Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or real people portrayed in this story. The characters belong to WWE and the real people own themselves. Also this story is rated M for a reason, so if you are underage, do yourself a favor and don't read.


A/N: This is just a short three-parter I've written and it's a little...dirtier than I guess I'm used to writing, so please be easy on me if it really sucks. Let me know what you think since it is kind of my style, but then...kind of not. If you want to read more, let me know, if you want to be brutal, that's fine too, I don't mind, just leave a review and let me know what you think. :)

He had become a suit and he couldn't figure out just when that happened.

He had been a wrestler for so long and now he was an announcer. It was strange to go from the ring to the proverbial booth. But this was the natural step of his career, well, it would've been had it been happening several years into the future. He hadn't envisioned his big return being a big return to talk about wrestling. Still, Vince had told him they would involve him in the storylines as well, they just wanted to use him in this capacity because he had mentioned that he wasn't too keen on coming back full-time. An announcing position meant that he wasn't putting his body through much, and he was still there, just not in the ring.

It would work out, he knew this, it would just take time to get used to it, like anything in life. Like his divorce, he'd have to get used to that situation as well. But it just wasn't meant to be, that whole thing, marriage, life, it just wasn't meant to work out the way that he had originally thought. Maybe he should've come back full-time, thrown his head right back into his work and forgotten all about bitchy, little blondes who messed up his life and his wallet. But it was too late, and he had taken what he could get and it was this.

"Welcome aboard," Vince said, shaking the man's hand.

"Thanks, Vince, I guess this'll be good," Chris said, still a little unsure about the situation. He was going to just have to get used to announcing. "Are you sure you want me at the announcer's table though?" He thought he'd just ask one more time.

"I have no problem with it," Vince said. "With JBL coming back into the ring, SmackDown could use Jerry back over there, and you'd be the perfect addition here on Monday night. The fans like you, they would want to listen to you, and you're popular too. Plus, we could stick you in a match now and then and you might not embarrass yourself."

Chris chuckled. "I was just wondering, I promise that I'll do a good job."

"I have no worries about that, plus, I'm always backstage, telling you what to do so you're never without someone there," Vince said. "You'll get used to it. I know this is just your first night so I'm going to try not to put too many expectations on you…"

"Except you are," Chris said, knowing that Vince tended to accept nothing less than perfection and when he didn't get it, he tended to lose his cool.

"Okay, I guess I am," he conceded. "But I know that you're capable of doing this. You're one of the best we've got, Chris, now don't let us down."

"I'm going to try not to," he said, standing up and shaking Vince's hand.

He wondered, later, what the hell he was going to talk about, really. He knew that he was going to help call the action, be the color guy to JR's play-by-play, and he knew that he was going to have heel-like tendencies. That was the extent of it. They really didn't give the announcers a lot to work with, and that was where the problem for him was going to be. Before, when he was an active member of the roster, he would know just what subject he was going to talk about, but now, he only got these notes, short ones, about segments, and then the script and he was supposed to make witty and engaging comments on it. He was starting to feel like he had screwed himself over.

"Are you ready for tonight, Chris?" JR asked as he came up to him shortly before they were set to go out there. The announcers always got introduced before the show with their entrances.

"Yeah, I think so," Chris said.

"Good, good," the older man said. "Don't worry about it out there, you'll be a natural, it's easier than you think."

"You don't say?"

"You'll be fine," he reassured him. "Just fine. You've always been a good speaker, you'll do just fine."

"I hope so," Chris said, giving the man a lopsided smile as he adjusted his tie, which seemed to have tightened up on its own. Was it also getting hot in here? Maybe it was because he was pretty sure that his collar was getting damp from the sweat collecting on it. He made a swipe at it, and felt the clamminess of his hands. God, Chris Jericho was nervous, this did not bode well. He didn't get nervous for anything, but he had never spoken for almost two hours straight about just wrestling. He gulped at the thought as the Boomer Sooner song started and JR went out there, waving his hands, Chris was sure, at the audience. He'd be going out next.

And then it started, the countdown he had become so familiar with, the one that almost defined him. How appropriate, he thought, that he had a countdown at this exact moment because he was terribly nervous. But then it was over and he was walking out there and wiping his palms on his pants before waving to the raucous crowd. He slapped hands with a few people while walking around the ring to sit next to JR and wait for the show to actually begin. He slipped his headphones on, effectively drowning out pretty much everything as he could hear Vince talking to him from backstage.

