Hello everyone! Today I am bringing you my very first TFIOS fanfic! *crowd cheers* I've had this idea for a while, but I never got around to writing it until today. Please leave a review and maybe some predictions once you finish reading! Thank you for clicking on this story!
I wake up gasping for air. My chest is on fire and I can barely breathe. I close my eyes and choke as I sob. To say that this hurts is a serious understatement; I'm writing in pain and screaming as well as I can because I can't freaking breathe.
"Mom!" I cough. "Dad!" I hear the thudding as both of my parents run up the stairs.
"Hazel!" My mom shouts. "What's wrong, sweetie? What hurts?"
"Ch-chest." I choke out. "I-I'm d-d-dying... A-aren't I?"
"Hazel, don't think that." My dad whispers. "You're going to be fine. Just fine."
"J-just f-f-fine." I repeat. I choke again, this time vomiting over the edge of the bed. "Augustus." I whisper weakly.
Okay, you're probably lost right now. I'll explain. The great love of my life, Augustus Waters, died eleven months ago. I've been severely depressed ever since, with my lungs struggling along as best as they can. I would visit Isaac every once in a while, but I really just want to talk to Augustus again. For the past nine months or so, I've just been wishing that I would die. But now that it's actually happening, I'm not so sure that I'm ready.
I've had a few miracles through the years, but somehow I know that I won't have another miracle this time around. I don't know how I know, I just kind of know.
"Hazel, sweetie, Augustus... Isn't here." My mom says desperately. "Remember?"
"Y-yes." I suddenly choke and empty whatever's left in my stomach. "M-mom..."
"Yes, sweetie. I'm here. I'm here." She says.
"I-it just h-h-hurts s-so much." I sob, which makes me choke again. "I am dying."
"Hazel, your father's calling nine one one. Stay calm. It will be okay." My mother sounds desperate. "It will be fine. You're going to be fine."
Ten minutes later, I am lifted onto a stretcher by paramedics and my body is pumped full of painkillers, but they have no effect. I'm in tears the whole ride. Normally I don't cry, but right now I really can't help it. Flames are licking the inside of my crap lungs as I struggle to breathe in and out, in and out. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. Come on lungs, I think. Come on. Just hold on for a little while longer.
When we finally get to the hospital, my cancer doctor, Maria, greets us with a grim expression.
"She's having intense chest pain, trouble breathing even with the bi-pap, and she has vomited twice." My dad says.
"I'm going to order a PET scan and an MRI," doctor Maria orders. She wheels my gurney down to the special room and I lie as still as I can while the scans take place. Everything hurts more and more by the second, and I don't know how much longer I can hold on. I start to close my eyes, only to be interrupted by doctor Maria.
"Hazel, stay awake for a little longer please." She says gently.
"But I'm so tired!" I sob and choke as the words come out. I vomit on the floor once more, and then start crying again. "It just... Hurts... S-so much."
An hour later, I'm finally wheeled into the ICU, and I'm told that I'm allowed to sleep. I close my eyes and I'm surrounded by darkness.
"Alright, I have some bad news." Doctor Maria pulled Mr. And Mrs. Lancaster aside in the hallway. "Hazel's tutors have grown and spread to her heart. We are going to start her on some intense chemotherapy and radiation, but... I'm sorry. Your daughter only has a three percent chance of survival. She only has about a month left, and that's only if we start the treatment right away."
Both of the Lancasters were too shocked to speak at first, but then Mrs. Lancaster piped up.
"And... If we don't start the treatment right away?" She asked calmly, as if she had been preparing for the worst case scenario.
"Probably a week at most, and she will be in intense pain either way, but of we try to treat it, the pain has a chance of lessening. It's your choice, because I know that you might just want her to go faster." Maria replied grimly.
Mr. Lancaster was crying, but he took a deep breath. "Well, obviously we are going to go with the option that will cause our daughter less pain." He said quietly, avoiding the oncologist's gaze. "When will the treatments start?"
"As soon as we possibly can. Her heart's not going to hold out more than a day or two if we don't start soon." Both of the Lancasters nodded sorrowfully. "Oh, and Mr. and Mrs. Lancaster? I'm sorry that we can't do more, but this is really our last option."
"Thank you, Doctor Maria." Mrs. Lancaster said. "For everything you've done for Hazel... And our family over the years."
I dream of whitish, silvery, wispy clouds. They float around me and cloud my vision. I can see someone's silhouette in the distance, if only these clouds would go away. I cry out, and the silhouette turns to face me.
"Augustus!" I shout. The silhouette gets closer, and Augustus' arms grab my shoulders gently and I'm pulled into his warm embrace. "Hazel Grace," he whispers.
"I missed you." I whisper back. He continues to rub my back soothingly. "Are you... Am I... Staying here?"
"Oh, no, Hazel Grace." Augustus says softly, gently. "But you'll get to see me soon enough, I promise."
And he disappears, along with the whitish, silvery, wispy clouds.
What did you think? Feedback? Predictions for next chapter? Please please please leave a review!
