Disclaimer: I do not, nor have I ever, owned Big Time Rush, or Panic! At the Disco, their song "I Write Sins, Not Tragedies", or anything else that is recognizable.

A/N: So, this is becoming a tradition. Right before I finish a story, I go and post a new one before I can actually get the epilogue for the other story up. I was determined not to let that happen this time, but this is a story I've been wanting to get up for awhile, and since I haven't actually updated any of my stories for a couple of weeks, I figured now would be a good time to post this. Plus, I started it back in early March, so...yeah, it's been about six months. So. Here's the thing. This is supposed to be more comedy than drama. I'm not saying I succeeded (though I'm hoping I did), but I'm doing my best with it. This is an idea that's been playing around in my head for the past couple of years, and it was actually inspired by two different songs: Taylor Swift's song "Speak Now" and Panic! At the Disco's song "I Write Sins, Not Tragedies". And yes, the latter is where the name came from. I was listening to the song on the radio and after being lost in my head for a couple of years, this story just forced it's way to the front and hit me from the side, so it seemed appropriate to name it after the song.

This is a lot lighter than my other stuff, so hopefully it works. That being said, this is just the prologue and it does have some drama in it. But it's just setting up the story, so even if it sucks, I hope you'll stick with it because the chapters are a little bit different than the prologue. :) As always, a huge shout out and thank you to Dana2184 for being awesome and reading the first two chapters without the prologue (because I hadn't actually written it yet...) and loving them. The prologue is kind of brief and on the short side, but the actual chapters will be longer :) There's two main pairings in this story: James/Katie and Logan/Camille, with Kendall/Jo and Carlos/Stephanie on the side, and it's a Minnesota AU.

The rating is T for the moment, but I'm not promising anything. I don't trust my characters in this, so it's entirely possible that the rating will go up to M.

Enjoy the prologue :)


Prologue

Katie's POV

Here's the thing about rehearsal dinners – they're boring.

Like, really, really boring. The entire evening had been boring. The wedding party – every single person in the wedding – had been required to make an appearance so that we could go through the wedding, step by step, and make sure no one tripped or stumbled or dropped the ring or decided not to wait for the whole "speak now or forever hold your peace" speech the pastor was supposed to give during the actual ceremony.

We had only been there for an hour and the ceremony had just barely begun, but my feet were killing me. I was in my own personal hell and most of it was completely my fault. I couldn't remember why exactly I had thought it would be a good idea to wear high heels, but I was going to hazard a guess that comfort hadn't been on my mind at the time.

So now I was reaping the rewards of being three inches taller by feeling as if my feet were about to burst out into blisters. Yeah, I was in a fantastic mood…

And my mood wasn't being helped any by the guy who was supposed to be escorting me down the aisle. Camille had insisted every bridesmaid have an escort, and so…I got stuck with James Diamond. Which, in my opinion, was pretty stupid, since he was easily 6'1 or 6'2, and I barely topped five feet on a good day. Even in my three inch heels he still towered over me, a skyscraper to my single story house. And he made sure to point that out every five seconds.

"So, I think there're surgeries that help to enhance your height," he informed me as we walked slowly down the aisle, a few feet behind Kendall and Jo. Carlos and Stephanie were behind us, and Lucy was at the piano, a bored look on her face as her fingers drifted over the keys to some classical piece Camille and Logan had picked out. "You know, make you grow. In case you're interested."

Logan was standing at the head of the church beside the pastor, while his and Camille's parents sat in the audience. Both of their mothers were sobbing their eyes out. Occasionally, Mrs. Mitchell would let out a trumpet-like sound as she blew her nose, or Mrs. Roberts would wail at the top of her lungs.

I smirked, even as I kept my eyes straight ahead. "And I know there're surgeries to enhance your dick. Doesn't mean you've got to compensate."

"Even in your heels you're a midget."

"This coming from the giant. I'm surprised you could get through the church doorway. Do you have to duck when a plane flies overhead? Or when you have to walk under a bridge?"

"Do you have a cubbyhole you sleep in?"

"Okay, you know what – "

"Hey, look, you guys made it without killing each other!" Kendall cried from where he, Jo, and Logan were already waiting for us at the front of the church. "It's a miracle!"

"Shut up," I snapped at him, before turning back to James. "You're just lucky I haven't gotten you a muzzle yet."

He smirked. "I knew you'd like it kinky."

"And handcuffs. I could handcuff you somewhere and then I'd never have to deal with you again."

"That's not going to work," he informed me.

"Yes, it will."

"No, it won't, because I'm not the handcuffee. I'm the handcuffer."

"Those aren't even real words; do you ever pick up a book? And anyway, there's a first time for everything. A street lamp…"

"What?"

"I'm going to handcuff you to a street lamp."

"I'm not getting up and close and personal with a street lamp."

"Tough."

"You're going to have to overpower me if you want to handcuff me to something. And considering I weigh twice as much as you, that's not going to go well for you."

"I'll figure something out. I'm about to graduate from college – I'm smart."

"Whatever you say, Baby Kat." He patted my head.

I growled and stomped on his foot, digging my stiletto heels in through his sneakers, causing him to yank my hair. I shoved him away from me, but his fingers encircled my wrist, dragging me with him and we toppled over, tumbling to the floor, scrabbling to get away from each other as my legs were trapped between his and his fingers dug into my hip.

The pastor decided that that would be an excellent moment to walk out into the sanctuary.

