A/N Welcome all to the next multi-chapter in the Home series. If you haven't already, please check out Every Step Leads Home, The Winding Road Leads Home, and Heading Out Toward Home. For a bit of background, read A Long Way to Home and Tim's Long Way to Home after Heading Out. Returning readers, I hope I don't disappoint. Thanks for checking this out!
Chapter One
"I'm moving in with Tim."
A single sentence, declaring independence, committing to a total change of lifestyle, abandoning all that had come before; it could be interpreted in so many different ways.
Sam Winchester watched as emotion washed through his brother's expression: hurt, anger, a quick flash of fear, then the inevitable shutdown.
"Whatever."
Sam flinched. Dean knew the best way to hurt him, and Sam struggled to recall the observations and reassurances his lover, Tim McGee, had made and given. Dean wasn't going to be able to process rationally right away. But he loved Sam, and he would eventually understand that this was the direction Sam's life had taken and he'd accept it.
Sam went and packed. He glanced around his room when he was done. He felt nothing about the place itself, but he knew how momentous this was. He'd come anytime Dean needed him, Tim understood and supported that, but the constant existence of investigation of the paranormal and battle against it was over.
"That's it?" Dean growled from the hallway. Sam turned. His brother had a bottle of whiskey and had obviously been drinking it since the moment Sam left him. Sam sighed. "You're gonna walk out on your family to go be butt-buddies with that guy?" Sam's jaw clenched and he again went through all Tim had said in his mind.
"I'm not walking away from my family. I'm building the family I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. You'll always be my brother, Dean. And I'll always be there if you need me, but Tim is my future," Sam said as calmly as he could. He knew he probably sounded petulant but at least he was trying to speak reasonably and honestly. Dean leaned against the door frame, taking another long swallow straight from the bottle, and stared at Sam. The sigh he finally let out held the weight of the world. It was a burden Sam had seen him take on far too many times, and his resolve wavered. Dean needed him so badly, but Sam needed Tim. His throat tightened.
"You're right about one thing. I'll always be your brother. So... Look, Sammy, do what you gotta do. I'll be here," Dean said quietly. Then he shook his head and walked away.
Swallowing hard against the pressure of guilt in his chest, Sam closed his eyes and pictured Tim's sweet smile. This was right. It was painful, but it was right. Tim. His future. His home.
~~~SPNCIS~~~
When Sam arrived in Silver Spring, the suburb of Washington D.C. where Tim made his home, late Friday evening, he and Tim easily brought all of Sam's belongings up from the car in two trips. A couple of boxes of books, his laptop, a duffle bag of clothes, his camping backpack with the Army blankets the two had shared on their mountain adventure, and a crate filled with monster hunting supplies were everything Sam owned. Tim had cleared space on his bookshelves for the books, in his dresser for Sam's clothes, and had asked his boss, Gibbs, to help him put a false wall in one end of his closet for the weapons and other oddments from the crate. The apartment looked no different, but Tim felt it. He looked at Sam with total joy in his heart. Sam grinned in response, releasing his nervousness. He wanted this, but it was a completely new and different way of living than he'd ever imagined.
They stood together in the kitchen waiting for water to boil for a cup of tea, and Tim reached up and stroked Sam's cheek. "You're getting pretty scruffy. You gonna grow a beard?"
"I don't know. If I'm not gonna be pre-texting, maybe I could. What do you think?"
"You're gorgeous, Sam. Bearded, clean shaven, or scruffy, it's all you so it's all great."
The answer was so totally Tim; accepting and loving, that Sam simply turned his cheek into the caress and smiled again.
Getting ready for bed felt awkward and somehow different from when they'd spent nights together before. This was the first night of their new life together, and Sam found himself a little nervous. Putting on pajama pants and a t-shirt, Sam climbed into the bed and lay on his back while Tim finished in the bathroom. Tim flipped off the light and got in next to him, turning on his side and gently putting his hand on Sam's chest.
"How are you doing, Sam?" Tim asked quietly, his voice soothing in the darkness. Sam shifted over closer to him.
"I-I guess it's kind of scary. I mean... If I'll only be hunting occasionally, what do I do? Going back to law school doesn't appeal, so..."
Tim moved his hand up to touch Sam's face. "Relax about the big stuff. We'll figure that out. How are you, right now? Are you comfortable?"
