For all the Peeps
Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis.
One Shot
It was in the early hours in the morning. A stealthy figure made her way to the kitchen on a mission. Her name is Natasha Romanoff, the teen Avenger Black Widow. She opened a cabinet door and grinned,
"There you are; my beautiful, delicious…"
She pulled out a pack of marshmallow Peeps and began gorging on them. She laughed happily, not realizing that she had been making a racket as soon as she opened the package. However, most everyone was a heavy sleeper, and, in the morning, Black Widow was sprawled out on the kitchen, about a dozen marshmallow Peeps packages littering the kitchen.
Farrah Willows, the feline Avenger Persiana, walked down the stairs. She opened the fridge for some milk. She took a swig from the carton and noticed the delirious look on the Russian teen. The white-furred cat-girl shook her head,
"Man; and I thought the place was a mess after one of our fights."
She put the milk back and began cleaning up the mess. In a few minutes, Carol Danvers, the teen Avenger Miss Marvel came downstairs. She took the milk Farrah drank and poured a glass. As she sipped the milk, she spat it out just as quickly and glared at her arch-nemesis,
"You drank out of the carton again, didn't you?"
Farrah said innocently,
"Why, Barbie, whatever makes you think so?"
Carol growled,
"I just spat out a hair!"
The cat-girl shook her head,
"Lots of people have hair, Barbie. What makes you think it's mine?"
The blonde Air Force brat shouted,
"You're not the only one who drinks milk around here, Farrah! Don't you have any consideration for others?"
The white-haired lioness smiled,
"I do, Barbie. Believe me I do. I just don't have any consideration for you."
Her expression darkened,
"You're out to steal my boyfriend."
Miss Marvel shot back,
"Only because you're seducing him. Believe me, once he sees what you really are, he'll leave you for me!"
Farrah stepped closer, getting in her arch-nemesis' face,
"Hands off my man, Barbie, or I promise to finish what the aliens started."
Carol smirked,
"Bring it on, bitch!"
At this, the two went at it in another cat-fight.
Leon, the red-eyed swordsman Crisis, was walking down the stairs. He had heard the sounds of the fight and sighed,
"Those two will never stop."
He then noticed Natasha sprawled on the floor. He looked at the two fighting girls and shouted,
"HEY!"
The two rivals stopped and looked at him. Leon pointed,
"What the hell is this? You two are fighting and your teammate is hurt?"
Black Widow looked up,
"I…I'm fine, Leon."
She staggered up, but then collapsed down, smiling,
"Peeps make me happy!"
Later, in the infirmary…
One of the SHIELD doctors came in,
"Well, aside from the sugar overdose and massive headache, Natasha's going to be just fine."
The teen red-head moaned,
"My head! Someone, turn that light down!"
Simon Williams, the ionic Avenger Wonder Man, shook his head,
"What does Monica keep telling you about those marshmallow Peeps?"
Nat moaned,
"But, they're SO good! I can't have just one!"
Sam Wilson, the teen hero Falcon, shook his head,
"Nat, Simon's right. I mean, this is getting out of hand, worse than when we ran out of milk."
Hercules, the teen god of strength, shuddered,
"I remember that day, friend Falcon. Twas one of the darkest for our team."
Farrah blinked,
"I was not that bad."
T'challa, the Wakanadan prince Black Panther, shook his head,
"Farrah, you tore apart an entire supermarket to find milk. You did not have to go through every aisle."
Crystal blinked,
"Wait, what? She went up and down every aisle?"
Leon shook his head,
"No, she went through the aisles to get to the dairy section."
Carol shook her head,
"Has anyone ever told Farrah she has impulse control issues?"
The cat-girl hissed,
"I'm standing right here, Barbie."
The blonde shot back,
"Good, I'll say it louder; You have impulse control issues!"
Farrah shot back,
"At least the aliens didn't come and steal my brain, but, then again, I know a blonde air-head like you has none."
Leon looked at them,
"Ladies, not now. We have to help Nat get over her Peeps addiction."
Natasha sat up, horrified,
"No! Don't take them away!"
Simon shook his head,
"I'm sorry, Natasha. We can't let you keep doing this to yourself."
Two days later…
Natasha was suffering from Peeps withdrawal. The first few hours were near torture for the Russian teen. She was cranky, irritable, and, when she saw a fly on the wall, she took a rocket launcher and fired it, leaving a gaping hole in the wall.
After two days…Natasha was still cranky and still irritable. She started having fits where she would huddle in a corner and just start singing a Russian song in a quiet, yet frightening voice. Sam tried to approach her, but Natasha sprouted fangs and jumped the avian teen.
Right now, Natasha was sitting on the counter in the kitchen. Leon looked at her,
"How are you holding up, Nat?"
Nat looked at him with a disturbed, deranged look in her eyes. The red-eyed hero winced,
"Uh, Nat. What are you doing?"
Nat looked like a zombie as she imagined Crisis as a giant Peep. She said,
"Must eat Peeps. Must eat Peeps."
She began approaching him like a zombie looking for brains. Crisis decided to bolt out of the room at super speed.
He rounded the corner and found Monica,
"She's out of control, Monica. Nat thinks I'm a Peep."
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"
Falcon and Redwing flew by, Natasha hot on their heels. Sam shouted,
"You're crazy, girl! We're not marshmallows!"
Nat growled,
"Peeps!"
Pulsar rubbed the bridge of her nose,
"How did this happen?"
Leon explained,
"Well, Natasha keeps stuffing herself full of Peeps. It was so bad, it was like an addiction, and I thought, maybe if we all worked to cure her of her Peeps addiction, then she could be slightly more…normal."
Monica looked at the red-eyed swordsman evenly,
"Did Simon approve of this?"
Wonder Man flew by, shouting,
"I don't think this was such a good idea!"
Natasha was chasing him,
"PEEPS!"
Crystal came running in,
"I've got Peeps!"
She threw the bag at Natasha. The Russian teen looked at the package and tore through it, eating every Peep in ecstatic delight. She moaned,
"Peeps."
Monica looked at Leon,
"Now, things are back to normal. Or whatever passes for it. I hope you learned your lesson."
The red-eyed swordsman nodded nervously,
"Yep, never mess with Nat's Peeps."
A loud crash was heard as Carol and Farrah rolled on the floor, in another cat-fight…again. Leon said,
"Now, if only those two learn to stop killing each other, we'll be all set."
End of One Shot
