed. And then, she was alone. She tried to feel the Apotoxin in her pocket. Just to check.
Shiho isn't sure how many nights have gone by warming herself up with her free arm, or waking up to a stiff shoulder. They have been kind enough to give her food, but she doesn't need to show anymore weakness or accept anymore sympathy, real or fake, from them. Today felt like the right day. She took out the Apotoxin, admiring the handiwork of her childhood spent here a final, longing look. Then closed her eyes and steadied her breathing.
"Nee-chan, I still don't think –"
"You don't worry a thing about me! Everything is going smoothly!" giving her a wink, "as for you Shiho, I think it's time you got yourself a boyfriend!"
"Nee-chan!"
"Don't always close yourself off in the labs! Meet some guys alright?"
Shiho opens her eyes and murmured, "Nee-chan…"
Taking one last breath, she swallowed the Apotoxin. Prepared to greet death with a smile.
At first it burned. She tried to contain her screams but it hurt. It hurt so much. Her bones felt like they are stretched and torn before its put back together again.
Her mind suddenly went back to that list of human subjects… Is this how all of them felt in their last moments…?
Then everything went black.
Shiho jolted up, how long have I been unconscious? Beads of sweat dripped down her hair, and her clothes no longer fit her. Though she lifted her left hand and that it's free from the handcuff.
"I'm… not dead," she pulled a dry smile. It would've been better if death took her.
Everything looked larger than it was before, not just her clothes.
"Body of a child…"
It was one of the hypothesis in her research, though never proven. Except –
"Kudo Shinichi. Status: Death."
The investigation team searched his bookshelves, but from the order of those books it seems it still was the same as a month before. As Shiho looked in his drawers, the one she remembered that had the clothes from his childhood days, "Eh?"
"Did you find anything Sherry?"
"There's nothing here."
"What?"
"His clothes are gone. Clothes from when he was a kid."
"Well, now that he's dead the family probably saw no use of those clothes anymore right. OK, everyone! I think we're done here!"
Shiho took a last glance at the drawer before she left with the team, her mind going to back to that one mouse that had successfully turned young again. And Kudo Shinichi.
She needs to find Kudo Shinichi. Fast. She can't possibly go through where they had taken her. Rolling the door out of her options, she catches a garbage chute right in the corner of the room. Seeing it as her chance of escape, she grabs all her clothes, wrapping them all up before covering herself with her lab coat. Her heels are now too big, but she grabs them anyway. Making sure to not leave anything behind. She takes one last glance at the grey room again before she slides down to the world outside.
The rain hit her first, then the chill that pierced. Still a little feverish, she began running in the direction of Beika Street. There was still a bit of light despite the rain, as soon as she spotted a trash can, she dumped all that was of "Sherry" away, her heels, her clothes… Not her lab coat though. Let them find it. Let them think I'm dead.
Then she ran. As fast as her seven-year-old-legs can take her to the Kudo residence.
Kudo Shinichi…
She doesn't have anyone now…. He's the only person she can trust and is alive, hopefully… She expects some anger and shouting, but… nothing she can do about that, once he learns who she is, what she is. Shaking her head to focus on getting herself to the right alleyway and lanes, she looks at the road ahead.
Shiho doesn't know how long she's been running, the streetlights have flickered on. She can feel a fever coming as she gasped and panted. Finally slowing to a halt at the black gates. The name "Kudo" embellished on the bricks.
She tried to reach for the doorbell but her vision blurred and her knees gave. Darkness welcomed her once again.
A/N: I think I had too much fun with BO-Shiho that this wasn't really all about "trust" or remotely CoAi hey? Welp. I don't know if Shiho is still Shiho either, sorry. As always, how was the drabble? Too short? Just right? Hated? Loved it? Let me know your thoughts! ^^