Sam inclined his cheek into Tim's palm. The simple touch made everything seem like it would fall into place. All that really mattered was that he was here with Tim. Sam turned over and wrapped an arm over Tim, shifting down to rest his head on his chest. Tim stroked his hair tenderly and held him.
"This is all new, Sam. For both of us. And I don't care what happens in the future, I am just thrilled that you're here, that you're home. I love you, Sam," Tim offered. He squeezed Sam's shoulders in a hug and Sam squeezed also, then brought his face up to Tim's. Kissing the offered lips with a smile, Tim ran his hands across the ridges and valleys of Sam's back. They kissed languorously, then slowly removed each other's clothing, lips wandering over bare skin as it was exposed. When Sam dragged his soft lips surrounded by prickly facial hair over Tim's chest, Tim confessed his appreciation for the texture.
"I changed my mind," Tim panted. "I like the whiskers."
Sam grinned and continued, using the rough stubble in creative ways as they slowly made love. Spent bodies damp and entwined, they fell into a restful slumber.
~~~SPNCIS~~~
Sam woke first the next morning, rising and showering before making coffee and breakfast for both of them. He ate but kept the eggs warm for Tim, sitting at the counter sipping his second cup and relishing the slow start to the day while he waited. His eyes roamed the apartment, enjoying the feel of Tim that permeated the place.
When Tim finally got up and came out, his smile for Sam was brilliant.
"Good morning," Tim greeted, standing clad only in his boxers. Sam grinned.
"Morning, baby. Mm, I like this look on you."
Tim blushed and Sam laughed, rising for a hug and kiss good morning. He got Tim a cup of coffee and retrieved the food he'd prepared. Standing in the kitchen, leaning back against the counter and drinking his own coffee, Sam watched Tim eat, his chest filling with his affection for and adoration of the man.
"I was thinking," Tim said around a bite. "The Star Trek movie opened yesterday. Do you want to go see it?"
Sam hesitated a bare instant. "Yeah, that sounds good."
Tim had seen the hitch before Sam's answer, of course. "You sure?"
Sam nodded eagerly to make up for his slip. He was in this relationship for good and all, so he vowed to himself he was going to get used to being in public with his male lover. "Wanna ask DiNozzo if he wants to come?" Sam offered. Tim's double-take was classic. Tony DiNozzo was notorious for teasing, sometimes to the point of being hurtful, but he was one of Tim's closest friends nonetheless. He was the last person Tim expected Sam to want to spend time with.
"Really?"
Sam smiled. "He already knows about us. Why not? It's an easier outing, pardon the pun, than dinner or something since we'll be watching a movie. I kinda gather we should break him in slowly to...this."
Tim felt warmth suffuse his chest. Sam was making an effort to be part of every aspect of his life, and it was an amazing gesture. "I love you."
It was Sam's turn to blush.
After finishing breakfast, Tim looked up locations and times for the movie and called Tony, setting up the meeting. Happily, Tim went to shower. Sam listened to the water run, thinking of the times they'd showered together in the past, and considered joining Tim. A look at the time had him shaking his head. They'd likely miss the movie if he pursued his thoughts to their natural end. Still, the image in his mind of Tim with water sluicing over his body stirred his desire further. Maybe there was enough time for something quick...
Tim had just finished shaving when Sam came up behind him. Tim smiled suspiciously in anticipation at the look in Sam's eyes. Tim watched him in the mirror. The big, warm hands slid around his naked torso, one stopping flat against Tim's stomach below his navel, the other sliding across and up to skim over the anti-possession tattoo that he'd gotten to protect him from demons. It matched the one over Sam's heart. Tim leaned back against Sam while the taller man played with his nipple. Tim bit his lip and chuckled. The laugh turned to a gasp when Sam bent his head and licked the back of Tim's neck on the freshly revealed skin from the haircut he'd gotten the previous afternoon in preparation for Sam's first night at home. Sam nibbled across the skin to Tim's ear.
"Something funny?" Sam's deep voice was low, his breath softly caressing Tim's cheek. Tim realized he had closed his eyes and opened them to meet the beautiful complexity of Sam's reflection.
"N-no... Ah!"
Sam bit him below the ear and simultaneously tweaked his nipple. Tim wriggled in Sam's grasp, but Sam held his position, pressing Tim's body against him. Sam went back to a more sensuous sucking and licking of Tim's neck, and Tim relaxed, closing his eyes and letting his head drop back against Sam's shoulder, his breath quickening. He could feel Sam's erection against his back and it fueled his arousal. He brought his own hand up to Sam's head, running his fingers through his hair and cupping his head.