"Okay, we're going live in five minutes, be ready in five minutes," Vince said and Chris looked down to the notes he had made earlier and that had been sitting here waiting for his arrival. He cleared his throat and took a sip of water as the crowd seemed to settle down to wait for the beginning of the show. He caught the eye of a girl who was staring at him and he winked at her over his sunglasses and he could practically see her swooning and he laughed at that. It definitely put him at ease as the countdown for the show started.

Five…

Four…

Three…

Two…

One…

"Welcome to Monday Night Raw!" JR said. "We are live from San Jose, California, and we've got a helluva show for you tonight, and a new announcer with us, Chris Jericho."

"Yes JR, Vince finally decided to inject some young blood around here," Chris said, falling naturally into his place. "It's only a matter of time before I'm taking over for you too and I'm the only one up here because let's face it, I've got enough charm for three people."

"I'm sure you do, Chris, but tonight's not about you."

"It's always about me," Chris said cockily.

"Well, not right now, coming up first, we've got a barn-burner of a match-up between Edge and Carlito."

"And if you think that Carlito even has a chance in this match, you've been drowning yourself in too much barbeque sauce, JR. My man, Edge, is going to school Carlito and show him who's the best around here."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that," JR countered. "Carlito is a young buck and he shouldn't be underestimated."

"Buck?" Chris asked. "Are we on a hunting trip, take off the cowboy hat, JR, we ain't in the country anymore."

"You're doing great," Vince told Chris from the back. "I'm loving the banter you have going back and forth. This match is going to end in a no contest when Randy comes to interfere in the match. He's going to clock Carlito and Edge as well, but Edge is going to get up and Randy is going to RKO him before doing a short promo in the ring. The match is going to last six minutes before the run-in, just keep up with the banter through the match, you should be fine."

Chris was relieved to hear that he was doing well in his new job. He was also relieved to find that this wasn't as hard as he thought it was going to be. It was really like having a conversation with someone. And he had played the heel so many times that being a heel announcer was like a second nature to him. He added in some nice comments here and there during the match as well, having intimate knowledge of the goings-on in the ring. He thought that JR appreciated that. Yeah, he could get used to this job, plus he got a front row seat for the entire show and that was a good thing too.

Stephanie leaned against the table in front of her father, "Daddy, the lawyers are here to see you about drawing up those contracts."

"Tell them to wait," Vince said impatiently.

"I did, Daddy, and they were impatient," Stephanie said. "They want to see you now."

"Can you go meet with them?" he asked. "I'm trying to do the show right now, and either you go meet with them or they're going to have to wait."

"I don't think they like either of those options," Stephanie said bored. She didn't even want to come talk to her father. He was always bordering on belligerent during the shows, and she hated even trying to have a normal conversation with him. She would rather go to her office and just work the night away.

"Well I'm busy."

"So are they," she responded.

"Damn it," Vince said. "I should fire them for their utter incompetence."

"Yeah, okay," she said, blowing out a breath.

Vince put his headphones back on, "JR, Chris, I have business to attend to, you guys are going to be on your own for a while, you've got the notes in front of you, you should be okay."

Vince stood up and Stephanie gave him a mock salute as he walked away. Her cell phone vibrated against her hip and she pulled it out and looked at the display. "Paul" it said and she flipped it open and held it up to her ear. "Hey Paul."

"Hey baby, what are you doing?"

"I'm standing here."

"Are you wearing underwear?"

"None of your business," she teased, then said. "Paul, I'm in the middle of working, this isn't the time for this, so you shouldn't be calling me unless it's to tell me how your rehab went today. That's all I care about."

"It went fine, it was hard, but fine," he said with a sigh, wondering why she wouldn't engage in the playful teasing he was starting up. He just wanted her to be like the Stephanie she was before he hurt his quad, fun, willing to joke around, there for him. She had seemed to change drastically and he wasn't sure that he was too fond of the changes in her since his accident and recent surgery.

"Good, look, I'll call you later, okay, I've got work to do."

"Yeah, okay," he said, sounding disappointed. Stephanie hung up with barely a goodbye, just a sort of grunt and he was upset that his relationship with her was going south so quickly.

Stephanie went to turn away when the monitor caught her eye. It was trained on Chris and he was talking with JR about something that had just happened. Chris was looking good tonight, she noted, and comfortable with his new position. She looked around and didn't see anyone in the immediate area, and since she was so bored and was feeling a little on the playful side, she sat down in her father's chair and put on his headphones, reaching forward and flipping the switch that went exclusively to Chris's headphones.

