Author's Note: This story started as a response in a thread by Love Robin over on the Haven in a thread on Drakken's origins called Drakken Sings the Blues. As usual, it quickly turned into a plot bunny of its own and… well…

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BLUE BEGINNINGS

A Quick Little Origin Story By SHADO Commander

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"Well, Lipsky, what have you got?"

Drew Lipsky looked confidently up the long table at his employer's slug-like face, ignoring the glares of his disgraced colleagues, all of whom had failed miserably at THEIR assigned tasks and now radiated their dissatisfaction back at him in two long, neat rows of scowls.

"That's Doctor Lipsky," Drew corrected with the smile of one who knew he had already passed the test set before him. How could they have doubted it? True, his doctorate was from an online college with a dubious reputation, but the establishment hadn't been quite thoroughly discredited yet and the only reason he'd been kicked out of his original alma mater had been that incident involving his former roommate and his junior goonsquad of cronies. Sure, THEY'D gone on to prestigious positions in the space and robotics industry while he had ended up here, but his work on this project had proven that his knowledge and skill were every bit the equal of theirs, and someday he'd show them what it meant to tangle with a REAL super-genius…

A low growling sound, like might be produced by squeezing a badger softly by its privates, interrupted Drew's ongoing thought processes.

"You'll be the unemployed Dr. Lipsky if you don't get on with it," the man who signed his paycheck snorted malevolently, as Drew's co-workers started to snicker. "Have you completed your assignment or not?"

"Yes sir, I have," Drew replied, stifling the 'Ha! Take that you fools!' he wanted to throw in the faces of his stunned looking co-workers. How dare they look surprised by the fact that he had succeeded? Once again he was reminded of how unfair this world was. The BUFFOON in front of them had done nothing to deserve his position… well, nothing except to have had the genetic fortune to have been the eldest member of the family when the company founder died. Yet the oaf persisted in tormenting Lipsky and his fellow researchers, both by giving them assignments that were so unintellectually challenging that a chimpanzee could perform them and then berating them for lack of progress when the real fault lay in the company's thoroughly incompetent industrial espionage division. And that, in fact, was the reason Drew had finally succeeded in his task, having realized that the information he'd been given was incomplete! Once he'd figured that out, solving the rest of the puzzle was as simple as child's play, if a little unethical.

Of course, everything that this company did was a bit on the unethical side, so what did that matter? For the truth was that what Dr. Drew Lipsky had been hired to do was duplicate the formulas of the company's far more successful competitor's upcoming new products, allowing them to have knock-off versions of those products out and on the market even as their competitor's advertising campaigns were just starting to warm up. And since it was obvious that the company was built upon thievery, Drew had had no reason not to sink to his employer's own levels and hire his own private thief, one who'd apparently been far more successful than the slug at the end of the table's paid menials had been. He'd done it all under a pseudonym of course, out of a second lab, so the thief couldn't have been traced back to him in the event that she'd been caught, but not only had Drew obtained the formulas, he'd obtained an actual sample and perfectly duplicated it.

A sample of which he now produced from his lab-coat's left pocket with a theatrical flourish and placed on a small china plate he'd pulled from the right… a task made easier by his unusually tiny hands.

"Voila," Drew smiled, gloating and savoring the sweet moment of success.

A moment that was dashed, once again, by his employer's cynical skepticism.

"Really?" The insufferable man grunted with a suspicious scowl. "I wasn't aware of any tests being run

"I did them myself, at home," Drew admitted. "And my… assistant has been using the product three times daily for over a week now. She reports that it performs as promised; delivering a thrill to the taste buds while having no detectable side effects."

"Really…" His employer's evil little eyes squinted even more evilly. "Then perhaps YOU would like to sample the product for us?"

"Me?" Drew blinked. "Now?"

"Now," His employer confirmed.

"Well, I don't normally chew gum," Drew pointed out, "But, if you insist."

Popping the tiny wad of gum into his mouth, Drew had the tiniest, most momentarily infinitesimally fleeting thought that perhaps a green-skinned woman with superpowers wasn't perhaps the most representative test subject he could have used, but she had been both convenient and already in the loop, and he had full and complete confidence in his own work.

He WAS a genius, after all.

"Mmmm," Drew murmured as the first tastes hit his tongue. "It's like a fruit salad… cantaloupe, honeydew, strawberries, blueberries and pineapple with a light poppyseed dressing. No, wait, it's changing…"

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The young thief named Shego looked up from her nails as the door to the secret private lab slammed open and her temporary employer entered in the bluest mood she'd ever seen him in… in fact…

Shego's jaw dropped.

"D…Doc?" She stammered. "You're… BLUE."

"Thank you for pointing out the obvious, Shego," Drew Lipsky, aka Doctor Drakken snarled. "MISTER Slugworth was so kind as to point out the same thing, right before he told me that Willy Wonka's been having the same problem and sent me to the juicing room! That candy-making BASTARD!"

"But that's alright," Drew glared, dripping wet blueberry juice from every pore of his body. "I've learned an important lesson here today. To hell with trying to make an honest living! I just learned about a ray-gun that Fickelgruber's been developing that turns everything into taffy! You'll steal it for me and then I'll make Slugworth pay! Him AND Wonka AND Jimmy Possible AND the world!"

Shego sighed as her apparently now permanent employer launched into a huge evil 'Bwa ha ha ha ha ha!' Yeah, she'd pegged Drakken as the 'want to take over the world type' when they'd first met. To be honest, she should have been looking for another gig and had only hung around afterwards for the free samples, but since it looked like he was out of the candy business for good, she might as well give the sidekick business a shot.

It WAS a shame, though. She'd really, REALLY liked that 'Three-Course-Dinner' gum stuff… even if it did always leave her feeling a little bloated afterwards.

Fin

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Omake – Just a little bit from the original that didn't make the final cut –

A half-dozen Wegos entered the room and rolled the juice-filled Drakken off for squeezing, happily chanting their strange little song:

"Wego - Mego - Hego-ty boo,
Looks like the Doc's all covered in blue...
Wego - Mego - Shego-tee dee,
But at least he's got lots of Vitamin C!"

LEGAL SCHTUFFINGS – Drew Lipsky/Doctor Drakken, Shego, James Possible and all other characters from the wonderful KP Universe are the creations of Mark McCorkle and Bob Schooley, and those names are all trademarks of the Disney media organizations. Arthur Slugworth, Willy Wonka and Mr. Ficklegruber were created by Roald Dahl in the novel CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY and are the copyright of his estate. Although use in this context may be considered fair under parody law, just in case: this work was not created for profit, no money changed hands etc. I do this out of love, not for profit.