"Oh, Sam," Tim sighed.
Sam slid his fingers lower, under the elastic of Tim's boxers. Tim trembled, nearly panting. Sam stroked him, and Tim's hand tightened in Sam's hair. Sam groaned and ground against Tim's back. Tim arched and humped Sam's hand. Sam bit harder on Tim's shoulder, below where it would show in his work clothes.
"Ah! Yes! Sammm..." The name devolved into a long moan.
Sam had apparently had enough of teasing and made one of his fast position changes. Tim figured Sam would be an awesome lead if they ever danced, since he gave clear signals and got Tim to go exactly how he wanted him to with never a misstep. Tim found himself turned and leaning back against the vanity, his boxers around his ankles, with Sam on his knees before him in a heartbeat. Tim stepped one foot out of his underwear to spread his legs, and rested his hands on Sam's shoulders, fingers stroking in circles on the smooth skin. The soft touch turned to a tight hold when Sam's lips passed over his glans and Sam's tongue swirled against his shaft. Tim shuddered at the wet heat. Sam kept his strokes shallow until Tim begged.
"Sam, please, oh god..."
Sam enveloped him and Tim cried out. His dick buried in Sam, anywhere, was Tim's ultimate sexual pleasure. One hand went up into Sam's hair, the other braced against the wall, and when Sam began his long, deep bobbing, Tim took up his worshipful chant of Sam's name.
Sam brought a hand up and gently rubbed against Tim's balls. Tim shook with tremors, his voice cracking. Sam's fingers ran further back to play with Tim's hole. Tim sobbed and his hips began jerking. Sam sped up, feeling the tightening in Tim.
Light exploded behind Tim's eyelids as he came. In his mind's eye he saw come boiling up from his balls, splattering inside Sam's mouth and throat, and he cried out at the thought. Sam tenderly sucked every bit of orgasm from him, and helped Tim drop to the floor in front of him.
Tim let Sam support him as he caught his wind. Sam ran his hands lovingly over Tim; his neck and back, arms and sides.
Tim finally moved. He kissed Sam and gave him a shaky smile. The sparkling of Tim's eyes and the adorable smile made Sam almost as happy as knowing that the blow job he'd just given had been truly fantastic. Sam stroked Tim's cheek and returned the kiss.
"Are we gonna go to that movie or what?" Sam asked, his voice light as he got to his feet and pulled Tim up with him.
"But don't you - aren't you... I mean, I could..." Tim gestured to Sam's groin.
"Baby, I'm good. You know, uh," Sam flushed slightly, "how much I enjoy doing that." He looked down and only met Tim's gaze when he tilted his chin up by hand.
"No judgment here, I just don't want to be taking and not giving you anything in return."
Sam's mouth quirked into a smile. "Maybe I'll let you give and I'll do some taking later," he said suggestively.
"As long as that's...what you want," Tim said uncertainly. He was still worried.
"Tim," Sam's voice grew sharp and Tim's frown deepened. "I wanted to blow you. I think later on tonight, I'd like you to fuck me up the ass. How's that for clarity?" Both men's faces turned scarlet at the blatant vulgarity. Sam still hadn't come to terms with being a bottom, but lashing out hurtfully was out of character for him.
"Sam, I can't..." Tim swallowed hard. Tears filled his eyes and he rolled them at his own reaction. "Sam, I love you, okay? You love me. We're both men, and that kinda sucks for both of us, but we've chosen to be together. I enjoy having sex with you: however we do it. It's not what I'm used to, sure, but it's you, and I love it not only because it feels good but because it's an intimate and loving and beautiful way to express our feelings. I know you're uncomfortable with how things have developed, but please, I have to ask you not to demean either us or what we do by talking that way. Please, Sam." He shook his head. "I love you. No one else ever has to know any details of our sex life, and if they do and you'd be more comfortable if everyone thought our roles were reversed, that's fine. I don't care! I don't care what anyone else thinks as long as we can be okay when it's just us. Is that...? Can you...? Oh, Sam," Tim felt his tears overflow and immediately turned away to wipe his face and hide them.
Sam wrapped his arms around Tim and held him tight. Tim buried his face down against Sam's chest, putting his arms around his waist.