"Hello, Chris," she said, deepening her voice to a husky whisper.

Chris looked up from the notes he had been looking at during the commercial and narrowed his eyes. That was not Vince's voice, that was for sure, but he couldn't quite place whose voice it was. He kind of looked around, like he should expect some woman to pop out at that moment and reveal herself to him. He cleared his throat a little, wanting to respond, but not being able to because the commercial was coming up fast, but he didn't manage to hiss.

"Who is this?"

"Mmm, Chris, I know who you are," she whispered into his headphones. Chris looked over to JR to see if he was hearing this, but he gave no indication that he could hear anything. "JR can't hear me, baby."

"Who is this?" he asked again, but then had to go immediately into, "And we're back and you're looking at the gorgeous San Jose skyline."

"You have such a nice voice," Stephanie said, "I'd love to hear it moaning my name when you're pounding into me, do you want to pound into me, Chris?"

Chris coughed a little and was glad that there was a promo going on from Shawn Michaels at the moment. He didn't know who this woman was or why she was doing this, but it was getting to be really distracting and he had caught JR looking at him twice already, and he hoped that he wasn't turning red or suffocating or sweating like a pig. He wanted to tell this woman to stop, that he was at work, but there was just no way. He didn't know the intricacies of the headphones yet. He knew you could talk to only the backstage, but he didn't know which switch it was, and with his luck, he'd press a button that would make everyone hear this voice.

He shook his head, knowing that whoever was saying these things could see him too on the monitors. "Oh, really, Chrissy, because I want to feel your cock inside of me, in fact I'd love to suck you off right now. How does that sound? Do you like the idea of my hot, wet mouth running up and down your dick? I could do it right now, baby, just come out there, kneel under that desk and give you the best head you've ever had while you call the rest of the show."

Whoever this was had a filthy mouth, absolutely filthy, and he was trying very hard not to get turned on even though the voice was sexy as hell and he hadn't been with anyone since he had left his wife. He knew the opportunity was there, but he just didn't feel right. So yeah, you could say that he had a case of the blue balls right now. He took a deep breath and swallowed, commenting on the segment as it ended, but he could hardly focus now and he hoped that nobody could tell.

"Well that was quite the challenge that the Heartbreak Kid just issued, don't you think so, Chris?"

"Uh, yes, yes it was," he almost stammered before catching himself. "Of course, I would take it up if I were Lashley, even if he is in ECW. I could take HBK out with one hand tied behind my back though."

"You didn't seem to when you lost to him at WrestleMania XIX."

"Fluke, JR, that was a total fluke."

"Fluke sounds like fuck," the voice said again. "I want you to fuck me, Chrissy, everywhere. I'd love to feel you cum deep inside me, I'm wet for you right now, Chrissy, soft and wet and so very, willing. Come backstage right now and we can just do it right here, you can rip my bra and panties off and stick your nice, hard dick inside of me and make me see stars."

Chris cleared his throat again, "If I wanted to beat HBK, trust me, he would've had his ass handed to him, I just didn't want him to look weak."

"Sure, Chris, I'm sure that was it," JR said sarcastically.

"Oops, I've got to go baby, looks like Vinnie Mac is coming back soon and I don't want to be caught with my hand down my skirt, fingering myself thinking that it's your fingers inside of me."

That was the last he heard of the voice for the rest of the night. He was relieved though, because it was really starting to get to him, and he was afraid he'd have to wait for everyone in the arena to leave before he could get up from this desk. The rest of the night went more smoothly now that he had his head cleared of any seductive female voices that were tormenting him. When the show was over, JR shook his hand and congratulated him on a job well done, but he just wanted out of there. He was uncomfortable and he desperately wanted to just forget that someone had been saying some very naughty things to him. Who could it have been though?

He walked backstage and didn't see any females around. He was distracted and didn't even hear Vince calling after him. He was so distracted he didn't even see someone fall into step beside him until he reached his dressing room for the evening and saw Stephanie standing there with a grin on her face. He looked at her a moment and she thrust a paper at him.

"Script for next week," she explained with a self-indulgent smile. "Good work this week, by the way, very good work."

"Thanks," he murmured as she walked away with a little bounce in her step. He walked inside and over to his things, where a note was sitting on top.

Same time next week…you make me so wet for you.

He had just entered into a world of trouble.