A/N: Came across a funny phrase while watching "WhatTheBuckShow" on YouTube and this oneshot literally spilled out. I was in a . . . writing mood. Please read and review! Thanks!

-x-

It was a wonderful day. The snow was out and the chilly wind was blowing. The school was cancelled for the day and he was finally able to sleep in for once.

"Kyou ~ " a voice sang outside in the hallway.

Then something disturbed his peace. Growling, Kyou turned to his side, hoping that the person outside his door would get the picture that he wanted to be alone. Apparently, the thought was left on deaf ears, or in this case, deft brain.

"Kyou ~ " A door was slammed open and a rush of footsteps crossed the room to where the cat lay erected, hoping to pass off as sleeping.

The comforter was thrown off, causing a chilly breeze to brush past his bare skin,

"What the hell did you do that for, Shigure!" Kyou growled, shooting a glare at the novelist.

"You didn't answer me. For a second I believed that you really were actually sleeping, but I guess you weren't afterall. I'm bored, I want you to keep me company while Yuki and Tohru are away on a field trip," the novelist whined.

"You have that snake to bother, why not call him?" Kyou spat as he drew his comforter around him once again, relishing the warmth it rewarded him.

"Because he's busy with the shop . . . and Hari . . ." Kyou could hear the pout in the dog's voice and glared murderously at the wall,

"What about your editor? Why don't you have some private conversations with her?"

"She's annoying, always asking when I'm done with my manuscript. Doesn't she know how hard it is to write a book? Ideas don't flow out when I want them to. They just occur whenever they want, be it at a random time," the dog pouted.

"Then get another editor who will understand, sheesh always running away from her when you can easily solve the matter by firing her and getting another person who respects your needs," Kyou grumbled.

"And that's where you come in, Kyou! I want you to be my new editor, for the time being that is! I want you to make sure that I'm doing my work, it's only for today. Mii went on a vacation and she strictly informed me not to contact her in any way. So, will you do it? For your cousin whom you love so dearly?" Shigure grinned.

"Go skin a dead dog, I'm not the least bit interested," Kyou seethed and proceeded to close his eyes and shut the world out when a warm breath was at his ear,

"Should I tell Tohru about your secret obsession with her?"

"Do it, and I"ll personally see to it, that I bury you alive myself!" Kyou turned around to glare at his older cousin face-to-face.

"Yay! We'll have so much fun today!" Shigure promised.

-x-

Kyou growled at the humming noise and turned to yell at the dog but then the sight made him stop. He arched his brow as a sneer was brought upon his face,

"What in God's name are you doing, Shigure?"

"I'm fingering my glasses!" Shigure stated as he began prodding his index fingers into the holes of his glasses. He had purposely poked out the lenses of his reading glasses because he didn't really needed them to see, it was used merely for decoration.

"Fingering . . . your glasses, what are you insane? You might as well finger a foam cup and call it a woman's vagina!" Kyou shouted as he turned away from the horrific scene known to mankind.

"That's a good idea, Kyou!"

Kyou turned back wide-eyed as the novelist went to fetch a foam cup. It was official, Shigure was becoming senile at his young age. May God help him now.

OWARI