"I'm sorry, baby. It's just... I don't know. I feel so... It's like I'm ashamed of it, but I'm mad at myself for feeling that way. I should never take that out on you, though. I'm sorry. Degrading you or our relationship is the last thing I want to do."
"Or yourself."
"What?"
Tim drew back and looked into Sam's eyes. "Don't degrade yourself, either. Sam, I honestly think that doing what you do takes more strength, more will, than anything I've ever done."
Sam shook his head. "I don't know about that. But thank you for saying it. I know you believe it. I..." He shrugged. "I'm sorry. I love you, Tim."
"I love you too."
But Tim knew it wasn't resolved. He'd have to figure out a way to help Sam come to terms with their sexual expression.
~~~SPNCIS~~~
They'd agreed to meet DiNozzo outside the theater, and as they walked from the parking garage, Tim was pleased when he noted a change in how Sam accompanied him. Whereas previously Sam had taken up a protective, almost bodyguard position, he currently walked shoulder to shoulder with Tim.
"Hey, Tony," Tim said as they approached. DiNozzo turned.
"Hey, guys, how's it goin'?" He said casually.
"Really, dude? You're gonna ask about 'it' straight out the gate? It?" Sam rumbled, glaring and leaning forward to look down at Tony with as sharp of an angle he could manage. Tony's eyes grew huge and flitted to Tim then back to Sam. The tall man was very good at using his size for intimidation.
"I - no - wait -" DiNozzo stammered.
Sam relaxed back and smiled, almost a smirk at having pulled one over on the older man. "I'm just kidding. Thanks for coming, man." He slapped Tony on the shoulder and moved past him toward the door of the building. DiNozzo's enormous eyes locked on Tim in question. Tim just grinned and went after Sam.
"Good to see you, Tony," Tim said as he passed. He didn't notice the bounce in his own step, but DiNozzo did. Sam held the door for both men, then followed them into the lobby.
Tim sat between them and the two agents spent the time before the movie catching Sam up on the plot of the first Star Trek reboot. Relaxing after the first laugh he gave in the opening moments of the film ("That was our ride!"), Sam straightened and put his arm across the seat behind Tim, who had become engrossed from the instant the lights first dimmed. Watching both the movie and his lover, Sam enjoyed the next two hours. Tim's physical and emotional reactions fascinated Sam. They had watched tv and movies at Tim's apartment before, but this experience was different, more immersive for Tim. Sam decided they needed to go to the movies regularly.
After the movie, the three men talked as they walked out toward their cars. Tim and Tony exclaimed over the revelation of who the villain truly was, Sam commented on his fighting techniques, and they agreed that it had been a good time. Tony still seemed skittish of Sam, but when they parted ways, they shook hands and Tony seemed to relax at Sam's genuine smile.
Making love that night, Tim put every effort into having it be loving and respectful. He slid inside Sam face to face, whispering words of adoration. In Sam's eyes he saw gratitude and love reflected and he pushed himself further, putting all his efforts into pleasuring his lover. Sweat across Sam's chest glinted in the moonlight from the window, his perfection making Tim's heart contract even as he thrust slowly, giving everything to Sam.
"Oh, Sam, you're amazing. Oh god, you feel so good. Oh, oh, so beautiful... My love, my sweet sweet Sam," Tim murmured. Sam's hips were meeting every motion Tim made, his head was moving restlessly, and Tim could feel the tension building. He slowed and Sam groaned. Tim leaned forward, kissing him reverently and stroking his face. "Sam, I love you. I love you," he whispered. Sam sighed his name and Tim began again, drawing the loving out, bringing Sam to the edge twice, three times. His control wavered at the panting whimpers Sam made when he slowed yet again.
"Please, Tim, oh god, please," Sam finally gasped. Tim responded immediately, firmly finding a rhythm to take Sam to the heights and this time let him summit and then fall.
Moaning, gulping, sobbing inarticulately, Sam finally came, his entire body locking, clenching, squeezing Tim inside him. The pulses of his orgasm made Tim cry out, calling Sam's name as he too climaxed. Tim fell across Sam, both their skin damp and slick. Tim's arms trembled with fatigue, and Sam's body shivered in the aftermath. Wrapped in each other's arms, they slept deeply.
~~~SPNCIS~~~
A/N Reviews are greatly appreciated.