He blinked at James and me, and I shoved James off of me, managing to get my legs unwound from his. "This isn't what it looks like…whatever it looks like…"

"My dear, it is not my place to judge. Although, if I were you, I would refrain from…ahem…doing anything during the reception…"

I gagged slightly. "James and me? No! We're not – gross – "

"It would never happen," James added. "We don't – I think I'm going to be sick – "

I shuddered. "James and I hate each other. We have since he moved next door to us nine years ago."

James nodded in agreement. "Yeah, so believe me – her and me? Never gonna happen. That's sick."

Pastor Wilbur stared at us for a long moment, before shrugging. "Well, the rehearsal ceremony should probably be continued so that you guys can get back to…disliking each other…"

We both nodded stoically, and he signaled for the piano music, which had paused when James and I had begun our attacks on each other, to continue. Carlos and Stephanie walked down the aisle, and once they reached their designated places, the music changed to the bridal march.

Camille walked gracefully down the aisle, finally reaching Logan. He took her hand, beaming at her, and together they faced Pastor Wilbur. He launched into a long speech about eternal love, before leading the lovebirds through their handwritten vows.

Forty-five feet aching minutes later, we were seated in our designated spots at the table that, at this time tomorrow, would be the wedding party's table. Our moms had made a bunch of different dishes for the rehearsal dinner, so our plates were loaded up with beans, brisket, shepherd's pie, anything really that you could think of. James and I were seated next to each other just as we would be the next day during the reception dinner, but we were ignoring the other, focusing instead on our food. A little ways down the table, I could hear sharp hisses being exchanged between Camille and Logan. It was enough for me to glance in their direction, but I couldn't hear anything, so I ignored it.

I went back to my food, just as James spoke up: "So, Katie, I heard this joke the other day, and I immediately thought of you."

I eyed him warily. "What is it?"

He smirked widely. "What do you call a good looking man with a brunette?"

"Lucky as hell," I responded.

"The answer's a hostage."

"Well, la-di-da, that was so fucking funny I almost peed myself from laughing," I deadpanned. "Here's one for you. What's the reason men prefer blondes? Because brunettes aren't as easy to get into bed."

"Hey!" Jo cried. "I resent that remark!"

I chuckled. "Sorry."

"Hmmph."

"Don't be rude to your fellow bridesmaid, Katie," James scolded me, waggling his finger under my nose.

"Do me a favor and shut the fuck up – "

Before James could even respond to that, Camille leapt to her feet. "I can't believe you, Logan. You want to postpone our honeymoon for work?!"

We all shrank back in our chairs a little.

"Oooh, this isn't going to be pretty," Carlos muttered. "Dumbass."

Logan looked up at Camille meekly. "You know how important work is to me…"

"And you know how important our honeymoon is to me! Is this how it's always going to be, Logan? You choosing work over me?"

"Camille, sweetie, it's not like that. But I am an ER doctor and it's really imperative that I be there – "

"Oh, give me a fucking break. They have other ER doctors on hand. It's not like you're the only one in the whole fucking state of Minnesota, Logan. They can manage without you for two weeks."

"Yeah…but…"

"But what?"

"But…I love my job…"

"Ohhh, that was the wrong thing to say," James groaned, face-palming. Considering even he knew that Logan was in deep shit, I didn't want to think about what was going to happen next.

"Well then," Camille said crisply. "I guess that means you don't need a wife to love." And with that, she stormed out of the room.

Everyone turned to Logan, but he just sank low in his chair, nose disappearing under the table.

Jo, Stephanie, Lucy, and I all leapt to our feet to chase after Camille. James followed close behind, and I didn't even bother shooting an insult at him over him over my shoulder. Instead, I just focused on figuring out where Camille had dashed off to.

We found her in the church's parking lot, about to get into her car.

"Where're you going?" Jo asked her, running her fingers through her smooth blonde hair.

"I'm leaving." Camille wiped at her eyes. "I can't do this. It's been like this our entire relationship. First it was school, and then it was interning at the hospital, and now it's work. I'm always second fiddle and I'm sick and tired of it. I can't do this anymore."

"But – but – your wedding's tomorrow…"

"Not anymore. I'm calling it off."

"Cami, you can't just run off because you're upset," Lucy pleaded. "I just learned a whole classical piece on the piano for you! Don't make it go to waste."

"And I appreciate that, I do. And I know this seems sudden to you guys, but the thing is, I've been feeling like this for awhile; I just never said anything. Logan's never really listened and now…Wanting to put our honeymoon off so that he can practically live at the hospital? I'm sorry, but I can't do this, I can't come second to him, I just can't. I'm sorry." And with that, she climbed into her car, backed out of the parking spot, and drove off.

"What now?" Stephanie asked tiredly.

"Pray for a miracle," I suggested.

"Pray that Logan stops being a dumbass," James put in, before turning around. "Well, this is going to be a lame ass wedding without a bride."

"They'll get back together," I said, boosting some confidence into my voice. "They've broken up before and they always end up with each other again. They're meant to be together. And their wedding's tomorrow. She'll go home, drink a couple of beers, and in a few hours she'll call Logan and they'll reconcile. It's not a big deal, it's probably just nerves. I mean, come on. They love each other too much. It's just pre-wedding jitters, that's all. And if nothing else, Logan will realize where he went wrong and he'll fix it, he always does. We have nothing to worry about."

James nodded in agreement, hands in his jeans pockets. "They won't end up with anyone else. Because if they did, who knows what would happen?"

Truer words had never been spoken.


So...What'd you guys think? Did you love it? Hate it? Like it? Run away screaming? If you guys could do me a humongous favor and review and let me know what you thought of it, I would really appreciate it! :)