One Small Irken…… Will Be The Doom of Us All.

By Devil of the Ice

Chapter One: Hail, Plans and Dumb Ideas

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Sizz Lorr Growled as he put the space ship into hyper drive. Once Zim was recaptured, he would redefine the word 'pain'. The next foodening wouldn't begin for a few more years, but he was going to get his vacation this time. He was going to find Zim.

Throwing the ship into gear, the ship took off for the milky way.

-

"And then, by using this stuffed bunny, it will clog the machinery, activating the device to spread killer nanobots throughout the planet." Zim smiled smugly while holding a fluffy, fat bunny in one hand, which was very much alive.

The Tallest just stared disbelievingly at him before going back to eating cupcakes. They ended the transmission without a second thought.

"Do you think it will work?" Purple asked Red.

"Nope."

-

"The Tallest seemed rather impressed about my newest plan to conquer this dirt ball!" Zim said leaning back into his chair.

"No they didn't." Gir butted in.

"SILENCE!"

"It's raining guppies!" Gir randomly shouted. "Oink, Oink, Oink!"

"Huh?" Zims antenna perked.

Listening carefully, he heard tiny thumping sounds. It did sound like little guppies falling on the roof.

"Wait here, Gir. I'm going to go see was going on."

As soon as he reached the living room, the thumping had gotten louder. He stopped as soon as he caught sight of the window.

Small white balls were falling from the sky. It seemingly defied all laws of physics.

"W-what is this?" Slowly moving closer to the window, Zim looked outside. "It looks kind of like snow…"

"Computer. Analyze this."

"It's Hail." The computer answered tiredly. "You know, like snow? Only harder and not as pretty. It's just frozen rain."

"This planet is so weeeiiird. Why does it do that?"

"Insufficient data."

"I suppose this burns me as well?"

"Well…" The computer interjected. "It is water based."

"Darn it! These 'Rain Rocks' could interfere with my newest plan!"

"… It's called 'Hail'…"

"Shut up. Something must be done!"

"Yeah." The computer let out a long sigh. "Or you could wait until it stops."

"Nonsense! I'm sure I could find a faster, easier way to stop it. After all, I am an Irken Invader."

-

"Yes, your safe now… Oh, but just you wait. I will soon have enough evidence to convince the world of your secret. Then who will be laughing, Zim?!?"

Dib sat at his desk, writing on a piece of lined paper.

"Let's see…" Holding a diagram of a crudely drawn Irken, Dib went over what he knew.

1: Irken Antenna are highly sensitive, capable of sensing a vibration from thirty feet away. Found that out the hard way.

2: Irken Eye's are resistant to intense light. Strangely, they seem attracted to powder blue lights. Note: Look into idea of giant, powder blue Bug Zapper.

3: Irken blood is blue. Is there a connection between their blood and their attraction to blue light? Is it possible that Zim is the only one attracted to blue light? Need more test subjects to find out for sure.

4: Zims eating habits is akin to that of an Ant as well as his behavior, although his looks peg him as more of a cricket. Note: Find out if Zim chirps.

5: If Zim is a bug-like creature, why doesn't he have an exoskeleton? On close inspection, Zims 'skin' is actually tiny scales pact together. Irken Insect/Reptile hybrid? Or Insect/Fish hybrid? Maybe neither?

6: Weaknesses: Water and germs. Stupidity and incompetence in Zims case…

"Maybe I'll get more information when I catch and dissect Zim."

Laying his scythe crested head on the desk, Dib went to sleep. The future would yield more answers.

-

Lard Narr stared at the piece of paper. It was in the middle of the circular room on a metal desk, nothing too unusual about that. He was nervous about reading it and for good reason. A crazed Vortian had opened up a time portal in the middle of his ship and flung a paper airplane at him, then dashed back into the spinning hole cackling madly.

So there was a couple of reasons he was nervous about it.

"This could be the answer!" Narr argued with himself. "The answer to the Irken empires downfall! But… I'm scared. WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!"

After calming down from the outburst he took a few steps forward and poked the paper with a stick. Nothing happened. So he poked it again. After a few minutes of poking and nothing happening, he decided to read it.

Walking to it like it was a chicken waiting to spring from the dead, Narr carefully undid its plane formation until it was flat with only a few creases.

"This!!" He yelled. "This is it! What we've needed all along!"

Holding the paper up in one hand, he screeched: "A PLAN!!!!!"

-

End of Chapter one.